Hellsing's Humanist
by Misty Legionnaire
Summary: First fanfic. What happens when one is caught between Anderson, devout religious hunter and Alucard, non-standard vampire, when one is not religious and sure doesn't want to be caught between the two.
1. Airport Glass

AN: Edited for better clarity and continuity.

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I had finally made it to England, to London specifically. At least my great grandfather would be unable to come after me now.

I detested having a priest in the family. My mother and father hadn't been religious so why as the last descendent he had, had to become a member of the church?

Go figure.

Yet he couldn't come into England, much less London without causing a major snafu with the local groups.

Yippee for me.

A woman in a pantsuit that made her look way too masculine walked by with a tall man in a...red pimp style fedora and equally pimp jacket. Black vest, grey pants, black knee high riding boots completed his look.

Well, England was a whole new place. Got to expect people to dress different.

I took up my bag, adding it to my carry on and strode towards the waiting cabs.

Good thing I had this planned far ahead of time.

No more Father Anderson for me.

Then I sensed them. Vampires. In the airport.

Screams erupted.

I whirled in time to watch a vampire bite into the neck of a mother, crushing her poor baby at the same time.

Two other vampires were leaping.

I couldn't stand by, let them die. Not like Anderson.

I looked to the glass fronted store. It cracked, shattered, the pieces hovering by my will into the air.

"Vamps!" my voice rang with the fervor equal to any preacher.

They looked up at me.

"Didn't anyone tell you airport food isn't palatable? Or are you all scum?"

They leapt at me.

The glass pieces diced them, separating their hearts from their bodies and severing heads.

Dust splashed the floor.

Another vampire turned the corner but he leapt up to the railing above, ignoring me.

Blam.

A chunk of concrete flew as the vamp lost a leg.

He landed on his remaining leg, turned towards me.

Launching at me the next instant.

"Get out of there!" a voice shouted.

My lips pulled back as I hit him with a wall.

He went "umpph!" then skidded to the side, his face bashed in.

I turned, sending the last glass at the vampire, dusting him too.

"Amateurs," I scowled at the dust.

"Who are you and how did you divert his attack?"

I turned to the pantsuit woman, noting her blond hair and spectacles, "Probably unused to leaping with one leg," like I was going to admit to doing anything. I had my fill of those who thought I was crazy.

Click.

My eyes slid to the side, to a big ass gun. Oh dear.

Pimp man held the gun.

"Shall I kill her, master?"

The woman spoke coldly, "I am giving you ten seconds to explain yourself."

She counted.

At one, I flicked the safety on his gun to "on" with a mental thought.

"Shoot, Alucard."

Click. He looked startled, then frowned.

"No boom today. A boom tomorrow, always a boom tomorrow."

The woman frowned, "Babylon 5, Commander Ivonava?"

Well, you'd have thought any englishwoman would know that reference. Yet her confusion gave me enough time to activate my page teleport.

"Bye," I said in a dark male voice, as I flashed out of there.

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I laid on my futon, relaxing.

Vampires. My grandfather's enemy.

Now I fucked with them on English soil. I'd have to move again.

My sigh turned into a yelp when there was an explosion from my front door.

A swat team stormed in and subdued me in seconds.

Drat.

I coughed past the dust, debris.

"May I *cough* ask *cough cough* what's happening?"

I was then gagged and hooded.

Lovely.

They marched me out of my flat, down the stairs and into a large vehicle. Van? Truck?

"Sir Integra we have secured the target. She did not resist arrest but did ask a question. No sir, she did not attack us. ETA is twenty minutes."

Twenty minutes? Twenty minutes to my death?

I swallowed, scared.

My grandfather was better than this. At least he wouldn't kill me, even if I didn't believe in God.

Twenty minutes passed too quickly and I was marched down a gravel path into a building, down some stairs, through hallways and finally to a small room.

I was chained to a chair. My wrists and legs were secured tightly. I had a bad feeling it was to make sure I couldn't move when the torture started.

The hood was removed with a sharp jerk, taking some strands of my hair.

I blinked in the sudden light.

Drat. Pantsuit woman and pimp man "Alucard" were opposite me.

The gag was removed harshly, causing the side of my mouth to start bleeding.

Lovely.

"Do you know why you are here?"

"Due to the airport incident and your man's gun misfire most likely."

"So calm. You do realize we don't like Iscariot in our country."

"What does Judas Iscariot do with anything? I am not him even if he managed to live this long."

"Section Thirteen."

"Are you sure you aren't the crazy people here?"

"Alucard?"

"She doesn't know what we are talking about."

"How did you do the same trick Father Anderson did in Ireland?"

My face darkened, "I am not apart of anything dealing with that self-righteous stuck up cyst."

Great, he was causing me issues even when I was gone!

She pulled out a cigar.

I calmly asked, "Would it be too much to ask that you do not smoke in my presence?"

She raised an eyebrow, "Don't like smoke?"

"I've been in three different house fires due to people smoking. My nose is sensitive after that. I rather not have my nose in a twist, please," plus smoke scent in my hair.

She set the cigar back, "So why do you not like Father Anderson?"

"He didn't save my family from vampires though he claims he would have. They took my youngest brother when I was five, my oldest brother when I was ten, then finally my parents last year. I have no respect for a man that promises one thing then breaks it the next. The fact he uses God's Plan is abhorrent to me and what I follow."

"What religion do you subscribe to?"

"None. I am a humanist."

"Humanist?" she looked baffled.

"The only fate is that which people, humans, make for themselves. There is no invisible deity or deities out there looking after us. If there are, they are sick bastards and not the benevolent ones people believe in."

Alucard laughed insanely. I leaned back away from him when I caught sight of the fangs.

He didn't read as vamp to me. Drat, drat, DRAT!

"Why would a," she smiled, "bible-thumper be interested in you?"

"He had dealings with my grandfather, of which I don't know about, that seems to make him think I'll fall right in line like a good Christian. I figured as England is off-limits to him, I'd have some peace for one in a year. Didn't expect vamps to be here in public."

"Which brings us back to the matter at hand. How did you know that you wouldn't be killed?"

"I had a fifty-fifty chance the the gun was safetied. I got lucky," liar lair hoping my pants don't catch fire.

Alucard's face darkened in rage.

She considered me, "And the flying glass?"

"I have no clue who did that, who was still in the area," besides myself anyway, "but it was pretty cool. I didn't know a vamp could die by glass. I could make a fortune with shivs."

"Your records show you've had three stints into mental institutions."

"Because the general populace are stupid when it comes to the predators. They thought I was insane as I spouted about vamps."

She glared at me.

I frowned, what was she getting at?

"It shows that you were around similar incidents as the one here. Flying glass, against the laws of physics. Broken walls while in a straight-jacket. Broken wrist from across the room."

"Maybe I have a stalker. I've had a couple of those."

She smiled, "You can be straight with me, or I can have Alucard make you a vampire and take the information."

I went pale, "Make me...a vamp?"

He grinned, "Seras would love to have a sister."

Memories rose without my beckoning. Five years old and later. Fangs. The promise of slavery.

The next instant, my head was bowed, my body straining against my bonds and I was hyper-ventilating.

I felt tears from the corners of my eyes and my voice chanting, "No, no, no."

"She broke too easily, my master."

"Alex, sit up."

I slowly got up, my breath slowing and the room stayed steady.

"Tell me and I won't laugh at you like these fools did."

"How could you tell that?" I sounded wimpy.

"They way they wrote. They laughed it off."

"You break your word on this and there will be no other chance," I said harshly, my voice steading.

She nodded, "I won't laugh at what you will tell me."

My eyes flickered to the vampire.

"I can't control him that far."

I inhaled, hoping she would be the first to hear me out, "I'm what's referred to as a telekinetic with empathic tendencies if one subscribes to science fiction and/or fantasy."

"You threw up a wall that sent the vamp to your side? You broke the window and used the fragments to slice open the vampires?"

"Yes."

"Is that why Father Anderson is after you?"

"A plus if he knew. To my knowledge he doesn't know I am this powerful."

"What does he know of you?"

"I use the page teleport like he does, but my books are not the bible. I can use any book, large or small. I prefer the pocket dictionary. Until now I could pinpoint a vamp without seeing them and some of their abilities."

"Why until now?"

I looked at Alucard, "I couldn't sense he was a vamp and now I know, I don't know what he is capable of."

He grinned, "I'm more than those pitiful copies."

I shivered, "That is all I have."

"So the safety on Alucard's gun?"

"I switched it at your call of 'one' and hoped he didn't notice in time to shoot me."

She laughed, "What if he had?"

I smiled sheepishly, "I would have ejected the clip followed by a course of walls between me and the bullet with the hope the gun would blow up, otherwise I'd be dead and finding out if there really is an afterlife and I was sentenced to hell for my lack of believe."

She sat back, "You'll be staying with us until we asses your abilities under controlled conditions," she looked over at Alucard, "As we are still repairing the Hellsing manor, you'll be bunking with Alucard."

I gaped, "What!"

Alucard chuckled which quickly progressed to a full laugh.

"But, but," I so didn't want to be anywhere near the abnormal vampire.

"Are you a virgin, my dear?" Alucard leaned down, his spectacles slipping down to reveal red eyes.

"That's why I don't want to be near you."

The woman started at this, "You are a virgin?"

"Yes, I am."

"Those institutions."

I interrupted, "I concussed those who tried to take my virginity. I'm not keeping it so I'd be vampire food."

She stood, "Those are my orders. Alucard, release her from her restraints and walk her to your room."

"Yes, my master."

"What about my blood and its internal status?" I asked as she left.

She didn't respond. I looked back at the vampire.

"I'll make you a deal," he stated calmly, "You fight me in...our room with your full abilities and I won't bite you for the day."

I frowned, "I take it everyday you'll be testing me again and again?"

"I sense you even hold back and," he grinned revealing teeth gone sharky, "Then you'll be my draculina."

I swallowed, "Did you want me to open up at full or may I ramp it up at my own speed?"

He seemed to think on it, "By the end of the session you will be at maximum power."

"What if we are interrupted?"

He scowled, "Why so specific?"

"Just cuz you are a vamp does not mean I'm holding you to a lesser standard for your word than humans."

That appeased him, "Unless interrupted."

"That is agreeable. Is there any exceptions I should be aware of?"

"You would make a wonderful vampire," he waved his hand.

The chains and leather restraints fell off.

I stood, "Please lead the way, Mister Alucard."

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He had a coffin, a throne, a table with a bottle of wine, two glasses and that was it for his stuff.

On the far side of the room from the coffin sat a cot, a dresser, a desk with a computer and a dressing screen. A single lamp sat on the desk.

No reading in bed.

The bathroom was down the hall.

Kitchen up three floors.

The nearest person was supposedly Seras and she wasn't here.

Fear batted at me as I turned to face Alucard.

I was facing a different kind of vampire with my powers.

Was it safe to use my full abilities?

He grinned, "Come on."

I raised an eyebrow, then inhaled prepping myself.

"Did you want object oriented for starters or the walls like the other vamp?"

He shrugged, "Fight me. Cut me to pieces. Hurry. Hurry!" His grin flashed his blood lust.

I shattered the used wine glass, threw the pieces at him, through his heart.

He bled, his heart bouncing across the floor. He laughed as the heart melted, became centipedes.

I crushed the bugs with a wall as I thrust the glass at his throat, just to shut him up.

His hand came out of nowhere.

My shield hit his fingers, held for a second before bending inward.

I smacked him with another wall, physically dodging to the side as the one his hand was hitting crumpled. I kicked out, enhancing the blow with my full mental strength.

He hit the stone wall at his back, laughing, "Yes. More! Hurry!"

I was already taxing, damn it.

Panting, I thought of thousands of knives slashing him.

Blood flew, sprayed the wall.

I could tell it wasn't slowing him.

My head pounded, my head going dizzy as he straightened from the wall, healing before my eyes.

I went to my knees, "Drat it," I tried to get up again, only making it halfway before my legs dumped me unto the floor.

I panted, letting the cold stone sooth my poor head.

He stood over me, scowling, "That's all?"

"I've done sixteen page teleports, then the airport stuff and now this. You want more, you'll have to wait until I've recovered. I'm not some super vampire with unlimited strength, Mister Alucard." I tried to push myself up again only to collapse, "I hate being this weak."

He picked me up, bridal style, "I suppose for tonight, you'll give me a sip of blood."

I sighed, "I take it you think I didn't go full out," I pushed weakly at his chest, insulted but too much a wimp at the moment to budge him.

He set me on the bed, "I am only tasting, no bites."

"Taste from," his mouth sealed over mine.

I struggled, pushing at him, in fear.

His tongue raked the side of my lips, delivering pain.

The cut from the gag. I slowly relaxed. Drat it. My first kiss was from a vamp tasting my blood.

He straightened, "You are a virgin," he smirked, pleased.

"Done for tonight?" I asked, though I was already falling asleep now I was horizontal on a rather comfortable bed.

"I look forward to tomorrow."


	2. Through Blood Truth be Told

09/21 - Edited to hopefully flow better.

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I awoke, confused for a moment.

Then I looked over at his coffin.

Lovely. There goes the hope I was in my flat.

At least he was asleep.

I got up, grabbed a change of clothes and headed for the bathroom.

I didn't have my usual cleansers so I made do, rinsing the dust and debris from yesterday's assault from my body.

When I was decently cleaned and smelling of lavender, which was not my favored flavor, I dressed in jeans and a T-shirt with the logo of a popular online game I played. I was the non-human faction. Funny I was bunking with the non-human. Damn the collective human decisions.

Pacing back to the room, I contemplated the computer.

My luck was holding as they got my preferred brand.

A headphone set was beside it.

Vampire with vampiric hearing. Me with human hearing. Self explanatory.

I started it up with the headset plugged in.

It had the proper programs, except my game.

I wondered if I could track down someone to get either my stuff with the game, or let me out to purchase another copy.

I explored the documents and came across one labelled "Debriefing Report"

Opening it, I scanned the contents.

Name of reporter, section, rank, mission, location of mission, ghouls slain, vampires slain, causalities...wait...ghouls?

"What are ghouls?" I murmured.

"They are the result of a defiled human being bitten by a vampire," Alucard's voice made me jump, then he came through the wall. I guess he hadn't been sleeping. Drat.

I leapt from the chair and stood starting at him as he fully exited the wall then sat on the edge of my desk.

Vamps didn't do that. Drat, cyst, drat.

I would have died a while ago if all vamps could do that.

"Also if a ghoul bites another human, virgin or no."

"Would you refrain from using the walls as doors. I do believe there's a proper doorway around here to use."

He smirked, "I wouldn't be so cheeky, human, if you knew what I could do to you," his grin widened.

This was when my empathy picked a bad time to power on.

Blood, pleasure, need, pain, suffering.

War!

I jerked my head back, hoping the sudden shift of my brain's position would sever the connection.

It did.

He smirked, "Liked what you saw?"

"No," I answered honestly, "I didn't. I knew such exists but until today I never knew anyone who had all those perverted desires inside them, mixed well with a dash of insanity."

If I thought on what I'd experienced I'd happily sign myself back into the institutions willingly.

Yet he bore out my theory that there were no gods of love, pleasure, gentleness, good. A sane god who loved his creations would never allow the existence of such a being. He thrived on war, blood, misery. He wanted the world to devolve into madness. He would be in the center, eating it all up, devouring the world, bit by gory bit.

As I didn't support gods of goodness, I did not support their antithesis. Hell. The devil didn't need to exist as Alucard was here on Earth, dealing out his brand of torture. Those souls would go crying to the devil if he did exist to be granted leave from Alucard.

Perhaps, if I had believed in deities I wouldn't be here.

I wouldn't have moved to London, England. I wouldn't have run into and killed three vamps, coming to the attention of this organization.

Bang.

I jumped a full foot into the air as wood struck stone.

"Master!"

All I got to see was white and green whizzing by with an impression of vamp, weak, no special powers, fed once by herself.

Alucard vanished.

Green and white blur became a very busty strawberry blond girl with red eyes.

She considered me, "Whose the new girl, master?"

Silence.

I rolled my eyes, "Hi, Alex Jones-Jordan," I offered my hand, hoping she didn't crush it.

She shook gently, as if she often worked with humans, "Sera Victoria. Are you," she frowned at me, "Alucard left a note he had a new fledgling."

My mouth went narrow, so I had to ground out, "Let me guess, he's being preemptive?"

She flushed, "I'll be going."

"No, please," I decided I needed time away from him, "Would you please give me the grand tour. I only got to see where the kitchen was and this hallway."

"Sure, right this way."

At least there were some nice people here. Perhaps my fate wouldn't rest solely on my ability to fight at full bore each night to Alucard's entertainment.

"Sir Integra keeps the kitchen stocked for us."

I tuned in from noting important areas as she pulled out a blood packet. We had ended the tour in the kitchen.

"I take his holiness downstairs prefers fresh?"

"He takes this, but yes, he prefers alive and kicking," she muttered, "Virgin too."

"What was that?" I asked knowing she'd evade.

"Just wondering when the new butler was going to take down Alucard's meal."

I sure hoped Alucard was not counting on me being this days meal.

"So what do you do around here, Miss Victoria?"

"Just Seras," she tore into the bag and drank it down in one gulp, wiping her face clean when done, "I support the troops with artillery fire when dealing with ghouls and vampires. Also get down there if they need it."

"So you clean up any vamp and ghoul infestations in London?"

"The whole of England, actually," she went to the waste basket and pitched in her empty bag.

I opened a cabinet and pulled down a box of oatmeal. Prepping my own meal, I asked her what her roles were, how missions went and what Alucard did on them. I dug in while she explained.

"He's considered the Hellsing Trashman. Used for the nastiest of the nastiest. Most of the routine stuff plain bores him. Those vamps are barely more than humans in terms of strength," Seras smiled as if at some special joke, "Average humans anyway. When we had Millennium running around he was far happier."

"Millennium?"

"That's classified," Pantsuit woman said in a cold tone.

I watched Seras salute with, "Sir Integra."

So Sir Integra was the leader with maybe Alucard jostling for more...intense fights? I was worried I was in way over my head. I rinsed my bowl, set it aside, before facing her.

"Good morning," I greeted.

"Seems that we are meeting with Iscariot and they want you in on the meeting."

"Why would they want me in on it when I have no clue who these Iscariots are?"

"Father Anderson will most likely be there."

I felt my lips thin as I thought evil nasty things about my great grandfather, "Is my presence mandatory, Sir Integra?"

"Yes. Police Girl, help her find a uniform."

"Uniform?" I had a bad feeling about this as I looked at Seras' clothing.

Mini-skirt was the nicest term for it.

"Yes, Alex," Integra ordered.

Several minutes later I was in uniform, silently growling at the ridiculous clothing.

I sat next to Seras in the transportation truck with ten men, who obviously were looking at my legs.

Human male nature. I was tall, not so busty as Seras. My legs were where most of my height had settled. So the uniform that made Seras look really damn good, made me look out of place. When I checked in the mirror, I swear that it looked like I was two-thirds leg, one third chest and head.

It didn't help that I now had four knives hanging from my belt, a bunch of throwing stars tucked into a pouch and a necklace disguising a garrote.

Sir Integra was not pleased that I had not even one hour of training in guns, bows nor any projectile weaponry save what I could fling mentally or physically.

I had the feeling a certain vampire, who wasn't present, was going to be my teacher. I was going to be one sore puppy after he was done with me.

The doors opened and the men filed out.

"I find it easier to get out and go," Seras whispered to me when I hesitated over moving in the dang mini-skirt.

I stood, got out and joined the men in line. Seras fell in beside me.

"Right men," Ensign Michael, one of the co heads below Captain Sonny Smithins spoke.

And women, I added mentally to his words.

"Group A, you lot are around the corner with Ensign Mel. Group B with me. Seras, roof opposite. Alex?"

I straightened, "Yes sir?"

"You stick close to Sir Integra."

Where she would protect me, obviously, "Certainly, sir."

Sir Integra came up as the troops vanished into the night.

"Walk with me, Alex."

I did so. I was so out of depth here. Might as well follow the leader, hoping for the best.

A hand ghosted up my back but I ignored it. I so wasn't freaking out due to my mind playing tricks on a stressful night with vamps and these Iscariot people about. Besides, if it was Alucard, I didn't want to acknowledge he annoyed and scared me. I'd rather face the damn vamps when I was five and powerless again than willingly spend time in his presence.

"Is there anything you want to say before we go into this, Alex?"

I looked over at her, "You know the one thing that has punished or hurt me the most. Was there something else you want to know?"

She stopped, pulled a cigar out. At least we were outside and the smoke wouldn't bother me too much.

"How about why Father Anderson is not only here but insisted that you were along?"

"I made it clear to him last we met that I would have no part in his beliefs, nor his fanaticism. If the message wasn't clear to him then, I'll reiterate it much more firmly."

She smiled, "Did you know your grandfather went on his hunts regularly when he was spry?"

I inhaled slowly, "I suspected, but couldn't find any solid proof he had. Father Anderson should know that I am not my grandfather, nor father and won't be going in with his plans just because an ancestor of mine played priests and monsters with him long before I was born."

Alucard laughed at my back, causing me to jump.

He was smirking when he leaned over my shoulder, "I look forward to the Judas Priest starting a fight over you."

I glared, "If he does, it will be the last time he does so under the mistaken impression I'm a helpless girl."

"Ah, but with the wicked monster, you are a helpless, little, girl."

I hated his dark tone, and the eagerness behind it. He was hoping blood would be shed this night. I was looking for a peaceful resolution with both sides having the same number of people walking out of this in a single piece.

We entered a formal garden. Too bad it was night time. I bet the flowers were dazzling in sunlight.

"What time is it, Alex?"

I looked at my watch, "Ten to eleven, Sir Integra."

She surveyed the area, scowling at the lack of seating arrangements. She started for one of the few benches that were intact. I guess some areas were still repairing from the fight a few months back.

I followed, picking my way carefully.

Then I sensed Anderson.

I stopped and looked right where he'd be shortly.

Alucard's hand rubbed the center of my back, "Go."

I continued to walk, but I sensed Anderson's approach. He was angry. Upset.

Funny, now he's upset where before he had shrugged off the deaths of my family as if they were nothing.

I stopped at the side of Sir Integra. She looked at my face curiously.

"Anderson is approaching from that direction with another, sir," I whispered, my eyes then tracking to two more people who I didn't know, "Two more, left side. Cool and detached. Professionals."

She gazed out as if she was admiring the dark rows of bushes and trees.

A man appeared with Anderson at his back.

Integra stiffened slightly, while I kept my face expressionless.

"Good evening, Sir Integra," the unknown man smiled, "A pleasure to make your acquaintance."

"Archbishop Marvin Marcellini."

Marvin? Bad name. Who names their child Marvin and expect him to be normal. Marvin the Martian.

"Why have you called this meeting, Archbishop?"

"We wish to retrieve what is ours without bloodshed."

The way his eyes went to me, made my stomach twist. No one owned me. Not by my leave as yet.

"Oh?" Integra pulled a lighter and lit her cigar, "To what are you referring and what claim do you have on it?"

"The girl beside you, Alex Jones-Jordan. She is ours."

I stayed still, no matter how much I wanted to smash his nose in.

"Why do you claim her? She is a humanist. A non-believer."

"That is a lie she tells others. Her mental state has deteriorated over the years and she is best left to our care."

I sensed his emotions then.

The only thing keeping me upright and steady was a hand at the center of my back. I sure hoped my face was blank.

Lust, dominance, power, viciousness, vindictiveness.

He felt he owned me as he owned Anderson. A tool. No worse. A thing for his lust to be sated with.

"I have seen and heard her. She is much more mentally sound than most in my own organization. In fact, my doctors state that she appears to be in much better health now that her powers are acknowledged and respected than dismissed as fantasy. Far less antsy as previously reported by those in power."

Drat it. I should have know that the mirror in that interrogation room was a one-way.

"Her ability to teleport? Ha!"

"Alex," was all Integra needed to say.

I lifted four of the five broken benches into the air while scooping up water to form an impromptu fountain.

Marvin sneered at the display, "This proves nothing."

"Please take a seat then."

I moved the fifth partially broken bench to their backs and struck their legs just right.

They both sat down heavily before being set down in front of Sir Integra.

She puffed with a smile, "I seriously doubt she would respect you enough to do as you will, Archbishop."

"Alex," Anderson spoke, "Tis is na ye way. Ye have bin in God's good graces."

I looked to Integra. She indicated that I speak.

"There is no god or deity I pray to. The only fate we have is that which we make as a collective. A single person can change the world without being of the same religion as those who are influenced by their actions. More wars have broken out over ideological differences than the actions of a country against another. Christians of each flavor have fought each other over the same invisible man in the sky that tells you you shouldn't do this."

"There is a god and he made you," Marvin sneered.

I looked again at Sir Integra. She was smiling.

"No god created me. I am the product of myself and this species called homo sapien."

"You are one of God's chosen, as is Father Anderson."

"A god that says 'thou shalt not kill' does not have a right to bring about weapons that are then labelled God's Chosen. Either he is a good nature being that has messed up down here by mistake, or evil has won the earth to allow such grievances against man by his fellow man, or there is no god and this insanity called Earth is but the mixture of human nature, both good and bad, coming together to form a whole."

Marvin stood pointed at me, "Blasphemer!"

"I belong to a group in my online game called 'Blasphemy' so yes that is right," I smiled at his bafflement.

"Lass," Anderson stood, "Tis is na but a rebellion against yer family."

I sensed Integra homing in on this.

"My only family, died by vampire hands while you lot stayed safe behind your hallowed walls, echoing empty hymns to a being that doesn't exist. 'Trust in Allah, but tie up your camel.' This simple adage is what you have forgotten. God does not help us. We form the actions of this world. Our words carry the weight of thousands who have gone before us into the nothingness, and those that are to be."

Anderson opened his mouth but Marvin snapped, "You are a descendent of Father Anderson."

I felt the air still, cyst, Integra was listening very intently now.

"Not according to the family tree. Sorry your claim is not recognized. Thank you for playing, please come again."

Just leave me alone. I want no part in your games, Marvin the martian.

"Your tree was fabricated to hide this. You have powers no human but those changed by our will to have."

I felt sweat trickle down my back, "Well, then you are declaring yourselves gods."

He snarled, "I am not."

"Only god has the power to create life and powers beyond ourselves," I knew this was either going to make my point or break it, "So now you are God? Well, too dang bad I don't adhere to any deity."

"Your body belongs to the church."

"Ah so we are now going back to slavery. Thanks for the notice. In that case, I'm already purchased and you have no claim."

"She is not your master."

"She is if you continue this farce," I meant every word.

Integra ordered, "Go on back to the vehicle, Alex. I have some chores for you to deal with later, servant."

Taking a page out of Alucard's behavior, I bowed, "As you wish, my master."

I walked away, hoping I didn't get shot in the back.

Once inside the van with Captain Sonny, I watched the rest of the exchange.

"So you would take what is rightfully ours, Sir Integra?"

"When were you going to tell her that she was Anderson's blood?"

"She already knew three months ago. She's playing you."

"Let me guess you outright told her without proof. How do you expect your words to reach open ears when you go about things so...bluntly?"

"It is meh blood that runs in her, Sir Integra Wingate Hellsing," Anderson scowled, "She has denied her blood since ah approached her."

"Why do you think she did, Father Anderson?"

"She is stuck on this story obviously of no gods, like you Protestant devils," Marvin snarled, "And you the head whore."

Alucard's voice dominated, "You call my master a whore? What strong language you use, Archbishop."

Okay, I was rooting for the vamp. Evil Marvin versus Insane Alucard. I bet Alucard would win with hands down.

"Go team vamp," I muttered.

Captain Sonny gave me an odd look but I knew I wasn't entirely sane to most people, except Sir Integra's doctors. Hmm when had she arranged to have her doctors examine me? Or had she given them a video tape to analyze?


	3. Aura of Pain

Please review. I would love to know if things are just not working or what pieces people love.

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"Monster!" Anderson drew his blades.

I bit my lip, "I don't like Sir Integra being that close to him."

Captain Sonny agreed, "Seras, keep an eye out. Group Alpha advance. Beta get ready."

He shouldered a rifle, then slid a headset over my ears, "Seras, work with Alex. She can hear you now."

I whispered, "Seras?"

"Alex, can you extend a shield around Sir Integra from your position?"

"I've never tried from this distance. It won't be reliable."

Sonny left the vehicle and vanished into the night.

I focused my will into a wall between the two sides, encasing Sir Integra.

My breath became labored, but I felt it solid and firm around her. Attacks would bounce off yet particles would escape from her side, like her smoke. Her voice would be unaffected.

"You christians always on with the same inane prattle. A woman has stood here firm in her convictions that there are no gods, and another defies your conventions of right and wrong. How pitiful that these women are so much wiser than you lot."

He pulled two guns, one black, one silver.

The violence factor rose as my head pounded viciously. "Seras?"

"How much longer can you hold, Alex?"

"A few minutes, that's all." I panted, gritting against the migraine building behind my eyes.

A wave of shimmering color started in the center of my vision. Drat! I would soon be incapacitated with blinding pain once the aura passed from my right eye to my left.

Anderson stepped sideways then stopped as if he sensed the shield.

"She would die for ye?" he sounded shocked.

"What do you mean, Father Anderson?"

He snarled, back stepping, "Archbishop, we should leave before the lass burns herself out."

Marvin sneered, "We will continue this once Alex has had her rest. I would recommend you get her a migraine pill as her types are prone to overexertion."

They retreated. I held for a few seconds more before releasing the barrier.

The aura expanded to fill my whole right eye.

"Here," I looked seeing a pill and a glass of water through my good eye.

Captain Sonny smiled, "I get them too. I'll go see if we have a can of coke around."

I took the pill, noting the stylish 'E' Excedrin used. My brand of migraine medicine, "Thank you."

I swallowed the pill, chased by the water.

He smiled as he stepped out before saying, "Sir Integra."

I slowly pushed to my feet, then stepped to the ground.

The next few moments could very well break what little I had.

Sir Integra gazed at me for a long moment, puffing her cigar.

"Migraines?"

"Mine are usually food based. My powers burn through calories which is why I am so thin. I generally have 1 kilo of food per meal with four meals a day."

"You burned too much calories inciting a migraine?"

I nodded, "Yes, sir."

She sighed, "You were shielding me from attack?"

"Yes sir," I expected a slap or put down.

"You did well. It made Anderson back down. That is impressive," she scowled, "From now on make sure to eat what you need."

"Yes, sir."

Seras trotted up with her cannon.

"How soon will the migraine hit?"

"Soon, but it won't be as bad as it could be."

"How so?"

"Sir Integra," Captian Sonny spoke, "I had migraine pills with me. It should take the edge off the pain."

She considered him for a long moment, "I take it you have migraines as well?"

"They are rare now. I suffered them more when I was younger. I carry the pills on the off chance I need them."

"Good work, my soldiers," she included me with a glance.

-----------

I lay on the bed, suffering the pain in the dark room I shared with Alucard. This was one benefit.

No noise save my own, darkness, mild temperature.

Perfect when recovering from a migraine.

What would be better is a nice bath maybe.

I inhaled as it felt like thousands of fingers were massaging my feet. As if. My mind had to be playing tricks on me again with the edge of the migraine dulling my senses.

"Master! Oh!!"

My eyes opened, went to the open door in surprise, to see Seras staring at my feet, haloed by too bright light.

Then I looked down.

Alucard was smirking at me, thousand tendrils covering my skin from the ankles and lower.

"Ahhh!" I jerked my feet free of him, "Good grief!"

Then my migraine spiked, making me clutch my head.

I buried my head in the pillow, groaning in pain.

"Go away, Police Girl."

"Y-yes, master."

I heard the door close.

"You aren't taking care of yourself."

"I've been here, what a day? Not enough time to get back to normal food habits. I was used to my game as my timer to eat."

"You are as bad as Police Girl," he started chuckling which irritated my sensitive ears, "I'm calling you Judas Girl from now on."

I kicked him, "Just go away or be quiet."

The silence dragged on until my body relaxed, the pain easing enough that I could slip into a nap.

The feeling of fingers rubbing my back started up.

I decided if Alucard was going to take care of me it was best to recover quickly. Then I can entertain him with my useless attacks.

"You hate Anderson."

I murmured an assent.

"Just because of his religion?"

I sighed, lifting my face free of the pillow. He wasn't going to let it go.

"After my youngest brother died, Anderson sat with me while my parents grieved. He promised that no other vampire would ever kill a member of my family. I was only five but I understood honor. His word was given. For a time there was no attack, and I simply assumed he was a guardian angel. Protecting us from the monsters.

"Days before my tenth birthday, vampires entered our home. My brother got me in the vents and faced them. They ate him, scrawled messages against the our white walls. They tried to dig to me but couldn't change their form, nor had the strength to rip open the vent. I knew Anderson didn't care enough to save me nor my family. Only I can protect myself."

He laughed softly, surprisingly below the threshold that pained me, "So the little Judas Girl grew to hate the Paladin."

"Paladin?"

"Father Anderson."

"I prefer that I hold a grudge against him."

I groaned as he popped a knot.

"Do you hold one for me?"

I flicked a glance to his spectacles, thought of it, "I don't think so. You've not done anything as grievous as Anderson has as yet. I doubt you would want to sink to his level."

"We'll see if you feel that way when you've recovered."

I didn't like the sound of that, "Thank you Alucard. You seem more noble than most men."

He laughed, loud and insane. Pain radiated through my head but its was less and less each minute. He warned me which was a hell of a lot better than any other man.

There was a knock.

I eyed the door with dread. He chuckled.

Another knock. I got up, went to the door, covering my eyes with my hand while I pulled open the door.

"Captain Sonny?" I felt confused.

He held out a bottle, "In case you need this for the future," he paled as his eyes went over my shoulder, "Sir Integra's orders."

I looked back. I saw nothing, yet I bet Alucard was intimidating the Captain, "My thanks, Captain. Hopefully if this lets up shortly, I'll be in the kitchen to get back on my feeding schedule," the bottle was brand new. Excedrin.

"May I recommend you keep some energy bars on your person? Seems you don't have the best luck in timing."

I smiled, "I'll track down the person in charge of groceries and get some added for me. That is an excellent idea."

"Get well soon. Integra wants you on the range every day until you can shoot with the best of us humans."

I grimaced, "I'll have to hit you up later for which guns I should start with."

He waved as he walked away.

I shut the door, then faced Alucard, "Something wrong? Do you have a better suggestion?"

He looked down on me, "As a draculina you could."

I swallowed, "No please," he leaned further down, going for my neck.

Images of vamps leering at me, snarling promises to rape me. A vamp to be tortured forever.

He was flung across the room. His expression curious.

"No," I coughed out, "I'm not becoming you're toy."

I migraine kicked back up into agony.

I opened the door. Either I was going to be suffering a long while, or I got food and maybe go sleep somewhere else.

I stepped into the hall.

"Good evening."

I blinked at the man in front of me, "Um, good evening sir."

"Sir Integra ordered your meal brought to your room, Miss Alex."

Damn it. Cyst.

"Thank you. I was about to come get some," I had to eat in the same room as the vamp. Sigh.

I walked back in.

He was swirling what looked to be wine in his last wine glass.

The man set the food on my desk.

"Also Sir Integra has had your items brought up to the house. I'll bring the boxes to the store room across the way. She mentioned this one was of interest to you."

I brightened in spite of the migraine, "My game. Thank you sir."

"Indeed. Please leave the dishes on the cart which I will leave outside for you," he turned to Alucard, "Your O-negative, Alucard."

A bucket of ice and a packet of blood. Once set on Alucard's table, the man retreated.

Good thing I was B positive.

I sat and pulled the lid off my meal.

Steak, mashed potatoes, noodles, a bowl of soup and a slice of wheat bread.

I cut a piece of steak and chewed it.

Perfection.

I continued eating, starting up the game copying.

I had the full game, its two expansions and the second to current patch ready to go on my back-up discs. I started the copying process.

The food was good. The migraine took forever to ease, but I could feel my energy rising.

Ping.

I set down the bowl, finished for the time being. My game was almost ready.

I started up the game and logged in.

My guild bombarded me questions.

I typed, "I've relocated. Turned out my first location wasn't good. Took forever to get me my stuff and I'm on new equipment. Anything I can help with before I am called away for my new job?"

Deri answered, "We've missed you. We are sunk without a Tank. Especially your big bear butt."

I chuckled.

"Let me guess Hendi's thin feminine body is too little cover for your magnificent healing powers! He can't cover your...bust," I smiled as the guild master whispered me.

"Welcome back, Tarnana. Its been a while. Glad to see you online. Btw, the guild bank needs bags."

I sighed, irritated. I whispered him back, "On it."

"What is this?"

I jumped, yelped as Alucard looked at the screen.

"Its the game I play."

"To what purpose?"

"I was always afraid of involving real people as friends due to the vamps so I got this game so I could interact on some level," I explained.

"You are a cow?"

I laughed, "That is my avatar. She's a tauren. More like a minotaur than a cow."

"And that?"

"A too muscular male human. Looks to be a mage class."

He leaned over my shoulder, "What class are you?"

"Druid. I shape-change for my feral spec into bear or cat form. If I go to my healing spec I can become a tree."

"A tree? Ha!"

I scowled at him, "My healing in that form to my group members is more than any class."

"A healing...tree?" he roared with laughter.

Sir Integra's voice cut in, "I wouldn't be laughing so hard Alucard. Quite a few of my staff play the same game."

I blinked at Sir Integra, "Is there a Hellsing Guild?"

"Hardly, they play to avoid the others, though I did not know you were so active in your guild."

"Fairly active," my character was already making bags for my guildies.

She smiled, "Seventeen successful raids into the newest dungeon."

"We have a good guild leader."

Alucard sneered, "A simple game."

"Alucard, the newest dungeon requires unparalleled strategic talent and authority. In fact the newest soldiers that are in training now use this game to teach solidarity, strategy, command," she smirked, "Alex, also know as Tarnana of Blasphemy is considered the top battle-caller in the world."

"Ack," I stared at her. The top...in the world?

"In fact Captain Sonny has improved for his current position via this same game. He is considered in the top hundred," she considered him, "Weren't you impressed with him in the last few weeks?"

"This game did that?" I did not like the look he directed at my computer.

I covered the computer, "Mine."

"Are you willing to fight for it, Judas Girl."

His grin irked me. The migraine and my own temper pushed me.

Bam. He skidded across the floor, keeping his feet.

I snapped, "You will leave my computer alone."

"Yes, fight me, hurry, Judas Girl!"

"Stop!"

I pulled back at Integra's command, seething.

"Alex, you are still recovering. Alucard, she can't give you a proper fight while a migraine keeps up and by forcing her to use her powers, the longer it will take for the migraine to ease."

He sighed, "Your orders, my master?"

"There was an incident in south London. Deal with the vampires, then return."

I leaned against the desk, the pain returning to the front of my mind. I was so weak to let a vamp push me into hurting myself more?

I was.

"You are pushing yourself too far, too fast, Alex."

I looked to Sir Integra, "I will do better in the future, sir."

"Answer your guild master and get some sleep. I expect you to eat on a proper schedule from now on."

"Yes, sir," I turned and answered my guild master.

I logged out and looked over at her. She was gone.

I crawled into bed and let the peace of dreams find me.


	4. Mistake of Old

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

Again looking for thoughts or critiques. Love to improve my own writing!

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Hands stroked my hips as a man whispered in my ear, some sweet nothings.

Then Alucard's voice intruded, "Wake up."

I jerked, my eyes going to his.

The look said it all. He knew what I'd been dreaming and it greatly amused him.

Then he straightened, "Sir Integra is summoning us both."

I got out of bed, sore but my head was clear. No headache.

Snagging my clothes, I straightened to quickly change behind the dressing screen.

"Not enough time."

"What?" I looked up in time to be swallowed by shadows.

Thump, I landed on my ass.

I shook my head in confusion.

"Alucard," Sir Integra snapped.

I was still in my tank top and pajamas. I flushed, scrambling to my feet.

Integra pointed to a side door, "Alex, go get decent."

"Yes, sir," I was in the room the next instant.

A storage room. I quickly dressed and folded my night clothes. Damn the vamp. Dumping me in Sir Integra's office without so much as a by you leave.

I stepped out, keeping my expression free of my thoughts.

Like somehow teleporting a certain vamp into sunlight. Would that hurt him? Would he shrivel and die?

"Alex, Alucard, you both are going to the countryside. Reports have come in on a vampire massacring families in a small farming community. Your orders are to make this vampire cease its attacks."

"Yes, my master."

"Certainly, Sir Integra."

"Alucard, get her weapons. She'll be on the roof shortly."

He vanished.

She pointed to the side desk. I set down my night clothes, heating a bit at how I'd been dumped here.

"This vampire has displayed powers similar to your own. Alucard will not care for the lives of humans. As a humanist you do. He silences the target. You shield the bystanders. Is this clear, Alex?"

"Yes, sir," a vamp with my type of powers. This wasn't good.

"Go with the blessing of her majesty."

"Yes, sir!" I saluted and turned.

"Also, don't get between Alucard and the target. He won't stop."

"Why would I get between them, sir?"

She didn't answer, only puffed on her cigar.

I strode out, shutting the door.

"Roof?" I looked both ways deciding on where to start.

The butler slid out of a shadow, "This way, ma'am."

On the roof was a helicopter already whirring to go.

Alucard was sitting across the open door, his long legs a barrier to entering in a normal manner. Well, childish pranks or fighting? I'd settle for the pranks even if some of them bordered on heart attacks.

"Let me guess, one door," I looked to the butler.

"Yes, ma'am."

I crouched so I was under the blades when I reached the door, holding onto my Hellsing hat while I started forward. Once there I looked at him.

"May I join you, Mister Alucard?"

He only smirked.

Using a move I'd seen from Anderson, I vaulted over his legs into the seat beside him. Nice it worked.

He frowned at me. Probably disappointed that I outmaneuvered him or I hadn't folded like a fragile flower.

I pulled on a headset and secured myself.

"We'll be at the site in thirty minutes, sir, ma'am."

I nodded, "Acknowledged."

The copter lifted, tilted.

I watched the ground flash by. What had Sir Integra meant by don't interfere? That seemed to say I couldn't be trusted. Why would I help a vamp other than Alucard?

I would help Alucard? Good grief. I had to be going as bonkers as him.

We landed a few miles away from the target area.

Alucard vanished.

"No way to keep up with him," I unbuckled, set the headset down, "My thanks for the ride, sir."

The pilot waved as I got out.

I scrambled to the trees.

Then I went towards town.

I was vampire bait if Alucard did not destroy the target.

"Human, human in the fight, standing in the starlight," I murmured.

There was only silence.

Were there any survivors?

"Oooooh."

The sound raked my spine.

People shuffled out of the buildings. No. I felt nothing from them. No emotion. Were these ghouls?

"What a pretty wench."

Blood, lust, sadism.

I looked to the speaker, scowled. This was Alucard's fight.

"I'm not a wench."

The vamp was experienced and something bugged me about him. He was too contained for this type of attack.

Another.

I dodged aside. Claws swiped through where I had been.

A face I never thought to see again snarled at me.

Eyes the same color of blue-green as mine. His hair was a couple shades darker, more towards black than my own dark brunette.

No. Not Jeremy. Not my older brother.

The ghouls closed with us, forming a circle.

"Go on, J. Drink the blood of this wench. Another ghoul will be perfect for when the Hellsing pet arrives."

Jeremy, my brother. Sir Integra must have known. I didn't want to fight him. All human life was precious.

We both considered the other.

"Do I know you?" Jeremy growled.

Rage pumped my heart. Anderson should have dealt with this. This vamp shouldn't have been allowed to grow this strong. Not helping the older one.

"Strike her with your powers, J."

I threw up a shield, deflected the attack at the second vamp. He leapt aside but all the ghouls to the end of the street went to dust. I swallowed. I had to go offensive if I was to live through this.

"How?" J stumbled back.

"Paladin, how useless you really are!" I slashed, at the vamp, cursing Anderson for this visual demonstration of his broken word.

J ducked flat to the ground barely escaping death by decapitation.

"Paladin? Father Anderson? How do you know him?" J straightened. I sensed his shield come up. Only it was for a mental slash. Not physical damage.

My voice deepened to match Anderson's, "Dust to dust, Amen," my hand threw the blade.

"Alex?" his expression was shocked.

My knife burrowed into his chest before he could move. He coughed, "You would destroy your own brother?"

I used my power to shove the knife deeper. His expression was horrified as he turned to dust. I guess I would and had. Live. Had to get out of this. The other vamp.

I turned back to the main vamp.

He backed up, paled, "Girl, I was only helping him to gain control."

"No, you are allies with the one who turned him," my heart shattered as I thought of what I'd done. I'd killed my own brother.

"Yes, dearie," a new voice taunted, "We did."

The whole group? I remembered three vamps. Not the one ahead of me so there had to be three more in the area.

"Hellsing's pet won't save you."

I laughed, sounding broken, "Save me? The Paladin didn't! Hellsing's pet won't! No male saves me."

I ducked a grab, anger exploding inside, mixing with the acid of murder.

If Anderson had protected us like he promised, I wouldn't have had to kill the creature made from my own brother.

My leg snapped out enhanced, shattering the jaw of the vamp who had tried to grab me. The crunch sickened me snapped something inside. Was I going to kill these vamps? What of my mission? Was I still human? Did I still have my own self or had I shattered and been scattered to the winds.

Loneliness, cold, wet, Mother?

A child's simple emotions.

A survivor!

Complete the mission. I enhanced my whole body.

I tumbled past the legs of the ghouls and vamps, launching over the wreckage of a car. I flew across the ground. I had to get to the child before these monsters!

"Get her!"

I sprinted away from them, throwing objects at them, slowing them.

I slid into a door, twisting around and over as it collapsed from my weight and speed.

Close. I was close to the child.

I raced up the stairs, hearing the ghouls moaning behind me.

If I saved one in all of this, then I had completed my mission. Even if I'd lost myself along the way.

I heard the wails, knew the vamps would hear them better than me.

I flung a wall all around the room, sealing it from the undead. I was hoping that I would be able to pass through quickly, sheltered from ghouls.

Pain lashed my mind as multiple blows rained on my walls from the outside. Vamps trying their strength against me.

Then I was flying through my walls, stumbling to a stop in the middle of the room.

A cradle lay amongst a scheme painted for a boy.

I panted as I looked in on the baby.

Alive. Whole. Untouched.

"You can't hold us out all night, Paladin's child."

My teeth bared as I looked at the vamps clinging to the outside.

"I will not fail my mission!" It was all I had now. All I could do. I needed help away from these damn things!

I took up the baby, surprised by how heavy he was.

Warmth, comfort, mother?

Tears pricked my eyes, knowing that his mother would never hug him again. Sing to him.

Cut off from your family by death and blood. For all I knew his mother was among the ghouls.

Blam, blam, boom!

Three of the leering faces vanished in sprays of ashes.

I looked to the wall of ghouls in the doorway, pressing heavily against my walls. It felt like Alucard was hitting me. I couldn't keep it up.

I had no choice. I had to leave the fight or die here with the child.

Emotions of bloodthirsty vamps were the only ones now in the area, including Alucard's unique signature of desire, war and creativity.

I covered the child and let the pages take us away, the words of the english language surrounding, shielding.

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I cradled the child, hoping my own heart was as close to me. I had used my powers to slay my own brother. Did I have that right? Was it right? I never thought of self-defense but this felt like murder. A murder in my heart, for he had been dear to me. A protector, confident, friend. I had been helpless the first time and now with all my power I couldn't save my own family.

The pilot flew me back on Sir Integra's orders, seemingly to rush as if afraid of Alucard's rampage at our backs. At least the vampire could find his own way home.

Wet.

I looked down into the trusting eyes of the baby. The next generation.

"I'll see if I can get you a new diaper," I promised him, "Then you'll be dry, k?"

I had to keep moving forward. Had to forget that I had to kill my own brother.

Was this how the Paladin felt? Had he known what it would be like to murder his kin? Was that why he didn't hunt down the vamps who had attacked my family? Why I had to face the results of his broken word? Was it my problem as the next generation, to handle the mistakes of the old?

A tiny hand wrapped my thumb.

"So trusting. I wish I could be too, little one."

We landed.

I waited for the pilot to help me out of the harness.

I stepped out, my eyes going to Sir Integra.

The butler held out his hands, "I'll take care of him while you make your report."

I handed him over gently.

I took a step away as Sir Integra turned to the doorway.

"Ahhhh, aaah!"

I blinked, looked at the child.

"Shhh," I whispered.

The child went quiet, eyes turning happy.

I smiled.

Then I strode after Sir Integra.

We arrived too quickly at her office.

"What happened?"

"Alucard vanished so I approached the town. The ghouls arrived first on scene, followed by two vampires. The elder ordered the younger to make me a ghoul, though I doubt they could tell I was a virgin. The younger attacked with powers same as mine."

"Alucard was to silence the targets."

"He was not there. And you tied my hands by not saying the vampire was my brother."

She blinked, "What?"

"That is why you warned me not the come between them, no?"

She puffed on her cigar, "Your brother? No, I ordered it so that you wouldn't be stupid and try to save them."

"You don't need to fear that anymore. I killed the one that had been my brother. At that point at least one other vamp arrived. I sensed the baby, the only one I found in the area. I retreated to retrieve the child and allow Alucard free access to the targets. When I secured the child, Alucard silenced three of them. I paged myself and the child out of there."

She considered me, "How does that make you feel?"

"Saving the child was the right thing to do. Alucard's job was to kill them, mine was to save the humans that I could."

"Killing your brother?"

"If I had belief in a deity, this is where I'd have a religious crisis of faith. I feel ill for having to do it, and in the end I think that I did right. The family angle is harder to accept."

"You did the right thing. You took out a vampire who had used his powers to kill."

"I hope in time I can see it that way, but I know a piece of what makes me human has gone missing this day."

She nodded, "I'll have William take the child to an orphanage. Please go get some rest, Alex."

"A good orphanage, Sir?"

She smiled, "You are still human, Alex, if you can still show concern for a child."

"I wished that we had gotten there sooner so that child would still have his mother."

"Dismissed, Alex. Sleep before Alucard comes back."

I nodded, leaving her behind.

Need crawled inside me for warmth, companionship, but I knew it was useless. No one here would understand. In fact I was worried that they'd look upon me in disgust.

I decided the best thing would be for me to sleep, undisturbed, as long as Alucard stayed out tonight.


	5. To Be Human

Good day all! Another chapter. I had to rework this twice until I liked it.

In response to a review, yes I too am a humanist. Each person's decision makes up the results that occur. Imagine one person watching a pichinko machine which represents one person's decisions. We make thousands on a daily basis. Then multiply that by 6 billion. How could any deity intervene in all lives when those little balls bounce every which way, sometimes colliding with 'other persons' decisions.

We also have a helping of the natural events around us like storms and earthquakes.

If you subscribe to chaos theory where a butterfly's wings causes a storm in another part of the world, then what does our daily movements, actions, and even our breaths result in? The hurricane that ravages the coast would then be the result of millions breathing at the right moment.

Scary thought.

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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William, the butler, let me know that the baby had been cleaned up, dried and was now sleeping peacefully. He even let me know which orphanage he was sending him to. When Integra said good, I never suspected she meant the best in the business. If I had a child and the capital to put them up for adoption, they were the ones I'd go to.

Going almost the length of the house again, I descended to Alucard's room.

He wasn't back yet as the room was silent. Or he was playing games with me.

I closed the door, went to my bed and sat.

I pulled my pillow into my arms to squeeze it for a moment.

Wetness trailed down my face startling me. Tears.

"I guess I am still human," I burrowed my face into the softness, "But how much have I sacrificed tonight?"

My arms tightened on the pillow.

The vamps had taken my family, either by killing or turning. My mother and father ripped to scraps of flesh. If they had been bitten they would have been ghouls. Jeremy becoming a vamp and killing at their behest.

What of the youngest? I barely remembered his face anymore.

He had been a baby, not yet a year old.

Had he been turned too?

I sobbed, rocking. Were there vamp babies? No god would be so cruel. Only humans would think of that as punishment or entertainment. If only I could blame a deity, but I didn't believe in them.

One person's actions could have saved them this pain. Anderson. Of course if I had had the same powers I do now, I would have stopped them. I was still weak. Frail.

"Crying over a scum vampire? How pitiful."

Alucard.

Not even a few moments to sort out my head.

"It may be easy for you to kill your kin but it is not for me."

"Weak. You are a coward, Judas Girl. That vampire had nothing that would have stopped you. He wasn't worth dealing with."

On switch: moping, crying, grief filled. Off: Anger, rage, and underneath it all pain.

A red haze descended over my vision. He had watched! Let me walk into that blind and to...

I think Alucard finally got that he had overstepped when I tore him to pieces with my power. Limbs flew, blood sprayed, and gore slithered across the floor from the violence. A voice at the back of my head screamed that I was hurting myself, killing what I had left.

Arms went around me, Seras soothing, "He isn't the one who turned your brother."

"Alucard?" Sir Integra's voice another touch of restraint on my temper.

He regenerated, turning to liquid blood first before reappearing in his immaculate vest and coat. He rolled his neck, "I want more. Let her go, Police Girl."

"Belay that Police Girl. Hold Alex until she has come out of her grief."

"Why should we pamper her need for comfort?"

I watched Sir Integra reach out and slap him.

A bitch slap. I blinked, the embers starting to die inside my heart.

"If you had done your job, Alucard, Alex would never have found out her brother had been turned. She would have believed him torn to bits as her parents had."

He looked stunned by this. He hadn't known about my brother either. Just like me.

"Seras, you can let me go," my voice was surprisingly calm and mannered.

She released me slowly.

"Sir Integra?"

"Alex?"

"May I be relocated," I began.

"Running away now?"

"I need some private place, Sir Integra. This day has unsettled me and I do not wish to hurt others. Only Alucard could survive it."

"Denied. You are on a high-trigger right now. Even with Alucard's tendency to have no sympathy, he is the safest one to be around for you."

I turned back to my bed, sat on it, "As you wish, Sir Integra."

She had valid points. With someone like me I could easily smack a human and instantly kill them.

I wasn't human.

Had I ever been human? With these powers was I ever simply human? I had been made outcast by the vamps and the institutions, yet I was born with these abilities, these powers that could so easily make a waste of unique life.

"Alex, I will need your written report from the mission. One hour."

I looked up at her, feeling empty, devoid of anything but a numb feeling that I wasn't sure I wanted to go away. If I had an accounting sheet of the bits of me that had been destroyed this night, I would likely ask to be sent to an institution until the end of my days.

"Yes, sir."

She swept out, satisfied with my answer.

I went to my desk and began my report.

**Name of reporter: Alex Jones-Jordan**

**Section: To be determined**

**Rank: Civilian**

**Mission: Secure humans in target area and defend against enemies**

**Location of mission: Southgate Farming Community**

**Ghouls slain: Approximately 30**

I frowned at that. Normally I'd have near perfect recall, but this once, I couldn't count them. As if my head was fuzzing the whole thing to keep me sane. I sure hoped it worked.

**Vampires slain: 1**

**Causalities: Civilians prior to arrival unknown. Team had none to report**

**Details:**

I wrote out what had transpired. The first draft sounded whiny, emotional, grief-stricken. I cut it out, set it in another document. To restart. I had to inhale, try to detach myself from the past. It wouldn't help to linger in it. I survived. I ensured the survival of countless civilian lives. These vamps would not prey on humans unaware of their existence.

Why had they known I was Anderson's get?

I looked to the wall. I didn't know at the time of Jeremy's...death. Yet Jeremy did? Did he know prior to the vampire attack or was he enlightened later?

I retyped the report with that question in mind. It was foreseeable that Jeremy knew and told them, but something was off.

Now Sir Integra had something to maybe go investigate.

Like why such a large group dared to come to England. From what I'd seen, Alucard and Seras kept the rabble to the minimum and frequently dealt with those who are problems. Alucard protecting his vast territory. Seras probably because she still believed in helping people.

Too close for comfort. My brother, that large of a group, Alucard distracted, even if the stupid bloodsucker had been nearby.

I had to get it together. I had to be strong. I wasn't going to break down. There was no higher power that was going to help me. I could only help myself.

"You are as weak as those that believe."

I whirled to Alucard, coming out of the chair so fast it shot away from my desk. I was sick of him and his mightier than thou snot-nosed attitude, "At least I am not a stupid egotistical vamp who can't get it up!"

There was the tensed silence on that. Okay, I was betting I'd gone too far now. No man took having his manhood questioned well, even vamps.

His grin widened and his eyes swirled with red when his glasses slid down.

The terrible feeling hell was about to be unleashed on my small section of Earth increased.

"Oh really?"

I decided being stupid was okay as I couldn't make this any worse, "Those who display the violence you do are often the ones who can't perform well in other areas."

He slowly approached, radiating an aura of a stalking lion towards a disabled gazelle.

I stood firm against him. Not the gazelle. I would be only a little cub lioness but not a prey animal.

His hands braced on the desk, thudding into the wood.

My body jerked at the feeling of power he was emitting, while he grinned at the same time. My heart thudded. I could feel my face heating as he pressed against me. Well he had something that felt like operable equipment.

"With someone who can heal when he's torn to bits, how can I trust that you aren't controlling yourself really well," did I sound that husky? Drat. I was not allowing my hormones to fucked this up.

He smirked, "I choose not to...perform that way. Besides, you are a virgin and they are much harder breed to find these days," his lips brushed mine.

My body tensed.

"I am willing to wait until after you are a draculina. Other men are not so contained."

His lips covered mine.

I felt his teeth cut my lips. I jerked back. His tongue came out. What the devil! It was long. Drat, KISS would love to claim a tongue that long.

He lapped at my lips, his eyes brightening.

I couldn't move, a small part of me enjoying the attention. I hadn't been the girl the men all wanted to date. My ideology and brains made them run the other way.

"You weren't lying about being a virgin," he smiled.

I shoved him away with my mind and arms. He skidded a few moments, then stopped.

His laughter rang, manic, terrifying.

"Sir Integra must have the same patience as nature has when weathering mountains."

He frowned at that, "Don't you mean the patience of a saint?"

"Saints are mortals. Nature though inanimate has to work eternally to wear down a mountain."

He chuckled, "I will enjoy the day I can fight you at full power."

Oh yeah, that made so much sense. He was toying with me. Trying to see if I made the cut. He was a hunter with no prey worth his time. Perpetually bored. Well if he wasn't such a stuck up prick, he might find some entertainment in mundane things as obviously he hadn't in his deprived years.

And me. I needed to get out more. If Alucard was turning me on, I so had to find someone else. Since the men on base were off limits, maybe I could request a night off to investigate local night spots.

I so hoped it worked. A local Atheist or Humanist chapter? They were usually very small and close knit. Most believers scorned us. Sometimes they even went out of their way to hurt us.

I personally knew a couple who had been kicked out of their flat, well in America it was called an apartment, only because their neighbors were heavy religious nutcases. They didn't want their children associated with someone who had no morals imposed by an invisible intangible being. The only moral people were those who had to have their morales imposed upon them by a deity and its holy men. How stupid. If that was the case no one would riot. Police and military keep people in line and honest.

"I doubt that I'll last long enough when you do unleash your full power on me. If what you have shown to date is any indication, you could cover the world in death."

He frowned, "Weak woman."

Then he faded away.

Stupid ass vamp.

Printing the report I took it upstairs. William could let me know where I'd need to drop it off in time for Sir Integra. Another benefit was the vamp would not be bugging me for a while. Well I hoped anyway.


	6. Firearms and Men

Good day all!

Still looking for reviews. Even if its on believability of the story, how Alucard and the others are portrayed. Questions are welcomed to.

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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William directed me to a shelving unit that all the men dropped their reports off in. My last name had been added to the bottom.

Duty done, I decided a walk outside would do.

Clear the mind.

The instant I was outside, a breeze ruffled my hair.

This was heaven on earth. Why would anyone give this up for a stupid pair of wings, a harp and clouds? I think they'd be bored. Everything easily in reach. You want to win every time, bam you do. Where's the fun in that?

I ended up sitting on a low wall behind the firing boxes for the gun range.

Currently, I was the sole person outside.

Must be the night, I guess. I was a strange outside-loving individual.

At this point I suspected a person would be tempted to hit up a priest for a little sit down after all that had gone on. Hmm. Humanists go to psychologists? I so wasn't going anywhere near the Catholics. If they caught wind of me approaching one of their confessional boxes then Anderson would show up and...wait he already showed up and been an asshat. Whew no worries then. Still I needed someone to talk to. Not a certain vamp who had an annoying habit of vanishing.

"Hey, Alex."

I looked over. Captain Sonny and his men were approaching.

"Good evening," I greeted, "Do I need to vacate so you can break the night's silence?"

"You are going to be helping."

"Oh?" I would actually be training with guns?

Back in America I had wanted to get training but the only gun range in the area required membership for ten years and a training class just to use their range. Civilians were not taught firearms. I guess they thought a rebellion was in the works so the government made it impossible to get the permits to get the training to get the permits. Ugh, I hated chicken and egg problems masked under red tape.

"Don't I need a permit to operate firearms?"

"How could you forget," he held out a small sheaf of papers, "that you are permitted."

I laughed taking the stack, reading over them, "Silly me to forget what I never knew."

Sonny smiled when I glanced up. This is what I wanted. A normal human to spend my time with. Not some sexy...I so didn't think that.

"Let's get you started on the primary weapons."

I got off the wall and padded over to them.

"Where are your shoes?"

I looked down, then colored.

"I'm use to walking around bare foot," I was so a domesticated woman. Now all I needed was the be pregnant.

Stereotypical.

The men laughed.

I smiled, "At least I can run without shoes unlike you pampered boys."

"Really?"

Sonny lunged after me.

I dodged, scampered upon the wall and ran along it.

"Doesn't that hurt?"

I looked to ensign Mel, "Does it hurt to play the guitar by your fingertips?"

I leapt over Sonny's reaching hands, landed and danced away.

"I have callouses, and how did you know?"

"My feet have them too," I whirled out of the way of Sonny again, "also I heard you playing yesterday I think. Quite lovely."

"I'll get you one of these days!" Sonny smiled.

"And my little dog too?"

Laughter erupted from the men.

"Okay," Sonny bowed, "I admit defeat to the humanist. Shall we continue with today's lesson?"

"Yes, please!"

I bounced over to one of the boxes. Then I was grabbed from behind. If only it had been under normal circumstances, with a lover. Drat! My head was so messed up.

"Gotcha!"

I kicked Sonny in the shin, "You surrendered!" I wiggled free to the laughter of the men.

He rubbed where my blow landed, "I win."

"Nope, once surrendered you can't win."

"Then you aren't fighting Hellsing style," he smirked.

"Oh?"

"Guns first, wrestling later, as long as it involves mud," Mel chirped happily.

"Ensign Mel, I would love to see you in the mud," I smirked, "But I am not getting anywhere near a puddle."

They teased the unfortunate ensign while Sonny was laying out weapons.

"Play aside, Hellsing operatives use various guns in our missions. The first is the shotgun," Sonny pointed to the largest guns on the end.

"Both are loaded for blowing a hole through a head or heart."

"She won't be needing those pale imitations."

I turned to face Alucard.

"What do you mean, Alucard? She's being given standard issue," Sonny sounded very put out.

Gritting my teeth, I looked between the two. Was this some silly male dominance to who got most of my time?

"Miss Jones-Jordan, my apologies. I had hoped to bring you this before your training."

"What do you mean William?" my curiosity was coming to the fore as I looked to the rushing butler.

He was carrying a case inscribed with the Hellsing logo.

"This is your new weapon," he set the case down, "As you can enhance your strength to deal damage to undead to the point it breaks bones, you should be able to handle this."

He opened the case, turned it so I could look in on my new...gun. Hmm. That looked too familiar.

"Human's Fate, a smaller version of Alucard's Casull. Not as powerful but works on ghouls and low level vampires."

Boom.

I jumped, my wide eyes noting that all the men leapt vertically too.

Alucard was holding his black gun, grinning at a completely decimated target.

"Let's see how powerful, Judas Girl. Compared to my Jackel."

I scowled at him. He was like a little child now. He wanted to have a competition and win. William just said he would.

How childlike in mind, yet a body of a god.

Drat! Bad Alex. Don't go there.

"Ammunition type?" I asked hoping I could ignore Alucard and what had to be rampaging hormones.

"Silver, blessed already," I raised an eyebrow at that but didn't say anything, "Mercury charged. These will killed humans."

So don't point at anything you want to live.

"Yours holds thirteen rounds as the bullets are smaller, but the clip is the same size as Alucard's. The recoil could easily break human bones. For you, with enhanced strength, you'll be able to handle it fine."

I gripped the gun, gently pulled it out, "Hefty."

"Its five kilos. Alucard's is ten kilos including clip."

Smaller, lighter. Hmm, I am sensing a theme here. I'm smaller and most likely lighter than Alucard.

"You really expect her to handle something like that? She has the strength of a human," Sonny started in as if to help me. It only served to piss me off. He assumed that I didn't have the power because I didn't use it on him.

My restraint was becoming my downfall.

Inhaling before I let the thought take hold, I took up a cartridge, walked to a booth.

Setting both weapon and cartridge, I focused on enhancing strength to my bones, my muscles, my very being. I did it for every part of me.

"She praying?"

"Nah, she's a humanist. She's just being silly."

"Ha, humanist, such a crock. She's just denying that she believes in God."

"Right. You going to convert her back to the path?"

"Twenty that she's fibbing on being a non-believer."

I had heard all that before. Hearing it though downgraded the men in my view. How close-minded.

"So she doesn't believe in any gods. Do you believe in Ra? Allah? Buddha? Odin?" Sony's voice cut in, "As I'm seeing head shakes, then you are technically atheists in regards to all of those deities. You are closer to what she is. She's just taken it one step further."

"I'm not an atheist!"

I opened my eyes, rolled them. I rolled my shoulders, reveling in the strength, before lifting the gun. It felt light now.

I examined the cartridge, noting the silver tips to the bullets. I slid the cartridge in, smacked it to seat it.

Pointing at the target, I flicked the safety to off. Aiming, I slowly pulled the trigger.

I felt no recoil as the gun kicked up. I safetied the gun, noting I'd hit the groin of the target.

There was silence for a moment. Then maniacal laughter.

Alucard.

Sonny came up, "Stance," he cleared his throat as he sounded a bit nervous, "We'll work on your stance, then aiming."

His hand reached out for my wrist.

A white glove with black markings beat him.

"The gun is not like yours, Captain."

Alucard let go, towered over Sonny. Sonny straightened, glaring at the vamp.

I set my eyes on Alucard, frowning. Yep. Male pissing match over me.

Some females would be flattered. I was getting majorly annoyed.

Before, I couldn't get a man to look at me in any interest, and now I had two that were about to do the equivalent to bison ramming heads.

"Ensign Mel," I said coldly, "As these two gentlemen are too busy to realize I am not impressed by chauvinistic displays, would you come over and teach while they get it out of their system."

Neither of the two men heard me as they faced off. Mel chuckled softly, before coming over, whispering instructions as the tension mounted at my back.

I aimed with his instructions in mind, clicked the safety and pulled the trigger.

The heart and shoulder of the target blew apart.

"What?" Sonny shouted.

I aimed for the head. It followed the rest of the bits.

Turning slightly, I took the head and heart of five more targets.

I released the clip, set it aside, safetied the gun, laid it down.

My face was harsh when I faced the two ram-men, "Seems in this regard Ensign Mel completed the mission assigned. I'm sure Sir Integra will be displeased," I faced Mel, "I will convey your assistance in this matter."

He responded stonily, "I am only helping a fellow teammate. Rather excellent shots, Miss Jones-Jordan."

Taking up both items I went back to William, "My appreciation, William. Is the cleaning care incorporated in this case?"

"Yes, ma'am. Your next reports will require ammo used in the course of your duties. I will be resupplying you as you use it."

I set the gun and cartridge into the case, pressing so it laid correctly, before closing the case and latching it shut, "This is to be in the armory or with me in my room, sir?"

"Sir Integra's orders are to have this weapon in your room."

I took the case by the handle, "My thanks, William. I look forward to how it handles in the field."

Chuckles, eerie and insane sounded. I was amusing Alucard.

Lovely.

I walked off, carrying a weapon I hoped I could use in the field as aptly as I had on the range, bare foot with two men behind me thinking both had a right to me.

"Alex?"

I turned to face Sonny, "Captain mrph."

He kissed me, hands at my nape to hold me still.

I reacted, kneeing him in the groin.

He collapsed clutching his family jewels all to the laughter of the men.

"Don't do that again," My growl was deep and snarling. I couldn't control the vamp, but I could the human.

"Ow, but I got my reward," he grinned though his voice was higher, "and I caught you."

"Grrr," I snapped before continuing on my way, "Bloody hyper horny men."

I turned the corner, preparing to get sleep provided the vamp did not intervene.

My nose met a too familiar black vest and looped tie.

My eyes rose to Alucard's. What was he doing now?

I backed up, "I'm not doing another fight nor test, Alucard."

He looked over at the men with a strange grin. What the hell was going on? I followed his gaze.

The captain paled. What the hell was Alucard doing?

I turned to state I was able to handle myself.

Alucard got a kiss too.

And the same attack.

Except the blow never hit. He vanished, laughing.

"Just cause I'm a humanist doesn't mean I give free kisses!" I fumed.

Human laughter brought my gaze back to the men. I glared, thinking about how I'd torture them. Instant silence.

"Anyone else want a try?"

"No, ma'am," they chorused, except Sonny who was scowling.

Snorting, I strode angrily into the manor, "Damn vamp. Expects to get everything his way."

His laughter chased me.


	7. Norse and Them

Good day all!

Still looking for reviews. Even if its on believability of the story, how Alucard and the others are portrayed. Questions are welcomed to.

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian". All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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"What prompted you to the belief there are no gods?"

Mel was sitting on the entertainment room's only couch when I entered with the intention of watching an old monster movie after I'd woken from my sleep.

I smiled, "Norse mythology actually."

"Odin? Thor? Them?"

"'Them' is the name of my monster movie," I showed him the DVD case.

He laughed, "So what about Norse Mythology convinced you there was no god?"

I popped the DVD into the player, "Well, to be frank it was the idea of finite good, to a finite heaven."

The player, a very old style whirred as it tried to read the disc.

"Please, enlighten me," Mel patted the seat next to him.

I sat, "They believed that you did good in this life, died in combat, then you reached Valhalla. But Valhalla would fall when the evil of the world came and began Ragnarock. A final battle when all existence would be wiped out. That those who managed to reach Valhalla would fail and be destroyed by evil. What person would want a heaven that ends? It makes sense though to have a finite heaven for a finite good life. I looked at the Christian heavens, all of the different versions and they all have the same theme. Finite good, you go to an infinite heaven. A finite bad, you go to hell for eternity and beyond."

"You detest the idea of being punished forever for one crime?"

"I think anyone does. Do you want to be punished for ogling another man's wife when you didn't know? Would the one small item you stole as a child be the single reason you will never go to heaven? That sickened me. The Norse one made more sense to me, yet its called mythology. The Bible is nothing more than contradictions and infinities for finite actions. So I came to the conclusion it was all mythology. If it was that, then what was the truth? I look at this world, its beauty, its grace and I can't see why anyone would want to give it up for a chance at wings and a boring harp."

"Boring?" he laughed.

"Think on it. Heaven you get all you want. So if you are a gambler, you'd win every hand, every pot, every roll of the dice. That's...boring. It is almost hell in that regard."

He was silent as the DVD finally started the movie.

He snorted, "Black and white?"

"Yep. It was a good movie. I watch it now and again to remind myself that things have gotten better. Women are not treated as voiceless property," in spite of one vamp's attitude, "men of all creeds can apply for work if they have the experience or inclination. We have better entertainment now like Blu-ray DVD," he chuckled at that one, "Our education is handled, well in America, so that anyone can go and learn. I do wish they wouldn't do the silly 'in God' in the pledge or anything else that violates Church and State separation."

"Like?"

"My school actually banned books that promoted atheism, secularism or humanism. They thought that they would be bad influences. It was like them banning the Harry Potter series for promoting witchcraft and devil worship. That is not what I want for my society. We should read and make our own decisions. I've read countless books, including three different versions of the Bible and two of the Koran. I've read beautiful texts from people who believe in aliens making our world that rival the Bible, and seem to have fewer contradictions and such."

"So you came to the belief," he stopped at my expression, "What?"

"I don't believe. Belief is blind faith that something happens, and is very hard to shake with reason and truth. I prefer ideologies or ideas if you must."

"Ideas can be changed?" he smiled wryly.

I nodded, "Correct."

Bam.

I was standing, facing the door.

Alucard grinned, the door swinging, "Good evening."

He slowly stalked into the room, the aura of eminent danger swallowing the nice feel talking with Mel had produced.

Was he jealous of any man now?

Mel gulped, "I just remembered a wrestling match with Jon. Please excuse me."

He left the room at a trot as I heard the movie sound with the plane flying into the scene with music.

Alucard leered as he approached, "Looking nice for the men?"

I looked down, "This is my normal wear before coming here."

I had on a tank top that said, "For the Horde," across the front, and a utilikilt. I so hated skirts that I had permanently been converted into a cross-dressing kilt wearer. Men wear kilts traditionally and women were called the cross-dressers. I was proud of it.

"Showing off you legs, chest and arms."

I frowned trying to see what he meant, "My uniform makes my legs into two long miles, my chest rather busty in spite I am nowhere near Seras' pair, and my arms look rather shapely. This makes me look as I am, so how in the world do you come up with me dressing up for the men? This is dressing for a casual evening, unlike you."

Integra walked in behind him as Alucard morphed his clothes.

My jaw dropped and Integra choked on her cigar.

I covered my eyes, "Good grief."

He had changed into tight jeans, the brand new type that men can't keep that way for more than ten minutes but look high-class at the time, button down shirt a la a pirate movie captain and kept the knee high boots. My hormones were doing little dances saying "he is so fine, take him with wine!" over and over again.

Integra snapped, "Alucard, what in her majesty's name are you doing!" she sounded put out again. At least I wasn't the only one affected by this vision.

"Proving a point."

"No, you are proving that your casual is so fucking higher class than mine," I whipped my hand off my eyes, "My kilt has stains from oil and wood varnish, my top has holes from overuse and I not some tall guy in a pirate outfit. So what the hell would any man see other than I'm ordinary? Hmm?"

He gritted his teeth, "The men like the oil and varnish look as it means you play in their court occasionally, the holes are just a little too far from where they would love to see it and you look like a gypsy."

"A gypsy! I'm not wearing the bloody blouse nor vest! That's in my halloween box," I fumed. I wasn't some little mystical person with magic. I did wish I had a wicked blade right then.

"Alucard, change back to your uniform," Integra snarled, "Alex is more than welcome to wear her items of clothing as she is not expected to look like William, you nor I."

"You don't like this look?" he turned his body on to Sir Integra. She froze. I was guessing she had only seen the back and side. Now she had the full frontal. I had the back. Did he always have a nice ass? Oh crap! I shook my head. Out you blasted sexual thoughts.

She was speechless.

In fact, Alucard had to catch her cigar as she was stunned numb. He crushed it out.

"What is happening in here?" Sonny walked in, stopped dead, eyes wide, "Fuck!"

Alucard turned towards the captain, "Not here you don't."

I touched Integra's shoulder, "Sir? Sir!"

"Bloody vampire!" I felt relief as she regained her energy, "Get the hell back into your regular cloths this instant!"

He scowled but complied.

Good, now my brain was working better.

"I'm missing my movie," I sat on the couch, "and a good conversation. Thanks for ruining a good philosophical debate, Alucard," I was angry now. Not just at me. No, he had ruined MY fun and entertainment.

Sonny went to sit on the couch.

"Both of you leave me the hell alone!" I pointed at Sonny, "You go do whatever you do with your men. The vamp can go elsewhere. I want a bloody night limited to second and lower in the pack members of the male gender."

"Alucard, you have a mission, Sonny go with him."

"Yes sir!"

"My master," the dark tone was rich as chocolate.

Damn him.

Several moments passed.

Integra sat down next to me, "He did that because of your outfit?"

"I think he should stay the fuck out of the men's heads. The only one pushing his luck I've put in his place."

She chuckled, "Very nice follow through with the knee by the way."

"Thank you. It really should have punched them all the way up his throat in hindsight."

Integra lit up another cigar which made me concerned, "You light up a bit too much, sir, if you do not mind my impertinence."

"It's my way of dealing with Alucard," she exhaled the foul smelling smoke, "After today I may have to up it. He's found a new way to irritate me."

"And me. I was so having fun discussing norse mythology and world views with Ensign Mel."

"Oh?"

"He started it, asking how I came to the idea that there are no gods, goddesses, devils nor demons."

"Alucard broke in on this?"

"Slammed the door open. I bet he had been listening."

She watched the movie for a long time, "This is good."

"Most movies that survived from that time were the good ones. Plot, action, interesting concepts. To think a movie like this caused fear not too long ago."

"What are you guys watching?"

"Them!" I offered to Seras who was sipping from a blood packet, "A monster movie made in the fifties. I think its was 1954 or thereabouts."

She sat down, "Does it have vampires?"

"Nope!" I replied cheerfully.

"Could you, like, back it up?" she smiled sheepishly.

Sir Integra smiled, "Yes please."

I restarted the disc from the beginning.

"So why do you think most vampires do terrible things?"

Both Integra and I looked at Seras. She looked sad.

Integra sighed, "Boredom."

"Not all of them," I disagreed, "I think that some were so religious that they do horrible acts."

"Oh?" Integra sounded interested.

"I think that some of them are so deeply religious that when they become a vamp, something so damned in their beliefs, they realize they don't need to act good anymore. They are already so damned they are going to hell, might as well go all the way," I looked at their surprised expressions, "If a boy is told there is no Santa Claus then he has no incentive to act nicely for the year as the gifts are given by his parents, family and not by an ever-seeing jolly man. Its the same thing. There is no worse punishment so why not act as you please? Tear a family to bits? Can't be worse than being a vamp. Feast on the dying after your attack? Not worse than being a vamp."

"So what if you were to become a vamp?" Seras inquired.

I swallowed but the room didn't swim nor did I feel the need to defend myself. Hmm. Maybe I was discovering that being a vamp didn't mean one had to be a monster? Nah. Alucard proved that.

"As my morals come from my sense of right and wrong I think if the passage of time does not wear down my will, I could potentially stay on the right side, but as Shakespeare said, 'Who would bear the whips and scorns of time, the oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely, the pangs of despised love, the law's delay, the insolence of office and the spurns that patient merit of the unworthy takes.'"

"Wow," Seras gaped at me, "Are you a walking encyclopedia?"

"If Alucard had his way, I imagine I would be the vamp edition of it," I muttered.

"So for a time you could remain as you are?" Sir Integra restated.

"I think so. Again, I haven't gone through the process so I cannot say what would happen to my sense of self."

They thought on my words as we engrossed ourselves into the movie. I thought on how likely I would end up if the fear of turning didn't break me upon my waking after being bitten. My chances weren't good.


	8. Old dogs and new conflicts

Its been pointed out to me that Alucard would not feel the need to challenge a human for what he perceives as his. So there will be some changes coming down the line for previous chapters.

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Another mission.

Alucard was pleased as the report said the vamp was a truly old vampire. Apparently he thought this one was worthy prey. Me, I was staying the fuck out of his way, getting humans to safety from his glorified fight with the prey.

When we approached the area, Alucard did his vanishing act again. Faster to his entertainment. Sonny and his teams were approaching from the opposite side of the town from where I was situated to handle ghoul control.

Quietly, I approached, sneaking around, trying to sense any emotions.

Since beginning the fights with Alucard, my powers seemed to have strengthen, increase in accuracy.

Alucard was eager, excited, anticipatory.

Cool, calm, focused pulsed slowly from Sonny.

Mel...I smiled. It felt like when someone hears soft music, blue and sentimental. Not surprising considering he played a musical instrument well.

Bloodlust. It had to be the old vampire. To my left, a hundred meters. I couldn't sense his powers but his emotions pinpointed him as easily as younger vamps to me.

Though every now and again I felt other emotions mixed in with his. Both human and animal, almost as if he had multiple personality disorder. Yet the common emotions shared by all of them was death and hunger for flesh.

Swallowing, I extended out, searching for even a glimmer of a live human. All I could read were the Hellsings in the area.

Wait. My eyes narrowed on the distant hill. A person was approaching. Cool, calm, professional, unhurried. Do the job well and swiftly.

A hunter returning from a round with the local wildlife?

I paged to the opposite side of the street, probably looking like a stream of trash papers. Once I was solid again, I trotted up the street towards the point I could intercept the hunter.

I whispered into the headset, "I'm on my way to delay and divert a person incoming to the area. I can't read any other living being here."

"Affirmative. Coming from which direction?" Sony spoke confidently.

I checked my wrist compass, "Northeast."

"Double time it. Ghouls incoming from all directions."

Sprinting, I replied, "Acknowledged."

The first ghoul shambled around the corner of a cross street. Human's Fate retorted to this with a bang, blowing the head clean off. The ghoul dusted an instant later, splattering the last of it blood on the ground and a street sign.

Gunshots began to answer from the streets, Hellsing beginning the assault, exterminating the undead, shuffling or otherwise without distinction.

"How the hell long was he here? We have the streets overflowing with ghouls!" Sonny snapped angrily.

My legs burned as I ascended the hill, holstering Human's Fate. No point scaring the incoming civilian.

I had to get them out of here before they...wait a minute.

Recognizing the emotional signature, I stopped dead.

Anderson topped the hill several meters above me, his scowl dark and cold. His eyes scanned the far side of town before locking on me with a jerk of his head.

He stiffened.

Fear jolted through my system, readying me for battle.

Was this it? Where I would have to kill my last living relative?

His expression softened.

"Ah suppose at least yer fighting monsters," he grinned, his eyes returning to the town, most likely to where Alucard's guns were barking from, almost cannon-like in their voices.

"Um, Captain, Father Anderson is on scene," I swallowed backing up as two more cool professionals joined him, "with two others."

"What!"

I backed up slowly.

Father Anderson sighed, "Alex, ah am na here ta do anything ta ye. We are here for the monsters."

"We are handling the situation, Father Anderson," at Sonny's prompting I added, "besides this is not your jurisdiction to police."

One of his companions stepped forward as my senses warned me of approaching enemies, "Iz dat so?" he challenged.

"Yes, sir. We have the situation in hand," turning, I pulled my gun, shot twelve ghouls in succession, popped the clip, deposited the empty into a pouch, took another cartridge out, rammed it home before holstering the refreshed rig. I turned back to finish, "If you insist on being here, please take an observer role."

Anderson held out a hand to stop the one who had spoken from pushing forward, while the silent one weighed me.

"Survivors?" Anderson asked.

I rescanned, "None are alive here that didn't come in with either the Hellsing group or yourself, Father Anderson."

That saddened me. All the life this place should have, the myriad of emotions. All silent. Like I would be one day.

Blam. Blam! BLAM!

I whirled as the last shot sounded too close. A minute later the vamp landed in the field, a dozen meters from us.

He grinned, happy, "Vatican too! How delightful," he....he slopped off his skin to reveal three mangy dogs. All three rushed us.

My gun barked as I shot one in the head. It kept coming.

A wall went up between me and the beast barely in time. Pain nearly sent me unconscious as the dog flopped on the ground for a moment. The migraine spot appeared when my vision cleared.

"Damn you!" a new voice snapped.

I watched the silent man snarl the words again and drew a whip, lashing the third dog.

It knocked the coil aside, lunged forward. It chomped the priest into three pieces, the middle section swallowed by the dog the next instant.

The stench of perforated bowels hit my stomach, almost making me heave. I gritted, growling.

My opponent rushed again, laughing. I braced, reinforcing my wall with all my might.

I yelped, glaring at the dog who had rebounded again from my shield.

"Weak female. Pity I'll have to eat you," the dog charged again.

Pages suddenly struck the ground, pinned by knives. Not mine. The vamp howled, little jagged electricity arcs crossing his body.

Anderson snapped, "Ye monsters are na taking another."

"This is what you call a spiritual barrier?" I asked, rubbing my head and the aura widened.

"Aye, it is," he sneered at the vamp, "Ah suppose you are nothing monster. Weak in the face of god, son and the holy ghost."

"Amen," the last one with Anderson snarled.

I smirked, "By the collective will of humanity."

Anderson laughed, "Can ye na say amen?"

"Has too many religious connotations. What I said is more in tune with my ideology."

"Heathen," the man said.

"Hienkel," Anderson chided.

Both dogs were snapping at the edge of the barrier.

My aura covered the entirety of my right eye.

"Where is Alucard?" I sensed his lust and excitement.

"If you are waiting for your vampire pet, little Hellsing girl, he's dead."

Both priests stiffened in outrage. Seemed they wanted that honor. I merely replied with a raised eyebrow, "I don't think you dealt the death blow you assumed, vamp-pup."

"Pup?" he screamed from both dogs. Where was the third? Was it circling?

I glanced to the side. The third dog was pinned to the ground by bayonets, head laying separate from the neck.

Dead? Well, a point for Anderson, but he was down one for losing a man.

"Hienkel," Anderson grabbed and held his fellow priest, "we stay here."

"So you are going to follow the little Hellsing Heathen?" the dogs barked.

"I prefer Humanist, to heathen. Correct terms do wonders."

"Alex, what is happening?" Sonny commanded.

"The vamp made dogs of himself and attacked. One of the Vatican agents is dead, but a dog is down. Where is Alucard?"

"You need that pathetic vampire to help you, girl?" the vamp sneered.

"Don't know. We are pinned by ghouls. We need that target silenced now," Sonny shouted over gunfire that was echoing weakly to my ears.

Anderson's blades were blessed. He blessed the pages for his teleport whereas I used my own internal powers to imbue the teleport. Was it the same with all things?

I held my hand over the gun, whispering, "Blessings and reason are not mutually exclusive in this case. Both together force death," I forced my power into my gun, into the metal of every piece.

The migraine kicked up further, spreading to my other eye.

Anderson caught my arm, "Ye are pushing ta hard, Alex."

"Hienkel?" I blinked, "May I request your help to defeat the monsters?"

"Why?"

"Hienkel, do it. She did something ta her gun."

Grumbles then, "What da you need?"

"Archer's brace."

I barely saw the surprise through the wavering vision, "Dat's it?"

"Yes, sir."

The vamp dogs laughed, "Your weapons are blessed, little Hellsing. You can't harm me."

Hienkel came to my side, turned and offered his shoulder, "She is dis crazy?"

"Aye," Anderson laughed, "be quick as meh barrier is being destroyed by the monster."

I braced my arm on Hienkel's shoulder, grateful he was much closer to my height than Anderson. Two shots. Two kills. I aimed, sighting on their heads.

Blam, blam.

The first dog exploded into dust. The second yowled as its leg was blown off at the shoulder joint.

"Dratted migraine," I shook from the effort to stay upright and not let the agony put me down. The aura covered both eyes so I couldn't see anything.

"How did you do that you, fucking bitch?"

"She's Judas Girl to you god damn punk," Alucard's voice echoed, "Come on. We were fighting. Hurry and attack me!"

"Bastard, just die."

My right eye began to clear.

The vamp dog leapt to the left.

A bigger shape collided with him, causing both to fall to the ground. Snarls sounded. Two big nasty dogs.

"Ack," Hienkel gagged.

Blinking, I finally could pick out more detail.

A black dog with multiple glowing red spots was taking small chunks from the vamp dog. Taking his time. That had to be Alucard. It was taking too much pleasure in the feasting. I was glad to not be viewing it in great detail.

Pain was crashing into my head as the multi-eyed dog finally ended the smaller one by swallowing it whole.

It was gross even with me being half blind.

"Alex, lass, sit down."

I felt myself slowly getting to my knees. The cool grass tickled my legs where I was bare, which seemed surreal compared to the ugly head pains.

Little whines were filling the air.

"Dat is how she gets? Ha!"

The whines stopped when I snapped, "I can certainly give you a hint of how much this hurts."

"Oh yes," I heard Alucard purr, "make them bleed."

"Shut up ye damned monster!" Anderson shouted, driving a nail into my brain with the din.

"Alex?" Sonny's voice was gentle in my ear, "Take your pill. We'll be there shortly. Cover your ears, close your eyes. You can sleep in the equipment van. Its dark and mostly quiet."

"At least someone's thinking on me," I pulled the headset off, dry swallowed a pill, covered my ears against Anderson being egged on by Alucard.

I'm in a nice meadow, the new moon is shading the night just the sound of wind, no matter how much it sounds like two certain men. I inhaled, reiterated that I was alone in the field.

"Both of you need to be quieter. Alex is in pain and your arguing is only making it worse," Sonny's voice intruded, though it was more plea than command, "Sir Hienkel, would you be so kind to help me get her to the van? She needs a dark and quiet place to rest. Anderson, Alucard, if you wish to continue this do it in town. While you are at it look for some soda cans with caffeine in them. Coke or Dr. Pepper are the best."

"Humph, Anderson is the altar boy. He can fetch," I felt Alucard's emotions fade, so he must have done his vanishing act and moved away.

"Cowardly monster!"

I felt arms circle my shoulder, pull me upright, "Sir Hienkel, please."

"Dat iz a stupid weakness."

"But she did well no? She helped to save your lives. To protect those who weren't the enemy."

My eyes opened, noting that the aura was now only at the edge of my left eye. Once it was gone the real pain was going to hit.

Hienkel and Sonny got me to the van. As promised it was dark, quieter without both priest and vamp, plus there was even a comfy, long bench to lay on.

"Thank you, Sir Hienkel," I spoke gently once I was horizontal, "Will you and Father Anderson need a ride to the nearest town?"

"We don't need heathen help, nor gratitude. Dis changes nothing."

Mel's voice intruded, "I found a drink with caffeine but its orange."

"Will this work Alex?" I opened my eyes up at Sonny.

Shielding my eyes from the brutal light. Yep, orange soda.

I took it, popped the lid, lifted my body up enough to chug the contents.

"Alex, do you need more? Or are you good until we get you home?" Sonny was leaning in, eyes a bit too bright and excited. Did I work with oddballs?

Anderson scowled, "Her home is na with ye Hellsings."

"She iz a heathen. Why did you care for her?" Hienkel demanded in a tone that brooked ill things for those that did not obey him.

"Leave it, Hienkel," Anderson growled.

Tossing the empty can to Mel, I said clearly, "Father Anderson, I'm at home with Hellsing. If you want to talk further, look up my email address," I laid back down, "until then, let me be in peace," I closed my eyes, covering them with my arm.


	9. Words to the Backup

I'm still surprised by the lack of reviews. Well, we'll continue and hope for the best.

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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The trip back was only filled with nasty gnawing pain. The van rolled to a stop in what had to the garage.

I heard the doors open.

Then I smelled Sir Integra's cigar smoke. I peeked under my arm through the open doors. She was considering me.

"How many meals have you been having?"

"Four, sir," I slowly pushed myself to sitting, "with snacks."

We stared at each other for a long moment before she spoke, "You are going to five meals until further notice. I will not have my soldiers needing help from Iscariot," her voice dripped with disdain.

I flinched, gulping, "Yes, sir."

"Recover, then make your report," she walked away.

Wow. I felt like I'd been flayed on top of being hit in the head by a percussion band.

Slowly, I made my way to my bed.

Once there I collapsed across the comfortable length, kicking off my boots.

Dark, quiet, mild. Now to get some rest.

The bed shifted as someone placed a hand on the back of my head. It had to be Alucard. Seras was bouncy and noisy. William would never touch me, and Sir Integra would bark orders from the doorway.

"What did you do to your gun to deal that much damage?" he asked, his dark voice excited.

It also hurt my poor abused brain, "Can we talk when my head isn't feeling as if someone is splitting it open with a dull axe?"

"A bite, then you."

I rolled to my side, pushed him away, "Look, I have no interest in becoming what you are. Seras seems to be the exception but I've seen her changing into something that does not think for the health of humans."

He was a darker shadow against the darkness, "But you could cling to your humanity longer than any other."

"What I think and what is true are not necessarily the same thing, Alucard. You of all people know that. I embarrassed Sir Integra by being too weak to even shoot my own gun and had to have an Iscariot steady my arm. I thought I could take anything another vamp could dish out, but tonight has proven I am not anywhere close enough."

"You are closer than Police Girl. If she had been there in your place, she would be dead by Anderson or by the vampire-scum. That vampire was just below my level of power and skill. You survived."

"You are beginning to worry me. You are not this kind without an ulterior motive."

His boots rang on the stone, slowly approaching, "Giving up is what kills people. When that dog attacked you a second time, you decided the pain was an equitable trade for your life. You fought him when you knew he'd tear you gladly limb from limb," he towered over me, "You face me knowing I could turn around in an instant and tear out your throat."

"I either live or I cease to be Alucard. There is no heaven, no hell awaiting me. There is nothing worth dying for when a vamp is involved."

He paused, shook his head smirking, "You don't act like those religious fools."

"Duh, I'm a humanist. I do not have the comfort of a lie. The truth is that I will be gone. The energy in my body will decay; worms, germs, fungus, bacteria will break my body down and return the nutrients to the cycle. Everything that makes me myself will be gone. It makes me selfish. I have only one life to live. My mistakes and my triumphs are the only ones I will have. The stories I carry can only be passed down to family, friends. Once I am dead, my voice is silenced forever."

He laughed grinning insanely, "I love that. I think it would torture Judas Priest."

I sighed in annoyance, "So I'm a potential draculina, a dog toy, or a running joke against Father Anderson? Lovely."

The next instant he was towering over me.

"Would you rather I was someone else?" he morphed into Sonny, his voice shifting to Sonny's, "Perhaps the good captain?"

I yelped, pressed against the wall, "What the fuck!"

He laughed, changing to Mel, "Is this one more your style?" he leaned down over me, Mel's soft grin on his face.

I kicked him in the stomach, regretting instantly the I'd enhanced it, "Get a grip, Alucard. Just because my body says 'Yes, yes, yes' doesn't mean I follow the dratted choir," I tore the sheets up, pulled them around me, "Besides, I don't like your bloody competition to see who drives me batty first."

I pomfed my face into the depths of my pillow. Couldn't they go find another woman to bother?

Unconsciousness drew me finally away from my aching head.

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I lay in a spa getting a wonderful back massage. Oh how sweet it was. I knew the man on the other end of those hands was strong and caring.

Another set joined in. That was odd. Spas only did one operator. What the drat?

A jerk and I turned, from my stomach to my side.

Alucard was smirking, tentacles of shadow vanishing into his coat.

"You know, my dreams were never this weird before you."

He laughed as if I delighted him, his joy echoing oddly in the room.

"Your meal is here, Judas Girl."

I rolled my eyes, "Let me guess, you find it funny the 'girls' are not eating right?"

His chuckles vibrated the air.

My hand curled into the sheets to move them when I realized two things. My uniform was missing and I had a strange blue green nightie on. I didn't own this piece of clothing.

My scowl only set off Alucard more.

Seras bounced in without knocking, "Hey there, Alex."

I figured she got what she deserved, "Please tell me the truth. Did you dress me in this?"

"What?" she blinked at me then colored, "um, I'll be outside."

She shut the door.

My eyes went to Alucard, "Do you think you get points for this?"

He sat on his throne, "You weren't sleeping well. I merely made sure you recovered faster."

Right. Like he was doing me a favor. I had the feeling he got double the pleasure out of it. First for seeing me in the nude before this nightie was put on, the second being I got back into his fights quicker between challenges.

A knock that had to be William prompted my reply, "Come in."

"Oh good," he started, "I see you've discovered the night clothes the maids put you in."

My eyes went to Alucard who was grinning, maniac like. He swirled blood colored liquid in his wine glass.

"You know, if I can't win ever, it not as fun."

Alucard lost his happy crazy expression and glowered.

The temperature dropped and I could see William edging towards the door.

"Just a thought," I stood, ruing the clingy fabric. I could feel Alucard's eyes on me. If I had chosen the outfit I wouldn't be so worried. Oh, who was I kidding, I'd be just as nervous at his intensity.

I snagged my summer kilt, a top, before ducking behind the screen, "William, I was wondering what the timing of my meals for five total will be now."

He cleared his throat, " You were getting your meals at 9 PM, 11 PM, 2 AM, and 5 AM. For the next few days it will be 9 PM, 11 PM, 1 AM, 3 AM ending with 5 AM."

I slid the kilt on, snapped the closures, then stripped off the nightie before pulling on my top. It read across my chest, "Real monsters are the ones inside. Wait...Get it out! Get it out now!"

Stepping out, folding the impromptu wear I'd been given, I went to the dresser and put the clinging scrap away.

Turning to my desk, I noted it was 9:30 PM, "A bit late today but hopefully the migraines will go away," I sat, then dug into my meal with enthusiasm.

"If you require more we propose an increase in the food weight from one kilo to one and a half."

Using a handkerchief, I wiped my mouth, looked over at the butler, "Thank you William. That sounds like a good back up plan."

He bowed and departed.

The chill in the air remained. Well, Alucard should know by now that I tell the truth as I see. I had no chance of beating him in a fight, especially not at his full power. I had the feeling that the wolf form was not even part of his last release of power.

Finishing quickly, I took the dishes out to the cart so William could get them later.

Hmm. What should I do now?

Report. Groan.

I did the report, printed it. All ready to go.

Brrzzz.

I jumped before recognizing the shape now vibrating on my desk as a phone.

Picking up the slim device, seeing the very odd number I answered with, "Good evening, this is Alex."

"Bring your weapons," Sir Integra's voice commanded, "you and Alucard are supporting the troops already in the field. Come to my office," click.

Well, at least no one had to run down to tell us that.

I found one last uniform in my dresser. I sure hoped laundry would come through.

Dressed, holstered up, I stepped out from behind the screen.

Alucard smirked.

"I take it you'll met me up there by phasing?" I didn't give him time to answer as I walked up the corridor, ascending to Sir Integra's office.

When I knocked, her voice sounded weary.

"You and Alucard," her gaze went around to room as if expecting him to pop out of a wall, "will be following Sonny. A minor infestation turned out to be more of a problem than anticipated."

"Your orders, my master?" Alucard's hand rubbed the center of my back.

I tried not to react in favor or displeasure. Best not to encourage him.

"Search and destroy," she flicked a glance at me, "yours Alex is to be back-up. Nothing more. No migraines this evening."

"Yes, sir," as if I wanted to have my head pounding.

"William has your ammo."

I flushed as having forgotten to ask for some "Thank you, sir."

"Go."

I turned and left. Alucard would follow at his own pace.

William appeared and handed me several clips.

I stored them in the generous uniform pouches as I headed to the garage at William's behest.

Alucard was of course sitting across the entrance to the vehicle, his legs stretched out.

"What would get you to stop this?" I asked.

He merely replied with a smile, visible under the brim of this fedora.


	10. To Take a Drink of Water

Review please. We'll continue and hope for the best.

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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I sighed about to ask again, when he spoke, "What are you offering?"

Hoping the driver would help, I looked over. Nope. He and his shotgun friend were both expressing the "We aren't here, so don't ask us," opinion.

"Well," I looked at him, "you get to the fight sooner, and if you take him or her out, then we can fight later."

"Its probably a weak one and you aren't close enough."

I rolled my eyes at that. Maybe...well I'd been passive about his pranks. Perhaps I should tease him back?

I smiled, "I guess you don't want to know what I did you my gun yesterday," I turned to return to Integra, "I'm sure Sir Integra would love to hear it. Gak!"

He had seized my shirt and yanked me inside the van to sprawl in my seat.

Righting myself while gasping in breaths, I buckled up, "Ready to go."

Alucard's glasses slipped so his insanity was visible as he fixed a stare on me.

I wondered what color his eyes had been before this crimson hue. Black like his soul? Brown like chocolate? Icy blue like Integra's?

"Are you going to talk or must I cut your tongue out?"

Okay, I liked my tongue. I had many things to taste, to savor.

"Anderson is able to bless on the run. A flag pole he can uproot, bam instant blessed weapon. He can bless a bible in a similar manner to do his page teleport. I, though, for the page teleport use any book and its my own power that imbues the paper. It makes sense that I could do the same to my weapon as Anderson does to his blades. Also my...reasoning if you will, works with the blessing to deal more damage."

Alucard laughed, "Judas Priest will not enjoy that explanation."

"Depends on how he views me. Seems he cares that I live. Strange really."

"Oh?" Alucard leaned into my face, "Why is it strange?"

"He spouts about heathens, traitors, heretics. In his view I am that. I am the enemy. Yet he doesn't seem to care that I am. Only that I survive."

Alucard chuckled but said nothing. Keeping a view to himself? Nah, he wasn't one to hide things.

Thirty minutes later we arrived on scene. Alucard vanished from his seat, while I stepped out. Then gaped.

Ghouls were pouring, a veritable flood of them, from both a warehouse and a boat behind it. One of those container ships.

The teams were forced backward by the sheer numbers. So far none had died...yet.

I was seized from behind, lifted into the air. I kicked out, hearing bone break.

A high-pitched squeal erupted as I dropped to the ground, released from captivity. Turning, I faced a vamp who was taller than Alucard. Wow, and here I thought Alucard had the height market cornered.

My gun was out and blowing the vamps head off before he could blink his red eyes.

I turned to face the ghouls, "Lovely."

Then there were two sets of animals rushing into out men. Hellsing troops were flung skyward by three bison, or chomped by a large crocodile.

Oh drat!

I could hear Alucard's guns barking, echoing oddly. Who the hell was he fighting? There were two vamps standing on the roof, partially visible as their animals took out Hellsing

Stupid Alucard. All about fighting the biggest and baddest, leaving the humans to die. No wonder Sir Integra gave me this assignment.

Pushing my power unto my weapon, reasoning it, I aimed at the animals. Shot three times.

The crocodile and one of the bison exploded into bits of flesh.

Then I was tackled, scrapping my shoulder on the concrete road.

My neck was jerked to the side, pulled taunt, my bare throat open for an attack.

"Well, the virgin. Hellsing should have sent more defiled women," I saw a fanged mouth slowly descending.

How the hell did he know I was the virgin? Drat it. Survive, then get answers.

I slashed mentally at him, the gash opening from his arm across his throat, spilling blood all over me.

He laughed looking around for an enemy, still coming down for my neck.

His heart shot out of his body on my next attack as I wriggled to get out of the pin. He giggled, his eyes glowing fully red.

My blow sliced his head clean off, sending it to the side. His blood fountained for a moment then stopped.

"Feisty. I'm going to enjoy raping you," he plucked his head up and reattached it.

I tried to hit him with two walls to crush him, but they shattered when he tugged on my hair, breaking my concentration.

Alucard would be a better fate. Oh drat, I was so messed up if I thought him better than this punk...yet in a way he was. Drat it. What could I do? I wasn't dying here, not to this lump of putrid meat!

Could I teleport away? I inhaled focused on getting away.

There was a sluggish moment then the pages swirled.

He flipped me to my back then his fingers dug into my throat, "I'll tear your throat before you fly away."

If only I had something to pin the pages to the area. Make a barrier. I wished that I had what Anderson had. Knowledge. A wall against my enemies, small and mighty.

Something rattled then the pages slammed against the ground, the van, even the vampire.

He shrieked, letting go of me. Gasping in a breath, I watched as the vampire dusted, as if he started drying up from the inside.

For a couple seconds nothing else happened, then the pages of my dictionary dissolved. Leaving behind thin metal nails in various surfaces.

Gazing around, I saw that we were still on the losing end. Too many ghouls and the remaining animals.

Seizing my gun, I pointed at the nearest bison, and blew a fist sized hole in it head. I threw up walls around me to cover myself from another attack. I wasn't going to be killed this day.

Something hit my walls hard enough to bring me to the edge of consciousness, looking into the abyss of helplessness. Spots covered my eyes for a long moment.

Laying on my side, I was paralyzed as a vamp kicked me to my back. I felt numb for too long of a moment. At least he didn't do anything yet.

"Well, this fucking bitch is nasty. What do you say, boys?"

In the corner of my eyes, I saw the ghouls circling us, moaning their agony.

He was going to let them feed on me? To tear me to bits and pieces?

"Shall we fuck her, then eat her up," the vamp knelt over my legs, "or will we make her a vampire for a fucking good eternity?"

A command to my leg made it jerk up into his groin. He squeaked, rolling to a fetal position.

Pain spun my vision as I went flying up into the air. The vamp's leg was fully extended. The dratted bastard kicked me.

Cold water shocked me back to my situation as I sank under its surface.

Kicking upwards, I breached, gasped down air.

My second inhale took in a swell of water, which also dragged me under. I tried to rise again but I lost sense of direction. Forming a wall immediately proved useless. The currents shattered it.

I swam for the wall siding the water area, and hopefully a handhold. Yet the cold water was sapping my strength from my limbs, slowing me down.

To die by drowning? I never would have thought it. Vamp? Maybe. Gunshot. Possible. Regular old human fight? Quite likely. Undignified drowning? Geez.

My hand breached to air, but before I could get my head up I was dragged under again. I hated under currents. Then it felt like wires scratched my neck, right before a hand seized my scruff. I was yanked up into blissful air.

A cough cleared a bit of the water I'd inhaled and revived my strength. I helped keep my otherwise useless body afloat.

My eyes rose to the wall I'd been heading for. Alucard stood on the edge looking...a bit ruffled.

Well, his chief entertainment just went for a bath in a largish body of water. Vamps didn't like water. Something about sapping their energy.

He offered his hand, leaning over the water. I managed to lift my hand from the water and grasped his wrist.

The next instant I was sitting on solid ground, dizzy from the speed used, coughing water out of my abused air-starved lungs. Mel knelt and assisted my water expulsions by patting my back.

I could see from the corner of my eye he was dry. So who had saved me? Who had the weird wires on him? Perhaps bad memories risen to disturb me at the edge of death?

Boots and legs appeared in my field of vision, dripping water unto the asphalt.

My gaze travelled up to Sonny's worried eyes.

"Get a blanket over here," he ordered.

"The remaining vamps?" I coughed violently, spewing some more water. How much had I taken in?

"We got them when you went flying. You went a good fifty meters over the water before you dropped into it," Mel looked relieved as a blanket was dropped over my shoulders, "How'd you get the vamp off of you? I saw one going down to bite you."

"Luck and chance," I replied suddenly exhausted, "This was supposed to be routine? No wonder you need top-level skills to deal with them," I hacked out what I hoped was the last of the water.

I was picked up. My gaze went to Alucard's face. I saw nothing, though I felt boredom. I guess me drowning wasn't interesting anymore.

Alucard looked back over his shoulder, "Handle the rest, captain."

Sonny scowled, "Yeah. I doubt we'll be needing more of your help this night," there was a bitter tone underneath it. I looked but saw no one had died. Looked to be cuts, bruises and a couple broken bones.

Alucard walked away without commenting on Sonny's odd tone. The van was mostly intact and our driver was behind the wheel looking like he was really ready to leave right now.

I was set down in my seat before Alucard straightened and grinned, "Curious."

I looked at him, "Curious about what?"

He only smiled and diverted with, "How's your head?"

I blinked thinking on my answer and his avoidance of my question. Was he seeing something I wasn't?

"I don't feel a migraine coming on. Just feeling like a drowned rat really," I pulled a strand of my hair away from my cheek, "I am going to need my own shampoo. Wet lavender is horrible smelling."

"No migraine?" Sonny arrived, rubbing his head dry. He looked good wet but I was betting Alu...I wasn't going there. Besides Alucard never got wet.

I was sinking into insanity, or was I there already?

I answered, "No sign, as yet."

"Means you are getting stronger," I felt a spurt of worry at that from Sonny.

He continued with "or you are eating enough already," he folded the towel over his arm, "Three vampires singled you out. Its not just coincidence."

"Is it because I'm the only female on the battlefield?" inside I doubted that was the case.

Alucard sneered, "Scum wouldn't care about that. You looked helpless. They would have left you for last, taking the men for ghouls."

My eyes went up to Alucard's, "Do I read as non-human to you or something more than I appear?"

He smirked, teeth showing, "Naive human."

"Was that what drew them in?"

Sonny shook his head, "I have to agree with Alucard's assessment. They would have defeated the fighting men before going after you," he gave off a spurt of anger.

Gritting my teeth, I hissed in frustration, "Then someone pointed them to me. Someone knew I was going to be here and laid a trap."

Sonny fixed his eyes onto my face, "Someone in particular interested in your death that you know of?"

The wording drew up my head, and my memories of harder times, "I've had unsavory sorts after me. Doubtful they would do this," not the live ones. The dead kept their own peace, "I've pissed off Iscariot's leader but they rather kill all monsters than aid them. I can't think of anyone who'd single me out for being a humanist to lay this elaborate of a trap."

"This may be paranoia, but I'd rather assume you were the intended target of this attack," Mel spoke up. When had he joined us? Well, I was exhausted and wet. Not the head is pounding version but the my whole body has gone through too much and needs rest to recover.

"We'll take the rest of the night. Alex, get yourself home and I'd up your food intake again. If someone is gunning for you, this will not be the end," Sonny straightened, looked to the driver and his partner, "Straight back to headquarters, gentlemen."

Alucard sprawled in his seat without a seatbelt, stretched out his legs. I buckled up. I knew Alucard could survive a trip through the windshield. I couldn't. I doubted I could make a wall at this point.

Someone out there had a desire to kill me. Was it because I was telekinetic and/or empathic? I could sense vamps? I was Anderson's descendent? I worked for Hellsing? I was a humanist? That I loved Alucard?

I stiffened. I so didn't think that just now. I rubbed my face. Was it too late to leave with my heart intact?

How could I love the vamp? He's fucking irritating, crazy, homicidal, probably older than dirt and uncouth.

Yet he could survive my attacks, struck me as honorable of a sort, interesting even when scary, and he's taught me things about myself I thought impossible, made me stronger, faster.

With a smile I added, he'd help get me a gun finally, taught me how to shoot the damn thing even if I had to have help occasionally. Plus permits. One should never forget the permits.

Lastly, he didn't seem to mind that I wasn't a religious nutcase.

Was it that he wasn't religious period? It would explain his attitude towards me and the Iscariots. Yet he openly mocked them whereas I preferred organized discussion and debate.

Shifting under the blanket, I stared outside, at the passing streets.

With my powers and ancestry, I couldn't be human as genetically engineered wasn't real according to the conservative organic growing nutcases. Alucard was a vamp. At least we both weren't human.

The house appeared. At least we were home.


	11. Decisions and Fire

Review please. We'll continue and hope for the best.

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Once I have written my report for my failure to remain as a back-up, though without a migraine, I could go play my game. I had my reward coming.

The car pulled into the garage.

Alucard stepped out, unfolding his length from the car like some great big cat from a tiny cage. It almost bordered on how the million clowns got out of one of those cars that is not even child size.

"My master," he purred as if he knew something humorous and was seeing if she would share in it.

"How wet is wet?" her voice amused.

I scooted out and dropped the blanket. Show and tell was better than words.

She gave a real smile, "A bit of river drinking?"

"Not intentionally but the vamps thought I needed a bit more hydration. As I was unable to argue at the time, I ended drinking more than is healthy for living."

"Go change, Alex."

"Gladly, sir," I nodded, "thank you."

I walked towards the entrance to the house.

"Men, eyes on me," Integra's voice was firm.

I looked back, confused by that.

Alucard's glasses had slipped and his amused gaze briefly rested on mine before going down. Okay, I looked. Yikes! My uniform was clinging to my butt. Lovely. Just lovely. Rolling my eyes, I faced forward. I'd look over myself once I had dry clothing, my bathroom supplies and a shower.

I sure hoped none of the men stared at me. I was obviously a mess.

----------------------

Seras was laughing at my expression as I looked in her mirror.

Cling was the best term for how it molded to my butt now. The front was practically indecent on top of that. Hmm. How much was it to invest in waterproof cloth?

She had dragged me into her room to show me why every male had followed my progress though the house, even calling others to come see.

Poor William. He had just delivered my cleaned uniforms to be struck dumb by my appearance.

The front of my uniform showed off my assets very clearly. No imagination needed.

Lovely.

At least Seras had arrived and spared William my unruly dress. Hopefully, by this time William must have recovered from my appearance.

"You look like one of those runway models when doing a rain test," Seras giggled.

I glared at her, "You are not helping."

"I'll go get your clothes and your bathroom needs. At least we are a few steps from the shower."

She left, snickering again.

Staring at my image in the mirror, I scowled, "No wonder the men had to gawk," I picked a long strand of what looked to be a weed out of my hair to pitch into the wastebasket, "I look like a half-drowned girl."

"They prefer," Alucard laughed, startling me into a jump, "water nymph."

Turning, I faced him, "Yeah right. I have the appearance of..."

He backed me into a wall, eyes swirling with red as he looked down at me.

Amusement, interest, challenge.

I closed my eyes, shaking his emotions from my head, "a woman halfway in the grave. Not exactly sex dream material," opening them again I considered his expression.

He grinned and I realized what I said. Oh lovely. I just said I was closer to what he was. Undead.

"I could remedy the living half," he lowered his head. Was he going to kiss me again or go for my neck? I was split on which one I wanted him to do.

"Alex, your stuff is in the bath...Master!" she sounded happy to see him.

Of course she couldn't see me but the gasp of surprise let me know she had finally gotten where I was in the room.

Alucard glanced over his shoulder, a mild irritation entering his emotions.

Leaning to the side, my eyes locked with hers. I was trying to say with mine, "Help me out of this now!"

"Alex, did you know the new Twilight movie is out? Did you want a girl's night out?"

Alucard whirled around to face her, his frustration and rage shaking in my head, "You are not going to it, Police Girl."

I made good my escape as Seras whined, "Its only a night out!"

"That punk is not a vampire and you are not watching him be pathetic," Alucard sounded put out and insulted.

Who knew the big bad vamp didn't like fictional vamps that were not traditional? I knew of the Twilight series but not read it. Something about vegetarian vamps that glittered or glamoured their prey.

Hmm. Alucard definitely had the allure factor but his was more in the way of charm and knowing what women wanted at their core. Was I so shallow? Yep, I was drawn in by his allure too easily. How degrading to know that I was so easy to talk into a bad situation by a pretty face and domineering manner.

I ducked into the bathroom. Perfect. Seras had brought my shampoo and soap. No more lavender. Yipee!

Herbal shampoo that was mild to the nose, same as my conditioner. Peppermint soap. All these smelled better when wet than lavender.

I folded my clothes noting the ugly splotches of junk on them including a piece of gum. Like the men thought that was sexy. Ick.

With water running over my sore body, I noted the bruises. I had one down my entire side that had scrapped pavement, a boot print shaped one between my breasts, another on my thigh. Scrapes marred me in several places.

Bits of water junk and plants swirled as I cleaned up, getting longer strands out to the waste can so I didn't plug up the shower.

One final rinse and I was ready to step back into the world as a much better human than my post dunk self.

Shutting off the water, I looked down, sad I had to leave the nice, hot shower. I pulled the curtain aside, eyes shifting to the rug.

A pair of knee high bots sat on it with legs inside.

My eyes snapped up as I jerked the curtain back to cover my body.

"Alucard, drat it!" I snapped when the curtain was back in place.

I heard his chuckles as his form moved on the other side of the curtain.

Laying my head on the dewy tiles, I breathed for a long moment, trying to cool my blush off.

I loved this...child in a man's body? I was so messed up.

"You can't hide in there," he said in a reasonable tone, "what will our master think, Judas Girl?"

"She'll think I'm like any other girl suddenly faced with a man in the same bathroom without invitation. Would you please leave so I may dress?"

"Call me master."

I peeked around the curtain, "Why?"

He grinned at my suspicious tone.

I could stay in the bathroom until Integra called Alucard. Highly unlikely and I was getting cold now. I could step out and flaunt my assets. Nope, I was a bit of prude in that regard. Hmm. Wait. He wanted the word, not the manner, right?

Smiling, eyes steady on his face, I purred, "Would you please let me dress without your presence, Master Alucard?"

His grin got wider then he faded away.

It worked? Hmm. Or had he been impressed with my attempt to get out of saying the word by itself?

I stepped out, dried and dressed in record time.

I tried to sense Alucard, but the only ones I felt nearby were William and Seras.

Then I felt him, a burst of delight and the need to fight something.

I stepped out with my bundled wet clothes.

Seras was looking a bit down about something.

"What's up? Another mission?"

"They upgraded our weaponry," she sighed, "My cannon is now bigger than ever."

"So that's why Alucard is happy. They gave him an upgrade too?"

"Better bullets and modified his Jackal to handle them. Wait. You can sense his emotions from this distance?"

"How much distance are we talking about?"

"He's on the range," she frowned at me.

"Wow, I didn't know I could read to that distance. That's what...200 meters?"

"10 kilometers. We use a special range for our special weaponry."

My eyebrows rose. That was quite a distance. Was it because I was around Alucard so much that I could sense his so clearly? Yet what about Sonny and his odd emotions?

Seras looked back into her room, "Damn cannon."

"I'm fairly certain that you are the best person to handle such large weaponry. I think if I tried, I'd end up not hitting the broadside of a barn."

"As you are now," she stepped inside, "Have a good night, Alex."

"Sweet dreams, Seras."

I walked towards my room.

William was standing in the doorway of a store room, "Bloody hell."

I peeked over his shoulder.

The room was filled knee high with water. The edge of it was lapping at the doorframe, threatening to overfill into the hall and the other rooms.

"I could go turn off the valve, William."

"There's broken glass and water. You are not going in there without proper protection."

I noted then that the overhead lights were uncovered. Ah, the broken glass came from those covers hitting the floor.

As usual I was barefoot.

I wanted to try something. I knew that under the water that my walls were useless, but what if I tried setting the wall over the waters surface, using the water tension to keep afloat?

William stepped around me, "I'll go get one of the men to assist me."

I set my wall on the water, feeling the pressure on the wall from the moving water, "Let me try this first. Nothing ventured, nothing gained."

I stepped unto my wall, compensating for the jiggle from the water moving. It was like walking on a water bed. I quickly extended the wall so I could cross to the pipe and its cut-off valve. I stumbled a couple times as the water sloshed unexpectedly.

"Miss Jones-Jordan!"

I kept my concentration barely, "Almost there."

I knelt and turned the valve all the way off.

Bingo, the water slowed to a trickle then stopped.

I turned, walked back, "Now you can get the men to help drain it."

"You can walk on water?"

"Seems I can now. If only I'd known before tonight. I'd have stayed above the water during the fight," I replied cheerfully, "Good luck on the clean up, William."

"Thank you, Miss Jones-Jordan," he sounded as if he was out of it.

What? Just because I walked across water didn't mean I performed a miracle. Oh wait, maybe I just put myself into Jesus' level of power. Sigh. Religion.

I arrived at my room, opened the door.

Alucard was asleep in his throne, his head leaned to the side, body relaxed. His hat and glasses were both on his table, keeping his wine and wine glasses company. It seemed he had a replacement wineglass for the one I destroyed delivered.

I shut the door quietly before going to my desk and eating the meal sitting there.

I had to admit he looked...angelic in repose, when I turned to look at him. As if there really was a heaven and he was on loan to Sir Integra.

Pity there was no heaven, because if there was one, the residents would be screaming, "He's not one of ours. Don't be fooled!"

Hell? If that did exist, Satan would hate Alucard. Alucard caused more damage and misery than that horned and imaginary fiend.

What series of events lead to the creation of Alucard? What decisions did he make to bring him to a vamp's life? His family's decisions? His people's?

Was he always so bloodthirsty or had he decided to become so? If he decided, was it before his supposed immortality or after?

My series had started with the death of my brother. He had decided to save me, dooming himself to becoming a vamp, rather than running for his life. I had spoken out about the monsters that had killed him, a decision when I could have been silent.

The town's people demanded I be sent to an institution against my parents wishes. It didn't help that a day before I had claimed to have read the emotions of a teenage killer, even if it had resulted in an arrest later.

I'd met my first crush there, seen him controlling others with his powers. Even watched helplessly as he raped a girl with his puppets. Jacob. I hadn't thought about him in years. Not surprising as it had been a result of my decisions to confront him that the fire that had claimed his life had started, and by my hand no less. That incident had cured me of any pyromaniac tendencies and entrancement with flames.

I'd come home as a result of that fire to find Anderson trying to bring my parents out of mourning. They had been so deep in it that they had forgotten all about me.

I had decided to trust Anderson and his word to protect us. If I hadn't would I have worked harder to protect myself? Become an unthinking weapon? I don't know.

The second attack on my family several years later, claiming my baby brother had spurned another decision. My telekinesis burst into life saving my life when I'd walked into the waiting vamps. It was how I knew that cutting the head of a vamp killed them, even if it was glass.

Another trip to a glorified insane asylum as I had, once again, decided to speak out with truth rather than pretty lies. At least I had more adult words and phrasing to use that time.

Anderson was then a liar in my opinion, not a protector but one more useless lump of religious insanity. At the same time I knew I couldn't be friends with anyone. Not physically.

A doctor's decision set me free of that place. He thought that I just associated vamps with killers and that was how they'd need to translate it for the future.

Education. That decision had ruled my actions for several years. History, geography, math, science, English. I studied it all, got top grades, so that the next time I had options. Options a child never had.

Online games of quality had mercifully come into my life eight years ago, where I could 'Speak' to others and still protect them from my enemies.

My parents deaths had turned me from a frightened, weak human into a hunter. I had stopped hiding my abilities.

I smiled at the following memory. Those vamps had thought themselves safe from retribution. That no single soul would track them down. I trapped them in their rundown warehouse and flooding it with water from the nearby river, holding those weaklings inside with my walls over the windows and roof access. If they had been stronger it wouldn't have worked.

I cleaned out my hometown of all the vamps. Taking them out, one at a time. The last tried to run. He hadn't gotten far.

Anderson had reentered my life after that. Pestering me every couple weeks to join him in hunting 'Heathens, heretics and monsters.'

I deemed it was more accurate to say 'heathens, heretics and happiness' in regards to myself.

Returning to the present, I crawled on top of my bed.

Every decision from myself and others had brought me here. To rooming with an insane and war mongering vamp to whom I had given my heart, under the command of a military captain who stole kisses and had a disconnect from his emotions and his expressions, taking orders from a woman with bigger balls than 99% of men, working with a newly made female vamp I was suspecting was still a virgin, and to top it all off I was working with numerous men who eyed me as sharks do chum.

One step, one decision sideways and I'd have ended up somewhere else. Perhaps dead if it had been in the beginning, still inside an asylum, or elsewhere too frightened to use my powers to protect myself and others. Even a vamp myself if the cards had fallen wrong.

I closed my eyes and napped.

----------------------

A knock woke me. Alucard looked to still be out of it and I felt no emotions indicating he was awake.

Standing, stretching against the aches from the fight earlier, I went to answer...odd why didn't I feel any emotions from our visitor?

I opened the door to Sonny.

He beamed, emotions suddenly bouncing between happiness and eagerness, "You are cooped up too much with Mister Alucard. Why don't you join us for a karaoke night? We got beer and men not afraid to use it for entertainment."

If one stepped out of line, I could take them.

"Do I have to sing?"

"Of course. That why we need the beer, pretty."

That was a strange pet name to be using. Sonny had never said that before. The only one to use it on me had been Jacob, my first crush. Fear meshed with suspicions.

"I don't sing, especially for men who steal kisses," I went to close the door when I felt a spike of anger form Sonny and then disappointment down the hall.

I peered down to the second emotion. Mel was standing with a guitar slung on his back.

"Not even for me?" Mel asked politely.

Now I'd gone and hurt Mel's feelings. I had a soft spot for him. Drat it.

Sighing, "One song, no beer."

"You have to have beer," Sonny insisted.

The disconnects were becoming more noticeable. It was like there were two Sonny's. The one who acted, and the one who was silently emoting in his head. Almost as if...

Mel took my arm, "Come on. I have the perfect song for you to sing."

Dread settled in my stomach while both men projected happiness. I sure hoped they had selected one I could reasonably sing.

----------------------

Mel was sitting on stage, thrumming the opening to "Because the Night."

At least I could sing this one.

"Take me now baby, here as I am," my voice rang out, "hold me close and try to understand."

They cheered through many of the lines so I couldn't hear my own words.

"Because the night belongs to lovers, because the night belongs to us!"

Dark pleasure, excitement, possessiveness, homicidal urges assaulted my head.

I kept control of my expression and voice, but I felt sick inside. It couldn't be. The puppeteer was dead. I'd killed him years ago.

The song finished and I bowed myself off stage. I walked to an empty chair, sat down, trying to push through the impressions those emotions left on me. My gut and mind insisted the signature was Jacob's, but I knew they had taken out a body from the fire. Jacob had been the only one trapped in the library fire.

Had I imagined the feeling?

Mel was beaming under the congratulations, radiating normal pleasure and accomplishment. Sonny teased him about bedding a woman's voice more than her body. All so ordinary. Was I really going insane?

"Alex."

I stood and faced Sir Integra in surprise, "Sir?"

The rest of the men stopped carousing and saluted, at attention.

"Come with me," she left the room at a quick pace.

Anger flared before it was muffled. Again it felt like Jacob's.

Sonny called, "Take a beer as reward, Alex!"

I turned and caught the can he tossed at me.

I paused, kissed the outside, "Rain check boys," I tossed the can into the air.

They leapt to catch it. Every last one of them. Fighting over it.

"Her kiss is mine."

"Not in this life."

"I got it."

"No, you don't."

"Ha! Mine!" one of the quieter men kissed where I had, "Sorry, guys," he winked at me as I turned to leave.

The Jacob-alike's emotions pulsed with anger and admiration.

I had to talk to someone who wouldn't stupidly assume that I was having a religious issue. That narrowed the field down considerably. Hmm.

Maybe my power was going wonky. Who could tell?

Sir Integra sat at her desk when I arrived, using my long strides to make up the time I took to see who won the can.

"William tells me you've learned a new trick."

"I wished I'd thought of it sooner. If I had known about it I might have avoided the river dunk. I couldn't form a wall or shield under water. The pressure and the currents tore them to shreds before I could get them solid. With this trick I should be able to hit a solid surface above the water and avoid inhaling liquids that my lungs don't function well with."

"Any others you are working on or might?"

"During the fight I was pinned down. I couldn't teleport away as the vamp made me decide to live or die. I somehow managed to form a barrier like Anderson does only mine didn't last very long."

She sat up, "A spiritual barrier?"

"Nothing spiritual about it. It's like my teleport or imbuing my weapons. I've taken to calling them reasoning. So reason barrier."

She considered my words, "Reason barrier. What do you need for it?"

"My books, and nails. I was thinking of using aluminum nails."

"Why aluminum?"

"They are cheap, easily picked up at any hardware store, just like my dictionaries. Also they come in many sizes which could be adapted for different situations."

"Your empathy seems to have strengthen as well."

"Yes sir, but it seems erratic."

"Erratic how?"

"I can sense the unique signatures to individuals. That's how I knew Anderson was about to show with the dog vamp. I've been feeling emotions that are reading as an individual I know who is long dead."

"How do you know he or she is dead?"

I swallowed, "Because I'm the one to trap them in an inferno and left him for dead. His remains were recovered and identified."

She lit up a cigar. Sigh. She really should stop smoking. Her health and all.

"This person was the one found after the library fire at the first institution you stayed at?"

"Yes, sir."

"What type of emotions?"

"Anger, possessiveness, rage, desires to inflict pain and death, admiration."

"Your empathy has increased in strength. Is it possible you are sensing someone outside the manor? Someone who seems to be close in emotions to this deceased individual?"

"Its possible, but I am sure its inside the grounds."

She chewed on her cigar, "Work with Alucard to improve your ability to pinpoint single targets with unique emotions."

"Why Alucard?"

She smiled, "He claims he can mask his emotions to nothing. Perhaps it will improve your ability. A soldier must have all her abilities at flawless, no?"

"I agree, sir," I rubbed my head, "though I expect Alucard is going to make this more fun for him than me."

"He usually does. Dismissed."


	12. Testing the Emotions

Edits have been done to chapters 1 and 2.

Review please. We'll continue and hope for the best.

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Alucard was drinking his blood when I tracked him down, scowling at Seras.

She was trying to phase through a wall like he did...or was trying to find new ways to bruise her head and arms in a manner befitting U-Tube's silliest people.

Irritation and disappointment rang from him, a clarion call through my senses. So why was I feeling Jacob's unique patterns earlier?

Seras whined, "I can't do it. I keep hitting the bloody wall," she spotted me, gave me the universal "help me" look.

"So how does this work?" I sat on her coffin, truly curious.

Happiness bubbled in Seras, also loud and clear. I knew it was hers and not say Mel's up three floor's, feeling as if he was playing his guitar.

Mel loved that instrument more than any woman, even me. No wonder he got teased.

"He says I let the shadows to the surface just a little but not loose form, then step."

"How many times have you tried?"

"She's behind on her training," Alucard growled, "Not able to take the form of mist or bats, to walk though obstacles nor summon her familiars."

"I drank human blood at least," she sighed back at him, "Master."

"So these shadows you mentioned are?"

Seras' left arm vanished into a flaring shifting weaving mess of...well shadows. They had the appearance of blades as they moved, shifted shape as if in a breeze.

"Drat. That's interesting," I looked at her shadowy limb then the wall, "Is the point of this exercise to move in the empty spaces of the wall?"

Seras' limb morphed back and she gaped, "What are you going on about?"

"What do you know of physics, specific atoms?"

"Oh!" She looked at the wall, her eyes went red then she walked through the wall without incident.

Alucard blinked, "What did you tell her?" he was curious, intrigued and excited.

"Nothing. I asked a question. I don't know what you guys do with your shadows but I thought maybe you use the empty space between inanimate objects at the atom level to 'phase' though walls, floors and ceilings."

"We don't," Sera Leapt out of the floor, picked my up in a hug and bounced up and down, making me dizzy in the process," Ha, ha, I get it now. Phasing through."

"May I be let down?"

She dropped me to my feet, "I'm going to show the guys," she ran off, opening the door instead of phasing.

"Huh, training called on account of show and tell," I scratched my head, "I still don't get what is going on so I'll just live with that mystery."

"Why are you here, Judas Girl? You haven't sought me out before outside of my room."

"Our room," I corrected, "On Sir Integra's orders. She wants my empathy to improve so I will be able to pinpoint single targets. She said you claimed to be able to mask your emotions."

"I escape your notice then you will leave your communication line open for one full night with your game."

My cheeks paled, "What the drat?" he'd be doing something in the background in the middle of a raid? Or my own private comments on performance being heard by all?

Then rage came, pushing a decision to get equal with him, "Then if I win, you have to give me your tie and teach me how to tie it in that loop bow."

"One night."

"Nope. If you insist on open vent line during my game night, which I am sure you will select as a raid night, meaning any and all noises would be heard, potential destroying my reputation on my game, I get the tie for a minimum of a month."

He grinned, "You are beginning to understand," he nodded, "Agreed."

Then he vanished.

"Deal," I sighed, then focused on trailing his emotions.

-----------------------

Ten hours later, I was walking into the house, chasing ghosts of emotions.

Alucard quickly proved I could find him at no masking, minimal and on average. Now he was fully masked if the lack of feelings was any clue.

My head was aching, but I refused to have my game reputation ruined by a vamp.

The emotional signature came from Sir Integra's office.

Sighing, I knocked.

"Come in," she called.

I walked in.

"Alex?" she placed her papers aside, "You look like you haven't slept."

"Not yet. Alucard is playing games with his emotions fully masked."

"Oh?"

"I'm having trouble finding him, but i got the sense he was in here."

I looked around, then sighed, "Drat," I rubbed my pounding head, "I have been chasing ghosts all night."

Triumph. A smallest hint of it.

I glared at the wall behind Integra, "I felt that, Alucard. You haven't won yet."

He came through with a huge grin plastered on his face, "Oh? I'm not even at my full power in this."

Lovely. I thought I had been doing decently, "Of course not. I can't win in any case," rubbing my temples I continued, "Okay, you go do the full one. I just hope my guild doesn't take the noise to heart if I lose."

"What do you mean" Integra was watching us, "And why haven't you taken a pill for your migraine, Alex?"

"I did. Not working. In addition, I ate my meals between attempts."

Alucard leaned on the desk, smirking at his master, "She bargained that she could find me. I win, she has to leave her radio line open in the middle of her game on a night of my choosing."

"Alex, if you win?" Integra took out one of her cigars and lit it.

"I get his red tie for a month, and he has to teach me to tie it."

She laughed, "I'm not sure which outcome I should be voting for. Continue for one more hour. Then Alex, you need sleep. Also let William know to get you the next level of pills for your migraines."

"The gel caps work faster, better. I prefer them."

Integra held out her hand, "Give me what's left, tell William, complete you assignment, then get yourself to bed. I'll want a full report tomorrow once you are up."

I pulled out the pill bottle, handed it to her. It rattled only slightly as I hadn't taken that many yet, "Will do, sir."

"Alucard, a moment while Alex speaks with William."

I strode out. William was not more than ten meters from Integra's office, righting a mirror with a crack running through it. Antique mirror that must have been damaged when the house had been.

"William," I greeted.

"You are up rather late, Miss Jones-Jordan," he looked concerned.

"Completing an assignment from Sir Integra. I was hoping to add an item for myself to the next trip to the store."

"Another bottle of migraine medicine?"

Smart man, "If I could get the gel type of Excedrin, that will help more. It seems to work faster and better on my migraines prior to my arrival in England."

"Certainly. I'll make sure its there with your first meal."

"Thank you, William."

"Good luck on your assignment, Miss Jones-Jordan."

I smiled, walking down to the entrance hall. Alucard was waiting, looking really, really, happy.

He...I sensed nothing from him.

"Oh, drat!" I gaped as he vanished, his grin as wide as the Cheshire Cat.

----------------------

I chased my tail around the house, trying to sense Alucard for one hour exactly. If I thought the precious masking was hard, this was impossible.

I went from the entrance to the gun range, followed up with the barracks, which thankfully was empty, to the to the topmost roof, down to the gardens, with a side trip to a random bedroom in the main portion of the house.

The room I shared with Alucard was the last stop. My gut said Alucard was with me in the room, but my head pounded too hard to really say either way.

Sighing, I sat on my bed, rubbed my throbbing temples before falling sideways.

"Where are you, Alucard?"

"Seems you tracked me in spite of me being emotionless," he clapped, fading into view over by his coffin.

Ow. That single sound from his palms meeting hurt my poor brain.

"That can't be right," I looked up at his face, "I was following nothing."

"You followed me. You weren't in those locations by chance," he smirked, "What were you following?"

He said it in a tone that suggested he already knew the answer. Drat him and his superiority complex.

I went over the memories, my head still pounding, "This would be better done when my head is not echoing with bass drums."

"So weak to let some pounding beat you."

I ignored him, thinking, closing my eyes. He was right. Under the memory of pain and misery at losing to a vamp, though a strong one, was a trail.

My eyes opened, "Bloodlust. I followed your bloodlust. You can suppress it, but not entirely mask it."

"If you can track me with such a faint emotion, then you won't have troubles with anything else," he undid his tie.

I blinked in confusion, my brain slowly winding down for much needed sleep.

Why was he undoing his tie?

"You won," he pulled the tie from around his neck, dangled it over me.

"I don't win when I go up against you," I rubbed my head trying to push out the raging jack-hammers inside my skull, "I'm not good enough."

Red cloth filled my vision. I gasped, taking the offending length from my sight. His tie.

"I don't think red will suit you," Alucard stalked to his coffin, "I'll teach you tomorrow night to tie it."

He vanished.

I looked at my...prize apparently.

I had bested him? With my head vibrating with engines and hammers, I had tracked him by his bloodlust.

"Damn, this feels good," I whispered as I got to sitting long enough to set the tie on my desk, before crawling under the covers and letting sleep take me.


	13. Formal Wear and Annoying Pests

Review please. We'll continue and hope for the best.

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

----------------------------------------------------------------

I awoke, staring up at the ceiling. I scanned, trying to pinpoint the major players in the house.

Integra was calm, focused, ordered up four floors.

I didn't sense Seras. Probably still asleep or she had gone out on assignment already.

In fact, there were few up and about. William and various household staff were the only ones going about their business.

Sitting up, I reached over and snagged my kilt for the day, and then riffled through my dresser for a blouse. Hmm. When had my boxed clothes been unpacked? William? Well, he was very organized and seemed to know what to do so we all had less to worry about.

A blouse with a high fold-down collar at the bottom most of a pile caught my attention.

I pulled it to the light. The blue green would contrast against the bright red. It was the only one with a high collar meant for a tie of any kind. Maybe I could ask William for one. Nah, this was only for a month.

I slipped it on then started buttoning it up.

"So eager to wear your prize?"

I looked up, over my shoulder at Alucard's grinning face, "I don't win often, Alucard. This is the first time I've been able to face you while we both are doing our full best on the challenge. Also its the first time I've gotten out of a competition ahead, instead of looking at your back while you win."

His grin widen, and he cocked his head to the side, showing his throat was bare and the top two buttons on his shirt were undone. Sexy and so bitable. Oh, drat! He was rubbing off on me.

Plus, his expression said he knew what I had been thinking. A flush crept up my cheeks at that look. Cyst him and the horse he rode in on.

"Face the mirror," he said simply.

"What?" I turned. Drat. There was a gilded mirror propped against the wall, the bottom edge resting on my bed. I wondered where he got it from. I sure hoped it wasn't Integra's. He'd have done that just to upset the balance of the household.

He plucked the tie from the desk, came to tower over me at my back.

It shouldn't have been intimate but it just seemed to go that way. Probably as I was alone with him and had urges. The boys always got the research on when they got the sexual thoughts but girls, oh no, they couldn't have them. Girls had to be pure of mind. Hypocrites.

Alucard threaded the tie under the collar making the cloth tickle the sides of my neck.

He murmured instructions as he showed me how to tie it, his fingers agile as he looped and slid the cloth.

The resulting bow tie was exactly like his, except for some reason it looked bigger on me. Hmm, I guess my neck was thinner or something.

"Hmm. I'm thinking the tie is going to swallow my chest at this rate. You sure this isn't the monster tie?"

He chuckled, "Tie it yourself then."

I reached up to pull the tie loose.

Buzz.

I stopped the motion to pick up my phone, "Alex here."

"Sir Integra wishes to convey her gratitude by allowing you a day off to acquire new attire," William's voice spoke gently, "She recommends that you get more blouses and formal wear."

"May I inquire as to why I need new clothes?" I had some decent items.

"Her majesty will be keeping an eye on us, especially you as the newest...powered individual."

"That's the nicest term I've heard for it. So I have to look like I'm not strong enough to tear into normal humans, or just more civilized?"

"The younger and less prone to fighting, the better."

"So I need to look and act like a normal human?" my smile curled in humor.

"You'll need to refrain from your power displays save on missions and in training with Alucard. In addition, it would be best to tone down your eloquence. The younger you are in their view, the less likely they will try to recruit you."

"They would try to go around Sir Integra in that way?"

"If they thought you would join them willingly. Best to appear to be a loyal, young, naive girl who's a bit special."

"There's something else isn't there, William?"

"Nothing you need to concern yourself with. I will bring down your meal and the list of suggested shops," click.

"Hmm."

Alucard snickered, "So the politics have tangled more."

"What politics?"

He only went to sit on his throne.

Irritated by his silence on the matter, I sat down to start my game and check my auctions and mail for my avatars.

William rolled in the morning meals for me and Alucard. Oatmeal, fresh fruit, milk and some pieces of bread with jam and butter for me; A negative blood for Alucard. Hmm I so hoped Alucard didn't like B positive in spite of the virgin factor.

"Your bottle of gel pills for work," William offered the sealed bottle once my plates had been served.

"Thank you William," I took the bottle and slipped it into the belt pouch for work.

"And for your normal day," a second bottle of pills.

I smiled, "I sure hope I don't need to use them," I slipped it into my kilt pocket.

"A list of shops with appropriate attire," he handed me a list, "Ring me when you are ready to venture out."

William left then. I sighed. Shopping. I either found a good store and got many copies of what appealed to me or I took a glance and burned rubber out of the shop.

I flipped through the list, scowling at the names. Ick. They all had titles that invoked the image "I'm a girly girl in pink fluff." I wasn't a pink girl.

I read to the bottom.

"Nice," I noted the last one was a local branch selling my brand of kilts, "at least I can manage if that store is the apple at the end."

I finished my meal, stacked the dishes, then carried them out to the trolly.

When I went back in, I called William for transpo out to the stores.

Alucard said nothing as I waved over my shoulder and walked up to the main floor.

The trip to the first store was short going to, then coming out of.

Pink, white and ivory. Frosting colored.

Scratch one shop. One hundred to go.

This was going to be one long day.

----------------------

I was standing in a decent shop, pawing through floor length skirts for another black one when I sensed him two blocks south and one block west.

Anderson.

Dratting cyst.

He was going to try to talk to me again if he caught sight of me. I had to give him credit. He was one persistent bastard.

Oh goody, he also had Marvin the Martian with him. Sigh. This shopping trip was going to turn really fun. Not!

I got the last skirt, brought my pile forward to the register.

One block away now from my location, south.

The woman accepted my card and rang me up in record time.

I signed the receipt, handing it back to her. She gave me the bags, my card back then wished me a good day.

I bowed my head, repeating back the well-wishing before exiting to the sidewalk.

My eyes tracked to Anderson immediately. He was a tower in a grassy field. Easily seen from a long distance off.

He was walking at Marvin's back, eyes forward, looking bored and mildly disgusted.

Then he turned his head, eyes locking on me. Surprise flashed, then joy.

Marvin though smirked as he followed Anderson's gaze to my glare. Like he was looking for me specifically. I guess he had spies on me to tell him where I was and what I was doing.

My driver came up, swallowing. I had the feeling he had been briefed on these two. Good. One less person in my way or theirs.

"May I take your purchases, Miss Jones-Jordan?" the driver squeaked as Anderson made his way towards us, forcing a path. I couldn't see Marvin but I could sense he was following in Anderson's wake. It was like watching a battering ram coming straight at you.

"Certainly. Best to let Sir Integra know who's nosing around while you are at it," I freed my hands in case a fight broke out...or I had to run.

The driver slunk off quickly. Smart man. I was the dumb one for standing there, waiting for the enemy.

My eyes stayed steady on my grandfather's wondering what this visit would entitle.

Humans flowed around me. I shouldn't fight here, yet the surrounding streets were equally busy and crowded. I moved to the side so we wouldn't block the streaming pedestrians.

Anderson towered over me. I was use to it now. Why were the two most dominant masculine elements in my life so much taller than me? Dratted human decision collective.

Marvin started in with a speech. Something about my duty as Anderson's child was to serve god or some such.

Anderson and I considered the other. Weighing the other.

I decided to be impulsive.

"You ever take your children shopping, Father Anderson?"

He looked surprised, "I canna say I have, Alex."

"Well, you'll probably be bored as that is today's trip," I walked around him, continued down the walk.

"Alex, you are not well."

I rolled my eyes at Marvin. I so wanted to do the talking hand motion but resisted.

Too childish. Drat. I wanted to be a child. Alucard, cyst him and his contagious attitude.

I pulled my list from my pocket, scanned down to the next shop, reading the address in very small print.

Glancing around, I paused in front of the next shop.

Okay the dresses were decent looking.

"You don't need clothes, Alex. Join us and you'll never have to show yourself off."

I turned and sneered at Marvin, "I'm not being forced to show off. This is of my choosing," either do this or make Sir Integra unhappy.

I prefer Integra happy and on my side.

I walked inside, checked out the dresses. Neither one wanted to follow. Probably for the best. I would have tortured them by taking extra long time in some fancy stockings and such.

Lingerie store torture. Woman's ultimate revenge and tool. Only perverts and men who really cared about a woman dared to face that challenge.

I found a couple okay dresses that I knew others would love so I bought only singles in my size after I tried them on.

I stepped out to Marvin the Martian's preaching again.

My patience was wearing thin by the time I was down to two stores and my incentive shop. I hadn't found any other dresses of interest and I was having a hard time controlling the urge to break Marvin's legs just to give him something else to whine about.

"Alex, your duty is to the church."

"Oh? I thought my duty was to God," I looked around, "I don't see him. I guess its my day off."

Marvin seized my upper arm, eyes and emotions flickering with rage.

My eyes went first to the thick fingers clasping my flesh, then rose to Anderson's, "Get him away from me before I send him back with limbs missing. I'm sure I can find a taxidermist willing to mount them in my room for mood lighting."

Anderson easily pried me loose, "Perhaps when ye have another day off, we may arrange a meeting. Ah have many things to discuss with ye, Alex."

"Leave the mouth piece at home and email a time you think would be suitable," I stalked off.

"You are just letting her walk off, Father Anderson?"

"She tolerated us long enough, Archbishop. Ah will arrange a meeting. The more personal, the more likely she'll listen."

I rolled my eyes. Wow, old dogs can learn new tricks. The world had to be ending when Anderson changed his routine.

Yet I was free of Marvin's annoying voice. Yippee. I thought after seeing "Mars Attacks" that I had heard the worse noise in the world. No, Marvin the Martian put those aliens to shame. If he had been facing them, they would have bowed down to him and his awful voice.

The next shop reflected the more cheery atmosphere without my two shadows.

I wandered through, trying on several formals I fell in love with.

Which ones to take home for use?

"We have shoes to match too, miss."

I smiled as my gaze rested on a very short woman, "My feet aren't exactly normal, ma'am."

"Come on," she too my hand, "Try on some of my shoes and then decide which of my creations sing to you."

Oh no. That unique phrasing meant she was another religious nut. New age freak.

Which she confirmed with, "The crystals say these shoes would go best with your aura."

Auras. Big ugh, "Let's see," I murmured with no promises.

Twenty minutes later I was sick of her "Auras" "Reincarnation" "Lover needs" and any other New Age babble she seemed to make up on the spot. Such icky baby talk. It didn't help that my feet hadn't fit in any of her shoes. Mine were big whereas the designer must have had a gazelle for the fitting.

I snagged the correctly sized pair in black, stalked to one of the dresses I liked, taking both to the dressing room next.

I can only stand so many religious types in one day. Annoyance factor was a big determinator on the exact number. I was finding Anderson wasn't nearly as a pest as Marvin nor New Age Woman.

I dressed, stepped out.

The mirrors reflected a very nice-looking girl, with intelligent eyes, loose hair and a firm will.

Perfect.

Ten minutes later, I was out of the shop with three new dresses that the black shoes should match with no issue. Besides, black hides many bad and ugly things.

The next shop wasn't worth my time so I went my reward. I so earned it after Marvin. New Age Woman made it a necessity for mental stability.

"Welcome to Utilikilts," a man greeted from where he was measuring a kilt on man with a heavy beer gut. Ugh. Get out and run more silly man. The world doesn't need to see that your belly button reaches your knees.

"Thank you," this was the quiet moment I had been seeking since Marvin started his litany.

"Please look around," the man smiled as he turned back to his work.

The one disadvantage to working in customer service. You had to smile when faced with those who had let themselves go either physically or mentally.

The customer left happily though after about twenty minutes with two new kilts.

"So," the man started, "Are you looking for a man in your life? Or would this be for yourself?"

His eyes dropped to my kilt, and I knew he recognized it was on of his brands.

"Myself," I answered.

"Pity, you look like a woman a man would gladly change for."

I had this image of the Hellsing troops going into combat with kilts on.

I started laughing, "I doubt any of the men I know would willingly wear a kilt."

He smiled, "So what style are you looking for?"

"All?"

"A first for me. Lets go over them so we ensure your all is covered. You sure no man?"

I tried to imagine William in a kilt but even the tuxedo version I spied hanging in the window wouldn't appeal to him. The soldiers of Hellsing were too small minded about religion and most religious sects had strict ideas of what fashions were appropriate. Alucard...hell no. He'd never wear one. He was definitely a pants and coat type of man. He didn't need a kilt to exude raw power and nobility.

"Just little ol' me," I chuckled, "Why don't we start with your original?"

"We have black, tan, olive, burgundy and camouflage. Mocker has the same colors too."

"One of each in 38 waist, 27.5 length or 24.5 if that is the longest you have."

"You knew what you wanted before even entering the shop, didn't you," his eyes warmed even more and I felt relief from him. The previous customer must have been trying for him to think me this much better.

"For the original, and the Mocker. The tuxedo and Workman are new to me and we'll need to try a few out."

"Okay, here is a Workman in 38 waist, 26.5 length," he pulled out one from the rack as if from memory.

"One of your brand new didn't work versions?"

"The man obviously didn't get the whole swing free idea."

"I don't blame him on the no cover below the kilt," I took it, "Tuxedo?"

He pulled down two, "38 waist, 20 length; 40 waist, 22 length."

I took the three, "Better start getting the originals, sir."

"On it, ma'am," he whistled as he searched the racks.

I made someone's day. What a wonderful feeling.

I tried on all three kilts. The Workman was exactly like the other kilts. Perfect fit. The 38 waist was a mite too tight. The 40 waist was a hint loose, but with a classy belt workable. These were made for men and not a woman's curves, though I found most gave my hips a bit more swing.

I stepped out, "Workman is the right size. Tuxedo needs the next waist up for me."

"Workman we only have in tan and grey right now. Tuxedo," he smiled, "only black."

"Then one of each. Black goes with many colors."

He took down the kilts, "That all?"

"What socks do you have in stock?"

"Knee length mostly. Got a couple 3/4th leg ones but most customers return them," he walked behind a rack, hefted something, pulled it into view.

I looked them over, "I can see why they didn't want them. I guess that is it for now."

He totaled it up, "Two thousand, fifty-three point sixteen Euros."

I handed him my card.

He bagged as the receipt was printed out.

A signature and I was walking out with my new kilts, more positive from the experience. Now if no annoying nutcases bugged me, I could retain the goodwill until I got home.


	14. Rush and Twin Rockets

Review please. We'll continue and hope for the best.

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

----------------------------------------------------------------

My driver awaited me outside, almost dancing in anxiety.

"Sir Integra wishes you to end your shopping and return."

"I just finished," I let him take the bags, "The car is where?"

"This way, ma'am."

What had I done to warrant a recall? I had been gracious and pleasant with Anderson and Marvin the Martian so no international incident could have occurred. Had an attack been reported that involved vamps?

"How soon will we arrive at the house?" I asked as he set the bags in the trunk with my other purchases. Funny, I had spent more on my kilts than all the dresses combined. At least I could wear the kilts more than once without fear of them disintegrating on me.

"About thirty minutes if traffic agrees."

I slipped inside and buckled in.

Once my items were stored, he drove aptly into the morning rush.

I pulled my cell phone and called the house.

Integra spoke, "Are you on your way back, Alex?"

"I am. I'll be at the house in about thirty minutes barring an accident. May I inquire for the priority of my return?"

"Both Alucard and Seras are out on missions. A hospital has been attacked. You will be the one to clean it up."

"How many targets?"

"One, but the number of ghouls is growing."

Alone. Humans were dying and I was the only one who would be dispatched to save them. To allow their stories, their decisions to change the world.

"I'll rush in once I'm on the grounds, Sir Integra."

She hung up.

I looked out at the street.

Every one of the pedestrians flowing by, unaware a monster passed them. One in human form, protecting them from others. One that wasn't of the same ideology as them, yet working for the same goal. Happiness.

I was a gun, a blade to shield them from those who slaughtered without regard to the population.

If the vampires struck so often, they would wipe out humanity with their kin and ghouls. Stupid to destroy your food source. Better to control your urges. Some people never learned moderation. It happened with humans and monsters alike.

"Memories are being silenced and I have no way to stop it."

"Miss?" the driver asked.

"Nothing. Please hurry as best you can."

He nodded.

----------------------

I was out of the car before it stopped, running inside five minutes before my expected ETA. It seemed traffic had vanished after we exited the city towards the house. Good thing all the collective decisions of every human had produced that result.

William stood in the entry hall with my uniform, boots, and my gun holster with gun ready.

"If you would follow me, Miss Jones-Jordan, there is a room you can change in."

I did. Time was ticking away, human lives being lost.

He handed me the uniform and boots.

The room turned out to be a guest one. I closed the door.

I stripped my clothing, kicking off my shoes.

"Is she in there, William?"

"Yes, Sir Integra."

A knock sounded as I was slipping on the uniform, "Alex?"

"A moment please, Sir Integra," I opened the door, staying out of sight, starting with the top buttons and neatly pushing them in their appropriate holes.

She came in and closed the door, raising an eyebrow at the neat pile of my clothes draped over the desk chair.

"The vampire has not moved from the hospital as yet. We confirm one single vampire on the cameras before he cut them. No others entered from the street."

"Do we have an estimate of how many patients and staff were in the building, Sir Integra?" I pulled on the boots, knelt to laced them up.

"Upwards of six hundred. If we are lucky there are only four hundred."

"I'll have to save my ammo for the end then," I stood, pulling the uniform straight.

"Your orders are simple, Alex: Search and destroy. Do not let your enemies leave that building as anything but ashes," her eyes flashed with her glasses. Cold, merciless.

I nodded, eyes hardening, "Yes, sir, Sir Integra."

"Now go."

I saluted, then walked out for my weapons, and my dictionaries.

----------------------

I rode with Mel and Michael. Apparently Alucard and Seras had been sent out without human back-up. Very nasty vamps apparently. Sir Integra could not afford her men being killed.

They were to contain the ghouls and vamp to the building, help clear the way for me to get at the vamp in the center of the mess. Though they grumbled about Sonny.

Sonny was away on Hellsing business. Recruiting if what the men were alluding to was right.

Michael growled, "This bastard chose a pip of a place to do this. Too many entrances, too many people to convert to ghouls."

"Can you contain it while I get in to deal with the heart of this corruption?" I asked leaning over to look at the building plans he had pulled up.

"The best insertion points are from the sewer, and the roof."

I felt my face scrunch up, "Been a long time since I've had to sewer dunk, but it may work. Most people don't think of the roof nor sewer as entry ways that need guarding."

"We'll approach this outlet just around the corner," Mel pointed on the street map, "The target shouldn't see you coming while we provide the main entertainment."

"Just make sure your fingers remained attached. Be a pity for the men to lose your thrumming near morning to get to sleep," I teased, even as I hated the smell I was going to have to endure soon.

"Better keep that fine figure intact to keep us awake all day, Alex," Mel smirked back.

"You might turn a lady's head with that talk if they didn't carry a gun," I pointed at a cross street, "What is this marking? Looks like an electrical symbol."

"Maintenance for some old power lines. Why?"

Something inside me said it was important, "I'd have someone covering that just in case the service tunnel goes all the way to the hospital. I would loath to have my prey escape so easily."

"Jason can sit there. He has the best hearing and can handle a few ghouls solo."

"ETA two minutes," our driver called out.

"Alex, take these," Michael handed me a head set and some goggles, "Records what you see and hear. May help with tracking this guys movement if he ends up getting by you."

"Communication line, too?"

"All the way to the manor. Sir Integra will monitor. Hopefully, Alucard or Seras will be redeployed. Quicker clean up and you can go back to covering our asses."

I glanced at Michael, "You did fine before I was kidnapped from my flat. I'm sure you can remember quickly to duck without my powers shielding you or Alucard laughing after you."

I slipped the goggles on and the ear piece into my ear.

To listen to the team taunt, bet and laugh.

Life. What I was protecting by going on the offense.

Today the part of the hunter is being played by Alex Jones-Jordan, understudy to Alucard. The prey, some pesky vamp with no sense of long term goals.

The van stopped.

"Everyone, deploy!" Mel took his rifle and threw open the doors.

I followed, instantly scanning for vamps.

"He's hiding his signature," I said calmly, "I'll have to play hide and seek with him it seems."

Michael smiled, "Let's start towards the corner. We'll spread out from there while you enter the depths."

We all moved as a unit, approaching the corner where I'd be dropping into the Bog of Eternal Stench...well not that lasting but just as awful.

We were to in the open. I looked up the street noting that the avenue was wide and free of clutter, cars. I slowed looking in the unfriendly windows, black and menacing.

I must be getting paranoid. Still...I put up a shield over myself and all those ahead of me. Everyone else ignored the ground or sky, but I wasn't going to be caught.

Screams woke me. I was staring up at the sky, gunfire bursting, explosions sounding.

Mel blocked the near clear view of the sky, "Alex?"

"What the drat happened?" I slowly pushed myself up, feeling weak.

"Two rockets exploded above us, on your shield we are assuming. You gave an awful sounding shriek and collapsed while the shrapnel fell," He peeked around a dumpster that was sitting across the alley entrance, "Bloody wanker had himself some artillery. The ghouls are coming out into the street."

"No chance of containment then," I shook my head, "Sewer isn't going to work. I'm going to head up to the roof."

"We won't be able to cover you," Michael's voice sounded in my ear, "We are barely keeping our favorite bits intact."

"I'm here to take care of the heart. Once the vamp dies, the ghouls will be more manageable," I went to a crouch, "Can you hold while I get in and remove his miserable life?"

"Go get him, girl," one of the soldiers encouraged, "Give him a good ol' kick for me."

A chorus of "Me too," "Save me a bit of his ash," and "Boot the wanker" rang in my ears.

I focused on my page teleport, looked up. Then as a stream of pages flew up the wall to the roof. Then shot across to the hospital roof.

I reappeared only to drop heavily to the surface. I had undershot my landing.

I straightened, scanning the roof for ghouls. Nothing.

The door was closed and as I approached, I noticed that it was locked with a keypad.

I slid a hair thin shield between the jam and the door, pushing the locking mechanism out of its slot.

Pulling open the door brought the stench of death, fear and blood up to me.

The cysting bastard had laid waste to this place of healing. He would pay.

I descended into what a nutcase would deem hell. Hmm, for once, I'd say this was Earth's version of it. Fire and torture had no meaning when compared to the stench and the knowledge of what awaited me on the lower floors.


	15. Flight and Fire

Thanks for the reviews. Per one I have added a bit more information on Alex.

Btw, this is a very hard chapter on Alex, but to be expected.

I do try to proofread the chapter before I put it up but sometimes I miss some minor things. If you see something like that please post a review so I can correct. I want my writing to be better. ;)

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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I couldn't scent anything under the waste of death. Having one less sense to hunt wasn't good. Alucard probably could smell beneath to other scents, but not me. It was silent for the most part. Occasional almost ghostly groans of ghouls reached up the staircase.

Down half a flight the staircase opened such that there was a shaft straight to probably the bottom of the building. A railing kept people from accidentally falling down six or even seven floors.

But I couldn't see down to the bottom. Emergency lighting flickered, throwing shadows. Some seemed to move. Shadows darker and moving when they shouldn't.

My ears pounded, louder and louder, blocking all sound. I was ... not scared.

Drat it. The dark lights had hidden my aura. Leaning against the wall, keeping my eyes on both up and down, I pulled the new gel pills out. Popping the lid, I took one of the easy swallow gels, dry swallowed it.

What was up with my head? My migraines hit swiftly, right away. This delay was strange. What was happening to me? Had my regenerator roots suddenly activated? Or had the sudden strain of taking two rocket hits overloaded my nervous system long enough that the migraine had come on after my body recovered somewhat?

Inhaling slowly to calm my thoughts, I froze. Spied something moving out of the door further down.

No emotions emanated from the decaying figure. A ghoul.

It was moving oddly, not at all like other ghouls I'd seen. The flashing lights then outlined the figure even through my aura filled vision.

Dust was swirling off the figure. But ghouls didn't do that in such small amounts. They either were decaying or exploding into ash.

I saw no wounds on it as it approached the banister, groaning as its undead kin did.

Then it went over the banister to plummet. I looked down as it exploded, the ash shifting down until it was lost to darkness. What the drat happened to it? There were no obvious wounds to its heart nor head. It shouldn't have dissolved.

Could a vamp dismiss a ghoul like hunters did in my game? Just snuff them out? If you weren't useful the vamp could end the ghoul with a thought? A snap of his fingers?

Did this mean the vamp couldn't hold so many ghouls under his sway? How many could Alucard hold? Drat me and my heart. Okay, I'd ask Alucard later about this. He was a vamp and would know the limitations.

Easing down the steps to the door, I peeked inside, reaching out to scan, even as my eyes blanketed fully with the aura.

No emotions, but I could feel a faint trace of bloodlust. Down two levels.

Hit the vamp heart and the ghouls were vanquished.

Keeping my back to the wall, I descended the steps by feel, eyes sweeping up and down even though my vision was unreliable. Occasionally I'd glance unto levels as I passed open doors. This vamp had proved himself good enough to attack from above. Wouldn't want to get caught and made into ghoul chow or worse, some punk's draculina.

It wouldn't be too bad with Alucard...cyst it. Focus on the job. Alucard was distracting enough in person. I wasn't letting him infiltrate my thoughts here and now.

The signature pulsed on the next level. My vision began to clear from my right eye.

I paused next to the doorway, noting the splintered jam, and what was left of the hinges. Someone strong had ripped off the door. Glancing inside, I saw the metal that had rested in the doorway. It was propped against a wall, with a doctor's coat hanging from it, as if a hurried professional had run by, carelessly tossing his overcoat on the door.

Hmm, this vamp had a sense of dark humor.

My vision began to fully clear as I pinpointed the signature straight ahead.

Emergency lighting on this level wasn't flickering for most of what I could see. Doctors had to work and a small thing like a power outage shouldn't prevent that duty.

"You've come along well, pretty."

That voice, even it cadence. Jacob? No, he died. That fire had cleansed me of his foul presence forever.

"Been too long to be parted," the vamp giggled, a more adult version of the one Jacob used in that institution, "pretty."

Alucard's endearment, though annoying, was far better. Judas Girl. Hunh, I wasn't religious so in a way I was a betrayer of religion. Judas. Drat it. Did Alucard intentionally use that combination as a joke and compliment?

"Nice try vamp. The one you are imitating had a far more convincing laugh."

A burst of emotion. Insult and drat it...he felt like Jacob. After the exercise with Alucard, I knew this matched Jacob's. If he was dead, was this vamp a twin brother?

Or had he gotten out of the fire somehow? Survived being burnt? Then who was the body left behind?

Note to self: Ask Alucard if a vamp could regenerate from being scorched.

"You are destined to be mine, pretty."

"Janice," the stab of pain in my heart was quickly overrode with anger, "was Jacob's obsession. Not me. Seems you failed your research, buddy. You got to be one of those religious nutcases who thinks they are reborn."

"Do not mock me, pretty!"

I smirked, "Ya know sugar, this sweet little ol' thing can't be a trophy bauble," I tried a southern drawl that use to irritate Jacob to no end. One of the condescending nurses spoke with it a lot.

The wall on the opposite side of the doorway exploded outward, rubble bending the banister down.

I turned into the opening and fired. The vamp dusted. Victory to Hellsing.

"Buh-bye, impostor."

My arm was seized from behind and I was thrown, my mind barely registering the second bloodlust now.

I hit a wall, then tumbled down half a flight of stairs to the next landing.

My left arm, the one that had been gripped wouldn't work, even burned with agony when I tried to use it.

"Alex, report."

I looked up into the eyes of the other vamp, "Silenced one target. Second target appeared," I had managed to keep hold of my gun so I aimed and fired. Second one dusted like the first.

Then I felt more vamps below me.

Rolling to me feet, I leaned over and glanced down the shaft.

"Do you really expect me to be so easily defeated, pretty?" Jacob's voice echoed from eight more vamps staring up at me.

Fuck. They were all one entity, sharing one bloodlust signature. I could only sense one vamp at a time. All controlled by one. This had to be Jacob. They were puppets under him. Fuck him and the ass he rode in on.

"Cyst!" I pointed, fired, brought up my shields.

Pain chased me as I was flung through a wall. I skidded across a smooth surface for several feet before running into and stopping at another vertical obstacle.

"Alex!" Mel shouted.

I coughed, tasting blood in my mouth, "Fucking asshats!"

I aimed my gun and shot again. Four more shots rang out and found their targets. Four pillars of ash collapsed.

Four against one. Much better odds.

I pulled the trigger again. Click. No boom. Cyst! Empty.

I popped the clip to drop to the ground as I used my powers to slide the next one out of the pouch. The aura was getting worse again. Drat it. I had never had the aura fade then return. What the drat was happing to me? Was I becoming more a monster?

I seated the clip by banging the butt of the gun on my thigh.

The remaining four vamps grinned in what vision I had left, "Pretty has a gun."

"Let me guess, you're going to say you're gonna take my wittle gun away, no?" I pointed and fired, bringing another shield up.

My defense shattered as I went up and sideways. Flying again. This was a recurring theme. Fire. Fly. Fire. Fly. I was glad I hadn't gotten the carsickness as my mother had a from her mother.

Once I had hit and come to a stop, I rolled to my side, pointed. Bam. One less vamp to deal with.

"Alex," Michael shouted in my ear, "only some of the targets dusted."

"Such spirit even now, pretty," the three vamps approached around the nurse's station.

I wasn't dying here, not with this odd migraine.

"She'll be out soon. The migraine wont let her continue, not with the drugs," the vamps muttered softly, as if to themselves.

Drugs? What drugs? Did something in my migraine pills not agree with my regenerator ancestry?

No matter right now. Survive and investigate later.

Snarling, I let my mind and his emotional signatures guide my next three shots.

The ones on the left and right vanished instantly from my bullets, while the center one leapt out of the way.

He landed and smirked, "Perfect. Keep fighting. Janice died too quickly. All mine."

He reached down before I could react, snatching my wrist and twisting my gun away from his body.

Warping my body, I planted my boot in his face, pushing with all my leg muscles.

"Bad move pretty," he grabbed my leg, pulled up over his shoulder, "I love femoral blood," his lips parted so that even with my blurred vision I was able to see his white and sharp teeth.

A single bite and, oh fuck. No. NO!

Shields were useless. I had to go to my new reason barrier.

"No teleporting, pretty," he flicked my forehead. Crack. My head bounced on the floor. I saw stars but refused to give into the agony nor gray vision. I forced the barrier to go up.

"Pretty. All mine. Not that pathetic loser who's Hellsing's pet," then he screamed, letting go of me.

I pushed up, scooted back against a wall, shaking my head to clear my vision.

All around us, my dictionary pages were pinned to surfaces. The vamp clawed at his face, dissolving. Then he was gone.

My eyes went to the page next to my face.

It had to be one of my Gaelic ones. It read:

Eughachd (vn) shouting.

"Alexandra Hannah Jones-Jordan!" Sir Integra's voice shouted in my ear, jerking back to the present.

When had she learned my full name?

I coughed, "Sir Integra?" I slowly got to my feet. If I hadn't had the barrier, I'd have been bitten, turned vamp.

My whole body trembled.

"Situation report," she demanded.

"Ten targets silenced," I spoke calmly even as I tried to stop the shaking. I was so weak to be this shook up over a stupid vamp. Even if he was mimicking Jacob...or was Jacob.

This was too much. Too painful. Too close to my old frailties. A little girl with no voice, no power.

"Help me please."

I whirled toward the speaker, my left twitching at the movement.

For a moment I thought I was imagining things. She looked as my younger self did. Except she had brown eyes.

She reached out to me, beseechingly.

Then her fingers dissolved. She had crossed into the area of my reason barrier.

My head kicked back into gear, finally registering her as a vamp. Two others flared in my senses. New vamps. Or in the terms of my game noobs.

"Alex, what is it?"

"Three more targets have been made," I watched the girl's eyes flicker from brown to red.

"You smell good," she grinned then. A little girl body with a big bad wolf appetite.

This child could have...would have been me. Years ago I would have ended up like her, too young to realize the hunger would eat my humanity away. Was I really different from her? Could I handle the bloodlust now?

"I'm hungry," she looked to a body laying half in a patient's room, "He's ice cream to your hot fudge."

Integra suddenly shouted, "I have already given you your marching orders, soldier. Search and destroy. Search and destroy! Leave not a single target alive. You will leave nothing but blood and ash in your wake."

The girl darted to the body and bit into him.

I couldn't let her do this. To continue as a monster. I would have expected Anderson to end me if I became a menace to humans on the whole.

"I understand, Sir Integra," I fired.

The girl's body shot down the hall from me, her dusting form leaving a comet tail behind her.

I stepped up to the room, shot the head from the body. No ghouls today.

"Two target's left," I muttered as I started across the level.

It was good that whatever collection of decisions that prompted this attack had resulted in both new vamps being on this floor. I didn't think my body could handle stairs in either vertical direction.

A sign, clear of most of the gore and blood that painted the walls read clearly. My stomach flipped.

Maternity Wing.

Oh no. Please. No babies. I don't want to know if my baby brother could have...

Please be a nurse.

I walked down the splattered hallway, pushing through the double doors, wincing at the needles my right leg was sending from each step.

The decision path had left me with only desolation.

I could look through the glass at the vamp. It was bouncing about the room, licking walls and bodies.

Hyper vamp baby. I didn't think babies could have moved with that agility nor speed.

Then it hit the glass, snarling, eyes empty of any intelligence, crimson.

I felt wetness trailing down my cheek as I pulled the trigger. Glass shattered, spewing shards into the destruction beyond.

The body hit one of the cribs. Blood and ash fountained up from the plastic sides, fell to mix with the blood from the other babies.

A chill was working into my body fighting with the pain for my attention.

I limped down the hall, tracking the final vamp. This one felt female to me. About my age. Twenty-two years old, give or take a few months.

I was getting back my extra senses, ones I didn't want now that the blood was on my hands.

"Alex, we are coming in. All targets down here are gone. Which floor are you on?"

I was afraid if I opened my mouth to answer Mel, I'd scream until it was all I did. The death around me was tearing at me.

"Mel, get up to the third floor. I think that is where she is," Michael responded.

"She's never this silent." the ear pierce suddenly was loud with voices, but I ignored the rest.

Last target. Complete the mission. I was a monster. This was all I was good for. Killing.

I was almost on top of her before I realized it.

She looked up, her hands on a man in surgical scrubs.

"Please, god. There are monsters. They bit me and killed the doctors," she had shorter hair in my shade. Green eyes that would match Anderson's. Her skin was bronze as if she was in the sun often which was too dark compared to my pale complexion.

A preview. The puppeteer was still out there. He must have quite the distance to not be on my radar. Yet he had left this. A reminder of things to come.

Put I knew that even if I didn't think there was a god or some entity out there looking out over me, she did. Most people did.

"Close your eyes, pray to god," I rasped out, "Let him set your soul at ease."

She laughed, a watery relieved one, but did as I said. Her head bowed, hands clasped together, and she spoke in latin.

I knew some spanish, and followed some of what she was speaking about. A prayer to be protected from evil.

Her emotions calmed, went tranquil as she recited.

I knew I had a few bullets left so I pointed the gun at her. This was murder. I was a murderer.

"Alex!" I heard in my earpiece and oddly in my uncovered ear.

"Amen," she said.

I shot before she knew what was coming.

She dusted with a peaceful expression.

I scanned the building for any other vamps.

None flared in my mind.

"All targets silenced. Thirteen in total," I spoke as the world seemed to waver.

"Alex?"

I turned looked at Mel's face which swirled. Picasso would have painted him like what I was seeing.

My eyes rolled and I felt myself falling.

"Fuck. Alex!"

Something caught me, lowered me. The pain increased.

"Medic. Medic to the second floor. Alex, baby, stay with us."

I was drifting already, even though I clawed to remain conscious.

"Good god, her arm. Shit!"

"Medic, coming up. What is her condition?"

"Her arm is visible broken, both ankles swelling, start of swelling around her eyes. Blood coming from her mouth and nose. Breathing labored. Fuck, she's going grey."

That couldn't be good. I lost my grip, plummeted into darkness.


	16. Wires and Hope

More reviews please!

I do try to proofread the chapter before I put it up but sometimes I miss some minor things. If you see something like that please post a review so I can correct. I want my writing to be better. ;)

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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"So you think that you can reject me?"

I blinked my eyes, confused. I was standing in the courtyard of the Rocky Mountain Institution and Asylum. How could I be back here?

Had I ever left?

"Jacob, you are hurting me."

Janice's voice.

I turned, faced the two of them.

She was going white with fear as he laughed.

Jacob's rough face was harsh with cruelty, rage and triumph, his grey eyes sparkling with intensity, "No I am not. Say it."

I opened my mouth, snarling, "Leave her alone, Jacob."

He smirked eyes never leaving Janice's, "When I'm done with you, you will wish you never had disobeyed me, Janice Lice."

"My name is Janice Sameson," she was weeping.

I started forward, intent on stopping this. If this was real, maybe I could stop her rape and death. But then what of Hellsing and Alucard? I wouldn't want to leave that life behind, even if it was all in my head.

Then I was on the balcony overlooking the cafeteria. How had I gotten here?

Janice's body flopped between the men raping her, eyes glassy and horrified in death.

Rage poured into me even as my eyes went to the far side, to where Jacob stood, his hands moving as if he was a puppeteer. He was smiling in victory while light flashed on wires coming from his hands.

His lips moved, and I heard his voice clearly, though I shouldn't have over that distance, "There goes Janice Lice. All parasites should be destroyed," his eyes rose to mine, "My pretty. Soon you will join me, won't you?"

"Never!"

Between blinks I was facing him, glaring up at his fifteen year old body from a much shorter height. Bookcases crowded us, stacked with worn and tired covers.

"You think the doctors and guards will believe you, my pretty? I wasn't anywhere near those men when they raped Janice. Just like you weren't anywhere near that guard when he broke his wrist."

"I didn't break his wrist. I didn't have the power to yet! This can't be real! This is the past," I shouted, desperate to get out of this.

This had to be a dream, an injury-induced psychosis, a nightmare.

"You won't tell them as they don't believe you about vampires," he smirked, "besides you'll be staying a long time."

"Not where you are, filth! Scum!"

The first blow knocked me off my feet to slam into the floor. My breath whooshed out and I lay there stunned. This hurt. No. This wasn't real. The pain was imaginary, a figment. Please, let this be a blow to my head or induced by a high fever.

"Too bad, my pretty. I will have to bring you over by force," he kicked me with his sneaker. I felt the steel he had added to it as it struck my ribs.

I skidded into a table, my arm snapping, prompting agony. Books fell on me from the stacks sitting on the table. My scream was young and girlish.

I curled around my limb, scared. He was big, several years older while I didn't have my powers. Not yet. Maybe not ever.

My eyes went to him, my mouth working without my permission, "Jacob, please don't do this."

The same words I'd spoken right before the library fire started and Jacob was killed.

"You are nothing. A pathetic child! Empathic, ha! You are weak, useless, helpless," his hands began to glitter with the barbed fishing line he used to puppet people, "To think that you helped the police catch that murderer. Then your whole vampire thing? Only fools believe in vampires."

I reached into my pocket, grabbing the lighter the guards had carelessly dropped in the hall on his way back from break.

"Vamps are real, Jacob. Just like monsters in human form," like me in the true present. This had been the first time I'd had killed a human. If I ended Jacob, then I'd go back to Alucard, and my badly hurt body.

I was caught in both places with a body pushed too far by pain.

"Jacob, let the doctors help you," I offered him one last chance in a soothing voice, "They can remove the urge to hurt others."

"Why should I be the one to back down? I am a god. They cannot defeat me. I have taken their own pastime and turned it into a tool. I will control the right people. I will be the power behind the throne."

I hid the lighter from his vision, flicking it on. The flame instantly flared to life, "Is any human life precious to you? Janice did nothing to you."

"She rejected my approach. She rejected my offer to dance. She was nothing. You reject me. You reject that I am your god."

I lit the book on fire, hoping this worked. I wanted out, gone from this ugly memory.

Twisting, I seized the unburnt side of the book, flinging it at Jacob like he taught me to do when playing baseball.

It missed.

He laughed, "So pathetic that a little pain and you can't even throw a book right."

I pushed to my feet, sickly waves running through my vision, "You are no god. A god wouldn't need to mock when he can correct. You are merely a human."

Flames licked up from the book I'd thrown, racing up the bookcase behind Jacob's back, brighting everything.

I inhaled. My eyes were on a set of bare feet partially hidden behind Jacob. Another person? He had killed another? Who would stop this monster? Wait...I didn't see feet before. Was this imaginary or had the Hellsing life been the fake?

"Start running, my pretty," he whipped his hand in an arc.

Blood seeped from my cheek. The fishing line was painted with my blood until he licked it.

The flames spread to the ceiling, suddenly roaring.

Jacob turned, "What the fuck?"

I ran. Ran out the door, slamming it shut behind me. I flipped the lock. Only a key could unlock it now.

The door thumped against my body but refused to open.

"My pretty? Let me out. I don't want to burn. Please. I'll be good. I'll never hurt another person."

His emotions infiltrated my mind, but they did so in betrayal. He was angry and scared. He didn't mean a single word of what he spoke.

I backed away, the distance allowing me to see his face in the little window.

His eyes begged, "Please, Alex. Don't let me burn."

"Just like you let Janice live?" I sobbed, then ran.

His screams raced at my heels, "My pretty!"

I wanted my life back. Even if it meant the vamp I loved looked down on me for my human weaknesses. I even wanted to see Anderson again over this memory.

Blackness ran over my limbs then my vision.

----------------------

"Anderson, you will not go to Alex. I know she is hurt but she must be given time to recover," Marvin's annoying, voice matched the expression he wore in front of me.

He sat behind a way too fancy desk. Vow of poverty? Yeah fucking right.

"Yer holiness," I felt grandfather's voice through my jaw which was odd, "She is na safe. Tis is the second attack focused on her."

"She is not one of us. She has decided to remain with Hellsing, our enemy."

"Is it na Hellsing who defeated the Third Reich? They be monsters and heathens but they have kept England safe. Now they are keeping Alex safe," Anderson argued.

"Safe? They endangered her. She is ours. Once she is recovered I will approach her again. This time she will join us."

"If she will na?"

"Then she is our enemy. Kill on sight."

I wanted to snarl at Marvin but nothing came out but Anderson's voice, "Ah understand, yer holiness."

What was all this? I must be crazy. To see the world through Anderson's eyes? Was I dying and my brain cells shorting out as they desperately tried to live?

----------------------

Pain woke me. I shouted, struggled to get up. I couldn't see, and my body wasn't responding as quickly. What the drat?

"Shit, she's awake. Hold her down!" a cold voice snapped.

"You expect us to hold down someone who can kill vampires with her bare hands?" Mel sounded astonished.

I felt the pressure pinning me from my shoulders and knees.

"Her shoulder just moved. Bloody hell. Its dislocated."

"Report Michael, Mel."

"Sir Integra. Alex is partially wake. We are restraining her. She has more injuries than we reported," something went around my neck, tightened, "At least she isn't fighting with her powers. Jesus don't choke her."

"Drug her. God damn it. Give her something to calm her down," I didn't recognize the voice.

Then I was drifting. My limbs relaxed and the pain faded to a numb throb.

"Where's the nearest hospital we can take her to?" Mel's voice seemed fuzzy in my head.

"Keirnan Institute of Medical Research," William's voice intruded, "Ask for Doctor Alina Fentonfield."

"She's spiking a fever."

"What's our ETA?" Michael's voice chimed in.

"Ten minutes."

At least I was back in this reality. Even if this was only a hallucination, it was far better fate than those memories.

"Has she stopped struggling, Ensigns?" Integra asked.

"Yes, she's relaxed now. She didn't use her powers."

"Her natural state is not with enhancements nor shields. She's, for all intents and purposes, human," Integra spoke sternly, "She isn't a vampire whose natural state is speed, strength, bloodlust and agility."

A small part of me was glad she was sure I was human. I knew I wasn't. I was a murderer, a monster under the skin that stretched my muscles.

I was happier though as I was back to my preferred reality. When I recovered I would have to try to figure out which was which, but I had a gut feeling this was reality. I was allowed a few moments of confusion, wasn't I?

"What you need to do is retrieve her camera and earpiece. Bring those both back to Headquarters. I want to see the clearer picture of what happened. This was not a random incursion, don't you agree gentlemen?"

"No bloody way. This was planned out. If Alex hadn't had a shield up in the beginning, both teams would have died instantly," Mel growled, "Then ten targets who each had sections of the ghoul army? This wanker wanted her dead."

"Or worse," Integra replied.

I felt something being removed from my ear, pulling some of my hair with it.

"I got the equipment, Sir Integra," Michael stated, "We are pulling into the hospital now. Do we need a cover story?"

"Simply tell Doctor Fentonfield she was attacked by a gang of humans while you all were returning from a security job. Do not let anyone know different."

I forced my lips open, "Insult."

"What, Alex?"

"Tell the doctor I insulted someone like a dumb American. The men jumped me. They escaped when you arrived," I coughed still fuzzy, "Considering I taunted...vamps...its not far...truth."

I fell unconscious to Mel's, "God, she's able to come up with a cover while this hurt? I think I'm in love."


	17. Reality and Kisses

More reviews please!

I do try to proofread the chapter before I put it up but sometimes I miss some minor things. If you see something like that please post a review so I can correct. I want my writing to be better. ;)

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

* * *

"Jesus, I've never seen a woman this beaten. She's lucky to be alive," a female voice spoke.

I so totally agreed with her. I hurt all over. Why was I awake so soon again? And was I awake in true reality?

"She's coming around again," Mel's voice.

Good. This is close enough to suit my sense of place. This was home. Yet why was I taking a trip down memory lane? Why was there feet in the memory with Jacob before the fire? Oh screw it. I'm insane and my mind is adding details now that weren't there.

"Miss Jones-Jordan?"

"Mmm?" I swallowed, "What?"

"We can't give you any more drugs for a while, Miss Jones-Jordan. You are metabolizing it too fast."

"Makes sense," I coughed, tasting blood, "How long have I been out?"

"Hour thirty minutes," Mel answered, "Michael had to make his report so we are taking care of you."

"Lovely," I sighed, "So what is the total damage?"

"Broken arm which we've set, you have anti-inflammatory drugs for the swelling. You sprained both ankles fairly good, and your wrist. We've relocated your shoulder in spite of the broken arm and see no problems in that healing. We are going to take you for a few scans. The blood from the nose is concerning with a concussion," the woman replied.

"That'll teach me to insult Englishmen," I coughed, wincing.

"I'd like to think we have thick enough skin to take a few American insults," a cool hand brushed my hair back, "Got a bit of a fever now."

"That's bad."

"Okay, fever first, then scans."

I felt myself falling again, "Okay, doctor. As long as I can see my new friends afterwards."

"New friends?"

Mel purred, "That would be us. The security team. We talked to her to keep her awake though we failed in the end."

"I'm here," I fell again. Drat it. I didn't need awake, out, awake, out like the cysting fire and fly repeating sequence at the other hospital.

* * *

I was striding down a hallway that was very squat. I felt as if I was going to bang my head on the ceiling if I didn't stoop.

"Father Anderson."

"Aye?" I turned and faced Hienkel.

"She's in de hospital. Our agent says dat she has Nightshade in her blood."

"Nightshade!" I was in Hienkel's face the next instant, "How did meh Alex get that in her?"

"Dat is a good question. The Archbishop says dat you are not to see her."

"Nightshade," I straightened, "He would give her the test too soon."

I turned and strode away.

"Father? Father! You cannot disobeyed the Archbishop," but the footsteps following quickly faded.

"He thinks that he is God," the growl came from my throat, "That meh granddaughter is expendable. Who gave her Nightshade?"

I was curious if this was simply my unconscious self trying to entertain me from the ruins that were my body and mind.

A man stepped out into the hall, passing me. It couldn't be.

I knew that face. From television. The face of a murderer. The very murderer that had caused the doctors to think I was insane.

"Father Anderson," the man greeted.

No reply from me/Anderson.

This was too crazy. I think my unconscious mind had snapped under the strain and my poor conscious one was already broken.

I stopped, and Anderson's voice whispered, "Alex?"

I turned and stared after the man as if seeking an answer.

* * *

"You are her fiancée?" the doctor's voice was shocked before she recovered, "My, I would have thought she would know not to insult Englishmen."

Alucard spoke, "I indulge her. I know she only means it some times. Others should have thicker skins or take it as would an unique experience rarely taken in stride."

Okay. This was creepy. I didn't think that Alucard would come in and say something like that. Hmm, crazyland your newest resident: Alex.

"Unique experience? Ha! Stupid Americans are one of the leading causes of bar fights. Thinking all us English are pansies like Britain in the Revolutionary War."

I heard him chuckle before saying, "May I have a few moments alone with her?"

"Certainly. We can discuss the test results afterwards," footsteps sounded away into silence.

"So Judas Girl, are you going to play dead all day."

"Just wondering if my ears were playing tricks on me or my abused brain. Fiancée?"

"That doctor won't let any but family near you. She even chased our captain away."

"I would have loved to see that," Alucard brushed my forehead with what felt like his gloved fingers, "Did we lose anyone while I was trying to play tag with the vamps?"

"Two."

"Drat it," I hissed, then had to relax as my whole body twinged painfully, "Cyst!"

"The doctor says your body is burning the painkillers too quickly to risk more until later."

"How much later is later?"

"I could bite you."

"I'm sure you could, but that won't stop the true source of my injuries."

"Oh?"

The doctor's emotions changed from busy and hurried to wariness and suspicion.

Great. She didn't see a loving couple.

My right arm rose, grabbed what felt like his tie, though it wasn't he usual bow one, plus it felt like it was made of fancy material.

I yanked him down, "You are tipping the doctor off," brushed my lips against his, then deepened it to a kiss.

Why did he have to taste so good? And this was the first time I had started the kiss, not him. Pity. It shouldn't have been because of a nosy doctor threatening to disallow visits from my vamp.

He chuckled pulling away slightly, "Perhaps. Englishmen are suppose to be very stiff."

"And Americans are prudes in the same vein?"

My vamp? When had Alucard become my vamp?

Embarrassment and shame went through the doctor before she retreated.

"The source?" Alucard was interested and excited. He must have noted the doctor's retreat as well.

"Those vamps were not ten separate entities. They were one. Either directed by a single source or the source was merged into each one. They shared the same exact bloodlust."

"So you couldn't sense the true number," at least if I was going to love someone he was a smart man.

"Not until too late," I wanted to frown, "What is so bloody important about me that someone would send ten vamps after me?"

"Your charming personality?"

I laughed then gritted my teeth against the pain, "Cyst."

"Did these scum say why they were hell-bent on you?"

"No, but he is mimicking someone from my past. Jacob Morrison. He could control humans."

"So he has downgraded to scum?"

"One problem. I trapped him in a blaze to be burned to death. The body they pulled out was his."

"Someone seeking vengeance on you for the death of this Jacob?"

"From what I remember of those days, he had only a grandfather who feared him. The grandfather never visited and most likely had him committed in the first place."

"Interesting."

"I don't think so when the result of it is me being hospitalized."

"We'll see. The doctor is coming back to chase me off obviously."

"If I am the target of this action then this hospital could be their next battlefield."

"Sir Integra has this place under surveillance, and," he chuckled, "Seras is inside."

"Inside how?"

"You'll see."

"Mr. Brennan, you'll have to leave now. She needs her rest."

"You'll need to let go of my tie, Alex," Alucard sounded and emoted as amused.

I managed to loosen my grip, "Until later."

The cloth slid slowly from between my fingers. The sensation was...curious.

"Of course," Alucard's presence departed.

"I'll let the front desk know he's allowed back during visiting hours."

"The men who saved me? Would you allow some of them to come visit too?"

"I will see. Now, try to sleep."

I dozed for a long time, coming awake when a new part of me complained with pain or inaction.

I hated being so badly injured I couldn't even defend myself.

I felt Seras' bouncy energy.

Oh good. This would hopefully entertain me.

I tried opening my eyes. The left one allowed my to see a slit of vision.

I thought I'd gone insane when I saw Seras in a nurses outfit two sizes two small for her bust.

"Ha, ow," I gasped at the pain but her expression set me off again, "ow, ha ha ha, ow."

"What's so funny?" Seras came to my side.

"I think you visited the wrong room. Didn't I order the handsome male nurse? Ha, ow."

"Sorry, its was the only one I could get on notice."

"Just don't let Alucard see you. I think he'll bust something from plotting how to use it against you," I hurt but boy did this make it less in the end run.

Plus, I didn't think my mind could make up someone on the fly like Seras who did something like this.

I could see myself thinking up Mel in a kilt though he'd hate it or Alucard with his sexy pirate outfit but Seras about to bust from her uniform...nope. Not in a hundred years.

"William is going to fix it once shift changes."

"So who died?"

She frowned, came closer, "Adam, a new recruit, and Jason."

"Had Jason tried to meet up with the others during the incident?"

"No, he was found in the tunnel. They think the nine other targets came in that way and he was taken off guard."

"Or the leader fled and Jason was in the way."

"I'll let Integra know about your idea on this, but your priority is to recover."

I yawned, "I hurt too much to be sleepy."

She giggled. I was amusing while hurt. Good to know.


	18. Visits and Offers

More reviews please!

I do try to proofread the chapter before I put it up but sometimes I miss some minor things. If you see something like that please post a review so I can correct. I want my writing to be better. ;)

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

* * *

Seras checked in on me at least once an hour. It was a comfort. The pain seemed to ebb with each beat of my heart.

Almost as if I was healing, but that couldn't be. I wasn't a regenerator like Anderson. It had to be my imagination or my threshold to constant pain had raised so that it seemed less.

During one of the breaks the doctor who had been speaking to Alucard came in.

Doctor Alina Fentonfield herself if her name tag was correct. Seemed Integra pulled some strings to get me the lady herself as my attending.

"You are awake again," she scowled.

"Hurt too much. I'm hoping you being here means I can get some relief to finally sleep."

She chuckled, "I am here to give you the next dose and see what happens. If you react well, I'll let you sleep as long as you can."

"I appreciate that, Doctor," I smiled gently, "I look forward to some quality rest now."

She unlocked the machine and pressed a button. Liquid dripped into the IV from the machine.

A minute later I was floating.

"Much better," I yawned my tense body relaxing into the bed.

"Good. Seems you just burn it up. I'll stay until I'm sure of your condition."

"I'm glad you are double checking. Means a lot," My words slurred.

I drifted, listening to the Doctor check the machines before departing.

The pain though returned after a couple hours. Ow. Why couldn't I get the relief normal people did from drugs? I wasn't getting the full advantage of better living through chemistry. Sigh. Lovely. One more point against me being human.

Then joy filled me.

Mel's bouncy happy emotions entered my senses.

Perfect. He'd distract me form my pain.

Ten minutes later I was looking up at Dr. Fentonfield who was not amused that I was in pain again so quickly.

"You are going to be a problem aren't you?" she considered me with jaded eyes.

"Nope. Just the drugs," I smiled at her.

She sighed as if I was a bother, "I'll allow normal visiting hours to begin in thirty minutes. You have two gentlemen waiting already."

"As my...fiancé travels alone, I'm guessing its Mel."

"Only half right, Miss Jones-Jordan," she relaxed, as if my manner was working on soothing her. Her drugs hadn't worked and my pain was the result.

"They'll be in once I've given them the lecture," she walked out with a hopeful bounce.

Someone was looking to get lucky.

I yawned, closing my eyes.

Next I knew I heard Sonny's voice, "She's asleep Mel. We have to be quiet."

"Mel?" I asked with a smile, opening my lids. Wow, I had more field of vision now. Cysting yeah! Vision rocks!

"Hey baby," I felt his presence lean in, "How are you feeling?"

"Like I've been hit by a truck. How long have I been out?"

"Doctor says a couple hours. You shut down after she left to let us up. She's been glaring at us in a very unfriendly like manner for staying."

"She said you were hurting too much to sleep," Sonny sounded worried but inside he was dancing in glee.

Boy, when I was mobile I was going to find out what the drat was going on with Sonny. I wouldn't tolerate someone who thought me in agony was a good thing.

Mel made up for Sonny's oddities with perfect balance inside and out. Worried and relieved, "The doctor seems to think you are on the mend. If you are on good behavior you'll be out in a week."

A week. Vulnerable and in an unsecurable building for a week. What havoc could my enemy do to me in that time?

Too many entrances to cover, too many areas to distract my protectors. All it takes is one slip up, one moment and I'd be...

"Hey, baby," Mel touched my forehead.

I blinked, "Did I space?"

"Not surprising with a mild concussion."

"Wasn't there a concern about hemorrhaging?"

"What?" Mel asked.

"Internal bleeding, Mel," Sonny supplied before returning his attention to me, "You checked out fine. They found burst vessels in your nose, likely caused when you took the blow to your forehead."

Mel chuckled, "You have one hard head, baby."

Mel's endearment was...well endearing me to him. He was so concerned as to my health.

If only the oddball captain would leave.

"If only it was diamond instead of marble," I grumbled.

"If its was diamond, you wouldn't ask for an engagement ring," Mel joked, "Though the one on your finger is sparkly."

What ring?

I looked down, half expecting Mel to say, "Gotcha!"

A thick silver band circled my right hand middle finger, with tracings of gold and strange carvings. Sonny's emotions spiked with jealousy and anger.

Mel frowned, "You didn't know you had it?"

I looked up at him then shook my head, ignoring Sonny's spurt of emotions for the time being, "Nope. This is the first time I've seen it."

He then smirked, "So do we need to tell Integra you had an elopement? Oh, oh was it an Elvis preacher presiding like you Americans prefer?"

I felt my cheeks flush, "You do that and we'll see how quickly the men believe me when I tell them you sexed up my voice and not my body."

"Damn," Mel looked away, and I felt his embarrassment, "You are no fun."

"I'm in the hospital. I'm not suppose to be having fun," I felt Dr. Fentonfield coming our way, "So, was your night quiet?"

"More we were all walking on pins and needles for you. You took quite the beating," Mel glanced over his shoulder, "She doesn't look happy."

"Glad to put some of those needles to sewing instead," I replied dryly.

Mel looked back down, laughed, "Don't insult if you can help it."

"I think the doctors have skins thick enough to handle any that slip free as drug and pain induced sentiments," I smiled back at him.

"Okay, gentlemen. Time to leave. Only family now."

Sonny opened his mouth. Mel Elbowed him.

"Problem, Mr. Smithins?"

"No, just worried about her."

"As a friend to her, trust us doctors to get her on her feet again. Considering her arm had a clean break and the swelling is rapidly dwindling, she could be out of here in two nights."

Sonny went dead, emotion-wise. A null area. I was so beginning to hate him and his mood swings.

Mel chirped in happily, "That's great. I can take her to the bars and teach her more insults."

I laughed before I could control it, "I'm sure my fiancé would love that."

"Mr. Brennan would certainly not. How you managed to get him to engage you is a total mystery to me," The doctor scowled.

To me too, if he told you the story and didn't leave me a hint to the cover story. Dratted Alucard.

"Fiancé?" Sonny growled, his emotions spiking in fury, "What the fuck?"

He was about to blow the whole thing. Hadn't Sir Integra informed him of how they got Alucard in?

I regarded him cooly, "Look, Sonny. The big brother act is a bit weary. Mr. Brennan proposed."

He swallowed his anger, trembling under my gaze.

Dr. Fentonfield chuckled, "No wonder she can insult so well. Come on gentlemen."

She had no clue as to what had nearly happened. Sonny hadn't been thinking of my cover, my situation. He had reacted. Blowing my cover would have made me get up and kick his ass right here and now...well maybe not right now, and cyst, probably not here. Drat it.

"Mr. Brennan," Sonny hissed, as if intensely furious.

Good. He was playing the game correctly now. Why was he acting so bent out of shape? Maybe, Integra hadn't briefed him before he rushed over? Must have been a communication snafu. At least Sonny "my friend" now looked like a brother figure in the doctor's eyes.

And the ring on my finger...that was problematic. Who had given it to me? Seemed a very odd detail to have put on me, unless it was protecting Alucard's connection.

The doctor returned, "I see Mr. Brennan found your ring and returned it. He must have dropped it off when he was here."

Great. The vamp wasn't going to let me live this down, "I didn't even realize I had it. Its new to me," had Alucard really dropped it off as she implied or was I over thinking this? Sigh.

"He'll be happy to see that you are wearing it."

And tease me on not even feeling when he put on the ring. Yeah. I was really looking forward to that.

I was betting he had also taken back his tie. I hadn't even had it a week and now I would have to sit here and wait for either to escape to a more secure building or get attacked and killed.

"You'll be out in time for your wedding, Miss Jones-Jordan."

I looked up realizing I'd been brooding, "I appreciate that, Doctor," I smiled in happiness.

If I had my way I'd be out far sooner than she was expecting. And my enemies.

"And tell your friend that he isn't allowed to sign your cast until he's made up with your hot man."

"Huh?" Cast?

I looked. Yep. My left arm was in a pale blue cast. Drat. I was missing details.

"Seras seems to have already become your ward nurse."

I noted the very girly signature on the blue material. It read, "Yell if you need - Seras."

"I just make buddies where ever I end up," I grinned at her, while inside I was thinking I was going to point out to Seras I didn't need a reminder that she was in shouting distance. Her emotions were enough to say that.

She was just down the hall, alert and vigilant.

My guardian vamp. Cyst, I'd take a vamp over an imaginary angel as my protector. Even a bursting from her uniform one like Seras.

"By the way did my male candy-stripper ever make an appearance?"

Dr. Fentonfield stared for a moment then laughed, "I figured with Mr. Brennan you didn't need one."

"All men want the hot woman for the nurse. I am like all the girls who want the hot guy."

"Most want the hot single doctor man with seven figure salary."

"I already have mine. Hot body would be just fine."

She shook her head, "I'll see if we can accommodate."

"If he wears a kilt, the better."

She sputtered, "Kilt?" she went red.

I felt my lips curled conspiratorially as I mimicked Anderson's voice, "Got a thing for the highlander, lass?"

She blushed even more as she stared at me, "Good god."

Anderson so deserved the embarrassment if he came face to face with the good doctor.

I grinned mischievously, "So do I," I felt my cheeks redden.

She rolled her eyes, "I doubt you could get Mr. Brennan into a kilt," she stalked out.

Now that was an image. Pity I knew Alucard wasn't a kilt wearer. That would be a delightful image to fall asleep to.

-------------------

I dozed for several hours, mastering the pain so I could relax at the very least, and not jump out of bed and go streaking down the hall yelling, "Drugs, more drugs," at the top of my lungs.

Then I sensed a man approaching. Full of himself, proud, confident, with a vague feeling of sneakiness.

Not a doctor if I was reading the last emotion correctly.

Visiting hours were long over if I was correct on the time.

I cracked an eye and watched my door.

It opened and an older gentleman stepped in.

I raised an eyebrow, "I do believe that visiting hours are long gone, sir."

He bowed, "For civilians."

I had this creepy feeling at my nape. This man had to be military.

"So may I know the name of my visitor or must I call you stranger?"

"You may call me Robert."

"Very well, Robert. What brings you to my room at such a late hour?" and when Seras wasn't nearby.

"I have an offer for you from an interested party."

"Oh?" I took a page form Alucard's book: Less words mean more.

"We are concerned with the safety of England and you could be a great asset in our group."

"Asset?" Not much better than slave like the Vatican.

"Your powers could be used more effectively with us. You could easily save millions of lives instead of hundreds that you are now with Hellsing."

"And your group is?"

He smiled, wagged his finger, "That is only after you join us."

I wondered if this was the political mess William had mentioned when I was sent shopping, "So you are offering what? A job? A different position?"

"A job where your unique abilities would be fostered, not stunted so you would become a monster."

Hmm. Interesting tactic. Alucard had been hot to turn me vamp, but stunt me? Nope. He was encouraging me to expand my limits. So was Integra.

"How do you propose I should grow pass the blockage? It could appear ungrateful."

"Nonsense," he assured a bit too quickly, "We are equals with Hellsing. We only wish to have our own human hunters."

"Do you simply hunt monsters of the supernatural persuasion?"

"No," he was eager now, "We protect from all threats to the throne. Not just those, as you said, of the supernatural persuasion."

"What benefits would there be? I would be angering a powerful agency."

Not to mention a nasty Hellsing vamp, have open season on my head from my enemy, and maybe cause strife with Hellsing and this military group. Plus, they may sell me to the Vatican for a favor in return. Those that steal from others are likely to exchange for other items. I wasn't barter unless I willed it.

"You won't ever go into a building without a team as back-up."

Lovely, human canon fodder. Didn't he know how deadly vamps were? Those men would hinder me rather than help.

"Your current weapon would be retained with additional ammunition made available for missions. You would have your own home, a retirement fund, a significant monthly allowance and full medical coverage for all bills, current and future."

So they could get Human's Fate or a gun like it? Hmm. Integra, you have a leak, or money talked.

"You wouldn't have to bunk with a vamp due to renovations."

"There is a plus to that," I agreed thinking on it.

"If you go with us, you will never be a hurt as you are now."

That was a lie, but he tried to pull it over on me.

"I...I would like to think on your offer. I seem to have time ahead of me," I played up the young and confused appearance, "if I may use it, sir?"

He seemed satisfied with my answer, "Robert. We are friends are we not?" He pulled out a card, "Here is a number you can call. Leave a message and we'll discuss this more and get your answer."

I took the business card.

Just a phone number in block letters. No symbol, no name, nothing to link these guys to a particular group.

"Do you offer training?" I asked politely.

"Of course," though his emotions lied. He didn't think I would be receiving training.

"Thank you sir. I appreciate your honesty in this," I didn't feel guilt from him. So he had been trying to fool me and thought he had succeeded.

Sneaky and liars. Great combination.

I held the card, looking at it as he left. He left without running into anyone else. Very in-and-out-with-no-fuss-no-witnesses attitude.

I was the perfect image of a person deep in thought. Cyst, who was I kidding. I was deep in thought. What was Integra's next move now that I had been approached with a tempting apple to switch sides? If I was religious I would say the apple of good and evil was worth breaking the rules, but this was far greater betrayal. One I wouldn't take. I wasn't going to upset the balance, especially as I was working with the official organization for hunting vamps and monsters. The knowledge and experience Hellsing offered on top of training outweighed the benefits the military group offered. Honesty wore down the face of liars to transparency.

Was I still in Integra's good graces? I sighed, setting the card aside.

I had obeyed her command. Given myself over to the monster, but was my version of it as good as Alucard's? Scratch that. I wouldn't ever be that close. Was I as good as Seras at being a monster? Even with all the enemies and problems I brought to the table, was I worth keeping?

Were my strengths worth my doubts? My questioning of my self?

"When you are willing to stop asking if you are insane," I jumped at Alucard's seductive voice, "and accept it, you will be free."

I glared at him, "I must be crazy as I didn't sense you were in the building."

Cyst. I didn't need him now. I wanted a few more moments to deal with my own internal demons before him.

"Do you like your ring?"


	19. Teasing and Weakness

Starving for reviews. Reviews, must eat reviews!

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

* * *

I looked at his wide grin. Oh yeah. He was enjoying this. Managed to pull one over on me. Though I'd argue extenuating circumstances and drugs that were messing with my senses. Yeah. That was it. Oh, who was I kidding. I had beaten him at one game and now he was proving he was still better than me in all other regards.

"I do believe that when an engagement is called, the woman gets to see her man put on the ring," I teased, "Though of course the man doesn't go for such a lovely and heavy ring these days."

I looked down at it. The carvings weren't as clearly defined as I thought, as if they had been worn away by time or worrying fingers.

My eyes rose back to him. Drat!

He was in my space, his too white teeth way too visible.

Wow. He was fast.

"Is that all that is not to your pleasure?" he smirked wider, into a shit-eating grin.

I looked up at my hair, thinking, "Hmmm, I'm sure I can think of more. Wasn't the norm suppose to be done over dinner? I know I've have a few head blows but I'm fairly certain the proposal is suppose to be over dinner."

A flash of irritation rang in my head before he became even more amused.

"We have dinner every night so that is dealt with," he purred in a seductive deep voice.

I smiled, "Hunh, isn't it suppose to be a special occasion? Not everyday a woman gets proposed to."

"I could go find a light human for dinner," he seemed to think on it.

"I don't eat human so that isn't gonna work," Yikes. I didn't think he was serious but he was a vamp.

He held up his fingers and...cyst he held the ring. I looked. Yep. The ring with gone from my finger. Drat it. He was too cysting good.

"Yeah. The new Hellsing game. Mess with the hospitalized human," I rolled my eyes though I had a moment to question if I was still human. Well, if I was using the definition that to be err is to be human then I was covered.

My hand was taken, the one that was below the IV.

His large hand circled mine. Hmm. My skin was only a few shades darker than his white gloves. Was I still a bit pale?

I sure hoped he didn't pull the IVs out. They would hurt, a lot. The one and only time I had gone to donate blood, some stupid very obese chick had wandered around where she shouldn't and well...I had to have stitches to repair the damage. Thank the collective human decisions a full doctor had been quick enough to prevent me bleeding dry.

Alucard leaned down, his crimson eyes on mine, filled with his brand of insanity, a mirror reflection of his mind chanting in my head.

His breath ran along my sensitive skin a heartbeat before his lips brushed.

The dratted heart monitor was beeping faster. I didn't need it to know that I was flustered. I knew my cheeks were scorching hot right this moment.

He smirked straightening to his full height, "Better?"

What? Oh. I looked down. The ring was back.

"We'll have to work on the dinner," I replied, ignoring how breathy my voice sounded.

"I'm sure our master would like to hear about that. What human would I like for a special dinner?"

He vanished.

Drat it. I sure hoped Sir Integra didn't hear about this. I was dratted sure she'd do more than verbally flog me if she found out I had given Alucard the idea to have a fresh human for dinner when he proposed.

It took several minutes before my heartbeat returned to normal and even longer before I was able to fall asleep.

Drat Alucard and his super sexy vamp ways. And my cysting body for having any energy to devote to libido.

------------------

I woke to Seras checking in on me.

Change of shift.

Her clothing was much better fitted now. She wasn't bursting from her uniform. It still looked a bit tight but not threatening.

"So how many guys are disappointed in today's look?" I rasped.

She picked up one of the hospital water bottles and offered the straw to me, "I still had three men grope me and a marriage proposal."

I sipped, grateful for the liquid, "Did Alucard manage to see you in the previous version?"

"I don't think so. He hasn't mentioned it."

Yet. He could be waiting.

"So, quiet so far?"

"Yes. Nothing stirring besides a few doctors and nurses."

"I hope it stays that way."

She grinned, "So do I. This is the slowest job yet."

"Practicing your phasing?"

"Not really."

"You should. Might come in handy. Never know when a crazy puppet vamp comes through a doorway," I yawned, "Drat it. I just woke up."

"Rest up. William is already set to feed up back up when you are back at the manor," Seras walked out with a wave.

More calories. Yes, please. I needed all the energy I could muster. My enemy wasn't going to stop just cause I ended up in a hospital. In fact, I was too weak to defend myself well. This would be his best shot to do whatever he was trying to do to me.

I dozed, waking when Dr. Fentonfield gave me my next dose of painkiller. The relief made point to how use to my body aches I had become.

After she left a nurse came with my solid food.

Hospital food was as bad as rumored. I ate the whole thing. I wasn't wasting food, even bland at best calories.

The nurse took away the food in time for the pain to return. Drat it.

I closed my eyes to nap until the next dose of painkillers would be administered.

Seras' emotions spiked with anxiety just as multiple people started screaming.

I opened my eyes, struggled up. My heart raced as...no, no. Jacob. I sensed one signature but I knew now he could have multiples.

Beyond the doorway, red eyes appeared, an occasional purple one flashing into view.

No. No!

A lithe female entered my room.

Her husky voice purred in time with fourteen others, "Your vampire girlfriend is too busy to come save you, pretty."

"What do you want? Jacob never wanted me for anything."

She smirked, "Ah, that was before your true powers came into bloom. You will make me the perfect companion. Besides," she sneered then, "that Hellsing pet won't have you. Your body, soul and heart belong to me, pretty."

My fingers clenched on the hand with Alucard's ring.

The puppet's face tightened in anger, "His ring won't last ten seconds once I'm done with you."

Okay, I was a girl at heart. The ring may end up not meaning anything to Alucard but a marking of ownership but drat it I'm enjoying the fact he gave me a ring. He might belittle me for being human, be superior to me in all but one facet, but he didn't actively try to hurt me. Break open the cyst, I was more entertaining as I am now.

If I became a vamp would I be as interesting? Probably not to Alucard. He had Seras and didn't seem to care for her beyond training her.

"Oh?" I taunted the vamp hoping that if I gave Seras time she'd phase in, snag me and phase us both out, "You think that your power is mighty enough to destroy this gift? Perhaps you think you can erase my feelings? Make me a mindless puppet? How typical. Every normal psychotic guy can't take no for an answer."

The female vamp trembled before she leapt at me.

My shield went up, holding against her straining form for a moment.

I just had to last until help arrived.

But my body couldn't handle it.

The migraine spot appeared then the shield began to curve in, caving to the Jacob or Jacob impostor's attack.

"So weak, pretty. You can't win," the shield shattered and the female grabbed my throat with her hand, "I will enjoy turning you, then fucking your brains out. He won't be able to take you. You'll be mine."

She squeezed, preventing my response which I think would have been, "Like you think your pathetic sex is a match for Alucard's years of experience," had I the breath to speak.

"You'll please me, pretty, and then you'll work for me."

Where was my help?

Seras' emotions spiked then went full bloodlust.

That meant she wasn't thinking. She wasn't coming.

Despair clutched my heart. No, no. I didn't want to be this vamps fuck doll. My hand reached up and grabbed her thumb, yanked viciously.

The joint dislocated and I was free of her grasp.

I shouted for help, hoping that Seras would recognize my voice and snap out of her blood frenzy.

"No one is coming for you, pretty. Your precious employer has her own problems. The Hellsing pet is in Ireland. Even your grandfather is in Rome. Too distant to assist you."


	20. Angel and Demands

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The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Then I felt the spike of rage that put lie to his words, "Oh really?"

She frowned at me.

"You are wounded. Your mind could easily fool you into thinking someone is coming," she reached out to grab my throat again.

She jerked as a blade shoved through to her front, "What?"

She began to crumble, "No, this is not possible."

A voice began to rise, a battle cry. If I had believed in heaven I most likely would have thought the angel of vengeance had descended, "Thou shalt break them wi' a rod of iron; Thou shalt dash them in pieces like a potter's vessel."

Jacob's puppet turned, "You are suppose to be in Rome, Father Anderson."

Then blades flashed by the doorway, curving oddly. Not a straight throw. This couldn't be a twist shot...realization hit me. Anderson had telekinesis same as me. I had gotten it from him. Well, good I have the source to blame it on now.

"Ye monsters are na hurting meh Alex," he appeared in the doorway as ash exploded around him, "Ye have ta go through meh first, ye heathens. Then ye shall answer ta our lord."

Jacob's puppet grinned, "Like you protected her from your own?"

Anderson merely grinned, "Ye are a liar and monster. Yer words are nothing. From dust ta dust."

Anderson decapitated the puppet, watching its remains drift to the floor.

He looked at me, "Alex. Are ye alright?"

"I think I only have a bruised throat. Thank you."

His expression softened immediately, "Yer welcome, Alex."

"Though I do oppose to you calling me yours," I teased.

He seemed sad for a moment before growing serious, "Alex, please come with meh."

"Why?"

"The Iscariot can protect ye better than these heathens."

"They are doing well enough. Your organization isn't helping me. They consider me an enemy to be killed on sight."

"They are na attempting ta kill ye."

I felt Seras snap out of her bloodlust. We needed to work on that. People would die if she didn't get control of her little rampages. Like myself. Or she might make ghouls and that was a very bad thing.

I looked at Anderson, "Yet they aren't treating me as a person, Anderson. I'm not someone to save. I'm to be used and discarded."

"That isna true, Alex," he sheathed his blades...scratch that...his bayonets. Drat those blades were long. Where did he hide them all?

"Father Anderson..." I began.

"Why canna ye call meh grandfather?" he asked.

I looked down my arm. The IV sticking from it annoyed me. My eyes trailed to the ring and my thumb rubbing as if to seek comfort. Drat that vamp for getting me something I'm now using as a touchstone, "I can't see you as family. When you came around initially, I saw you merely as a friend of my father. Then as someone who couldn't keep his word. You left us to fend for ourselves against monsters no one knew about nor believed in. My brothers died and you did nothing. My parents died and again you did nothing. Family act, protect, shelter. I just can't get pass that you did nothing for those you said were family. Your bloodkin."

"Ah dinna know until it was tae late ta act."

"That is the problem, Father Anderson. You promised me that you'd protect us. An oath that should have meant more. I take my promises very seriously. If I can't keep it, I don't make it," I looked at him, letting him see how deeply I held them.

His emotions spiked with shame.

Inhaling, I then asked, "Why are you here? I was under the impression that Marvin did not wish further contact with me."

He walked to the window, "Ah wanted...nay needed ta talk ta ye. Please come with meh back ta Rome."

I was seriously confused, "Why? I'll be just a baby machine to Marvin and his ilk."

He turned and looked at me in shock, "Na that. What gave ye that idea?"

"Marvin doesn't think of me as a person, an individual with her own desires and dreams. He's treated me as the church did to women before suffrage and equal rights. I'm property in his eyes. If I went with you, he'd make me the silent wife with a cold bed and 2.5 children while I'm forced to keep the house. I don't want that."

"Na ever?"

"Not now. Maybe in the future but I want the choice. I will choose the man to be my lover, my friend, my husband, father to my children. I want to choose that life when I am ready. Marvin will not allow me that right."

Anderson spoke in a harsh tone, "And if ye choose a man of Hellsing?"

"Its my choice. The rights of others end where mine begin. I may choose to have an abortion because its my body and no matter what the pro-lifers say an adult life takes precedence while the child is inside the mother. If I choose to get piss-faced drunk and kiss Sonny, that's my decision, though a bit scary. If I decide to punch a guy, that interferes with that guys right to live without threat of danger. Individual human rights go to the fore when you attempt to impinge your ideology on others."

He rubbed his head like he was getting a headache, "Jesus Christ is our savior. Alex, ye need ta hear meh words and na block it."

Seras halted down the hall, her emotions spiking with worry and fear.

"Seras, I'm alright. Father Anderson is here."

He stiffened, then he felt shame and guilt, "Ah'll be going."

"That's it?" I was confused. He seemed as if he was going to explain what was going on, "Why did you come here?"

"This is na right," he strode towards the door.

"Leaving me in the dark will get me killed. Ignorance may be bliss but death comes to those who are ignorant more swiftly than those prepared."

"Ah'm sorry Alex. Ah canna do this."

"Jesus Christ preached equality wether they were a child of god, a farmer or a king. Would you leave me in the blind when he knew his fate and still choose to die for the sins of humanity?"

The shame grew, "Ah canna say anything. God forgive meh."

"Anderson!" but he was gone, his pages taking him away, "Your decision then."

A tear plopped unto my hand.

I wiped its siblings away as Seras entered, covered in blood.

"Are you alright, Alex?" she came closer, "You have bruises on your throat."

"The vamp was trying to strangle me."

Dr. Fentonfield stormed into my room, "What the hell is the use of having a policewoman on scene when I have dead patients?"

She was furious.

She pointed at me, "Since you are the center of the gore and blood you have to be the target. And you," she rounded on Seras, "Don't try to play me. I recognize cop. Why didn't you stop them?"

"I...drove them away. They would have continued, sir," Seras looked down.

"Gave me a rookie, bloody wankers. And you, Miss Jones-Jordan."

I flinched, hunched.

"Call your fiancé and tell him to get his fancy suited self down here to collect you. I will not have another incident at my hospital."

"But you haven't cleared her," Seras tried to face the doctor's ire.

If I had telepathy, I'd have told her to keep her words silent.

"I'm getting the release forms now," Dr. Fentonfield whirled and left.

"Seras, um, what is the number for the manor?" I didn't want to be here with no plans when the doctor returned.

She'd probably wheel me out herself instead of wait. I was a threat to her other patients.

Seras pulled a phone form her uniform and dialed.

"William? Doctor Fentonfield is releasing Alex. We need a vehicle."

She listened then stiffened, "Then what should we do?"

A bad feeling was crawling around in my stomach. Had Jacob hit Hellsing? If so what was the damage? Was Sir Integra okay?

"I'll wait at this number then, sir," she hung up.

"How bad was the attack?" I swallowed the lump of fear in my throat.

"We lost three more, but destroyed them all. The vehicles were damaged. Sir Integra is arranging with another party to get you back to Headquarters."

What decision had I made or not made which left three more people dead at Hellsing and those who died here?

Had I made the opposite choice, would those people be happy and alive right now?

Was I responsible for these deaths?


	21. Descent into Justice

Hear ye, hear ye. Author calls for reviews!

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Sonny with a bandage on his cheek was carrying one side of my stretcher while Mel handled the other side.

I hated this. Wasn't there a rule that those discharged were done so in a wheelchair? Cyst it. I wasn't some lump of meat. I'd have preferred the wheelchair.

Of course I'd have tried pushing it myself which may be why I was being carried out in such a disgraceful manner.

They loaded me into an ambulance, shutting the doors before heading to another vehicle.

Seras was getting into an unmarked car that somehow conveyed cop even though it didn't look out of the ordinary.

So they were still hiding under the cover of being cops so the doctor didn't learn the truth. Sensible. Even though the ambulance and stretcher irked me.

I rubbed the ring with my thumb. Alucard's ring. Funny, how quickly it became a comfort to me.

"I'm glad," Alucard's voice startled me, "that little smile is mine alone."

I half turned and looked into the passenger seat.

He sat there in his fancy suit. He still looked unruffled. I probably looked like death warmed over. Cyst the vamp and his powers.

"Drat it, Alucard. I don't need a heart attack at my age."

He chuckled, "So I can scare you to death. Interesting."

If I had something to throw then I would have pitched it at him, "Stupid git of a vamp."

"Its all right, Miss Jones-Jordan."

I twisted the other way. My driver was..., "William?"

"At your service, Miss Jones-Jordan. It seems the Round Table would provide the transportation but not the men."

Was that because of the offer? I had the card hidden in my wallet. When I had a moment with Integra, I'd ask about "Robert" and who he really was. He was military and I wanted to know whose military to be sure.

Then to find out how we could take out Jacob and his puppets.

If he had ignored us he'd have taken over a country.

Or had he?

"The attack on Hellsing?" I asked before I drove myself mad with conjecture on Jacob.

"Later. Sir Integra wishes to brief you, Miss Victoria and Mr. Alucard on the most recent findings."

Findings? I thought on that as we drove away. I was scared. I couldn't handle this many problems.

The Vatican Section Iscariot.

Jacob, or his impostor.

Military man Robert's offer.

My own wounds and recovery from such.

Sonny and his cysting emotions.

Anderson's unspoken information.

My dreams of being Anderson.

Alucard offering every opportunity to turn me into a vamp.

Alucard insisting on fighting.

Cyst. Would he expect me to keep fighting him?

"William, will I be getting a proper meal when we arrive?"

"Of course," he sounded happy, "I've prepared a roast with whole grain bread, fresh apples, mash potatoes and a desert that I believe you'll enjoy."

"Thank you," high calories, here I come.

I turned back to faced the doors.

Next time Jacob came for me, I'd have the energy to tear him limb from limb...no, too fast. What would be a slow, painful torture for him?

For Janice I'd draw it out this time. Swift searing agony had been too good for him. She had been innocent. Her tormentor and torturer deserved worse than a flash burn.

He was a vamp so he'd outlast me on torture. Unless I used silver, sunlight, a blessed or reasoned weapon.

What of his victims since Janice? They deserved the fullest extent of his death.

Bind him in a room where the rising sun would burn him from his toes, avoiding the heart then burn up to his neck leaving a single path to his head? Then the last ray incinerating him?

Yes. Slow as the travel of time.

"Miss Jones-Jordan, I believe you are chilling the temperature."

I blinked, turned and looked, "Hmm?"

"He's not use to someone obviously thinking very dark," Alucard purred in amusement, "and painful tortures."

I raised an eyebrow, turning to Alucard, "I was?"

I hadn't been trying to be so blatant about it.

Alucard smirked, his glasses slipping down. The insanity in his emotions reflected in the crimson. Joy in destruction.

"I know that look," his eyes changed and a cold blast ran down my back.

I had a bad feeling that he was showing me his version of "I'm thinking torture" look, except it wasn't directed at me personally. Drat. If it really was directed at me I'd probably die on the spot or freeze.

A very cysting good thing he didn't mean it was me as the target. If I knew he was serious, I'd take the coward's way out.

"I doubt I'll ever reach your comfort level with such things, Alucard," I turned back and considered my toes.

Okay. If I wanted to do this right, I could ask the master torturer in the passenger seat...or fumble my way though it on my own.

"We have arrived, Miss Jones-Jordan."

"Good," I turned and looked.

The front gate was laying eschewed to the side, barely hanging onto its remaining hinge.

Blood and ash decorated the ground which a guard was washing away with a garden hose. Dust to earth.

"How many attacked?" I asked softly.

"Fifty before or at the time of the assault on you."

"Fifty plus the fifteen with me."

"Seras dealt with five," Alucard provided in a bored tone.

"This puppeteer can control seventy vamps simultaneously over that distance? Not good."

"A commander with an army," William supplied.

"We are whittling down the vamps. I dread when he goes to humans," I stated calmly.

"You don't know if they retain their minds once he's taken control," William pointed out as he swung us unto another drive before the circle, taking us to the garage, "They may be unrecoverable."

"They are human. If they live, they have a chance," didn't they? Or was I just deluding myself?

The ones Jacob used before had been unstable to begin with so they weren't a good measure of the effects his control had.

"So much faith in humanity," Alucard taunted.

"I think the strength in humans is far more powerful than anyone gives it credit. An elderly grandmother can lift a car from her grandchild. Who needs a god, when a single person can change the whole world with their fortitude and will? A man will take up weapons of war to protect his family, his country. A woman will expand her nurturing to tend others not even related to her. A scientist will look to the stars and imagine new ways to reach them. If there weren't these people, humanity would have died out long ago. The spirit to live, to adapt, to survive is strong. The old die allowing the newest generation to turn the path aside as pebbles do a river given time. Always with the hope the river twists to a better tomorrow."

"You believe in spirit," Alucard sounded like he was smirking.

"Spirit is an individual's willpower, strength to carry on in the face of adversity, their hopes and dreams. It is not a soul, an eternal energy. Nature doesn't have eternal anything. There'd be stagnation if anything in this universe was eternal."

"Interesting," Alucard chuckled, his emotions curious and intrigued.

I didn't reply to that as the doors opened while the car was slowing down still. Sonny and Mel unhooked me and lifted me out.

Again, I wasn't allowed off my stretcher. Drat it!

I was invalid. They carried me inside, set me inside the hospital ward. I guessed this was my first stop as they went to ask where to take me next.

I imagined others would enjoy the "kingly" service of being hauled around but not me. I moved under my own power.

Alucard hadn't followed me, instead joining up with Seras and Integra above.

Most likely for a private debriefing, before I was brought up.

It fit. I wasn't truly a part of Hellsing. I was just a...an empowered individual. Plus, I couldn't even defend myself. I could break too easily under the strain.

No, that was the insecurity talking. I survived. I had the will to defend myself. To fight!

To not give in to Jacob and his sick twisted plans for me.

"Alex."

I looked to the doorway, "Sir Integra?"

I was under the impression that she would have had me brought up to her office. Nice to not face her from across her desk while I was bound to this skimpy surface.

She was standing there, a bandage on her wrist and a butterfly closure over a cut high on her temple. At least she wasn't dead. That was a bonus in my book when dealing with crazy vamps.

"I just finished with Alucard and Sera's debriefings," she stood though I could tell she was exhausted, "What happened?"

"From what point in time, Sir Integra?" The first hospital? The second?

She blinked, then nodded, "Let's start with the incident that landed you in the other hospital."


	22. Debriefing and Memories

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Hear ye, hear ye. Author calls for reviews! *yes she wants to hear what you like and don't like.

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I started pulling back the past, "We arrived with the plan to have the teams distract the vamp and ghouls while I made my way through the sewer. We also found an electrical tunnel which was to be guarded by Jason. We exited the vans and made our way towards the point we would separate at. I...got nervous. The area was too open, a perfect spot for an attack from above. I put the shield up. The next thing I remembered was waking up next to Mel. The fight was already in full swing. Mel said I had blocked a couple rockets. I took my pages up to the roof and entered the building. It was dark inside, only emergency lighting. I realized my vision was blurry with a migraine aura so I paused. I took my pill then noticed a ghoul shuffling out into the stairwell."

I focused on that memory, frowning, "It dissolved slowly as if it was damaged but there was no obvious ones to blame. Its head and heart looked to be intact. I waited, watching it dissolve down the stairwell shaft before continuing the search. The first floors were empty. I approached the next one and stopped. I sensed the vamp. The vamp addressed me by the pet name Jacob used."

She frowned, "The one you thought you sensed on the grounds?"

"The same. He sounded like an older version of Jacob, had his emotions. I...I can't say for certainty if he is or not. The fact Jacob's body was pulled from the library ruins made me hesitate," I'd admit the mistake, "He implied I was his. I replied that he had to copy another to get an identity, but not the true emotions. Jacob was obsessed with Janice. This vamp brushed it off as if he didn't know what I was talking about."

"Or he didn't care as she's deceased. You may be his new obsession."

I flinched, "That's a possibility. One I don't like. I taunted the vamp with the accent Jacob detested. He responded in ager, destroying a wall. I shot the vamp. I assumed that was the end of the matter."

My left arm twinged as I continued, "I sensed the second bloodlust as I was seized by the arm and thrown across the stairwell shaft to the opposite side. I tumbled until I hit a landing. My arm wouldn't work. I reported that the main target was down and a second one was on site. I managed to shoot the second target," I shook my head, "I sensed more below me. When I looked eight more vamps were waiting. They all spoke together."

"You realized they were acting as one?" Integra interrupted.

I nodded, "I shot, throwing up a shield. I remember going through a wall, skidding across the floor into another surface. I think I swore, and tried to aim again. I got four of them, then my gun was empty. I took the time to reload. I was hit again, sent flying. I landed, slid. They mentioned I was going to be out shortly due to drugs. I was half blind with the aura so I used their emotional signatures to fire. Only one remained at that point. He said Janice died too quickly."

The horror tried to seize my mind and break me. I refused to give in, "He grabbed my gun hand, preventing me from killing him. I kicked him. He grabbed my leg to prevent me from hitting him again. He decided to bite my leg instead of my neck."

"A country peasant then," Alucard's voice made me jump and tense as his lips brushed my neck, "Nobles go for the throat."

"Alucard, stop that," Integra snapped, furious.

I turned my head and tried to shake off the effect he had on me, "I tried to create the same reason barrier I had on the dock. He assumed I was trying to run so he smacked my head. The back of my head bounced on the floor. I managed to get the barrier up through the pain. He made a crack about Alucard which gave me time while the barrier took effect."

Alucard crowded me, "What was the exact wording?"

I glared at him, "Why do you care?"

He smirked, "Indulge me."

"Why should I?"

He chuckled, barring his teeth, "Perhaps you'll entertain me better as my draculina."

"Alex, what exactly did the vampire say?" Integra stood over us, scowling at Alucard.

"If my head wasn't jumbled from the blow, he said 'all mine. Not that pathetic loser.' Of course that is assuming I'm recalling correctly."

Alucard snorted, "Such a challenge for a boy."

"Continue, Alex."

I locked eyes with her. It was easier to ignore Alucard when I was focused on her.

"He started screaming, letting me go. He dusted. I think I spaced a few seconds as the next I knew, you were shouting my name, Sir Integra."

The next part jabbed my heart and mind, "A little girl approached me, asked for help. I reported her a the first new vampire on scene. I sensed two others."

"A child? That does not fit. Why do you think she was turned, Alex?" Integra sat in a chair across the way, steepling her fingers, now thinking.

It seemed odd without her cigar in hand but I was grateful she had the willpower to resist in the hospital wing. Most smokers weren't so mindful nor so free of addiction to their poison of choice.

"She looked like myself at the same age, with the exception of her eyes. Her's were brown. Most likely he left her as a taunt and horror to be dealt with."

Integra scowled, "Your video recorder cut out prior to that. What else? The other two vampires?"

"The second was a baby," the sickness returned on this one, with the visage of that baby face grinning in bloodlust, "It bounced around the maternity ward room as if it was a super ball. That speed...it was a feat that should have been impossible for full grown humans. It was crazed on blood, licking it from the walls and then the glass..." I swallowed pushing the image aside, even though I knew my sleep would be plagued by it, "I destroyed it when it pressed on the glass."

Integra sharply asked, "Alucard, how can a baby be turned into a vampire?

She sounded as if this was new to her. A situation that the great vamp commander hadn't known about? Just lovely. What else had I run into that she had no experience nor knowledge on?

"It occurs. Bitting a baby of the opposite gender follows the same rules as a full adult or a child. Most draculs destroy such offspring to ensure the resulting feral dracul or draculina will not present a problem," Alucard's nonchalant answer said he wasn't surprised by this.

He's seen this before.

Oh cyst! My own brother...could...no please. Please let my baby brother be dead.

"Alex?" Integra stood and walked closer.

No more. No more horrors or paths to nightmares, "Then there's a possibility that my youngest brother was also turned. Even kept."

Her eyes flashed, "Then we will search and destroy. Him and those remaining."

I nodded. Clean-up. Anger rose again at Anderson. He should have dealt with this. Why are my hands being dirtied with this? Did Anderson enjoy my suffering? Did he enjoy breaking his word and seeking "God's forgiveness" instead of being a better person and doing the right thing first?

"Continue," Integra ordered, she knew there was one more.

"The last was a nurse. She was close to my own age, shorter hair, eyes more green than mine," Anderson's in color I recalled, "bronze skinned. She hadn't turned feral yet. This one I think was the threat. Look at what will become of you type of thing."

"I heard over the recorder that you gave her a moment to pray."

My eyes meet hers, "Just because I don't believe doesn't mean others don't. I gave her the peace she needed before I ended her life."

"Giving a peasant time to pray? How honorable," Alucard mocked.

Integra helped me ignore him, "You waited until she said, 'Amen.' You didn't have to."

"Yes, I did. Her sins would be atoned for if there is a god that bloody cares about scorecards," I swallowed the anger, "I did it so she could rest in peace."

I looked down, ashamed of the next part, "I...fainted as Mel arrived."


	23. Of Dreams and Minds

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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I'm back hopefully for some good solid chapters. Reviews are very welcome!

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"Passed out due to shock and pain," Integra corrected, "Continue."

"I had strange dreams then woke up to pain in the van. Mel I think..."

"What type of dreams?"

This piqued my curiosity, "Do my dreams matter?"

"Some drugs have strange side effects. If we know what type of dreams you had we can identify it better."

I thought on it a moment then decided she couldn't think of me any less than I was right this instant.

"I...re-experienced slivers of my memories. From when I knew Jacob. His fight with Janice, her death, then the night I burned him alive. Yet the last was off."

"Off how?"

"I remember looking down at the floor and seeing a pair of feet behind Jacob while the fire was beginning in the library."

"Any other dreams?"

I was embarrassed by this one, "I didn't like reliving that time so I think my mind made up the next dream. I was facing Marvin."

Alucard snickered, "A little fantasy about being one of the faithful?"

Was that the meaning of the dream? Ick. Was my mind trying to make me a theist? Lovely. Drat. Cyst. Stupid mind you must be insane to think I'm a theist.

"Please continue, Alex."

"At first I couldn't understand why I was taller in comparison to him even when he was sitting. Also, he was talking to Anderson but I couldn't see him."

Alucard started laughing, his teeth gleaming before he nearly doubled over.

I sighed, "Its wasn't until Anderson's voice came through my jaw that I realized I was Anderson," Alucard's laughter bugged me, "And no, I'm not a closet theist. If I had been, meeting you would have cured me," I said in a disdainful tone at him.

I thought he was better than those with faith. Except he mocked how I truly thought and felt. Thought I was a believer in atheist trappings. Well, this Humanist was really an atheist. So he could go fuck himself.

He stopped laughing, considering my expression.

I looked back at Integra and continued, "Marvin said he was giving me, as Alex, one last chance to join the Iscariot once I was recovered from my wounds. Otherwise I'd be a kill on sight target."

Integra snorted, "They can try, then fail."

I sighed, "Considering how easily the vamps took me down, I doubt I'm up for Vatican hit men."

"Continue."

"I woke up, started fighting. I remember Mel swearing, something about my shoulder before passing out again."

"You don't remember coming up with your cover story?" Integra's eyes narrowed.

I blinked, looked at the memory again, "True I did before I was out."

Drat, my memory was already having issues. I guess a concussion would explain it.

Seras came to the doorway, slipped inside, wearing her normal Hellsing uniform.

"American insult turned into a physical attack. Pity, that actually happens too often in London since the Battle," Integra nodded to me.

I continued, "I came to with the doctor seeing to me. They had initial concerns over internal bleeding and fever. I went unconscious again, dreaming."

"Jacob, you as Anderson or another?"

"Me as Anderson," Alucard snickered, "Yeah, mock the human."

"So you are human now?"

I growled at him, "Compared to you, everyone is human."

"Anderson again?" Integra prompted.

"Anderson and Hienkel. Hienkel told me...Anderson that I had Nightshade in my blood."

"How did they get your blood?"

"They didn't mention but most likely bribery or they own the hospital. In America religious organizations own their own set of medical facilities to lay claim to all sorts of stupid theories."

Scientists and doctors should cysting know better than to believe nonsense when treating people. More children die of religious beliefs than should be allowed. Like vaccinations are the work of the devil or aren't kosher. If we didn't have vaccinations then disease and illness would be spreading far faster and would kill more children than should be with our level of technology. If they loved children then do the dratted right thing and get them treated so they don't die of something that is preventable with our current level of science.

"Alex?"

I looked at Integra, frowning, "Sir Integra?"

"You stopped your report."

That wasn't a good sign. No distractions.

"Anderson got angry, no furious. Hienkel conveyed that Marvin ordered him not to come see me. Anderson mentioned a test and it was too soon to administer it."

"Test?"

"They didn't say anything else on it. They were concerned how the Nightshade was given to me. Anderson stormed off," A flash of the dream went across my sight, making me analyze it.

"What is it, Alex?"

Might as well go through with it now, "I thought maybe I was going crazy as Anderson passed a man I recognized."

"Recognized how?"

"The reason I was admitted to the first...crazy bin was because I was shouting about vamps and for an incident that occurred of which the police were involved. Due to my assistance they caught a murderer within hours of the death of his victim."

"I'm getting the impression this help was considered a nervous breakdown," Integra sighed.

I nodded in acknowledgement, "I sensed the murderer's glee in the slaughter, and his lust to do it again."

"You were empathic already?"

"Enough to sense him, but far from what I am able to do now. The police acted on my tip anyway. They caught him burying the head of the woman he'd killed."

"He was in Rome with Father Anderson?"

"I can't confirm where Anderson was, all I know is that I thought I had fully snapped and that random people from my past were passing by me...Anderson," I rubbed my head, "This is so confusing to explain."

Integra's emotions spiked in rage and vengeance, "Continue."

I had given her something, but what?

I had no inclination to question her on it right this instant, "I woke to the doctor speaking to my fiancée."

Integra scowled at Alucard, "That wasn't planned."

"Oh?" my eyebrows rose as I considered her expression.

Alucard started laughing. The full out "I'm a crazy bastard you better run from" roar of amusement.

"It worked but has caused other issues."

"Political?" I guessed.

"The Round Table apparently disapproved of your choice in fiancée."

"How would they like it knowing I woke up and thought I was still dreaming when I heard that?" or bat-shit crazy, "Or that it was Alucard who was the one who spoke next?" I muttered, "Dratted politics and vamps."

Integra chuckled, "Go on."

"There was some time before Seras came in with her disguise. We spoke and I found out we lost two at the other hospital."

She sighed, "Jason and Lawrence."

"On that topic," Alucard purred with anticipation, his emotions swirling with mischievousness, "That was one interesting look you had for the first day, Police Girl."

Seras went beat red, "Master!"

He had waited to use it. Lovely. Oh drat! That human dinner for proposal would hang over my head for weeks at least. Cysting vamp.

"Going on," I stated, shaking away the thought for another day's problem, "I met Doctor Fentonfield, also finding out that whatever painkillers they were using weren't working."

"Not working?" Integra stood and picked up a chart that was laying at the based of my stretcher, "It says your body was metabolizing it too quickly to risk more. Then how was your migraine medicine working?"

I shrugged, "Different chemicals? My body reacting badly to being this injured? I don't have the answer for you, Sir Integra."

"Or Nightshade was preventing something," Integra walked to a side table and slapped the file down on it, "Perhaps, the test you heard mentioned by Anderson."

"That's assuming, that what I dreamed as Anderson was true. I could be delu..."

Integra glared at me. I snapped my mouth shut on the word "delusional" and waited for her reply.

"The trust your family broke by sending you to an institution for insane individuals has made you cautious about your own sanity. It is not such a large leap that you are seeing through Anderson's eyes."

"By what logic?" I sure hoped this was good enough to assuage my worries.

"Alucard can communicate with Seras and in the past he could do so with a fledgling of a vampire he made."

I looked at Alucard.

How many had he made?

"Twenty-seven. Only one is living," he stated with a smirk.

It was eerie how good he was getting at reading my mind. Wait, he was telepathic. Oh, that's cysting lovely. He could be reading my mind right this instant. Drat.

Integra spoke again, "Anderson is your ancestor. You have empathy so its not a stretch to see you having telepathy, only that its limited to your bloodline if you will."

"As it only Anderson and myself still living, I'm connecting with him. Then why wasn't I able to do so to Jeremy?"

"He was a vampire. They run on different rules."

The baby vamp, creepy and so wasn't running on the same rules as myself.

"This is distracting," I sighed, "I don't like walking around in Anderson's body."

"Yet, we have intel that our agent didn't give us. You are being poisoned with Nightshade, you may be encountering some test in the near future. Marvin will declare you an enemy to his agents and must be killed if you don't join them," she smirked, "And his desk isn't as plain as he claims to the rest of the Vatican."

"It could also back-fire," Seras spoke, drawing all our gazes.


	24. Report and Storm

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

* * *

I'm back hopefully for some good solid chapters. Reviews are very welcome!

* * *

"How so, Seras?" Integra inquired.

"The telepathy between me and Master goes both ways. Anderson could be watching through her eyes."

Alucard was in my face next, "Then he'll enjoy this."

His lips where pressed hard on mine.

I pushed him away with my good arm, "Cut it out, Alucard."

Even though it gave me a little thrill. Drat. Bad hormones. Down.

I scowled at him, "We don't know if its dual path or not. Anderson doesn't have empathy. Its possible he can't see through my eyes as I do his."

Integra looked at Alucard with a small smile, "I'm sure if he was watching right now, he'll be on a war path to us shortly."

"Lovely," I edged away from Alucard as he leaned in again, "There's more to my report, so back off."

"Please do continue, Alex. Alucard, give her some space."

He sat beside me but wasn't leaning so close. Oh well.

"Mel and Sonny were able to visit and told me a bit more. I found out I was going to be released in a week."

"So our enemies thought to attack quicker than later. Distract us so we weren't able to deploy to the hospital. Five vampires to distract Seras. The rest on you," Integra locked her gaze on a painting hanging on the wall.

"It also means his distance is not as limited as I thought, if he is indeed Jacob. He had to be equidistant between the two locations," I stated.

"Unless he's working with another person of similar abilities. He could have taught his trade to a subordinate," Integra took off her glasses rubbed her nose, "Go on."

"I was visited later by someone who didn't want to be seen by the hospital staff."

Integra turned, "Who?"

"Said to call him Robert. He gave me a number to call," I pulled over my wallet and took out the card.

She took the rather blank card, examined it, "Describe him."

"Military in bearing and manner, sneaky, liar," I tried to pull back his physical appearance, "Older, thin. Had the look of a commander and not a grunt. Eyes that have seen too many wars and disappointments."

"Rob Walsh," she sighed, "He's the military branch of the Round Table. Seems he is looking to expand his forces."

"He implied that he'd," I smiled, "put my talents to save more lives than Hellsing. Curious. Also he lied about further training."

Laughter filled the room from Integra, "You are a walking lie detector."

"For those who try to hide it with words I can find out most who lie."

She looked at me with critical eyes, "Who can't you read or get mixed signals from?"

"Alucard. Sometimes I can't read due to the insanity blocking most of the emotions for lies or truths. Sonny I know doesn't sound like what he's feeling most of the time."

She frowned, a sliver of wariness coming into her emotions, "How so?"

"For instance while he was visiting in the hospital he was acting as if was worried on my injuries, but inside he was gleeful. He's done this twice before. It could be he simply has emotions he's suppressing due to random thoughts that I can't pick up on or he's intentionally being deceptive."

"Has he acted on those emotions?"

"He did once so far. He was extremely upset over the ring. I had to act to waylay the doctor's suspicions by making him into an overprotective brother figure."

"Why so upset over a ring?" Integra looked to Alucard, "Is it possible Sonny is jealous of Alucard?"

"He seems to emote that way. He acts as if I'm dating him," I humphed, "Stupid git."

"Seras, go find Sonny and bring him to me. I want to talk to him. Continue, Alex."

Seras saluted and rushed out.

"Seras checked in before I was given a dose of painkiller when Doctor Fentonfield felt it was safe to do so. I was also allowed a meager meal. I heard the screams before I sensed the attackers."

"A single bloodlust again?" Alucard asked.

I nodded, "I saw multiple eyes but only one entity was in control. A female vamp lead the group on me."

"Female?" Integra seemed alarmed by that, "Are you certain?"

Nit-picking the memory I replied, "The voice, gait and...bosom were female, but surgeries pre-vampism could have made him a her."

"Her hands?"

"Soft, manicured," I remembered a scent, "She was wearing perfume, something that the fancy smancy places have. Definitely not cologne."

"Why bring a female to the hospital? You would be dead," she was worried now.

"Why?"

"Vampire 101 as you Americans would call it," she smirked at my confused looked, "You'll need to do the basics. Vampires can only make one of their own if the one they are turning is of the opposite gender."

I was alarmed, "I would have been turned into a ghoul?"

"So this Jacob must not know either if he truly brought a female to turn you."

Getting myself turned vamp on purpose was bad, but being destroyed in my entirety because of ignorance...that was unacceptable.

Shaking the thoughts off, I went on with my report, "Jacob's puppet grabbed my throat. Jacob said that you were busy, Sir Integra, and Seras wasn't able to help me. I sensed when she went into bloodlust. He also said Alucard was in Ireland and Anderson was in Rome."

"He knew us but hadn't gotten the latest on Anderson."

"I was grateful for that. The vamp had shattered my shields so I was defenseless. Dratted hospital food. I dislocated her thumb and got free of her. The puppet backed off. Anderson's blade hit her, making her start to dissolve."

"Around the doorway?"

"Yes. He destroyed the other vamps and the ghouls that were brought with some curving blade attack."

"Did the puppet say anything?"

"She said something about Anderson not protecting me from his own. Not sure what she meant. I was happy to be alive. If I had known the danger I'd have been a lot more relieved," I really needed an in-depth study of vamp...reproductive options, "Anderson decapitated the female vamp."

"Did Father Anderson say anything?"

"We had a few words but I got the impression he was going to tell me something of importance. Seras snapped out of her bloodlust and came running towards me. She realized he was there. I called out to her that it was alright. Anderson shut down," Integra frowned, "Clammed up. What he was going to say is now unknown. I admit I got heated and said a few unwise words when I realized he had decided to withhold the information and leave me in ignorance."

"What exactly did you say?"

"Jesus was told he was going to die and why. He still choose to follow through. He also preached equal rights for the peasant and the king so therefore..."

"You deserved to know what you were going to be martyred for," Alucard started laughing manically.

"I was going to say I deserved the same respect."

Seras' emotions went worried and angry.

"Sonny isn't here anymore," I stated.

"How do you know?" Integra looked me, scowling, "Seras is feeling, she's lost him?"

"Something along those lines."

Seras dropped from the ceiling in the hall to the floor heavily, "He's not on the grounds. Left about ten minutes before I went looking for him."

"He knew," I looked around the room, "Do you sweep for bugs?"

"I will order one. So our traitor was Sonny?"

"He could be with Jacob or he is another party's spy. Rob? The Vatican?" I rubbed my sore shoulder, "You could have more."

"Sonny realized you had him uncovered as being untruthful and lit out?" Seras frowned.

"That or something bad is about to happen and like any rat, he's jumping ship."

"Alucard, search the grounds. Seras, the manor. Alex," Integra handed me a phone. No, my phone, "Keep an ear to the feelings. Call if you feel any spikes from our enemies."

"Yes, sir," Seras and I replied.

"As you command, my master," Alucard faded away.

Integra strode out, Seras following, "I'll have a talk with Sir Irons on his background checks."

"Change all your codes and security. Sonny knew all of it," I reminded, "Be a pity to let his knowledge profit him."

"William will bring down three meals worth of food. Eat it all, Alex. I will deal with Sonny and security."

There was the implied "get back on your feet."

She vanished down the hallway, out of my sight.

Several minutes passed. The eye of trouble. The shit storm was about to hit the fan.

"Grandfather, why didn't you tell me everything while you had the chance?"

"Because he's a man of God."

I looked to the doorway with shock and fear.

Sonny stood there.

Cysting fuck!


	25. Helpless and Cornered

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

* * *

I'm back hopefully for some good solid chapters. Reviews are very welcome!

* * *

"You are too weak to fight me," his gun was trained on me, "Drop the phone."

"Why are you doing this?"

"I don't know how the monsters got my codes to enter the estate but that won't stop my mission."

Fanaticism took hold of his mind.

I let go of the phone slowly. Cyst. He was the Vatican spy...maybe also Jacob's human puppet, "Why are you doing this? I haven't done anything to hurt you."

"You are marrying that monster. I must save your soul."

"I don't have a soul."

"You are human," he shut the door at his back, "You have a soul to rescue from damnation," the lock clicked.

I was locked in a room with a crazy Vatican spy with no shield nor ability to escape. I doubted I had the energy nor time to take the paper in the room to teleport away. Why was I in this place? What turn did I travel by mistake?

"I don't think there is a God. You can't save me," what could I do?

"You will be."

"The fiancée thing was to get vital information from me Sonny. Nothing more."

"Then why is the ring still on your finger?"

"Because Alucard is an ass and its easier to wear it instead of hear his snarky comments for the next month."

"Then you'll remove it."

I had to move my casted arm over so I could slip the ring from my finger. The IV was still in my good arm.

Slipping the ring off, I gently set it on the side table, "Is that better, Sonny?"

"He'll tempt you into Hell."

"I fear becoming a vamp, Sonny. Even at his hands. If he tried to turn me vamp, I'd kill him or force him to kill me," I snapped in anger, "Why are you avoiding the real threat to my soul? The Puppeteer?"

"We are dealing with him," he moved towards the IV bag, "You are being given the greatest gift we can bestow."

"What gift? To be a slave as Moses's people to the Egyptians?"

He lashed out. I tasted blood in my mouth once it was over, my face pointed towards my lap. The heat in my cheek and side of my mouth was burning as much as my shame at being unable to defend myself.

"Do not associate us with those scum."

"You are taking my right to live life as I wish away. Just like them. You are condemning me to damnation on this mortal coil. How can God forgive me if I meekly accept this?" I raised my eyes to his gaze, keeping my voice soft, "I must suffer the lost of virginity, childbirth and the disdain of men. Why add that my choices are taken away from me? Those simple pleasures of the soul that make this life worth living?"

"You will have many once you are one of us."

"I don't want to be one of you. I have lost my parents, my older and younger brothers. What have you ever done to protect and cherish me?" tears fell from my eyes, "What have you done to prove yourselves the true men of God?"

Sonny seemed to consider me, his fanaticism battling with the sense of right and wrong.

I wished Alucard was here. I couldn't last with Sonny. I was a simple human. A bullet would kill me a surely as a normal human.

I looked down at my lap, "I am laying here, wounded from fighting monsters. Yet you have no single scratch. I have suffered more than is worth living for. You would take my last reason for continuing on?"

I felt Seras' bundle of emotions coming down the hall, the focus changing instantly to alarm. Please, let whatever training Seras decided to take had her noticing that the door was shut when it shouldn't.

"God has plans for you. You will be given a sacred duty," Sonny stated his indecisiveness dissolving under his fanaticism.

"Then you are no better than the monsters that put me here. Those demons who disrespect human life," I glared at him, "You are not a man of God."

Seras phased through the wall, caught sight of Sonny. I kept my eyes on him, as I said the last words, "You are not the righteous man Jesus died for."

"You will serve then to make pure children."

In a flash he turned and shot Seras as she leapt to tackle him. She was launched back into the wall, spraying blood.

He took a step towards her, "I will eliminate the monsters in your life."

I yanked out the IV needle, wincing at the pain and the blood coming from the wound. I couldn't wait. He lined up his second shot. One to Seras' head.

I lunged from the bed, across to Sonny's back.

I put all my strength behind the needle as it slid into his shoulder. His arm went limp, dropping the gun as Seras collapsed to her side.

My ankles took my weight for a couple seconds then buckled, dumping me to the floor. Sonny roared above me in pain.

"Master!" Seras cried out, struggling to get to her hands and knees.

Sonny whirled to me, lashed out with a silver object. A knife?

I raised my good arm to protect my face and chest.

Pain exploded in my arm, searing and agonizing.

My shriek rang against the stone walls as Sonny pulled the weapon from my arm, raised it to deliver another blow.

His head exploded with a loud boom that left me deaf.

Alucard rushed to Seras as Mel and Michael burst through the door.

I watched in shock as their months moved but no sound echoed in my ears save an annoying ringing.

Mel pressed a hand over my wound. I screamed though I could only feel it in my jawbone. I tried to jerked my arm free as the burn increased.

My jaw was seized and I was looking into Alucard's eyes. A small measure of calm returned with some of my hearing.

"Get the Medic!" Mel barked, "Shit! She's bleeding badly. He must have hit an artery."

He tried to cover the wound again.

Fire raced through my arm. I kicked out, knocking him back before I could stop the action. It hurt too much.

Alucard gripped my arm with implacable strength, putting a hand on my shoulder, "Treat her quickly."

"Oh god, look at the wound."

I glanced down.

My flesh was..."No. Stop it!" I shouted, fear racing my heart.

The flesh was dissolving as if acid was eating at the edges of the raw meat, widening the gash rapidly.

"In the Queen's name," Integra's shocked voice drew my gaze.

She took one look at my face, the wound, then her eyes hardened, "Alucard amputate her arm."

I had a moment to think "What the fuck?" before my arm didn't hurt any more.

I didn't want to look down. I didn't want to see and be forced to acknowledge the truth. I closed my eyes. Don't look. Maybe my memories were a better place to be than this. If I didn't see it, it wasn't true. It was childish but if it kept me sane for a few moments longer I'd take it.

"Jesus. What the bloody hell did they do to her?"

I opened my eyes curiosity overriding my need to avoid the sight.

The limb from fingers upper arm was like a mannequin's with holes spreading almost from the bone outward to the skin.

That couldn't be my arm. It didn't look like it was made of flesh.

I was picked up, and carried backwards from the limb as it spilled goo across the floor.

Bone showed through the holes, white and clean of flesh, like a dog's chew toy. Then the strange holes appeared in the white surface.

If...if Alucard hadn't...I looked at my shoulder. Shadows covered the space where my arm should have connected to my torso.

"She's going into shock," was the last thing I heard.


	26. Hiding from the Present

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

* * *

I'm back hopefully for some good solid chapters. Reviews are very welcome!

* * *

"The cells in the culture are regenerating just at a slower rate, Father Anderson. She's like a mild version of yourself."

A twinge in my right arm made my left to raise and rub. There was a shoulder there. No...not mine. Anderson's.

"She be only as she is, Sister Kate?" Anderson's voice echoed in my jaw and ears.

Sister Kate? Was she a doctor?

"She wouldn't benefit from the test. In fact, the risks in the test would out-weigh any chance of increasing her healing ability. She's all she'll ever be."

I decided I'd hide in Anderson's body and reality. It was better than facing my own life right this instant. I needed to not have the misery that waited me.

The red-haired lady looked up at me...us, "She'll definitely produce children with the trait, but we'll need to find someone whose regenerator capabilities are higher than hers."

"Have ye told his holiness, the Archbishop, of this, Sister Kate?"

"I'll call him now. She's a beauty, Father Anderson. You should be proud," she picked up the hand set of her phone and dialed, "She would be a pleasure to work with on the next generation."

She seemed okay. Not pushy nor excessively egotistical.

Maybe if I survived the removal of my arm, we could talk, with Integra's permission of course. Maybe if I gave the appearance of being reasonable they'd stop trying to kill, infect or convert me. Wait, this was the Vatican. They wouldn't stop.

"Your holiness," she greeted the person on the phone, "I have just concluded my research on Alexandra...What?" she sat up straight, "but your holiness I did not authorize this action."

"What has happened?" I leaned closer, trying to listen, "Is meh Alex alright?"

"Your holiness, she wouldn't be gaining enough to warrant this. She could die...having it introduced to her through an IV is not correct method for injection. Your holiness...you just reduced her chances," she hung up as my hand reached out to take the set.

She stared at her screen, deep in thought.

"What happened ta meh Alex, Sister Kate?" Anderson's voice was tinged with worry and my body was tense.

"He authorized our agent to administer the test solution to her IV. It...its too late to stop it. When..." she turned to me, tears in her eyes, "her flesh will melt faster than she can heal it. Unless someone there was quick enough to remove the affected flesh and bone..."

"Ah'm leaving."

I turned and walked towards the door.

"Father Anderson, please wait."

"Why? Meh Alex...if she survived ah need ta be there."

"Our agents collected samples of her. If she didn't survive then we can use in-vitro to save the bloodline."

Anderson was quiet for some time, "Thank ye Sister Kate. If she dinna survive ah'll be back ta oversee their raising. If ah donna come back...destroy all samples."

"Destroy them? Why?"

"Ah know ah can raise them right. Ah donna trust the rest ta do so. Na with what has happened. They dinna act with God's wisdom," he muttered in a low voice that I think only he and I could hear, "Greed and lust is where they act from. Meh Alex dinna deserve this."

Why was he destroying the regenerator line? If there was a possibility of new children coming from his blood wouldn't he want them to be born and have a chance at live? Or was it he simply didn't believe in in-vitro fertilization? I knew a devout Christian back in the States that was so crazy she actually forced a perfectly good Family Planning Shelter to be shut down, all due to her beliefs being threatened.

Sister Kate inhaled, "You may be right. I'll wait until I hear further news, Father Anderson. Until then I'll secure the samples in a private location. If I did anything else I would not be grateful for your timely rescue of my own children."

I nodded...Anderson nodded, then stalked out.

"Ah'm so sorry, Alex. Ye were right. Ah should have told ye everything while ah had the moment. Ye may have been martyred fer nothing."

I looked up at the stars. Stars? Was it that late? I got the impression that when I was finished with debriefing Integra it was early morning. Now it was night again. I had survived the night? Was that a good sign?

"If ye survived, ah'll tell ye, Alex. Please God. Let meh Alex ta have lived."

If I was still dreaming I had to still be alive. But without an arm I was far more vulnerable to attacks now. The other was casted and would be next to useless. Oh drat. My game. I couldn't play one handed.

Cyst. All you vamps and Vatican thugs, drat you and the mules you rode in on.

"Alex?" I whirled, my eyes scanning the distance. No, Anderson's eyes did so. Had he sensed me?

"Grandfather?" I tried to ask, but I felt myself losing my grip on consciousness.


	27. Closing the Edges

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

* * *

I'm back hopefully for some good solid chapters. Reviews are very welcome!

* * *

Pain shot through my shoulder.

No relief came so I tried to grab whatever was trying to eat my arm and yank it away from me.

My arm was stopped by resistance.

My heart pounded. Was I in the institution? Wait, where was I? This didn't smell of a hospital.

"She's coming around. Alex? You have to stay still," Michael's voice ordered.

A whimper passed my lips as I struggled to get through the pain and wake.

"I know it hurts, baby," a strong hand covered my hand which wasn't attached to the pain.

Mel continued, "We are right here."

I opened my eyes, flinching at the blinding light. My mouth was parched and my skin was coated in cold sweat.

"What happened?" I rasped trying to think.

"Gary is working on your shoulder."

Memory flooded back to my head, "Its gone, isn't it?"

I couldn't deny my arm was gone. Permanently. No reattaching a goo to the end of my healthy body. Please, why was this happening?

"Yeah, baby. You would be dead if we...if Alucard hadn't done as Integra ordered."

Panic was trying to claw up my throat, "Yeah," I looked at him, "Please ignore any emotional outbursts."

Mel smiled sadly back at me, "Its okay, baby. We know you aren't a wimp."

I chuckled for a few seconds before a vicious jab ran up to my neck, "Fuck!"

"Can't you give her a painkiller Gary?" Michael pressed down on my shoulder, stopping my instinctive jerk from the pain.

"She's burned through the dosage I gave her already. The local isn't working," the voice from the van, the one who had ordered me to be pinned down when I started fighting, stated coldly, "I have her arteries in decent shape. We really should take her to a hospital."

"No," my voice echoed with Integra's.

I yelped at another lance of agony, "Fucking cysts!"

Mel squeezed my hand, "Focus on me, baby."

"This is a clean slice at least Alex," Gary spoke, "Better than a broken bone."

"Considering I have both, I'm going to have a lot of...Ahhh!" I kicked out, trying not to move my upper body.

Tears fell from my eyes. Please body, just let me pass out again. I don't want to be conscious for this.

"Fuck. Drat. Cyst," I sobbed, wanting to break free of the restraints and the grips pinning me to the surface my back was on.

"How much longer?" Integra asked.

Gary grunted, "It gets done when its done. This is a lot of sewing I'm having to do and on someone who isn't under anesthetic. Michael, press down harder. She's moving too much."

Michael braced both his arms on my shoulder and across my chest, "Stop moving, Alex."

"If you want to switch positions, I would be more than happy to see you do better. Bastard!" I screamed jerking, squeezing my eyes shut, "Someone just knock me out. A club or gas."

"Almost done, Alex," Gary soothed, "Considering you could be a big pile of goo," I shrieked, drowning the last of his words.

Whatever he did hurt so much that black and grey spots danced across my eyelids, promising that I would be out soon.

Except I stayed awake for an eternity of time until the pain ebbed slowly to a nasty ache.

I panted, shaking uncontrollably.

"Done with this part."

Please, please. No more. I couldn't stand anymore punishment.

I whimpered at the new throbbing in my shoulder.

"Sonny is getting his due in Hell, baby," Mel said in a soft voice, "He's going to be suffering a long time for this."

Other voices promised the same.

In my mind he had gotten a better fate. Simply ceasing to exist. If I could believe in Heaven, then Hell wasn't a big step, yet I didn't. I had no comfort knowing my enemies were being flayed alive or tortured by a satanic figure with a pitchfork.

"Okay, I need to apply antibiotic cream and bandage her. Michael lift her, Mel keep hold of her other arm. I'm going to have to wrap around her chest to keep the bandages in place."

Oh cyst. I must be nude. Great. More men with images of my body in their minds. I didn't need this. Please, mind just let go and allow me to drift.

I was lifted. I kept my eyes closed trying not to go back to mindless sobbing.

"Applying. It should feel cold, but that means its working."

I shivered as icy slime was coated on my raw flesh a little past my shoulder joint. How much of a stump did I have. No, don't think on that. My stomach twisted at the thought. I wasn't going to throw up. I was going to sit here and just relax. Let them finish this. Then I could go hide.

"Chances of infection?" Integra asked.

"Minimal," Gary stated as he began wrapping the flesh, "Keep her there. I will move around you."

Cloth crossed my chest. I swallowed, feeling dizzy and sick. Was that a bad sign?

"Sick," I whispered, swallowing back the reflex to spew.

"Tilt her to the side," Gary ordered.

I was moved and it was too much.

When I was done, I felt worse. Shivers ran up and down my body and embarrassment chased them.

I didn't make a pretty sight right now.

"Good reflexes on the bucket Mel."

I peeked. Good. I hadn't made a mess on the floor. It looked like only a trashcan had gotten dirty.

"How are feeling Alex?"

I glared at Gary, noting he backed up, "Get it over with," I hissed.

He nodded hurriedly, then continued bandaging.

Michael offered sips of water to clear my mouth of the aftertaste. It was my only relief so far.

I worked up my bravery and looked at my shoulder.

The stump looked angry red and there were meticulous stitches all over the flesh. At least he was being methodical about this. Better chances that I avoided infection and complications now that it was gone.

Fear clenched at my heart but I hid it under a calm facade. At least some things I learned in the institution were still useful. I had some time before I broke down, but when it came I wanted to be somewhere private. No prying eyes. Lest of all the hard eyes of Sir Integra.

I didn't want to be any more weak than I was already. I had let a human force her hand. To save my life she had to decide to have my arm cut off. She shouldn't have to do that. I had to be strong enough to face my enemies. Even if I had to call for help.

I needed a new way to summon help to my side.

White covered the red quickly as its was wound around my chest and the stump.

Gary ended with two little metal pieces that held the ends to the cloth, securing it from shifting.

A hospital gown was draped over my torso and secured, "Done, Alex."

Gary stepped back, eyes warily on me.

I closed my eyes, trying to ignore the pain. Dratted painkillers. Where was my relief?

Then through the pain came the itch. It ran down my arm.

I reach to scratch and met with empty space.

I felt my jerk but tried to relax it the next second. The arm was gone. It was a ghost itch. My mind could keep on top of this. Don't react to anything that arm did.

"Soldiers," Integra ordered, "Take her to her room. Set her up comfortably."

"But the..." Gary started.

"The ward cannot be used. Cleaning up the goo proved it has done additional damage and contaminated the whole room. She will be better off in normal surroundings," Integra countered.

Gary agreed quickly to her command, "Okay. Guys, lay her back down on the stretcher. We'll take her down and set her up."

I was laid back down. My head added to my misery with a headache. Not a migraine but it was a close kin to it.

The stretcher lifted but I didn't care. I needed to nothing to happen now. I may not even be able to resume assisting in Hellsing's hunts. That disheartened me.

I wanted to help people. To protect them. To allow their decisions to change the world. Even stupid Vatican agents.

I was jostled but decided it was best to ignore them. Try to rest even though I felt the need to hurt someone or to beg to be knocked unconscious.

I heard doors being opened and the sudden halt.

"Alucard."

I opened my eyes, looked down to my feet.

He stood there looking every inch a king inspecting new subjects.

Or a few sickly ones.

"What are you waiting for. Our master has given her order."

I closed my eyes, "Please gentlemen. I need sleep."

They moved carefully, as if to avoid Alucard's ire. Or maybe mine.

For these too few moments, I was grateful not to be feeling emotions. I just wanted to be left alone.

"On three. One. Two," Gary called and I was moved with, "Three."

My stomach didn't rebel so I must be feeling better.

"Alex, I'll be back with a new IV drip. Due to your cast we'll have to use a central line."

"What does that mean?" I asked without opening my eyes.

"We'll have to put the IV line up your chest into your major artery."

I opened my eyes and looked at him, "I'm not sure I am comfortable with that."

Especially if it was necessary to do something, I didn't want to have the added danger of damaging my heart.

"You need the IV drip," Gary nodded to the other men and they all strode out.

The doors shut. I didn't want to look at Alucard.


	28. Tears and Comfort

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

* * *

I'm back hopefully for some good solid chapters. Reviews are very welcome!

* * *

The bed shifted as he sat down.

Without a thought I gazed up at his face, wondering what he was thinking of doing to me.

"How long was he in the room with you?"

That was an odd question.

"I don't know exactly, Alucard. Maybe ten minutes?" I resisted the urge to scratch at the arm that wasn't there anymore.

"He should have hurt you sooner."

"I distracted him by ranting. If he hadn't been a fanatic, I'd have won him over," my fingers touched cloth.

I jerked, looked.

My hand was hovering where my other arm should have been, fingers curled as if to scratch. For a moment I couldn't understand why my arm wasn't there.

I closed my eyes, "Cyst."

"Scratching will only serve to reopen the wound, Judas Girl," Alucard sounded like he was grinning, "Though I wouldn't mind you spilling some blood for my pleasure."

I scowled at him, eyes opened to narrow slits, "I've spilled enough, Alucard," a flash of Seras on her hands and knees, blood splayed around her form crossed my vision, "Is Seras okay?"

He blinked, "Why wouldn't she be?"

"Sonny shot her, and I know the members of Hellsing carry silver ammunition all the time. Not exactly vamp friendly."

"She will recover. She drank three blood packets before she fell asleep."

He seemed unconcerned over her well being now, but I couldn't forget how he rushed to her after executing Sonny. Leaving me alone.

I covered my eyes, feeling tears and fears threatening to flow out from under my facade, "I think its best if I get some rest."

Was I so weak to see his concern over Seras as a sign I'd be alone for the entirety of my life? Lovely, I was that weak. I was so lonely I craved this vamp's attention.

"You mean to cry alone."

I moved my hand aside, curious on how he was able to see so clearly to my core. Was I that transparent? Had I weakened that much, that my suffering was out on my sleeve as it were?

"It doesn't take much to know you keep your pain to yourself. You let go of the current physical pain, but are holding onto the emotional. To hide from those who would use your true face against you."

"You won't? Seems you like having all the cards when your opponent has no advantage nor ability you can top."

He took my fingers, moved my whole casted arm back to the other side of my body, away from the void-like space, "Interesting that you still managed to keep a few out of my sight."

A knock preceded Integra walking in, preventing me from asking what he meant.

"Alex, you are to be sleeping. Alucard, you are to come with me."

He stood, strode towards Integra, "Your orders, Sir Integra?"

"You will know soon enough," she glanced at me, "It seems your enemies have much to answer for. Will you lay idly by, Alex?"

"What do you mean?" What the drat did she think I could do with one arm missing and another in a plaster cast? Throw a rock at the mighty Vatican army? Punch Jacob? Yeah right.

She turned and walked out, "I will discuss this with you further."

Alucard was smirking as he turned to follow, stepping out into the hall.

I looked at my feet. What could I do? What hadn't I decided to do? If there wasn't such extremes in people, I would be just fine right now. Fanatics were like locusts. Devourers of nature.

"Oh, Judas Girl."

My eyes focused on Alucard's cheshire cat smile, "Alucard?"

"Don't take if off next time," he vanished out of sight, the door shutting out all light from the rest of the house. Only the dim room lights allowed me to see beyond my bed.

It was dark enough to go to sleep, if the pain didn't keep me up.

What had Alucard meant by don't take if off next time?

I rubbed my hand over my face. Wait, why was there metal on my hand.

I looked. Well, cyst. He'd done it again.

His ring glinted mutely, mimicking its master in its amusement. He had done it again. He had gotten pass my guard and slipped it on without me noticing.

I suppose he had to show me up every chance he had.

Except, I couldn't match him. Especially now.

Wetness soaked my cheeks and neck.

How could I be what I wanted to be, when I was so badly injured?

How could I gain love when I was less than most humans?

The first sob tore from my throat. Why? Why was I being made to suffer? What decisions had brought my downfall? What street had I missed which could have spared me this?

Where did my path lie now?

Where was my comfort? Where was my family, those I could asked to be hugged from? All I had was this cold room, an echoing emptiness.

* * *

Damp cloth wiped my forehead, waking me with a start.

I looked up in fear, wondering what new horror was visiting me.

Before I realized it was William.

He was frozen, watching me carefully.

"Miss Jones-Jordan."

"William," my voice was so soft I could barely hear it.

He smiled, "You are sweating profusely. I thought it prudent to...freshen up your forehead and neck."

"How long have I been asleep?"

"About twenty-three hours."

"I didn't think I could have slept with my arm," my shoulder throbbed viciously, making me clutch where my shoulder and neck met, "Drat."

"It will be several hours before you may have another pain-killer, Miss Jones-Jordan."

"Cysting Vatican," I hissed.

He nodded, "I quite agree. If you feel up for it, perhaps a meal will settle your nerves and attitude."

"I can try a bit and see if I can keep it down," I wasn't so sure I was recovered enough to stomach food. The memory while they had been sewing my arm rose. I needed the food so I had to eat.

"I will bring in the tray."

I was feeling better since I had my crying jag, yet the core of loneliness was irritating me. It was still inside me. A rock that hadn't been worn down with finding people who truly listened to me. Some even didn't care I was a Humanist. Or thought it could be used to benefit others.

Except not having the comfort of a person was chilling me. Chipping pieces of my humanity away.

I missed my parents. When I came to them, they knew when I needed encouragement or teasing. My whole family had been destroyed by one of humankind's enemies. One my grandfather fought.

Why hadn't he saved us? Why had he allowed the monsters to take them from me? His words meant nothing now as his actions spoke far louder. He'd abandoned us.

The smell of food drew my gaze and hopeful thoughts.

William stopped the cart beside my bed, "I believe you will be more comfortable sitting up, so I brought a leaning pillow."

"Leaning pillow?"

He pulled a triangle shaped from the bottom of the cart, "We'll need to get you sitting."

I didn't wait for him to help me. I used my elbows to...I tilted to the side before I remembered I was missing an arm. I paused, adjusted before I let my tears best me. I got mostly sitting before William gently helped me stay steady as he placed the pillow. When he was done I leaned back.

It was comfortable as William had promised.

"Thank you, William."

"My pleasure, Miss Jones-Jordan," he set a lap desk over my lap, then the tray, "Today is a rich turkey stew with seasonal vegetables. Fresh squeezed orange juice and garlic-seasoned rye bread."

"Turkey?" That sounded really good.

He took off the lid and the burst of scent made my stomach growl.

"It is high in calories and protein, Miss Jones-Jordan. I'll be back with Gary to redo your bandages."

"So soon?"

"We must check for infection or other complications for the next several days. Was there anything else I can bring when I return?"

"A DVD or something that can be played on the computer? If I have to lay here and recover I want something to do."

"I will explore what we have. I'll see if we can bring down some books as well."

"That would be perfect," this will help keep me calm and allow me to think.

I reached out and took up the spoon, dipped it in the stew.

The first taste was wonderful. My stomach settled immediately.

"This is good. Thank you William."

"I am glad," he bowed, "Until later, Miss Jones-Jordan."

He left, silently closing the door.

I smiled, already feeling better. I polished off the stew and the rest of the meal.

I looked at my stump. I was upset but trying to think of what to do. There were prosthetics I could get fitted for that could give me back some of my abilities. Unfortunately they weren't very close to recovering an arm, and most likely wouldn't stand up to a vamp attack.

Where were the cool doctors like in the cyborg movies? Ghost in the Shell. Robocop. Hmm. Could I crush a vamp's throat if I had the arm of the Mortal Combat guy?

It would certainly kill Marvin. If my dream was right, he had ordered this. I'll hurt him.

How though? He had power, men, money. I decided my fate, not some pompous dick with a severe religious nutcase syndrome.

I closed my eyes trying to think of a way to hurt someone like that.

My nose was filled with the scent of pine. That was wrong. Very wrong.

I opened my eyes to a forest. Pines, short stumpy bushes, a darting creature ran under a downed tree. Not quite like the one above my hometown, but really close.

Except the desk, my bed and Alucard's coffin were still in the scene.

I shook my head, "This isn't normal."

Seras opened the door, "Alex, did you see a little image...oh."

"What is this?" I indicated the room.

"Alucard can create illusions. I was trying to create a small scene on my wall but..."

"You couldn't control it," inside, I breathed a sigh of relief.

I wasn't going nutso or had the dreaded nervous breakdown. Seras has simply screwed up one of her powers.

The forest faded away slowly.

"Interesting ability. Is this power to disguise an attack?" I asked.

Seras flushed, "Umm, no."

"Then what is the point?"

"To dazzle and confused our victims," she looked very uncomfortable.

"To keep a human from running from the vamp? Clever," curious that Alucard hadn't used it on me.

"He says that the best way is to create a world that they will accept unconditionally."

"That makes sense," I smiled at her, "Not all humans are as accepting of vamps. It's a seduction of the mind, then?"

"Not the way he showed me," Seras sat on the edge of my bed, "He did it to frighten me."

An image of the institution flashed through my head. If Alucard knew to use that I might be too stupid to reject the image when I should, "He uses it to keep his prey too scared to fight him?"

"He did on me," she scowled gloomily, crossing her arms under her breasts.

"He does that a lot with both of us. He enjoys scaring us, or playing pranks and tricks."

"I wish he didn't. I feel as if he's judging me unfit to be a good vampire."

"In that cases I'm worse than you. I'm not even a vamp."

She laughed, her eyes brightening, "I shouldn't be laughing but that cheers me."

"At least you look recovered from Sonny's attack."

She opened her mouth, looked ay my stump, then away hurriedly, "You have more color now."

"Its going to take a long time to get use to not having my arm, Seras. Don't feel bad."

"I should have acted quicker. If I had avoided the shot or used my shadows you wouldn't have lost the arm," her tone was so sad and self-recriminating I knew she thought it was her fault.

"I should have asked for a guard to be left, Seras. I assumed he was gone when I couldn't read his emotions. I knew better as he hid behind a mask."

"But I."

"Seras, I felt you coming down the hall. You noticed the door was shut. You knew something bad was going on. If you hadn't caught the hints, he would have injected me with the...I guess goo-juice," she looked at me curiously, "then I would be only a puddle of liquid. No one would have known what had happened to me. I would have simple ceased to exist. Your quick observation only ended with me losing an arm."

She touched her own shoulder, "If you were a vampire it wouldn't matter."

"Why, Seras?"

"I recovered my arm after an enemy cut me up."

"So you are gaining Alucard's ability to regenerate any wound," if someone did manage to bite me and turn me into a vamp, would I be able to bring back my arm or would the wound be permanent?

"I didn't think I'd be up and walking so quickly after being shot with silver."

"Really?"

"He clipped my heart with his first bullet. I thought I was dead when he lined up the head-shot," she looked at me, tears in her eyes, "I thought that if I died at least I had saved you. Then he dropped the gun. I hadn't seen you leap from the bed to attack him," a red-tinged tear fell before she hugged me.

No matter the lack of comfort last night, this made up for it. I hugged her back as best I could with my casted arm, "You saved me, Seras. I knew he was going for a head shot and I couldn't let him do that. I forgot my ankles and acted. Right now, I'm grateful I survived the fanatic's attack."

"Why did you use that wording, Alex?" Sir Integra's voice echoed in the room.


	29. Rebuilding the Fortress and Resistance

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

* * *

I'm back hopefully for some good solid chapters. Reviews are very welcome!

* * *

I looked over Sera's shoulder when she froze.

Drat. I guess I had to take the comfort I could while I could. At least I had a friend who I could talk to without the threat of vampism on my head. Though cyst it, I wanted a few more minutes. Reminder to self, find a way to lock door.

"Sir Integra?" I dropped my arm from Seras so she could stand and be at parade rest.

"You said fanatic. Was Sonny more than jealous?" She seemed genuinely interested.

She hadn't found out who Sonny was? Or was I wrong? Had I told her or had I just simply passed out?

"He attacked to protect me from Alucard's devilish ways," I rolled my eyes as Seras tensed, "Seems he was to administer a 'gift' to help me stay safe. I guess the safest I'd be is dead."

"Vatican?"

"That is what it appears to be. I think their tests are a bit heavy-handed. Dead or survive only through intervention. Stupid cysts. No wonder I'm the only regenerator descendent left. If they did this to others their survival obviously wasn't top priority."

"So this was their test?"

"If my dream was correct, yes. Apparently Marvin the Martian decided not to get the proper authorizations for it, nor the procedure."

Integra smiled, "The Martian?"

I flushed, covering my face, "Drat. I didn't mean to say that name out loud."

"So you had a second dream. Did they say what is the correct method for this test?"

I dropped my hand, looking my lap for a few seconds before I remembered I had only one arm and only one hand would be laying there.

I inhaled, blew out a breath, "Not through an IV is all I got from them. So I'm guessing that stabbing me with the needle was too close to the IV so that's why my arm dissolved as if in acid or maybe a base solution."

"The second authorizer would have declined?"

"She said my abilities would not benefit for the risk involved. She said that I'm healing faster than a human, but not even close to Anderson's level. She did indicate that I'd be ideal for breeding," my face scrunched up, "which is not exactly what I plan on doing. Especially with these scum after me."

"Anything else?"

Anderson's words came back to me, "Anderson is on his way."

She nodded, "To protect you from further harm, no doubt. So our Vatican friends are fighting amongst themselves. Curious that Marvin," she smirked, "the Martian didn't wait for the lady to allow the test. What does he know that we don't?"

"If I'm only seeing through Anderson's eyes, I doubt I'll be able to find out."

"So if you hadn't had you arm amputated, you would be dead. I wonder what reasoning Marvin had for such a risk. Then to destroy his spy in our midst," she took out a cigar and chewed on the end, "That is a terrible tactical move especially as he was undetected and would have continued to be so. There are many reasons for Sonny's emotions including simple insanity."

"Sonny said something about the monsters getting his codes. Maybe it was two birds with one stone."

"Really?" Integra nodded, "Some more avenues to investigate. What was the name of the lady who had to approve the test?"

"Anderson called her Sister Kate. The way she talked and the screens on her computer were all on genetics or science. Umm. She has a family. Children."

"That will limit the field. Sisters don't generally have children," Integra stepped out the door, "Good work, Alex."

"I wish I could do more, Sir Integra."

"Considering my soldiers have to take six months or more to return to duty and provide results, you are ahead of the curve. Seras, keep Alex company until Alucard returns."

"Sir Integra?" Seras looked as confused as I felt.

"Her enemies have to go through a vampire to get to her. Perhaps you or Alucard will be able to gain what their plan is on their next attempt, Seras."

A next attempt? Drat. Cyst. I hadn't thought of that.

It made sense. I was the target. Keep me out of sight and in a secure place. One that they have to breach to get at me. Sigh, bore city here I come. I was so hoping to wear one of those new kilts out and about.

"Sir Integra?" A thought came to me to ask.

"Alex?"

"How long is it before a soldier is back on duty with a missing arm?"

"Those who lose their arms didn't survive long enough to give us a recovery time," with that cheerful note she left us.

Seras looked at me, "So what do we do?"

"How good are you with computers and the internet, Seras?" Time to expand Seras' world.

Just because she was a vamp didn't mean she couldn't know the world outside.

Maybe, just maybe, we could share our expertise. I could show her the options to have friends and if...no...when I became a vamp either by choice or in the unlikely chance I was bitten by force, I'd have one who'd teach me gently in comparison to the harsh lessons Alucard would no doubt punish me with.

He wouldn't tolerate anything but the best in his draculina.

Yet, would he want me when it came that day? Would I still be as I am now, only more? Was it better to say yes now, and lose my resistance to him? Was I so weak to let him win this?

No. I wouldn't just give in on this without reason. I was human and I'd cling to it as long as I could. Even if my powers are monstrous and I doubted myself, I would value humanity as long as I was able. To my last breath if my will held out.


	30. Edge of Dreams

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

* * *

I'm back hopefully for some good solid chapters. Reviews are very welcome!

* * *

We managed to find the uTube list for Dominion Tank Police, which I figured Seras would enjoy. We full-screened it on my computer and rotated it so we could watch it from my bed, and my desk chair that Seras brought over to my side.

Not the biggest screen but I could read most text on it.

"Do they really use tanks?" she asked as the first video streamed.

I grinned, "Why don't you watch and see?"

She looked at me, "You sound like a nicer version of master."

"I doubt you want to have him hear that. I sure don't," please, I didn't need him doing something to prove I wasn't him. I dratted knew I wasn't. No healing ability and no vampism to save my butt.

She shivered, "No, I don't want him to deal out retribution for my words."

Then she started laughing at the mayor of the city and the police commander's conversation, "Tank incidents five percent of all traffic incidents?"

"It's going to get better."

She was laughing at the end of the viewing, "So this is from your America?"

"Nope. That is Japanese Anime. Search for the full movie stream. I think you'll enjoy Die Hard."

I ended up falling asleep in the middle, shortly after the ho ho ho dead guy was delivered to the bad guys. The throbbing in my arm woke me to the ending music of the third Die Hard movie. Seras must have liked them to keep watching. I'd have to show her Sledge Hammer. Good for some laughs.

I blinked, wondering when I ended up on my side, the stump pointed to the ceiling.

At least I had a few hours of sleep even if I missed the movies and Seras' first viewing of an American cop action thriller.

I looked up, into Seras' spiky hair. She was asleep too, head pillowed on her arms. Bad guard.

She was in the same position as me. Wounded and recovering, so I guess I could give her a pass for tonight.

I knew someone else had returned since I had passed out.

"Coffin a mite boring, Alucard?" my words were slurred as I looked over my shoulder at the warmth at my back.

He smirked, his length stretched out so that his feet overhung the end of my bed, "I'd rather be near my girls."

I rolled my eyes, yawned, then faced forward, "Of course. Rare to have us both in the same spot at the same time."

His arm wrapped my waist, startling me as I wondered why I hadn't felt anything over my non-casted arm or under it.

Oh lovely. Cyst it. Missing arm.

"Stupid Vatican. Dratted tests."

He chuckled, nuzzling my neck, "At least they saved your virgin throat for me."

"You'll wait."

"Oh?"

"You rather," I yawned again, "have me say yes so that way I'm the only one to blame for how I turn out as a vamp. My decision, my consequences."

"And if I just bit you?" his teeth scraped my skin, making me shiver.

"A part of you would always wonder what I'd have decided," I burrowed into my pillow, "Would I choose the path of the vamp, or would I die, human?"

"Is that so?"

"Yes. You prefer we decided, to choose the path of inhumanity. To be a vamp, beyond the rules of humanity or to lay down and die as prey to you and your kin. That's why you have Seras for so long. She chose to be a vamp, even a weak one."

My eyes closed and I was beginning to drift.

"And you? What would you choose?"

I frowned, "Not sure. Don't want Jacob to bite me. He's too unstable. He'd kill me before I had a chance to see what I could do."

"Am I unstable?"

"Seem unstable, but you are...consistent in your goals. Not easily distracted."

"Oh?"

"You wouldn't have fallen for the southern accent, gotten mad. You make your opponents mad. To drive them unto your sword before they realized they were dead. You want to fight me, but you restrain yourself. I'm too injured to give as good as I get."

"If you had to choose to become a vamp, who would you bare your neck for? Jacob, an unknown vampire or me?"

I was dropping down through consciousness, "Ideal, no other factors, you."

He was silent so long that I thought I had imagined saying those words out loud.

His tongue swiped over my pulse, "Good."

Drat. He could bite me right now with that agreement.

I was out before I could struggle up to tell him no. Not now.

Cyst.


	31. Actions and Old Games

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

'========----========'

This chapter was fully written on an iPad. I'm hoping with this change in style will allow me to write more and get updates posted sooner. Reviews are very welcome!

'========----========'

I woke to William's voice.

"Today's blood is AB negative. Please let me know if you want another, Mister Alucard."

"Nothing for me. Judas girl may need her meal now."

I blinked my eyes open, relieved that I hadn't been bitten. Alucard probably heard my words last night and was thinking on what he could reply with.

"Did I hear something about food?" oh drat, was that my voice? It sounded dry and raspy.

"Indeed, Miss Jones-Jordan. I brought a stew with rye bread. Fresh apple juice with your anti-inflammatory pills," he came over with a tray.

Suspicion tightened my stomach. If my pills had been contaminated what was to say these hadn't been? I couldn't treat everything with suspicion or I'd never be able to live with other people.

Gary came in, "I found the vitamin supplements, William."

"Ah, perfect timing," William set the tray across my lap, "I was about to serve her lunch."

Lunch? How long had I been out?

"Alex, I brought you a book," Gary set down a thick volume, "Ancient Babylon mythology. Based on your belief...ideology," he held up his hands when I shot him a look, "I thought you might like to read it."

I opened the cover looked at the first page, "Thanks, Gary. It will give me something else to do."

"The physical guys said to give you something to do besides wallow. I think Sir Integra is thinking of giving you paperwork to deal with."

"Paperwork? That might be interesting for an hour," I sighed, "Difficult for one arm."

I scowled at my stump. How could I be me when I was missing such a vital part of myself? If I had one less part of my humanity, how far had I descended into being a monster?

Not like Alucard. I probably would never be at ease with slaughter as he was, even after I became a vamp. My heart wasn't in causing pain. One of the downsides to having empathy is that you felt the pain of those around you if you didn't guard yourself.

"You'll be up and at them in no time, Miss Jones-Jordan," William smiled, "I'm certain that such a wound will not keep you down for long."

If only I had the solidarity and strength he seemed to think I had. Inside I was cowering back from the direction my path was leading me, except for one outcome. Alucard.

"We'll see William. It will be a long road of recovery. Both a broken arm and a missing one is a bit more than an average human deal with at one time, save maybe after a severe car accident."

"Better than most who go up against vampires or ghouls," Gary said sadly, "You die quick or die slow."

His emotions were deeply engraved with grief. He had lost someone. To vamps? To a ghoul?

"When you put it that way, I'm grateful to be alive. Especially as I don't get an afterlife for deeds good, bad or indifferent."

"I didn't think you'd go for westerns," Gary smiled, "Though that isn't the best one out there."

"Oh? What is the best one out there?"

"High Noon."

"Ah. Did you every read the story?"

"There's a story?"

"American literature class. We had to read the story first. If one person watched the movie before reading it, no one would get to watch the fun movie of Star Wars."

Those days seemed so...innocent now. As if just by being, existing I was stripping away the brightness in my life, either though the actions of others or because I was too stupid and ignorant to run.

"I have left behind my childish voice, gaining the actions of an adult."

"That was in High Noon?"

I flushed, "No. It's a paraphrase of a philosophy. We speak when we are too afraid to act, as those actions are expressions of ourselves. Those who see the actions we take see deeper into our firm personalities and flying hopes than through simple conversation."

"So, you are strong, resilient and hardheaded?" Gary chuckled, "and one of my better patients. I swear when Sonny busted his knee," he went silent for a long moment, "That was heartless of me. I'll let you be, Alex."

"Gary," I called after him before he was out the door, "Actions can be words as well. That is why we have diplomats who make compromises for the betterment of the world."

He nodded, "I prefer words of healing and hope, than ugly memories."

William took away the empty plates, bowing as he left, closing the door.

"By your original philosophy, I'm a child?"

I flinched. I couldn't help it. Alucard did not sound very amused.

I turned, then reared back, "Cyst it, Alucard."

Note to self, get taller bed so I wasn't face to groin with Alucard standing. Though in another context...drat it. Bad hormones.

I felt the flush across my cheeks, "You are doing this on purpose," I growled.

He chuckled, "You didn't seem to mind my closeness last night, Judas Girl."

"True...what am I saying? Grrr," I covered my eyes, laid back, "You are too much for me. Have fun elsewhere."

"Ah, that is interesting. What were you going to say?"

That annoying and patronizing tone grated on me, but not enough to reveal that I had been thinking I had enjoyed him holding me.

I squeaked as I was bounced up, flinging my arms out to catch myself. Only one arm caught the bedspread and held. Where was my other arm?

"Oh, cyst," I exhaled, "Arm missing. Try to remember that."

"You aren't freaking out, Judas Girl. That is firmer than many of the men who have served our master. They broke down and cried like helpless babies as ghouls bore down on them."

"I doubt I could avoid crying as I am helpless on the same level as a baby," I leaned away as he took up my whole field of vision, "you're too close."

"I will bite if you do nothing. What will you do, Alex Jones-Jordan?" he stretched out my name into single syllables.

There was nothing I could do to fight him. Well as the saying goes: If you can't beat them...

I grabbed his nape pulled him into a kiss.

I think I surprised him as he didn't react for a full second, just keeping his expressionless eyes on mine. He closed his eyes and tilted his head to deepen the kiss. Well, here's hoping he took this as a hint to leave me alone.

I slid my hand to his cheek, my thumb next to left eye. His teeth cut my lips as he growled, his emotions spiking with bloodlust.

If I did this to a human they'd be permanently damaged. He wasn't.

My thumb sank into his eye, making him jerk back. My thumb was coated in his blood, some trailing down to my wrist as it was freed of his eye socket.

His uninjured eye considered me before he laughed.

"Very good, Judas Girl. You still have your fighting spirit," his eye reformed until twin orbs of crimson stared at me.

His hand seized my wrist. I tried to pull back, but he had the leverage. My hand was in front of his mouth. Please don't bite.

His tongue slithered from between his shark teeth, circling my wrist. His eyes closed and the bloodlust eased.

My heart was pounding as he lapped up his blood from my skin, moving up to my thumb, with thorough attention to every inch of skin. This was a vamp's favorite treat. Blood.

His eyes slitted open, locked on my face. He smirked.

"You need practice, Judas Girl."

"Practice on what?" I could hardly think beyond two possibilities.

He was about to bite me as he had promised, or do something else that I would be unable to resist. Maybe to even say yes if he pressed me on joining him as his draculina.

"Other defenses. Not every vampire will be interested in your lips," his mouth covered my thumb and sucked.

I felt like I was beat red, when Integra's voice breached this way too intimate moment.

"Alucard, whatever you are doing will not help Alex heal faster."

He released my thumb with a small pop, smirking at me, before standing and striding leisurely towards his throne.

Whatever made Integra come done here I was grateful for.

She had a half of a cigar left, burning gloomily. She lifted something so it was now visible.

"Anderson's bayonet?" I frowned confused as to why she had it.

"My first shift of guards on the front door report this suddenly slamming into the wood with this ribbon."

A pale green with silver edges. Oh, cyst he remember that silly old game?

"You know what this means?" she considered me harshly.

"When I came back after the fire, my parents hardly paid me any mind for the first couple months. It was too painful to know that they had lost their eldest and I was their eldest then. They often had arguments over me and the cost of raising someone who had such obvious mental problems. If Anderson got there before I did he'd leave a pin with a ribbon very much like that one to have me go find a hiding spot. He'd come find me when the argument had passed. If I didn't want to go hide due to being sick or had homework, I had to take the pin and put it on the top of the fence of our backyard. I remember he teased me when I was too short to reach the top of the fence and settled for pinning it to the inside of a hole in the fence so he could see it."

She rubbed the ribbon, "So this is a declaration of him coming and finding you?"

I rubbed my head with both...with one hand, then sighed, "I think he fears I am dead so this is his way of asking if I am alive but hurt."

"You aren't putting this out, and showing this on the outer fence is unsightly."

I felt the smile curling my lips, "May I suggest, Sir Integra, that you have it planted in the gun range wall?"

"Your reasoning for that?"

"Its out of sight of outside viewers. If Anderson's assertion that he can see great distance is true, he won't have to come unto the property to see it and it can only be seen from a few select angles by snipers, so he'll be forced to one of those spots to look. You'll see him long before he sees you. Lastly, he won't charge in to find my body to have it buried in blessed ground against my wishes."

She nodded, "Sounds reasonable. Will he still try to find you?"

"Not back then. Though then the worse injury I had was seared lungs."

"So he could still rush our soldiers. I'll have Mel and Michael set this out," she leveled a hard glare on Alucard where he sat on his throne, "Let her recover. I don't need another draculina."

He merely grinned as the homicidal lunatic he was.

Integra left, exhaling smoke in an angry huff.


	32. Paged to Drugs

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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This chapter was fully written on an iPad, with some edits on the computer. I'm hoping with this change in style will allow me to write more and get updates posted sooner. Reviews are very welcome!

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I read the book Gary left, propping it on my knees, carefully turning pages with my off hand. Often, I'd reach to turn the page with my right hand, to stop and reaffirm that it was gone. So many little things that we did on a daily basis and took for granted.

Alucard leaned in his throne, seemingly asleep, but his emotions gave him away. He was doing serious thinking. Brooding almost. At least he wasn't in my hair and delaying my recovery. Though knowing him, this could be a bad thing for me later. He'd think of so many ways to pay me back for the eye.

You know the saying "An eye for an eye makes the world blind?" I had this bad feeling Alucard was a firm believer in the first part of that phrase. Which meant I might have gotten on his bad side. Of course one had to wonder if Alucard had a good side. I think he only had neutral and bad sides. Me, I had good, apathetic and mean sides. I just didn't indulge myself with the mean side.

A kind word can go a long way. At least I had the two by four as a backup option in case of someone being stupid. Well, a person afraid of taking a hit from a two by four, anyway.

"You never did answer me, Judas Girl."

"I haven't answered a lot of your questions, Alucard. By the way, must you call me Judas Girl?" I looked over at him, carefully holding my hand on the book so I kept it on my lap, "I know you are mocking me with the girl and inexperience, but Judas?"

"You will be Judas Girl. Nothing can change that."

I considered him for a long moment. Shrugged, going back to my book. He had a right to call me anything he wanted. Just like I had the right to do the same to him. Hmmm. What could I call him in return? Bossiness? Nah, he'd like that one. Babycakes. I'd get skewered for sure on that one. Sharkman? That would encourage him using his "shark-teeth" all the time.

"Judas Girl," his voice was grating, "you are a coward."

I turned and smiled nastily as it came to me, "And you are too easily bored, Fang Boy."

He looked so offended that I laughed, "What? Only you are allowed to call others names? Or is it no one was willing to taunt the lion with the first insult? To rile you to action and incensed fury?"

He stood and would have done something I think I'd regret but the door suddenly exploded into splinters.

I froze, unable to do anything as blades struck Alucard, sending him into the far wall, pinned by holy scripture.

"Anderson?" I turned to the door, afraid.

Pages circled me, cutting off my view of everything including Alucard. I frantically tried to knock aside the twirling gold edged pages but I felt myself being lifted.

I lashed out with my hand toward the mass of pages that had to be Anderson, but my hand simply merged with his pages. We were suddenly flying.

I tried to scream, but I was being paged. Paper has no voice to convey a shriek. The ground tumbled around me, messing up my orientation and vision. My stomach rebelled.

Just in time to spew all over the front of Anderson's pure white coat and shirt. He made a face but held me still as I finished. The world righted after I wiped my mouth on my shirt.

"Cysting asshole!" I snapped the instant I had my breath back, "Do you really think that paging a wounded person is the best fucking method!"

Laughter drew my gaze to Hienkel.

He went silent and braced.

"I may not be feeling well right now, but that doesn't mean I will forget this affront."

"Stop talking as that heathen witch," Anderson growled, "Her manners donna fit ye, Alex."

"And being a passive, shriveled old crone inside is? You are making me into a fucking coward!"

Drat, I was using Alucard's terminology now. I was a coward, copying him in a fight. I just didn't have the power to back up my words.

"Donna feign that ye are that heathen's friend. She sacrificed her own butler on the altar of this Protestant country."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" I felt Seras' spike of emotion, followed by the dull roar of fury that was Alucard,"How can I believe you when you are trying to convert me on the sacrificial altar of your god?"

"Diz would be a good time to gag her. She draw the enemy to our location before we get her on de helicopter."

"What! You are not taking me anywhere. Let go of me," I jerked against Anderson's restraining arms.

Anderson swung me into his arms and began striding away from the emotion signatures of the two vamps.

"I am not your family Anderson. You might as well leave me where I can recover in peace."

"Na in that monster's room. Are ye daft? He isna a human ta leave ye be in rest," Anderson's chiding tone grew harsher as he spoke, "What do ye think he would have done ta ye if ah hadna intervened for yer sake, Alex?"

"Probably threatened me like he has for the last several weeks. If he had tried something I would have made him pause."

"Like meh? Ye have na done anything ta stop meh from taking ye ta Iscariot."

Fear poured through me, "You are taking me to Marvin the fucking Martian?"

The trees around us began to rustle and rocks floated from the ground. The pounding in my head matched the rhythm on my heart.

Anderson's eyes widened, "Donna..."

I jumped from his arms, landed on my feet, wavering slightly as both ankles flashed pain up my legs, "That monster nearly killed me with your fucking test! And you will put me in his grasp, a muzzled pup unable to fight the pit bulls who will tear her to pieces! Fie unto ye who casts stones when ye house is but glass!"

Branches snapped off, whirled around me, the stones flashing by as comets. Anderson backed up, looking pained yet determined. He drew his bayonets, braced.

"Ye will come back ta the Vatican with meh, Alex. Willing or na."

Seras, please come. Feel my fear and come! I didn't think I could hold against them for long. I needed backup stat!

"I am but the voice of reason to your insanity. You destroy dissenters who are better than you. I will not fall to you."

I lashed out with a mental wall, knocking Heinkel sideways from his leap at me, into the bushes far behind me. I heard him roll, swear. My eyes stayed on Anderson, even as my body trembled, the aura teasing the edge of my eyes.

"Alex, donna make meh hurt ye."

"You do that fine on your own! Where were you when Jeremy was turned? Where were you when Kevin was eaten? Where were you when they raped and tortured my parents? Nowhere, you fucking hypocrite. You are the sound of wind that brings no relief to the backs of the ill. You are the ocean to a thirsting man! Thou shalt not suffer a poisoner to live! That is the true words of your bible, Anderson. You have punished the good, protected the wicked, ignored all worthy allies for filth. You are a disease upon this world."

I turned, roundhouse Hienkel, ducking Anderson's strike with the butt of his blade.

Seras, Alucard, Integra! Someone help me!

A gunshot rang out, breaking Anderson's glasses from the bridge of his nose, making him stumble back.

"We will allow you to leave in the good graces of her majesty, Vatican," a new feminine voice spoke harshly, "We have yet to forget your role in the destruction of our home country."

I kept my eyes and senses on Anderson and Heinkel.

Which was why when the pain hit my shoulder I was unprepared. I grabbed the thing that was sticking out of my shoulder. A yellow striped dart. My vision wavered as I looked at the new comer.

"Sister Kate?" I sank to my knees, "Tricky...cyst."

"How does she know ye, Sister Kate?" Anderson growled.

"This is our first meeting. Odd," she frowned, "I told you to be gentle with her, Father Anderson. We do not know the extent of her injuries. You were fortunate I had been a spy once among the Queen's court and could call upon that training once more. Now gently pick her up. Don't jostle her."

I was lifted, dizzy already, quickly sinking under whatever drugs she had given me.

"I'm sorry, Integra," my vision went black, "Not...strong...enough."


	33. Telepath and Killer

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the reviews: Kaida Ukitake and x Evelina x. Please remember to breathe. I take a while to make sure the chapters are good, but hopefully not another month between.

;-)

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Disinfectant and other cold scents of a hospital, woke me.

Was I back in an institution? Was Alucard nothing more than a pleasant dream my mind had cooked up to pass the time until I was released once more into the world?

I cracked my eyes, scanned the room.

White, white and more white. It was like being in a blizzard. Very uninspired decor. On each of the walls I could see was a cross. Not the fancy ornate ones with Jesus looking so sad and tortured with blood running down his sides. Instead is was just a simple rich brown wood-grain with words written in the center.

God. Jesus. Holy Ghost.

I heard the pattering of little feet, drawing my slitted gaze to the door. Three children raced by the open arch. Based on the colors, it was two boys in blue and a girl in pink. They giggled as they ran, their voices soft.

My eyes swept the room, sliding over two battered but clean tables with white flowers. A single dresser, probably for my clothes, if any managed to survive the checking process of the guards. Though with children about it was looking less likely that this was an institution for the mentally ill. This had to be a normal hospital.

So that meant Anderson had brought me here without my permission. The cysting git!

As I wasn't up to the task of fighting him, I'd have to wait. That or sic Alucard on him. That would be very amusing to watch from a very safe distance. He deserved far worse than Alucard's undivided attention. Oh drat. Then I wouldn't be having Alucard paying attention to me. That would be lonely.

I already hated this place. Doctor Fentonfield's hospital had more class. None of this overdone and obvious religious decor. Sigh. Was I in Rome? If I was, it would be harder for Integra to get me out. I had to get myself back to Hellsing. Which was going to take time. I had to have full use of my powers and as healed as I could get to effectively escape from Anderson, Heinkel, Sister Kate and anyone else they had in the wings.

Minutes went by, crawling. No one came to see me. Did they think I was still out? Had the drugs burned out of my system earlier than expected? Or had I been out longer than I thought, and they assumed I had to rest through a bad chemical reaction between my pain meds, anti-inflammatory pills and the tranq?

The light faded through the doorway, turning rosy. Dusk or an artificial creation mimicking it. I closed my eyes, let my body doze, my mind working. True sleep eluded me, as emotions spiked and ebbed for what felt like several hours. Most of the spikes were children. Ranging in ages from five to seventeen. I think the nuns weren't watching as closely as they should be as a few of the teens were engaging in sex. I hated intruding on them, but I needed for-warning of anyone who came near me. I could only rely on myself for protection. There was no Seras watching over me as a dark real angel, nor Alucard as the sadistic devil. Not even the mortal people who shaped this world such as Integra, Mel, Michael, and William. I was alone.

Cyst. I hated being cut off from people. Not even my game to connect me to Deri or Tenir. Even the annoying pest Curdles who spammed the open chat with "Ur mom waz down on me. She sux balls."

This room was too open to attack. Why did they put me here? Was I not precious to them anymore? Did the test suddenly make me an invalid?

I opened my eyes and moved my toes. Check, both feet there and working. I raised my arms...oh drat. One arm in a new cast. Missing arm wrapped in new bandages. At least Gary couldn't complain on that.

Could I walk out? Was Marvin and his goons waiting to force me back into bed? Waiting for the first sign of rebellion to crush it and my will to fight them?

I didn't want to be killed for their delusions of grandeur, nor to be forced into submission either.

Anderson turned the corner, his emotions spiking with relief, "Are ye in pain, Alex?"

My eyes narrowed on him, "I'm pissed off. What gave you the right to kidnap me from my home?"

"Ye are safer here," he moved around the bed to pull out the visitor chair.

"Where you righteous men of god will poison me with that drug to test me? To kill me? I have no soul to save. I will simply cease to exist, Father Anderson."

His cheek ticked, his jaw clenching before he relaxed it with visible effort, "Alex, ye are a good soul. God wouldna abandon ye to fire and brimstone. He'd spare ye such a fate."

"There is no fate. Only the collection of decisions this entire world of humans make on a daily basis is the force behind the outcomes. The consolidation of all decisions each and every being makes since the first one of us rose from the ocean on fin-feet. What decisions we make in this life is all we get before death steals our voices forevermore."

Anderson sighed, sat down, "Ye are a good woman. Yer disbelief isna but an illusion ta shelter yer mind from the evil ye have been forced ta face."

"I'm a nonbeliever. I don't think there is a god, goddess nor animal deity waiting to guide me to some overblown outdated heaven. No heaven awaits me for my deeds good, bad and despicable."

He closed his eyes, took off his glasses. New glasses? Unless he had a large supply he must have taken the time to get a new pair made.

He rubbed his nose, sighing, "Ye are na convincing meh ye are a heathen. No heathen would protect so many ta the death as did Joan."

"Joan was a glory hound, not a saint. Do not compare me to that selfish individual."

He put his glasses back on, considered me, "Ye need ta bank yer fire lest yer consume all that ye are and be nothing but ashes."

"The water dumped on me will extinguish my light unless I burn brightly."

He closed his eyes, "Ah'll argue with you later, Alex."

Then the cysting jerk dropped into sleep.

"You are an asshole," I scowled at him, "I detest being here."

"Did you just call Father Anderson an asshole?"

Drat it, I wasn't paying attention. I turned to the speaker. A teenager leaned against the jam insolently, an innocent smile on his boyish face. I really missed Alucard's smirks. Of course, I would never tell him that.

This teen was nearly six feet already. Back home he'd be on the basketball team, getting all the hot chicks for only his athletic abilities. His blonde hair was streaked with blue, giving him a punk look that was at odds with his demeanor. This one wasn't a punk, out to rebel against the world. He'd support the corrupt policies with no thought. A typical stupid blonde. Thank whatever collective decisions allowed Seras to have a decent amount of intelligence and common sense. She actually had a brain under the spiky blonde hair, and behind those big blue eyes.

I answered him, "Yeah, I did."

"You have to forgive him. If he thinks here is a better place for you to be, he will stay until you decide not to leave."

Lovely. I had a watch dog.

"Then he will be waiting a very long time. I don't feel comfortable in a location I was force to, away from my family."

"What family? Archbishop Marvin said you had no family."

My glare made him back up, "That sack of cyst pus is why I'm missing my arm. Don't trust him."

"Jesus, lady. I have to take him at his word."

"People in authority are not always those who should have that position."

He rubbed his head, "That I know personally. So do you want me to check in with your family to make sure they are alright."

I had a way to get a message out, except, "I can tell when you are asleep or not, Anderson."

"Donna offer that ta her. Her...family isna ones we want knocking on the door of this hospital."

"Hmm, like you attacking them and kidnapping me? I only thought you Iscariot do that," I retorted.

"You really need to take a moment miss Alex," the teen spoke gently, "Our hospital is equipped with the latest equipment and have well trained doctors. While your arm regenerates, we can help you retain your physical well being."

He said our like he owned it. Was he..., "What is your title young man?"

He flushed and I realized I could read Anderson's surprise and embarrassment but nothing from this teen. Was he a Jacob puppet? Oh cyst! I was bedridden.

"I'm Bishop Ran Burkes the Second. I'm in charge of Internal Infrastructure. Orphanages, schools, hospitals and any programs dealing with those institutions."

"Ran?" what an odd name, and what programs was he in charge off?

"Randall, I prefer Ran. Like you prefer Alex instead of Alexendra."

"Are you a sociopath?"

He blinked, frowned, "I was going to put that in a kinder way, but the same back to you."

"I asked first."

"Alex, donna be rude ta the bishop."

"I don't hold to the same faith and you did kidnap me," me eyes slid to Anderson, "Or have you forgotten?"

"Father Anderson, you don't know me, but I think the reason we are asking the same question is similar. I'm telepathic. What is your talent?"

"That's the nicest term for it I've heard. Empath," I said it in cold tone.

This wasn't making me feel at ease. I didn't know if he just heard other thoughts or if he could influence others with his ability, like Jacob.

"Isn't it pleasant not to feel those emotions?" he sounded like this was a relief.

"I use to think so, but the advantages outweigh the silence," I missed Alucard and his constant craziness. It was like white noise that I suddenly didn't hear anymore.

He was a warmongering homicidal bastard, but he wasn't religiously judgmental. I valued that.

"I'm glad I can't hear your thoughts. It's pleasant. And Father Anderson, that won't work. She's not one of our faith. I doubt she thinks of me in that manner."

My eyes narrowed on Anderson, "What way is he referring to, Father Anderson?"

He just smiled like he was a good ol' priest to a young girl in his care, "Ye need na fret over it, Alex. He is most likely right."

My eyes swung back to Ran. He shook his head, "You don't need the stress of what he was thinking. You need to focus on regenerating your arm."

Most likely Anderson thought, "Here's a good Christian boy with mental powers. Match made in heaven."

Cysting bastard.

Wait, what the drat were they talking about my arm?

"You have said that twice now but that can't be true. I'm not a regenerator."

Ran pointed to me, "You haven't looked have you. In the ten hours you've been here with the correct IV drip, your broken arm is nearly completely mended, your ankles have returned to normal size and color, and you've grown two inches of your missing arm."

He had to be lying. I looked at my casted arm. The new cast was much thinner than the old one. I looked at my stump. Drat. He was right. Since I last checked, there was an extra three inches on it from my shoulder joint to where it was now.

I touched the wrapping, just to make sure they hadn't padded it. Pain jolted down my side, but it was true. It was me under there.

Rough cloth wiped at my face. I looked up in alarm at Anderson.

"It is alright, meh granddaughter. Yer arm is growing back. Ye'll be up and scolding meh in no time."

I touched my cheek, found I was crying. They had screwed up, nearly killing me, yet here they were, healing the damage done. I would be whole.

"Correct drip?"

I had to know. As much as I appreciated this right now, I couldn't trust them all. Especially Marvin. Ran...well he could be lying. Just like Sonny. I really came to rely on emotions to guide me. With someone I couldn't read, I was as blind as a normal human. Which was the worst scenario to be in while injured.

Then the man who had killed the poor old lady that had ended with me in that first institution walked in with a big welcoming smile.


	34. Blows and Pages

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the review: Kaida Ukitake.

Let's hope everything turns out for the best.

;-)

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I had been careless. I let my guard down. This is why humans died. I now recognized his emotional signature. I hadn't been as experienced in emotional differences when my empathy first awakened, but this was the one that had made the biggest impression on me. Its possible I had withdrawn into my shields due to the shock of my arm regrowing, or the overload of whatever was in the "proper drip" or maybe I truly was insane and my mind wasn't doing what it had to survive chaos.

At least I matched Alucard then.

"Father Brendan," Ran greeted, "Thank you for coming so quickly."

Anderson spoke harshly, his jaw ticking again, "Why did ye involve him?"

"Now Father Anderson. His trainer was killed that night and he barely got out alive himself. It's a pity that there was a secondary threat to your family."

What were they talking about? This man killed a defenseless old woman. His urges for murder had blazed so brightly that my budding power had latched unto him, making me experience his depraved pleasure, feel her terror as she was brutally and methodically executed by him. They said you never forget your first kiss because of all the emotions you go through. Well, that day this man had taken part of my innocence, perverted my mind. I wasn't staying here one moment longer than I had to. Father Brendan made it a priority to escape.

I knew I had to take a bag of the drip when I made my escape. I'm sure Integra would want to replicate it for me. To speed my recovery. I wouldn't be armless for long.

Anderson growled, "Ah donna want him ta guard Alex. Ah will stand watch until she is well enough ta fight herself."

Father Brendan brushed back his short strawberry blonde hair, "Well on that note, Archbishop Marvin is demanding your return to Rome, Father Anderson. He's incensed you acted without orders then brought Alex here instead of Rome. This location is too close to England."

Oh? Then I could more easily escape. I sure hoped they didn't know the land well enough to cut off my escape.

Wait. How can one stop paper? Answer: No one could. If I timed it right, I could escape, looking like Anderson paging away. I needed a book. Then I could cover a great deal more distance. Here's hoping my page teleport didn't make my head hurt. My telekinesis was an issue right now.

"Ah willna leave Alex in yer care. Ye have yet ta prove ta meh ye deserve such a delicate matter."

"What is going to happen to me?" I looked up at Anderson with what I hoped was realistic fear, "What do you mean he failed your family?"

"Miss Alex, you don't need to fear the darkness anymore. We will protect you. Father Anderson, you didn't give the boy a chance when the experience would have aided you both. Allow him to redeem himself in your eyes as he has in God's."

I was betting God was blind to allow Brendan to be free and not in a cage for the rest of his detestable life. There was no redemption for murdering an innocent nor the guilty. You were stained forever with that burden. To paraphrase Lady MacBeth, this spot of corruption does not show to anyone but me, yet in my heart I am unclean through and through for taking the life of my liege and dirtying my husband with the deed.

Killing an innocent holds more weight than the sinner, but to someone like me, that stain is one and the same. A life is precious, irreplaceable in the series of decisions. Destroying one person can ripple out in unexpected ways. That old woman could have sheltered a battered child, turning their life around to better themselves. She could have brought happiness to the new couple on the block with a warm welcome. This self important priest had slain her as if she was a dragon, when she had simply stepped out into the glade as a unicorn.

Selfish knight.

Anderson glared, "Ah donna give second chances. This is yer only chance ta prove yerself a man of God."

"Since you are leaving, don't bother coming back," I hoped this made him pause and regret, "You are abandoning me to the monsters with handsome faces."

He turned sighed, "Alex, ah must go ta his holiness. Ye are safe here from devil spawn if it come from Hell or the heathen Integra."

"Ha! You are flashing off to some distant place, forgoing your family yet again for the glimmer of glory you think your God demands."

"God doesna give glory. Ah serve ta destroy the monsters."

"You aren't doing such a good job. I believe even Doctor Abraham Van Helsing did better than you have. He didn't have regeneration to help with the aches of old age."

"That heathen left the worst of the undead alive. Ah wouldna have spared that monster from Hell. He will destroy yer light and bring ye into a darkness."

"Whoa, what in the collective decision pool are you talking about? Abraham destroyed Dracula in the book."

He pulled out two thick leather bound books, "The first ye should read ta realize yer eyes were closed ta the danger he presents. The second ta draw comfort from."

He set both on the dresser then stalked out.

Dracula was still alive? Was he trying to make me doubt Sir Integra? Was he implying that Alucard was the basis for the vamp story? I could actually see that. Oh drat. If it was true, I was rooming with the most famous vamp of them all. I didn't count the current vamp trend in novels. The whole vegan vamp thing didn't work.

I'd have to ask Alucard. Would he tell the truth? It would be amusing to find out. Did it change my feelings for him if he was the original Dracula? We would see. To the job at hand. Get rid of both Ran and Brendan.

I was so running for it. Anderson had left behind the key to my earthly salvation as it were. Books. Perhaps he thought me unable to use any book but the bible, like him?

"I suppose he left me reading material," I hefted the first book with my only functional arm, propped it on my knees, opening to the first page.

Yep, Dracula by Bram Stoker. I hadn't ever read it myself, but references to it were through so many other books, movies, songs and plays at it was a common knowledge trivia most could call up. At least this should keep me entertained until an opportunity presented itself.

"Did the Archbishop say anything else, Father Brendan?"

Brendan's smile turned evil, as did his emotions. The next instant Ran was hanging limply from Brendan's supporting arms.

"Now that Father Anderson is out of the way, our plan can continue," Brendan set Ran down without a sound, looked at me with a wide smirk.

I began the page teleport using the second book, keeping the pages still so not to betray my planned escape.

"Let me guess, you betrayed my family for immortality? Condemned them to die for extended life on this mortal coil?" my tone was disdainful, "I suppose being a vamp is well worth giving up your soul for, Brendan?"

"You don't believe in souls. Sonny made that clear in his final report," Brendan purred, "Which means you don't mind the thought of eternal life. You will make an excellent No Life Queen."

"To you? Is that what gets pathetic priests like you hard? Subjugating women to your will and making them dolls to be played with?"

The blow danced stars across my vision but I held unto consciousness and my page teleport in progress. I mentally locked unto the IV drip bag so it would come with me, while my head cleared of the spots.

"You will be given the greatest gift a woman could want. Eternal beauty."

"For who would bear the whips and scorns of time, the oppressors wrong, the proud man's contumely, the pangs of despised love, the laws delay, the insolence of office and the spurns that patient merit of the unworthy takes, when he himself might his quietus make of a bare bodkin?" I looked into Brendan's eyes making him take a step back, "You are the boat that turned awry and lost the name of action, Father Brendan, whilst I have forged ahead with pure resolution casting aside the cowardly conscience and sickly thought."

He snarled, "Do not quote such a base man to me, Alex. He tossed away his chance to gain immortality from an angel. He died instead of seize the day."

"Is that what you are hoping for? I'll seize being a vamp from some two face punk you managed to keep alive?"

"Ah, you are referring to Jacob. He did not do as he was told. He only needed to attack you in that airport then you would have been ours. Instead he began snacking on the scum there, alerting that selfish bitch Integra about this."

Click. It's was like a million piece puzzle that you had suddenly put together half the picture, "You were the one to drop me the info that Anderson couldn't come into England. You waited for me to arrive to snatch me. What is the death or disappearance of one more American in London?" I had walked into it like any fool.

He smiled, "You'll be our new Eve."

"Eve of what? Crazed monks?"

The next blow nearly made me lose my teleport, but I held on, building the energy so when it went, it would be an explosion. Too fast for him to react to, but not so much to make me sick.

"I didn't falter from the path intended for me to lose this one to an ignorant girl. You will bring about an evolution to the most feared monsters, allowing them to propagate even better than the weak Nazi copies."

I could barely hold the paging energies as they pushed to be released, "I won't aid you."

"You can't fly from here little girl. You have not the strength to raise more than empty defiance to me."

I let loose the pages.

I screamed soundlessly as I was rushed from the room in a flurry of pages. I had gone a little too long. My skin felt like it was being cut by leafs of paper.

"Paper cannot save you, Alex. You'll be hurting when Jacob bites you."

I dropped down towards the floor, flinging my protected self into the ventilation, dodging fans and fierce updrafts. I felt the pages containing the IV bag brushing my side. At least I got away with it.

Bursting from the last grate, wind swept me out over a garden and a pile of black and white cloth. I reached out and gathered some of the heap into my pages then gave into the wind, letting it blow me out over the land.

Hours of nearly empty countryside flashed by underneath me until a decent sized town appeared, brightly lit.

I landed in a field a short walk from the first building, dropping the clothing to the ground, holding unto the IV bag with my hand. It was intact, half full. In spite of the sensation of being cut the entire time to here, my skin was unblemished. I was safe and as whole as I could be. Well, for a few minutes anyway but I needed some way to contact Integra and to vanish.


	35. Meeting of Old and New

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the review: Kaida Ukitake.

Let's hope everything turns out for the best.

;-)

Additional AN: Corrected Anderson's speech to include two "ye"s were he seemed to go to the usual you.

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I knelt and perused the pile I had stolen. Borrowed meant I intended to return it. Not so with this.

The skimpy hospital gown fluttered in the wind as I matched up clothing in sets.

Two preacher outfits missing the collar, and one nun outfit which may end up being too small for me.

If I went as the preacher, I'd stand out. Women didn't wear priest clothing. Dratted religion. Why couldn't Anderson belong to a religion where men and women wore the same outfit?

Nun outfit it was.

In minutes I was sheltered from direct wind exposure. Didn't have underwear so if anyone managed to look up the skirt that dropped to three inches above my ankles, they'd either think I was naughty or was posing. Wrapping the other outfits into a bundle with the IV bag secured in the center, I walked into town.

It was quiet, still in the early morning hours. I scanned, sensing a few people awake and working, and some dogs alertly watching me for transgressive behavior. I made my way to the center of town.

Cyst. A church. Two inside. A man and woman.

I turned to move further into town when the woman's emotions spiked with compassion and concern.

A door creaked open, "Lassie?"

I paused, looked back inquiringly, "Ma'am?"

"Donna, ma'am me, lassie. We may na be o' the same denomination, yet we are sisters in faith."

I didn't really think so I replied, "I don't think we are of the same faith, Sister."

"Ah," a creaky voice came with the bent body of the man, "You are on a pilgrimage, lass."

I held up my hands, "No, you are mistaken."

"Lass, we get all sorts who are questioning God here. Come inside. At least a warm bed and a good meal would set you rights afore the menfolk get up and may be able to take you further up to Ennis," he shuffled inside, "This cold wind is not good for my bones so please be quick."

I was a humanist, so the least likely place for me to be hiding would be in a church. I bowed my head to play the role of a humble pilgrim trying to resolve my faith. I sure as cyst hoped they didn't find out and rat me out to Anderson, or if I was unlucky to Brendan.

"Thank you, Sister, Father," I stepped inside, helping the Sister close the door.

"Ye are lucky. Tonight is a blood moon," the Sister patted my shoulder, "Oh, ye have grown since ye last had yer robes taken in."

I looked down, figured she was better off with that assumption than knowing what I was and who I worked for, "I guess so. At least I can still wear them. That is good enough for a traveller."

"Ye sound of the Americas. Ye are far from home, lassie."

"I came to this country to find my way," that was the truth.

A path solely mine without the interference of Anderson and monsters. Yet here I was. Smack in the center of them. One of them possibly the basis for a story that echoed in the minds of all humans. Blood-drinker, vamp, nosferatu, demon.

"Come this way, lassie. Ye'll be better with a bowl o' stew. We only have a pallet for ye ta rest though."

"That is alright, Sister. It is better than a cold doorway."

"Ye would have slept in a doorway? How odd."

"There are many who would not welcome a stranger into their midst, for they fear the earthly devil than the fiend in Hell. Or would take in rubbish to profit," I sighed, "This path has shown me few acts worthy of Angels or Saints, and plenty of greedy men."

"Pity they forget the morales of Beauty and The Beast. Those of the least appearance often are the best of us, lass," the Father sat on a pew, rubbing his gnarled hands, "I can tell from your words and actions that you are strong to follow a path many women have abandoned quickly for marriage, though it seems you have an offer."

I looked at Alucard's ring, a moment of delight that I hadn't lost it. What was wrong with my head? Probably too exhausted, or I was still purging drugs from my system. I should have checked sooner.

"I don't even know if he is serious, Father."

"If he gifted such a ring then he is serious. Would he be from our fair shores, lass?"

"He's in England, where my ship came to port for the first leg of my journey here, Father."

He raised a hand, "Please call me Sean. That is Agatha."

"As you wish, Father...Sean."

"Here, lassie. Have some o' meh stew ta warm your belly and body."

I took the stew, sensing nothing but Good Samaritan emotions from these two. Better than some of the stuck up collared priests, nuns and preachers I had the misfortune of meeting in America. Including the institution one that insisted that only God could save me. I had made it a point to ignore him, or quote Shakespeare. He hated anything made by the Bard.

"I am grateful to find a house of God willing to shelter me for a night. You were right in that the winds were beginning to become bitterly cold," the first sip of stew settled my stomach instantly, "I forget the last time I had a meal with good company."

"Aye? Then it was fortunate ye found yer way ta us, even if we belong ta different sects," Agatha hummed happily, "Perhaps, ye can tell us o' why ye lost yer faith?"

The truth would be best here. I'm sure they would appreciate this.

"I love quotes from many authors outside of any religion or creed. One that prompted my disillusionment of...to be frank with you, of any religion was from Edmund Burke. 'The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.' I saw all the wars, violence and self-centeredness of so many and wondered why no one did as they promised. We promise to aid this country with their aggression upon another to get at oil, land, routes. We never seem to aid for no aggression as it's the right thing. It put me into a state to realize that the reward of Heaven was equally greedy for acting good in this life was for a better one on the turn of our last breath," I sipped the stew, looked up at Sean and Agatha, "I didn't want to do good only for a heavenly reward. I wanted to do good for it was the correct thing to do. To help better this life so we don't so carelessly look only for the next."

Sean chuckled, "See Agatha. I am not alone in this world."

"Aye, ye have now a friend who donna know what ta believe. Ye are as duck to a swan."

"Well," I smiled sipping another spoonful of stew, "They are birds of a feather."

Sean laughed creakily, "I have spent some forty years looking for a woman of the same opinion and I had to be an old man."

"I'm sorry," was he one of those who serve the faith while they believed differently?

"Young ones these days are all about getting nothing for laziness. I believe your Americas have a story about a hen?"

"The bread maker hen?"

"Yes, that one. She worked herself at every stage and all the other animals don't lift a wing nor hoof to help her, lass. Then at the end they are struck silent by the realization they had no right to the fruits...well breads of the hen's labour."

I smiled, "I feel that is the case with anyone, faithful or not."

"Let me take a shot, you are leaning towards no faith?"

Agatha gasped, "Now Father!"

I held up my hand to stall her outrage, "That seems to be the path that has unravelled under my feet. I think it may be the best path as I do good for the sake of doing good. Not for heaven, not for greed, not for a reward."

Sean smiled, "I believe that good should be done for being good as well. I try to work inside this great body of religion to show that. Unfortunately, I am but a breeze against a hurricane, lass."

"Then you come to the quandary of achieving power to make changes and tempted by the corruption such a position holds."

"She talks as ye do when ye are tired, Father," Agatha huffed, "Perhaps ye two should move the stone uphill then?"

"Provided it isn't the one Sisyphus was forced to bear alone in Tartarus," I smiled.

"Ye donna know even one of yer own religion," she huffed.

"'Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might,'" I smiled, "always works well with Edmund Burkes."

"That is a rather curious one," Sean countered with, "'And you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.'"

I nodded my head, "From sight unseen to wildest imagination, we are but dust upon the wind and our actions the only memory carried beyond our last descendent."

"That was one our newest poets. How curious," Sean looked up as chimes rung in the distance, "Its already so early in the morn? My, my. Please do stay the night..." he shook his head, "I went straight into a discussion again. What is your name, lass?"

"Alexandra, though I imagine if I had been a man it was in honor of one of the great conquerers," a small half truth.

I was born Alexandra. Just never used it before myself.

Sean grinned, "Your folks must have been something."

"In the time I had with them, yes. Through times good, ill and chaotic, they were the ones I looked up to the most."

I missed them all the more without the company of those at Hellsing. Having the horny men, the iron willed leader, the crazy vamps, made this all the easier to bear that of my family, I was the last.

"Agatha, would you see Alexandra to a bed? I'll extinguish the candles."

"Are ye sure?" Agatha started as I offered, "I can assist in that."

We looked at each other, then we all laughed.

"Ah the vigor and politeness of youth," Sean stood, obviously in pain as he shuffled over to an open door, "I'll leave the two lasses to the chores, but do get to bed. We have to get her out to Ennis with the menfolk."


	36. Church and Vamps

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

'========-========'

Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the review: Kaida Ukitake.

Let's hope everything turns out for the best.

;-)

'========-========'

I smiled. It was brief as my situation began to tug on my attention.

Where was Ennis in relation to London? I'd need a map as soon as I could manage it.

Sean disappeared down a hallway leaving me with Agatha.

"Ye are na gonna turn him against God, lassie."

I blinked at her, frowned, "No word, no sentence can turn him aside the path he has chosen. He is the one who decides to take the fork, whether it be for the trail travelled most or the one he forges alone."

She sighed, "Ye make meh head hurt as much as he does."

"Then let us bank the candles so you go to bed and the easement of such pains."

"If ah dinna know better ah'd say yer his sister."

She stalked away from me.

I walked to the candles and gently blew the first one out. She started on the opposite end.

Working my way inward, I wondered how long before the word that I was gone reached Anderson. I highly doubted he'd come charging back, but what actions would he take that I could prepare for?

Would they risk putting out a missing person bulletin? Knowing Integra, she must have sources who'd pick up that and forward to her immediately. Was it better to stay in one place or to fly to troubles I know not of?

I was hoping my conscience did not make me cowardly, nor my thought disband my resolution. Yet, I had to consider that I was but one girl against a large organization. One with members endowed with powers from a rich technological age. Hiding wouldn't work long as so many searching fingers would eventually find me. If I could find a place to get transportation to England, from there I could try to call Integra.

Would Alucard tease me on how easily I got kidnapped? Oh, lovely. He had enough material now to bug me for the rest of my life.

I looked at his ring, aching from the echoing silence in my head and ears. Even Seras would be a welcomed interruption right about now.

I straightened as a clanging discordant tone joined the chimes. Agatha snorted angrily.

"That Thatcher boy had better na have damaged that there bell."

She started across to the door.

Vamps. Not here. Drat it!

"Sister Agatha, stay away from the door," I ordered, my body on alert as I scooped up my bundle, taking out the second book I had used for my teleportation.

"Why?" then she shrieked as the front doors were busted open.

Then she went flying past me, a thud followed.

Her emotions went out. Oh cyst, was she dead? Dratted vamps!

The maniacal grin widened on the boyish face that locked unto me, "Oy, nuns. Boys we hit the jackpot."

This wasn't Jacob. This was some stupid punk vamp.

Sean's voice cut in harshly, "This is a sanctuary of God. Depart!"

I had to stop them. Sean was an old man. He didn't need help to the grave.

The boy cocked his head, looked skyward, "I guess he has no feeling for this church."

Two more vamps joined him, both boys barely old enough to start growing fuzz. They were blood crazed already.

They stepped into the church, intent on murdering us. I guess this church didn't have a strong blessing. Pity. I wanted to be safe from these monsters.

Screw it. I wasn't allowing these people to die when I could do something.

"May God forgive you lads," Sean stated, "This church defends itself."

The left bloodlust vamp leapt at me.

I raised the reason barrier, using the pages from the book in my hands, "Let reason pave the way to true enlightenment, bloodsucker."

The pages exploded outward, slammed into the walls, ceiling, attaching to the vamp charging me. He gave a horrible screech before dissolving.

The second gasped, a...kitchen knife with a wooden handle sticking out of his head before he crumbled into ash.

The leader blanched, "Who are you?"

Sean walked forward, another knife in his hands, "Father Sean, retired Iscariot."

Cyst. I should have known this was too good to be a true haven. Drat. I actually liked Sean.

He'd hear about me soon enough, "Alex Jones-Jordan, Hellsing's civilian defense, active."

Sean looked at me, "By heaven, I was certain you were Anderson's get."

"He's my great grandfather, and I don't like him," I pointed at the vamp, "Move and I'll destroy you in the slowest possible way. I'm sure I'll laugh at your agony."

He froze, eyes going wide, "That smile. The Butcher of London."

Who the drat was he talking about? Who's smile did mine mirror?

"Okay, okay you win," he was breathing hard now, fear permeating his emotions, spiking with despair.

"Who is your mistress?" I scowled at him.

He was far too young as a vamp to be flying solo. I didn't sense her but that didn't mean she wasn't nearby. Feeding. Hurting everyone here.

"She'll eat your face, nun of Hellsing!" he snarled, anger trying to push through his terror.

"I'm a humanist, not a nun," my head raised, my eyes tracking to the doors as she finally came into my range, "Here she comes. Your life is forfeit for the protection of the true race of this world."

He inhaled to scream, but he dusted as Sean drove his dagger into his chest.

I looked around. The pages were still up, plastered over the columns and pews. Agatha was unconscious in front of the altar, a cross on a chain dangling from her neck, her hair caught under the silver links. Had Sean dropped that protection over her?

"So, his creator is on her way?"

"She is approaching. Who is the Butcher of London, by the way?"

"The monster who sucked in the blood of thousands."

"That could describe any number of beasties in this world, Father Sean."

He sighed, "I am not your enemy."

"Not at the moment. We have a vamp to deal with. Come on out you stupid git! I can sense your terror."

Pride and fury sparked into a conflagration of primal lusts, "You are one to talk."

Her voice was throaty, sultry. Obviously, she had honed her voice to snare men. How demeaning to all women. We could be smarter, stronger than them. We didn't need to seduce them in like wild flowers to bees.

"I am not afraid of a spineless bitch who makes boys into immortal toys instead of finding a real man."

She appeared beyond the busted doors, eyes red. She wore, of course, crimson red. Some girls need to seriously try other colors. Loser men only have eyes for that color. The better the man the more he appreciates other hues, tints and sometimes the dullness women wore.

She did the full body scan, then stiffened at my waist. What the drat was she looking at?

Her eyes narrowed, "You fucking whore. He is mine!"

I was puzzled by this sudden verbal attack, "Father Anderson?"

That would be really fucking amusing. This vamp girl following Anderson all around, saying things like, "Honey, I vant to suck your blood."

"The first of us. Our sire. Dracula."

Well, if I added Anderson's assertion that Alucard was Dracula, and that she was jumping to the same based on me possessing Alucard's ring, which I forgot about having on and that it may attract interest, then Alucard was Dracula, who in turn was Vlad the Impaler. Then came the question: What answer would I give her?

I smiled, "Oh? I'm Dracula's woman? That must singe your vamp sensibilities. A mere human has your master's undivided attention."

She gritted her teeth, made a move to approach, but electricity arced to her from my reason barrier.


	37. Holy Mary and Rosary

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

'========-========'

Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the reviews: Kaida Ukitake, cheezidorito, Rockmoss

Let's hope everything turns out for the best.

;-)

'========-========'

"You are safe in there but no one outside has your blessed barrier," she grinned as she looked over her shoulder, "Pity. For them."

I reached out to grab her with a barrier. Instead a spike lanced to the center of my mind. Nothing happened. Why couldn't I use my ability?

Sean threw a knife but she knocked it away.

Hundreds in this village. Smaller than my graduating class of high school. A loss of even one to a monster would break so many. I felt my teeth bare, a growl coming out of my throat.

The female went pale, "He couldn't have turned you. You are inside a blessed barrier."

"You scum are all the same. Eat, eat and eat. Make ghouls. You are a virus that kills the host by exterminating the healthy flesh. Devouring the world without thought or reason. You don't even feed because you are hungry," I stepped forward, watching as she backed up, "You are not even worthy of calling yourself a draculina. No fucking wonder Dracula has chosen me. Even being human, I'm far more intelligent on prey, predator ratios. I wouldn't gorge myself on humanity, spreading cancerous vampism nor ghoulism."

She snarled, "I am his perfect draculina."

I laughed, stepping to the edge of the the barrier, "If that is the case then why does he want me, pathetic little vamp?"

She stepped back, "I'll just feed on these people. My ghouls will burn down your church, Bride."

My hand wrapped her throat, pulled her into my barrier. She clawed at me as she dissolved, her red eyes terrified.

"You have such a girly attack. No wonder he likes me," I growled, "I'm killing you while I'm still recovering from an attack. You are at your prime," I watched her eyes dust, her face following.

Her neck crumpled, her whole body collapsing in on itself.

I relaxed my hand, "For dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return."

Drat, now I had dust on my hand and no way to brush it off, unless I wiped it on my robe. Then I'd have to have it cleaned.

A handkerchief covered my hand then wiped.

My eyes meet Sean's.

He gave a sad smile, "Why do I get the feeling that Iscariot is responsible for your missing arm, lass?"

I could feel his regret and a sense of farewell, "You said you were retired. It would be unfair of me to hold you to the actions of the current...administration."

"You are far more forgiving than I think you give yourself credit, lass," he shook out the handkerchief, "Alex, eh?"

"I prefer that to Alexandra."

"I will use the longer," he looked at Agatha as if to say while she was around, "To think enemies of old are now on the rise again."

"Would they force you back into service?" I could see him facing vamps, his creaky laugh, slow movements as they all charged him.

Norsemen would say he died an honorable death worthy of Valhala, but I knew vamps. They'd make him suffer as a ghoul long before he was released from earthly Hell to nonexistence.

"Force, no. But when this comes to my own village I would fight, just like you fought just now. You aren't of this village yet the threat to it's residents made you attack and kill a vampire."

"People should be allowed to live theirs lives, make their own decisions without the threat of monsters, murderers or madmen."

He smiled, "You don't fit with the current, as you put it, administration of Iscariot, nor the one just prior," he sighed, "When I retired was the last decent one. Archbishop James Sandford. He believed in saving all peoples, no matter their religious persuasion."

"Sounds like if we had meet, I would not have been set upon this path in opposition to Iscariot nor the Vatican. Dratted Marvin, Kate and Anderson."

"Sister Kate?" He blinked then slumped, "She darted you didn't she?"

"Sounds like it's a habit."

"She did it to me when I was pushing myself too hard, too fast. She's not strong enough to fight most of us so she develops darts to safely bring us down. She's done it twice to Anderson while we ran a few missions together."

I was confused, "She darted me while I was trying to return to Hellsing."

"Then she must have seen that you were hurting, perhaps killing yourself. She did that to Agatha's grandfather. He was a pyromancer. Got nasty migraines right before he started bleeding from the nose. She knocked him out when he tried to save this one," His eyes went to Agatha, "blood streaming from his eyes, nose and mouth, his breaths getting that rattle. Death rattle. He kept calling flame as I ran in from behind. He'd have died that day if she had not darted him."

Bleeding from the nose? Migraines? Was it possible that my telekinesis was on the fritz now because it had been killing me? That Sister Kate had darted me just as my head was beginning to rage with pain. When the men had gotten me out of that ghoul infested hospital they said I had been bleeding, as if I had a brain bleed. Yet by the time I got to the hospital, no brain bleed. How had that come to be?

"You tried something else before I threw my knife. The pain rippled up your back."

"I'm telekinetic as well as empathic, fath...Sean."

He stiffened, his alarm running in my head, "Then Kate must have had to shut you down before you burned yourself out. Those with mental abilities can't run on high power for long periods of time. When they took you, you must have fought back."

"I created a whirlwind of debris. I started to get my migraine aura."

"Sister Kate's ability makes her known to us who fight as Mender."

"Mender?" I frowned, then looked at the door, "The village is waking. They'll see the door is broken," I looked to Sean.

Only he was missing. Agatha was still laying there.

"Sean?"

He came back, held up a hand as he spoke into a phone that looked to be one of those big handheld sets when cellphones were first invented. Talk about bulky. I really appreciated my sleek one back home. I sure hoped I could return to use it again. Hmm, maybe get a really annoying ringtone for Alucard. I'm sure I could find something to make him leave the room.

"Kate, Agatha is not waking up and my newest pilgrim needs immediate care. Mental powers and running hot for at least a week. Bring only a few you know. My guess is that those in South America were not gentle with this one and may have been ours."

I felt his deviousness. He was getting Kate to come to me without the whole brigade? Then I could beat the drat out of her for darting me.

"She speaks Spanish or some such."

He was cysting lucky I knew enough to pull off the appearance, "Padre? Yo quiero dinero."

He blinked, looked at me, "I think she's asking for dinner."

He listened for a long moment, "I appreciate it, Sister Kate. I don't want him involved until we know where best is for her to recover."

He clicked the phone off, "She's mighty...aggravated. Marvin is playing in her river."

"That sounds like him. But has he pissed her enough that I will be allowed back to Hellsing?"

"Depends on how she feels after my deception."

"Hellsing is my home, Sean. The first person to listen to me is there."

"The vampire?"

"No," I shook my head smiling at that first meeting, "Sir Integra."

"It must have been lonely to have to wait so long until someone took you at your word."

"Another minus against Anderson."

"I have the feeling there is more to this than just Father Anderson," he looked at the door, "If you would look after Agatha, maybe pray, I will call the guarda."

"They'll know I'm not Christian. I've never prayed before."

"Do you know the words for Holy Mary in Spanish?"

"I heard them in my travels. I believe it goes like this. Dios te salve, María, llena eres de gracia, el Señor es contigo. Bendita tú eres entre todas las mujeres, y bendito es el fruto de tu vientre, Jesús. Santa María, Madre de Dios, ruega por nosotros, pecadores, ahora y en la hora de nuestra muerte. Amen."

He blinked, "If I didn't know you were an American, I'd swear to God you were from South America with that."

"One problem. I don't own a rosary."

"Is that all?" he smiled and I could see that once upon a time he had been a handsome young man. One I'd daresay turned the head of more than his fair share of bonny lasses in his prime.

He tossed something at me.

I reached out, realized only in time to raise my whole limb to catch it. Cysting Vatican. Dratted missing arm.

The beads were a dark rich brown, silky smooth. A rosary that had been held for years.

I looked up in time to watch him walk out into the light, the halo around his figure making him seem angelic. Pity. I think he'd give any stupid angel a run for their money. He was pure of spirit. More than any other Vatican agent I had met so far.


	38. Amen and Guarda

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Reviews are very welcome!

Darn, I guess the last chapter wasn't interesting enough to warrant reviews. ;)

Let's hope everything turns out for the best.

;-)

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I sank down to sit beside Agatha, rubbing the beads.

I inhaled very tired of all this. I longed for home. Maybe sit in the library or listen to the men sing in the barracks.

I began reciting the Holy Mary, keeping my eyes open. I looked at my pages, thinking that I should bring them back into a book form. Why didn't they dissolve? How were they sticking to the walls without nails or anything like that? My head hurt. I'd find out later.

With a thought all the pages flowed back into the bound leather tome. I caught it, setting it in my lap, seeing the title finally. An Bíobla Naomhtha.

"How did ye get an Irish Bible?"

I looked to Agatha, glad she was alive, though I didn't like her color nor the dazed look.

"My grandfather gave it to me, Sister Agatha," I put my hand on her shoulder as she started to sit up, "Don't move. Sean has gone for the police."

"The guarda? He shouldn't be out. His aches."

"He's more worried for you. The ruffians have run off. Couldn't take on facing a nun, a priest and a wandering disillusioned pilgrim. Now we need to see to your wounds. Sean has called..."

"Sister Kate?" she smiled at my expression.

"Yeah," did all the Vatican know of her?

"Its okay. She isn't a faith healer. Don't be so unhappy, Sister Alexandra," she patted my hand in an uncoordinated way.

"Please just sit back. I don't think you should be moving."

"What were you saying?" she smiled in a distracted way. Was that a sign of a concussion? How bad of one, if it was a concussion? Was she not remembering the short term events?

"You need to sit back."

"No, the Italian, but not Italian."

"Its the Holy Mary in Spanish. I'm sure if I heard you say it in Gaelic I'd be unable to understand it either."

"Sé do bheatha, a Mhuire, atá lán de ghrásta,Tá an Tiarna leat. Is beannaithe thú idir mná, Agus is beannaithe toradh do bhroinne, Íosa. A Naomh-Mhuire, a Mháthair Dé, guigh orainn na peacaigh, anois, agus ar uair ár mbáis. Amen."

I looked at her smirking face, sensing her amusement.

Cyst, no wonder she and Sean worked so well. Being a sister only made her different. She wasn't a cookie cutter nun.

A thought made me smile in return, "Do you think it would sound as beautiful when we say it together?"

She looked so surprised by that thought, "Do ye think it will be as divine?"

"Only one way to find out," I began reciting the Holy Mary, "Dios te salve, María, llena eres de gracia, el Señor es contigo. Well, aren't you going to try? Or is this wanderer too much for you?"

Her eyes sparked at the challenge, as Sean's emotions came closer with numerous others. The guarda?

I began the Spanish Holy Mary, as she smiled through her Gaelic version.

Surprise rang in my mind, before I turned my eyes to Sean and the Guarda. There were three of them, two men, one woman.

"If ah dinna hear it, ah wouldna believe ah was hearing two angelic voices singing one song," the older man, grinned, his good nature filling all the dark spots in my mind, eradicating the nastier tones to my emotions.

There were rare individuals that radiated an aura of happiness. Such individuals could calm a mob, remove depression, heal many mental issues. This was the first one I knew who choose a police position. The doctor that had freed me had the same ability. That was why many patients of his were permanently cured. Not me. My "insanity" was rooted in fact. Vamps existed.

"Que?" Drat. I forgot I fell back into speaking the language. Six months in South America had given me enough Spanish to mix fairly well with the locals, but not a native.

"Oh dear, language barrier," a female guarda sighed, "I'll go get a dictionary."

"This is Sister Alexandra. Try a bit more English, lass."

"Buenas...Good day," drat, I so didn't want to go back to Hellsing with a Spanish accent. That would only give Alucard even more material.

"Father Sean says that yer presence frightened the ruffians."

"Sí, oh yes! They wanted uno padre and uno hija. Yo...I not weak. Many...brigands in my path, they under worth?...me," drat, major cross of languages.

"Really? Why don't you sock, me?" the younger male guarda smirked.

"That be wrong. Tú ... You haven't hurt me."

"Now, now John," Sean smiled, "Sister Alexandra only defended our precious Kate. I called for a doctor who will be here shortly."

"Would that be that lovely lassie from the last time?" John looked thrilled, but his emotions went to sexual interest.

I managed to keep my mouth shut. Looked like Kate had an admirer. I wonder if I could use him to distract her. That would be an excellent revenge.

"Calm yerself, John. Go make sure the criminals arena waiting ta come back and assault our good father and sisters," the older guarda laughed at the disappointed look on John's face, "Go on. Make yerself useful."

John sighed, "Patrol duty."

He walked outside.

"Well Sean. Ye seem ta collect young ones in yer old age. Should we be concerned about ye?"

"Not at all. We are all devoted to God here."

I sensed another two people rushing our way. One I knew. Kate.

Boy, was she in for a surprise.

John was halfway to the door when his emotions fluttered. I think he spotted Sister Kate.

Oh, this was going to be good.

"Sister Kate, a pleasure to see you again."

From her, I felt puzzlement and curiosity, "Jamie, right?"

Ouch. That hurt. Poor John. He was deflated by that.

"John, Sister Kate. I'll be looking around the perimeter if you need me," even his tone had hint of the rejection he felt.

She rushed by Sean to Agatha, completely forgetting John, "Agatha, how are you feeling? Do you have any headaches?"

I stepped back, going to Sean, "Perhaps I should help."

"Go help John," he smiled as if he knew what was going through my head, "I'm sure the blow to that lad's pride needs a bit of soothing."

"That is for sure," the female guarda snorted, "He only has eyes for her. At least he doesn't hound the rest of us like the rest of the department."

I walked out after John, easily following him.

He whirled to me when I entered the back alley, "Jesus, Sister. You should be inside."

Well, here was my chance to screw with Kate as she fucked with me.

"I think that Hija Kate no quiero...what she wants."

"She knows what she wants," John sighed, "I've spoken to her five times in the last year. She hasn't remembered my name yet."

"She only remembers her people. Become one of her people."

"I like sex too much to join the ranks of the Holy Church."

I felt his dejection over her casual dismissal of his presence. She hurt him greatly not to even bother with getting his name correct.

"Perhaps you should try to make yourself stand out. Do you have a hobby?"

"Origami," he sighed, "Not one girl likes that."

"I know how to make the crane and the tulip. Its relaxing and creative."

He thought about it for a few minutes, "I have some paper in the car. I could make her a box."

"How about a rosary chain, only made of origami? It would only be good for looks, but it goes with her religion," I offered.

"Actually, I have a box of geometrical origami pieces. I normally donate them to the students."

"I can help you once we have finished our round."

"Thanks. You have helped enough. She'll be here for at least another hour. That will give me plenty of time. I appreciate your help, Sister Alexandra."

"You both would be good together. She needs to stop looking only at work," hopefully this would get her back to her family.

If she could easily forget this guarda, then what neglect were her children facing? Did she even sit down with them and help them with homework? Discuss the birds and the bees with them? I didn't want her to become like Anderson. Family comes first, then religion.

John finished the patrol, with me tagging along. Nothing jumped out at me as a problem. I was lucky this time. If there had been more vamps, or those with more experience, this village would be another decimated ghost town. Filled with ghouls.

I could tell they were keeping their streets tidy. Maybe they were going for that tidy village award. I sure hoped it wasn't like Hot Fuzz. That would be creepy.

"Hey, Captain, looks good here. Want me to put out the word to the station?" John asked once he walked back inside.

"Aye. Ah donna like a church in meh village getting desecrated. Come back when ye get the paperwork tagether."

John nodded and with high hopes went on his way.

"Thank ye, Alexandra."

I blinked at the man, "Why?"

He smiled, "How many months did ye spend in England?"

"Enough to ask for barra de pan."

"A what?"

I covered my face. I got use to languages fairly quickly so if I had to start using them again, my brain would sometimes cross wire what I wanted to say.

"Loaf of bread."

"Aye."

"Why are you thanking me?"

"Ye gave him either hope or a plan."

"Maybe," I smiled.

"At least ah can see if she remembers our fair guarda, eh?"

"I find him hard to forget. I can't imagine him being invisible."

"Pity he has only eyes fer her," he shook his head, "Still, she is a good doctor. She treats us well when she comes," his tone seemed to imply I didn't think highly of her, which was true.

"Is my...distrust that obvious?"

"Oh aye. As clear as bells ringing."

"Oh well."


	39. Village of Good Men and Women

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Reviews are very welcome!

Here's an extra long chapter. Hoping for some reviews or comments!

Let's hope everything turns out for the best.

8/8: Some corrections made to keep Alex's words in character.

;-)

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Kate worked for a long time, treating Agatha. She was methodical and focused.

No wonder she didn't remember John. She was totally on the job, all day, all night.

If she devoted that much to her children, I'd be just fine, but I wouldn't risk it. John seemed like a good man. He didn't have many of the negative emotions men had. And this village had a good overall feel, a captain with a calming presence and Sean. The only safer place would be Hellsing.

"Ye are pensive now, Sister Alexandra."

"Just concerned about her lack of attention beyond her job. Her family must suffer from that same devotion."

"Yer thinking that John may set her right?"

"Every person looks for companionship. To balance our needs, wants with those of others. Our selfishness comes about due to our isolation from others. She is on the cusp of becoming selfish. John would be good to bring her back from the brink."

"Do ye have someone who helps ye ta na be selfish?"

"Several. As well as those that help me not be so selfless that I sacrifice all that I am for small causes."

"Is that where ye got so hurt?"

I looked at him, then where his gaze was on my missing arm.

"I was hurt from a traitor. But with this time away from them, I realize I love. I don't want to be alone save for..." I was about to say Anderson, but hesitated.

Did everyone know him? Cyst, I had to be silent.

"Donna be ashamed of choosing another path. God is na the only path, sister. Some of us canna live with only God's love.

I was safe for another day.

"I hope my will to help others does not die, if I choose to leave the nunnery."

"Ah doubt it, Sister. Yer kind nature is there no matter if ye choose ta live as a sister or as a normal sinner."

I glanced at him, "Are you implying all sisters are sinners?"

He smirked, "Aye. All of us are sinners. Even a pretty sister as ye."

I didn't believe in God, I was currently wearing stolen clothes, waiting to ambush a real sister. I guess I was a sinner.

I blinked as John's emotions came closer, bouncing cheerfully.

Wow. He rebounded really quickly.

Sister Kate stood, sighing in relief that echoed in the church.

Agatha was peacefully asleep, now far from danger. She told Sean clearly that there was no concussion.

"What do you think, Sister Alexandra?"

I looked at John, then down to his hand and the rosary...wow.

My eyes rose to his, "I want it," I smiled at him, sensing his glowing hope, "I wish you luck with Sister Kate."

His wide grin made me long for Alucard's face. I would stand being taunted right now, if I got to see his smirk and listen to him argue with me.

"What if she doesn't like it?" his nervousness twisted in his happy emotions.

"I rather tell you the truth than a white lie," I gripped his shoulder lightly, "If she doesn't like this, then her heart is closed to someone as delightful and full of life as you."

He blinked at me, "Jesus, are you always this brutally honest."

"People may want white lies, but they are still lies. I rather know the truth no matter the pain," I looked at my missing arm.

It was very true. Knowing the truth about my enemies was allowing me to make better decisions. People think flip-floppers were bad, but those flip-floppers are those who are willing to change their minds and make the world a better place.

"I'll wait until she's done with all this. We'll see what she thinks," he started towards his fellow Guarda, "I'll go let Mary and Seamus rag on me first."

"Good luck," I smiled encouragingly, "with Kate. Not Mary and Seamus."

John spoke with his friends for several minutes while Kate argued with Sean.

Sean threw up his hands, sat down on a pew, looking entirely like a spoiled boy told he had to go to the dentist.

How amusing. I guess Kate was setting about to tend him too.

"Sister Alexandra!" Kate called, "I need to see to your wounds as well."

I rolled my eyes, then anticipation ran through my heart. Would she swear when she realized who I really was?

Oh cyst. Was this how Alucard saw the world? He was contagious. Where's an anti-Alucard pill when you needed it?

"Sí, Hija Kate," I walked up to the same pew and sat next to her while she was turned towards Sean.

She shook her finger, "Now, you take your vitamin supplements. I don't want to come down here to tend you when a pill a day..."

"Keeps la doctor away?" I smirked at Sean.

His lips quirked slightly, before he controlled his expression.

Kate sighed, "I don't need any more smart alecks."

She turned to me, smiled brightly, "Sister Alexandra, Sean says you are favoring your missing arm."

"Sí, I am not use to my loss."

She reached out for my empty sleeve, "Let's check. Infection is a tricky devil."

Rolling back the cloth, exposing my stump, she examined it, her mind focused, blocking out anything else. There was a brief moment for sorrow, but she pushed it down.

My arm was approaching the elbow joint in grow. Yippee. Maybe another day or two and I would be whole again. What would I do first? Hug Seras? Play my online game? Make a cake if I could convince William to let me?

Kate stiffened, shock and recognition chasing her eyes go wide as she looked up at me.

I swallowed my laughter, but I knew my lips were twitching with the need to smirk.

Irritation in her voice she scowled, "You are the same as Sean."

"Perhaps you should have respected my wishes so you do not deal with my wicked side," I said in a low voice, the smirk gaining my lips.

She rubbed her face, relieved, exhausted and frustrated, "You were about to burst major arteries in your head. I had to dart you or knock you out some other way immediately."

"Didn't think to take down Anderson and Hienkel? Letting me return to Hellsing?"

She threw up her hands, shouted, "I was wrong. You are worse than Sean."

Seamus and Mary laughed, looking our way, drawing her glaring gaze.

"Not a word," Kate growled.

John looked like a kicked puppy, with his sadness bringing down my enjoyment of Kate's ire. Drat it. Balancing two people's emotions were hard normally. I just hoped John came out of it happier and stronger.

Kate turned back, lowered her voice, "I admit that was a temporary solution to your issues, but you are in far more danger than you realize. Hellsing doesn't have the expertise to get you fully recuperated."

"I respect Sir Integra. She doesn't have such a high handed way of dealing with me. Your Vatican has belittled, hurt, chased and nearly turned me vamp."

"You assaulted Bishop Ran," she hissed, pulling a roll of gauze and a jar from her bag.

"Did I?" my tone was dark.

She paused, scanning my face. A dawning realization came through her emotions.

"Tell me what happened."

I told her all of it, watching her expression, while she smeared the jar's contents over my stump.

When I was finished, she carefully wrapped my stump. Her mind had to be running circles as her emotions twirled from disbelief, denial, sadness, anger, acceptance and fear.

Sean broke the silence, "And you still trusted me?"

"You are a good man in a world of greedy evil ones. You are not in the same group that did this, nor responsible for their actions. If you had been in service, they may have killed you before I could see the better side of the Vatican."

Sean sighed, frowning, "Troubling. Our people assisting the freaks in this. Yesterday, I would say that was impossible."

A jolt of pain dropped my gaze to my stump.

"That better not be the same test fluid, Kate," Oh cyst, please don't let this be my final moments.

"Absolutely not. I'm helping you get back to Hellsing and it's protections. This injection will accelerate your regeneration, and replenish your vitamins and minerals your body is using to heal. The arm will be fully recovered in twenty hours. During that time you will not be able to use your telekinesis and your empathy is reduced from the psychic suppressant."

"I can't go around without my defenses."

"It is a compromise. You were burning out. This forces a day's rest. Your powers were killing you. You were ignoring the warning signs."

"How were my powers killing me?"

"You are a full regenerator," she shook her head, her emotions amused, "I never would have thought it," she looked at me smiling, "You are as Anderson, just specialized. You were already at your max. You didn't need the test, and even if it got into your bloodstream as it did with our spy, you would have survived it, only it would have been a painful recovery."

"You are drifting off topic, Hija Kate," drat it, not Hija. Sister.

"The point is that your mental powers were frying your synapses, just like all the mental empowered individuals that impact the physical world. Telekinesis, pyrokinesis, cyrokinesis, gravitational kinesis. These twist the physical world. Empathy, telepathy, clairvoyance don't do the same level of damage to your brain, but still take their toll. Think of it as cutting your brain each time you use them."

"Then why am I...my regeneration healed the cuts."

"Exactly. Most of our agents with kinesis die before age twenty, or must have them suppressed like Agatha's grandfather so they can ease into the use of them in a controlled manner. Your regeneration allowed you to use your abilities at a daily level without killing you nor reducing your potential. Your healing was all up here," she tapped her head, "you didn't get physically hurt or by the time you noticed the minor damage was already taken care of and your regeneration was back to maintaining your synapses. Broken toe, instantly a sprain, then your healing went back to it's normal source."

John's voice cut in, as he leaned over her shoulder, "So that's how you knew I was upset."

I jumped as Seamus and Mary came over. Drat. I hadn't sensed them move. I glared at Kate.

"So she isna a sister?" Seamus asked.

"This is Hellsing's guardian angel, Alex," Kate smiled up at them, "With the knowledge I have obtained from her, I think your son can come off the drugs in a year, Seamus. Mary, your younger brother could come into his own without the pain," she turned to John, "you could be using your abilities so we can see what they are."

My jaw dropped. All of them had or knew of someone who could use their powers like mine.

"Donna look so surprised, Sister...Alex," Seamus stated, "Ah knew ye had ta be powered. Meh aura parted from ye as the waves do a rock."

I wasn't alone. These people understood. They knew the trials I had come through. Why hadn't Anderson brought me here? Why hadn't he suggested I come to this village even for a moment?

"Alex," Kate continued, "You should have been incapacitated in the vampire hospital you cleared. You had traces of the same drug we employ with...John," I think me and John stared at her, me for her use of his name, as she continued, "but you weren't suppressed by it. Instead your body somehow neutralized it. With what you said about Brendan, he got our Hellsing spy to start you on those drugs weeks ago, most likely in your migraine medicine."

"Sir Integra had me replace the dry pills with gel when I said those helped me faster. I was off the pills Sonny gave me."

Kate blinked, "It would take months to get off that drug as the combination is used only with extreme cases. I only authorized that level for John and two others. John's ability was doing damage at even minimal levels."

"Months?" Yet I hadn't been hampered. Hurt yes, but my powers had still been usable.

"That is why I said neutralized. You have a natural inhibitor. Your brain gives you a warning in the form of your migraine long past when others would do serious damage. It seems that your body also has developed a unique method of prolonging your usage of your powers. You could eat seven times your body weight in food, but never gain an ounce in fat. You store energy for use. Anderson also stores the energy but he doesn't need to eat for his attacks."

"His attacks don't use telekinesis," I pointed out.

"Exactly. Your powers burn up excessive amounts of that energy to use your normal attacks. Hellsing," she grimaced, "as much as I despise saying this, they were supplying you with constant food to build up those stores, medicine so you could recover quickly, accommodations that were only breached by invitation or powerful enemies that could handle your roommates. They prevented you from having an aneurism as Agatha's grandfather did saving her. He died within hours. You haven't come close because the Hellsing teams are constantly looking out for you. You have one of the top military medical doctors on the Hellsing team, who has been in constant communication with Dr. Fentonfield, whose the top neurological surgeon in the world. Those men know you help reduce the number of ghouls they have to deal with by protecting civilians. That's why when the rocket blast hit your shield and you lost consciousness, Mel dragged you to safety."

"If ah had a team that devoted ta it's powered individuals," Seamus stated, "we'd clean up the infestations of the vampires."

I looked at Sean, "Why didn't you tell Seamus as soon as he arrived that there were vamps?"

"That would have tipped them off you knew about vampires, and I didn't know their opinion of Hellsing. They would have come to the conclusion of who you are, and most in the Vatican do not view that organization in a friendly way, Alex," Sean sighed, "I should have known that you would be just fine."

"Oh, aye," Seamus clapped me on my shoulder, "This pretty lassie has nothing ta fear here. Just wonder why the esteemed father didn't bring her around ta meet us. She would have had fun with the young uns," he sighed, "Ah suppose that ye need ta get back ta Hellsing."

"Yes. That is where I can do the most good. Please let me go back."

Kate scowled, looked down, "This will slow down my research, but considering your enemies and the plans the Vatican have for you, it's best that you return."

"Let me guess, the Vatican plans are to get me pregnant as soon as possible with a selected male of their choice? Which was why my ovum was taken by your spy?"

She blanched, "How did you know that?"

I raised an eyebrow, "My opinion of the Vatican's methods has dropped considerably with that confirmation, Hija Kate."

Maybe by the time I got back to Hellsing I wouldn't have an accent or any random Spanish words added in my sentences.

Kate snorted, "And Anderson is the mean one? Ha!"

Sean covered his face, "Dear God."

I could sense some pain and guilt from him, but that wasn't congruent with his tone. As if all of what had happened to me was too much for him.

I stood, went to him, "Sean? None of this is your fault."

"Good God," he looked at me in horror, "Why do you still bear to be touched by any of us after such an affront?"

Silence is golden. By telling them, I had made him suffer.

"Sean, I can stand it because not every face I meet is hiding putrid anger, not every hand lifted is to strike me down," I cupped his cheek, faintly embarrassed when my stump lifted in the same motion, "not every Catholic, Muslim, Buddhist, Jainist, Mormon, Atheist or any shade between is my opponent nor oppressor," I kissed his forehead, "Humanity can breed great evil, but so can it raise men equal to any angel."

His eyes teared up, but the guilt and pain eased.

"Sean meh boy," Seamus gripped Sean's shoulder, "Ye gonna be alright?"

Sean inhaled, sighed, "It is harder for one as old as me to see one so young already jaded."

I smiled, "Parts of our world preserve innocence as this village does. It's a pity I was not brought here. My disillusionment would have been avoided."

"Then you would not be the woman you see right now, Sister Alex," Mary stated, "You may even be someone weaker than yourself this minute."

Sean took my hand from his face, patted it with both of his, "Your news tears my world apart, yet just as swiftly you mend it anew."

"True," I smiled, "And this self is ready to return to my home and work as soon as possible."

"I guess I'll have to convince Ran to open communication to Hellsing so I can continue to keep your health in good condition. This has become very political," Kate scowled, "Politics should be banned from scientific research."

"Maybe Alex's lucky fellow would assist in that," John offered, making me look up at him in surprise, "Who is he?" his gaze dropped to my waist.

It took me a long moment to realize he was referring to the ring. Alucard's ring. Cyst it, Alucard. You still cause me trouble when you aren't around to mess with my hair.

"We'd have to get her back to him first," Kate smiled, "Take the advice of an old nun. Have fun while you can. Then you will the rest of your life repenting."

I scowled at her, "Señora, you have a wicked mind for such a youthful woman."

Drat it. I did it again. Maybe I could turn this into an irritation for Alucard. Maybe he detested Spaniards. Except then he'd probably want to kill me. You lose, you lose.

Kate chuckled, "So my family says on a daily basis. I'll give you a lift to a transportation hub so you can get to England. That will burn Marvin."

Sean stood, "Alex, stand firm in the face of evil and you will surely defeat it."

"I prefer, 'to take arms against a sea of troubles and by opposing end them' but the other works," I smiled, sad I had to leave, but maybe future visits would be possible, "though if evil has a gun, I may be outmatched."

Seamus' rolling laughter filled the church, "Aye. If only ye had been brought around ta us earlier. Ye'd have been a happy addition. Now ye'd be trouble."

"I'm not that bad," I was offended.

"Na ye. The boys would keep meh up all night chasing them from ye windows. Sister Kate, get her on home and ta her young lad. Alex, give yer lad a kiss from meh."

I smiled, even though I was pretty sure Alucard would not appreciate the humor of that statement.

"Shall we go, Hija Kate."

Seamus gave me my bag of stuff, "Ye may want ta invest in some normal clothes, Alex."

"I'd rather take the ridicule on the far end and get there quickly, Seamus."

Sean caught my hand, "Keep the rosary so that you travel in dark places with light and angels at your side."

"Sean, it will leave you without a blessed," he tapped a finger on my lips silencing me.

"In your arms is our blessed book. Upon your hip is our prayer beads. Over your shoulder is the army of heaven," Sean smiled, "Go, Alex."

"That is not from any poet I have read."

Seamus smiled, "That is Sean's personal blessing."

Kate took my arm, "Come on. I think we can make the Annabel."

"Annabel?"

Sean's phone rang, he answered as Kate escorted me out the broken doors.

"Anderson, your granddaughter is not here. If she was I have no right to hold her against her will."

I froze. Oh cyst.


	40. Invitations to Fly

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the review: 3tailed fox

I went back and reread the whole train to now and, oh cyst, Alex has done enough to last several lifetimes. Here's hoping she has as many lives as a cat.

;-)

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"Now Anderson, how can you believe a dream? I'm sure your granddaughter is fine where she is," Sean scowled, "Yes. Kate is here but some of our immortal friends decided to throw Agatha around."

Sean listened, his expression curious, "Well, that conversation sounds like one I would enjoy having. I do so relish discussing the human condition with like minded individuals. Very rare these days. A nun outfit? Perhaps we should put out an alert on all nuns?"

Sean's amusement seemed to turn the conversation, "Anderson, if your granddaughter, Athena isn't it? Oh, Alex? I think Athena would have suited her more if she's causing you this much trouble. Eh? Alexandra. Is that suppose to mirror your full name? Kin to naming the son same as their father? You didn't get an answer? Pity."

He paused looking at me, making a shooing motion, "I will keep my eye out for a one-armed nun who's in her early twenties. I can't promise I'll hold her. You know I won't force a woman into a corner, just like you didn't force the heathen leader of Hellsing to accompany your regiment of Iscariot."

What? Anderson had surrounded Sir Integra and he hadn't captured her? Why? He disliked all heathens.

"Yes, I think even one man forcing a woman into a position she doesn't want is akin to rape. Perhaps your dear granddaughter felt the same?" Sean sighed, "Very well. I'll be waiting. You can knock some sense into this old block of a head."

Sean hung up, "Why are you still here?"

"I wanted to hear what he was saying. So he dreamt I was here?"

"Said he was in your body, arguing with me using Edmund Burke, and our discussion that followed. Very odd, but considering your circumstances understandable."

Kate froze, "Alex, you knew about me before we were introduced."

"Do you think Sir Integra's information network is less than yours?" It was an evasion and omission.

I didn't want the Vatican to know I could see through Anderson's eyes, but I would have to let Integra know immediately.

What would happen if we dreamed at the same time? Would we share dreams? That was creepy, especially considering my rather descriptive dreams.

Oh cyst. Since I had bunked with Alucard, my dreams had become sexual in nature. I so didn't want him to see that, nor did I want to see anyone he was interested in. He was my grandfather so he had to have urges.

"She has to go. Anderson will not see it my way, nor yours Kate. She needs Hellsing now."

Kate nodded, "Let me check with John before we go. I forgot to see how his stock of pills are. Sean, would you take her to the helicopter?"

"Ah'll take her," Seamus offered his arm, "See ta our fair man, Sister Kate."

I took his elbow and let him lead me out. I had a lot on my mind now. Asking Alucard about his real name, on any other previous draculinas that might be gunning for my head, and if he planned on teasing me to death...well not death, about being captured.

I had to tell Integra about the dreams Anderson was now having of me. Would this mean I would be taken off active duty?

A sharp pain lanced my heart.

"Ye alright, Alex?" Seamus frowned at me.

"Just a bad thought. Negativity will not get me to where I need to go."

"Ye know that ye are welcome ta come back?"

"I am?" I looked up at him, studying him.

"Ye must have had it hard ta na trust anyone. Ye are one of us. Ye may have brought us back ta what we love. Ninety percent of us in this village canna use our abilities or we risk death. Even ah have ta have some of the drug ta calm meh head after rough months. Ye have given us a way ta face the evils of this world and show them that we are better than those mongrels who have been serving our holiness."

"Wait," I considered him, "you are saying that the only active talents are Father Anderson and Hienkel?"

"Use ta be more, but the London Massacre devastated us. Lost many friends in that. With yer help, we can be merciful ta the weak, and destroy the monsters that seem ta be spreading faster than before."

A change in the leadership of Iscariot. Would it be for the better? Would it worsen this?

"I bring trouble wherever I end up, Seamus. The people here deserve better than the bloodshed that tracks me."

"Ye need ta see others or ye may end up thinking the world ye enemy. Even Anderson needs a break ta reestablish his will ta fight. Ah know that yer time here has replenished yer reserves. Ye are bitting at the bit ta fight the good fight. Ye heart longs ta save others even as yer body is ta weak ta continue."

"I wish you were the head of Iscariot. I think a union would be more possible."

He laughed, a rolling rumble of glee, "Ah have no head fer that. Ah hate politics. There are a few here who'd take up the mantle. Even our poster boy, Ran."

"Bishop Ran?"

"Aye. So ye have met him?"

"Briefly. We are...null zones to the other's talent."

"He must have loved that. He often has troubles in large crowds, or at least when he was in this village."

The helicopter appeared around the edge of a building. It was a lovely sight. Home. I would be back soon.

To Alucard's taunting voice. Cyst.

Without my normal powers for twenty hours. I sure hoped that the collective decisions of the monster and Vatican worlds left me clear so I didn't need to use my reason barrier. It seemed to work without my telekinesis.

"Here's yer chariot, meh lady."

I glared at Seamus, "You may think yourself handsome, but you need to work on your lines. Handsome and brains is better than just brawn."

He handed me into the helicopter, his booming laugh filling the town as Kate came running up, blushing furiously.

I spotted the reason for her red hue, hanging from her waist.

John's origami rosary.

I had Sean's.

I looked beyond Kate to Sean.

He smiled, as if to say, "You'll be back, lass."

I smiled. Seamus was right. This...interlude had revived my spirit. I was fighting for the whole of humanity. I now had one more town to keep in my heart, under my protection.

Sean's lips moved while Kate settled in her seat, and though I couldn't hear him over the blades whirling faster overhead, I knew what he said.

"Go with God, as his guardian angel."

"May your section of humanity's collective pool flow with joy," I said back, hoping he read my intention as well as mine.

He nodded.

The helicopter took off quickly. Too quickly for my liking, yet not fast enough.

Sean. Thank you. You gave me the strength to continue on. It is a pity there are not so many of you out there. If Iscariot had you, none of this would have happened.

My family might have settled here, where I could have been happy.

Yet, if that had been, I would never had found my path. I would be a lesser person. Weaker against the monsters of this world. I had my task.

I looked forward.

Defeat my enemies.

Sir Integra's voice echoed in my head.

Search and destroy. Leave not a single target alive. You will leave nothing but blood and ash in your wake.

Yeah. Monsters beware. Alex Hannah Jones-Jordan is coming.

I may be armless, and currently powerless, but I will not let you take humanity's love of life. I will not let you win one more battle. I will not give in an inch to your depravity and insanity. This world is mortal heaven, and you aren't welcome.

Kate gasped, drawing my gaze.

"I don't want to know what made you smirk like that."

I laughed, and it felt insane and bloodthirsty.

I think if Alucard had been here, he'd have grinned like Cheshire Cat, then told me to fight him, his eyes glowing with delight.

I'm coming home Fang Boy. You better be fucking ready when I'll at a hundred percent. Maybe this time I'll be the victor. Well, in my head anyway. Oh cyst it. That's the future.

I still had miles to go before I sleep and vamps weren't going to wait for me to be ready.

Jacob and Brendan could be in my path when I reached England. They may know or expect I'm weakened. They needed me.

Evolution. Eve. What the drat did they think I could do? What did they see in me that would make me No Life Eve?

No Life Queen? What the cyst was that? I certainly wasn't regal enough to be a queen. Plus I didn't have the pure bloodline. What was Brendan up to?

He tried tempting me with what a shallow woman would want.

Eternal beauty, eternal youth.

Yet like any decent seducer would have done, he neglected to know me. Know who I was at my core.

Alucard knew how to tempt me, but if he was the Dracula of the stories, he's had time to practice.

"What's our ETA, Sister Kate?"

"An hour, if we are lucky. I will purchase your ticket. You up to being a nun for a while longer?" she taunted.

"Are ye up ta the task of facing a verra angry Father?" I taunted back.

I know I was tempting fate to be retaining an accent, but it felt so good to give as much as I took.

She snorted, "You sound so like Seamus, its scary. Are you sure you two didn't switch places?"

"Are ye...you disappointed I didn't switch places with a certain handsome guarda?"

She flushed red, "You put him up to it!"

"Not a bit. He was so hurt by your forgetfulness, I merely offered an open ear, to ease your dagger from his heart."

"I am not seducing him."

"I said nothing of seducing him," I leaned into her space, "But curious that you mention it now. Are you so sure you didn't lead him on then simply forget?"

"Sean, you bastard!"

The helicopter dipped, making me glare at the pilot.

He gulped. Obviously, Sister Kate didn't curse often, or he was paying more attention to us than flying.

"Flyboy, eyes on the sky."

"Yes, sisters."

"Goddamn it," Kate scowled at me, "Are you going to make me suffer for darting you for all eternity?"

"Nope, just a section of it."

"No wonder you drive Anderson crazy.

I drive him crazy? Good. Served him right for infringing on my life. If I decided to say yes to Alucard the instant I was back, that was my cysting decision.

Hmmm. Would I do that?

No. I wanted to be human. A vamp was a whole new level of decisions I wasn't quite ready for. My food would be people. That could conflict with my mission. Save humanity from the monsters. I would be a monster so I had to save them from myself. Oh cyst. I just came up with a whole new chicken and egg problem.

My head pounded with a normal ol' headache.

First, I needed home and rest.

"Home sweet home," I murmured, watching the land fly by underneath us.


	41. Found and Lost

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the reviews: DeathDragon130 and FuryanDemoness19

;-)

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We landed and within an hour, I was in line for Annabel, the earliest ferry across to England. I'd still need to travel all the way to London, but I would be far closer and without an ocean between me and my home.

Kate's phone rang. At least her's was a more recent model.

"Sister Kate," she glanced at me then said sweetly, "Father Anderson," I heard a shout that sounded like, "Put her on."

Kate flinched, "Put who on, Father Anderson?"

I could almost hear him grinding his teeth, before his indiscernible growl came through.

"Alright, but I agree with her path. The immortals are rising. We can't afford to be chasing her when the whole of humanity is at stake."

She handed me the phone, leaned in and whispered, "If I'm right, he's on our trail. End the call quickly and get on that ferry."

I nodded, inhaled and spoke, "Sister Alex."

There was silence, as if he hadn't expected me to say that, or it somehow brought to his little stubborn mind where I should have been.

"Alex," he sighed, equal parts relief and exasperation.

"What do you want, Anderson?"

"Alex, why canna ye call meh grandfather?"

"I just can't. That would acknowledge blood lineage and you could easily make yourself into my medical guardian. I make my own choices, and I expect others to have the decency to respect my decisions and only argue for a short while. You beat the horse to death and decay."

"What are ye talking about?"

I sighed. This is why I enjoyed sparring with Alucard. He caught on really dratted quickly. What if I never saw Alucard again, because Marvin, Ran or Anderson caught me and dragged me back? Everything slowed, as my eyes swept the line, and the area.

Kate may be on my side right now, but Marvin wasn't.

"What do you want Anderson?"

"Alex, please. Come back ta meh. Ah donna blame ye fer attacking Ran and fleeing. Brendan isna the nicest father, but he cares."

Fear and anger flashing through me, I snarled, "If you really think I attacked Bishop Ran, then I am not the Alex you want to associate with, Father Anderson."

"Alex!"

I hung up. As if I would randomly attack Ran. He hadn't offered me violence. Brendan, on the other hand had threaten my life, my future. He planned to steal what was rightfully mine. Or in the terms of men, what was rightfully Alucard's.

Was that all I was to Brendan, and Marvin? Property? Didn't they cysting know that women are equals now? Or in most cases better?

I would not sit idly by as my family was murdered. I would lash out with the fury of humanity. I would destroy my enemies. I would succeed where they failed.

Sister Kate's soft laughter drew my ire-filled gaze.

"I think that will make him pause and think. No one, not even Marvin talks back to him like that. To make him wonder."

"He needs to think more, act on those thoughts. Really. Me attack Ran? How dumb is that? I must have gotten my intelligence from grandma, along with my compassion."

"You got your temper from him," Kate laughed at my face, "I see you don't like that."

"Great. I have vatican temper. Lovely."

She hugged me, careful of my arm, "If only we had gotten you. You would have bettered us."

"Or I would be another pregnant woman, weakened by those who say they love her?"

"I doubt that. No matter the path, your strength would make you no one's puppet."

Lines of a song rang through my mind.

One life to live

One love to give

One chance to keep from falling

One heart to break

One soul to take us

Not forsake us

Only one

Only one.

I remember hearing it once on the radio. Alex Band, if I remembered correctly.

I had only one life to live. If I had only one love to give, it was to Alucard. I so hoped my heart didn't break. I had only one.

Yet, Anderson had broken my heart. The heart I gave to my family. To see them torn from me, by the very things he hunted. He had shattered my trust.

Don't let history repeat itself, please. I couldn't stand tall if all my trust was turned to dust and blown away.

"Here," Kate gave me my ticket, "I'd say he'll be here in half an hour. You should be long gone by then."

"Thank you, Sister Kate. Perhaps if Ran and Sir Integra come to an agreement, we will see each other again."

"If you decide to join the monsters, do it for the right reasons. Then no matter the barrier, your soul will be victorious."

"But in the eyes of the church, I would be damned."

"You protect people without faith. Your soul, your will is more pure than most of us," she paused looked down, "Saint Alex. Patron of disbelievers."

"Oh cyst," I scowled at her, "I am not becoming a saint. I am not joining those pitiful figures."

"I don't agree with Mother Teresa, but you could put us to rights," she smirked.

I shivered, "I will have to make a will saying not to make me a saint. Thanks a lot."

She broke from my side, waving me off, "Bye, Sister Alex. I'm going to keep record of your miracles."

I gaped after her, "Drat."

"Ticket, sister?"

I handed my ticket over, irritated by Kate's last words. Me, a saint? They were cysting loco. That was the equivalent of granting sainthood to Alucard. Ugh, creepy thought. Very creepy.

Alucard...would this count as laugh worthy or puzzlement? I certainly was insulted. They would use me to increase their religious idiocy. I did not take well to that plan.

I found a seat next to a window. I could see Kate. I waved. She smiled, returned it. I think she mouthed, "Go with God."

I smiled at that. All these fathers and sisters wishing me well. How did God take it? If he did exist wouldn't he strike me down followed by these people? He wasn't known for his kindness without his destruction. He flooded the world because it wasn't perfect. This world was a result. It wasn't perfect. Kinda lends itself to him being either nonexistent or imperfect himself. My hand rubbed over Sean's rosary. Yet, good men followed this god as a kind being.

It was that belief that helped Sean. Nothing would persuade me to strip that belief and faith from him. He was the way he was because of his decisions. I respected someone who chose their path, than blindly take it.

A shiver ran up my spine, making me look to Kate. Was there a vamp? She turned her head, maybe sensing it too?

Then Marvin was in her face, snarling.

Oh, cyst!

The ferry lurked into motion

Please, please don't look this way. I so didn't want to be at his mercy.

Anderson, appeared gently laying a hand on Marvin's shoulder as more people started paying attention to the scene. I'm all for bad PR of Marvin and his ilk, especially if I got away from him and Anderson.

"Alex?"

My eyes widened.

I saw Anderson down there, but I would swear he was right beside me.

"Alex, where are ye? Ah can hear ye."

Oh cyst! Telepathy.

His eyes rose to mine, locked.

This wasn't good.

"Alex, donna go back to them. Stay."

I sneered at him, shouting in my head, "If you think I would attack Ran to escape, there is nothing to speak about. Perhaps you should ask Father Brendan what he gained from betraying your family?"

Anderson's eyes widened, swung around to pin a spot to the side.

My eyes followed.

Brendan was grinning up at me.

His lips moved, "We will find you."

Oh cyst. He'd have Jacob waiting for me. I'd be a sitting duck to the vamp's next attack.

"Ah willna allow it, Alex."

"What can you do, Anderson? Get me to a nunnery? I am not Ophelia!"

Confusion colored his tone, "Who is Ophelia?"

Oh, this was just lovely. This was the other side effect of complete devotion to only one book. They didn't know of Shakespeare, nor any other influential poet, writer or composer. Such a limited selection of the arts that humanity had wrought.

I needed to meet Hellsing on the other end or I was dead meat.

Jacob would turn me and if it didn't destroy me, I would be his puppet. Terror latched unto me, reminding me of the vamps snarling at me as I hid when I was younger.

I was powerless.

"Sean would na have allowed ye out of his sight without a protection, Alex."

I looked back to Anderson, saw his eyes, furious on me.

"Like you left me two stupid books?"

"Ye have meh blessed bible. It has seen a many a battle. Ye will make it inta a barrier. Sean gave ye something else. Ah know he did. Survive and ah will find ye."

"I can't trust your word anymore, Anderson. The only ones who can protect me now are me and Hellsing."

Anderson turned, stiffened.

I looked as the ferry swung about.

Brendan was gone.

And so was the telepathy.

I pulled out the bible, clutched it.

This and Sean's rosary were my only protections. I was so screwed once I reached England. I sure hoped I survived long enough to hear Alucard's snarky comment on this.


	42. Docking and Death

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Sorry for the long delay on this update. Between a camping trip and several hard work projects it has been slow on typing up chapters. Please enjoy.

Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the reviews: Jokerisdabest and SHARPIE addict.

I'm glad people are enjoying the story!

;-)

'========-========'

My skin itched as I got closer to England.

My knuckles were white on the bible.

I was human. I felt fear.

Did monsters fear? Did they have terrors of their own?

Death. Brendan would have Jacob waiting. To take me down.

No one with a brain would let this opportunity slide away.

When the shoreline of England appeared, grew larger, my anxiety spiked with it.

What manner of attack awaited me? How many of the people around me would be sacrificed? I couldn't keep them all safe. How many would die because I wasn't at full bore right now?

When the ferry docked, I nearly jumped at the jerk.

"Welcome to England. Please disembark safely. Enjoy your day."

I stood, clutching my bag, my book, and my composure. I didn't want to key in anyone that I was on DefCon 5, ready for bad things.

Nothing attacked as the line exited the boat, streaming across to the station.

It only made me feel as if the bullseye on my back was expanding.

The eye of the storm? Or was this the leading edge?

My foot stepped unto land when the first scream pierced the air.

I looked up.

Three figures descended into the crowd, grinning, crimson eyed, barring fangs.

Blood sprayed, bodies more slowly following.

Death had come for me.

People were running for cover, trying to hide from it.

"I'm sorry Integra. I can't sit by."

Hoping that this worked, I focused on the bible, turned it into a shield, threw it outward.

I felt dizzy, momentarily disorientated. Then the world righted, I could see clearly.

Silence had descended.

I looked above the carnage left behind.

The three vamps were hovering in the air, looking furious.

Pages fluttered just beneath them.

"God has saved us!"

I ignored the cries, eyes on the vamps.

"This wasn't in the contract," the center one snarled.

"Damn Vatican agent. Jacob forgot to mention that," rightmost snapped.

Left shouted, "Cowardly nun. Come up and fight us."

People were crowding around me, pleading but I focused on the vamps. They would destroy me.

An explosion sounded, followed by two of the vamps getting blown to bits.

That...was it? It couldn't be Seras' gun.

Seras landed on the roof, aimed her cannon, fired.

The third one dodged, snarling, "Alucard's pet."

Laughter rang out, "I don't need a pet, scum."

He appeared behind the vampire and slashed. The third vamp howled before he dusted.

"God has sent an angel," someone grabbed me, making me stumble.

I grabbed the rail, my concentration broken.

Pages flashed back together into the bible to heavily land at my feet.

"Please Angel. Grant us God's protection."

I blinked at all the people jostling around me.

Oh cyst. I flashed upon this scene from Life of Brian by Monty Python, where Brain is telling them he isn't the messiah.

"You each are responsible for your own protection and prayers. I am not an angel," I softly said.

"So humble. She must be an angel."

"Everyone, if you would please come this way, we need to see to the wounded."

I saw men and women in military garb, lead by...well, well, well. Robert.

He personally came up to me, "Sister, if you would follow me."

I nodded, breaking free of the clinging crowd. Please don't make my actions here promote the hysteria called blind faith. Think for yourselves, not on what you see. Seeing isn't always believing. You needed to temper sight with knowledge.

He lead me to a small tent set up to the side.

A hand reached out grabbed me, lifted.

I was staring into Alucard's cold insane eyes.

"I will talk to this one, alone, General."

Robert shrugged, "Don't tear her to pieces. We may need her to exchange for Alex."

Alucard merely smirked at that. As if he planned to kill me.

Did I look that different that both of them didn't recognize me?

Then I was flying.

I let out a very girly, "Yie!" as the ground fell away.

Alucard laughed, "This is the least of your worries, Nun."

I didn't like his tone one bit, but a nasty thought came to me.

He loved playing games with me. How would he feel if I played him?

"If ye think ah will die so easily monster, ye have ta work harder."

Wow. I sounded so like Anderson.

Alucard dropped me.

I barely had time to realize what he done when I hit ground, stumbled back then fell to my rump.

He gracefully glided down to the roof, standing next to a rooftop machine, "Really? Perhaps I will have you screaming for Anderson to save you."

"Ah donna need saving," I stood, clutching my bag and book, "Perhaps ye are in need of a savior."

"I am not those sheep who see one girl saving them as a descended angel. You are nothing."

He started stalking me.

I backed up, warily watching him, "Ah told them. God's protection falls ta each of us ta make."

He paused a split second before my back ran hard against a surface. No where to go.

He towered over me, grinning, "Pity Anderson decided to take what was mine. I will have to take what belongs to his God."

His hands slammed next to my shoulders, making me jerk.

"Na a soul in this would can take what is God's ta keep."

He leaned in, "What are you going to do, Nun? I am the more powerful one here. Where is your God?"

It was so his fault that I decided to make a fool of him, "Ye think ah am cornered with na a way out?"

His lips hovered over mine, "A nun, sworn to celibacy. I so enjoy defiling your kind while you scream for God. God didn't help centuries ago, he won't help you now."

Note to self, mention this to Integra as a bad thing to be letting Alucard do.

It was okay as it was me, but a nun certainly didn't deserve this type of harassment.

"Ye donna hold the advantage, monster."

"Then what will you do, Nun of Iscariot? Fight me? Run? Faint?"

The derisive tone in the last really irked me. Not all women have problems with fainting spells. Plus, the whole reason it was now "commonplace" was due to too tight corsets. I wore one once. I nearly fainted from trying to just walk.

"Those arena the only options, monster."

"Show me. Hurry, prove to me you are different."

I grabbed his nape pulled him into a kiss.

He stiffened, eyes empty as I glared at him.

He jerked back, eyes narrowed, "Alex?"

I grinned, doing my best not to have an accent, "So you can't tell its me from looking, Fang Boy?"

I had the lilt still, but that was better than sounding like Anderson.

His hand spanned my throat, and I think he might have throttled me if Seras hadn't spoken up, "Master?"

Alucard straightened stepped back, "Well played, Judas Girl."

Seras came into view. She glanced at me, away then did a double take.

"Alex?"

I smiled, "Good ta see ye too, Seras."

I managed not to blush, but I could see the snarky smirk on Alucard's face.

"Na..not a word, Alucard. Ah've had meh fill of overbearing males this evening."

I sure hope this wore off by the time I got back to the mansion. I so didn't want Integra hearing me like this.

Alucard would poke at me when he felt like it.

I was suddenly hugged tightly. I tried to gasp in breath. Was that my ribs creaking?

"I'm so happy you are back, safe and sound."

"Na so much breathing," I rasped.

She let go just as quickly, "Sorry."

I gulped air, "Reminder, don't let a vamp hug meh."

She paused, looked between my shoulders, "That didn't feel right."

She gripped my regrowing arm. Then she squealed in delight.

"You're healing. You'll be whole again."

"Downside, limited powers for like twenty hours," I grumbled.

Alucard spoke, "No powers?"

"In order to heal, one of the nuns shot meh..me up with a telekinesis blocker. It also dampens meh...my empathy. I think those three goons were sent by Jacob to get me while I'm not so hot."

Seras reached out and touched my forehead, "You are running a fever."

"Like ah need anything else to take me down," I muttered.

Seras took my hat, "Let's get you to the medic tent. The guys will be so happy to see you."

"Have to get by the military man down there. He's going to recognize the clothes. Not many nuns running around," I pointed out.

"That is easy, Judas Girl."

His shadows covered me.

I froze. Please don't make me be nude. That could be a very nasty practical joke.

Then I was in a tank top and one of my kilts.

"Snazzy," I looked at Alucard, "Much better than the nun outfit"

"This will only work for a short time, Judas Girl," he picked me up then walked towards the edge of the roof, "Come along, Police Girl."

"She's running a fever. That isn't enough clothing."

Alucard stepped off the edge and plummeted.

I freaked, clutching him. Being without powers sucked.

"You...you found her."

I opened my eyes. Rob was staring at me.

Then his eyes searched, "Where's the nun?"

"She decided to trade her life for Alex's," Alucard walked by him towards a tent with the medical symbol.

Gary parted the flaps then gave a yell, "Alex!"

Lovely. I was going to be prodded and poked for a while.

"Set her down. Bandages, antibiotic cream now."

I didn't recognize the "nurse" but he complied with Gary's demands, as Alucard slipped inside and set me down on a cot.

Gary looked at my arm frowning, "It's growing back."

"An astute observation," I said dryly.

He rubbed the skin, "I would love to know how they did it. Keep our soldiers from dying."

That saddened me. This ability could help others but I didn't know enough to reproduce it. That was on the assumption that the "Test" wasn't needed for most people. I lived. How many others with this same ability were dead because of that liquid destruction? How many more would die for this if more found out how to copy it?

I was driving myself crazy with all this.

"Well, I don't know about that but I stole the bag that they were feeding me intravenously. It might have helped speed up my recovery," I pulled open my bag, spilling the contents over the cot, fishing the bag out.

Gary gave a choked sound, "Is that...are those priest clothes?"

"They had me in a hospital gown. I don't run around in something so skimpy normally so I alleviated the Vatican of some clothing on my way out."

Gary pursed his lips. Oh lovely. Was he one of those who thought doing anything against Christianity was a sin? I stole to get back to Hellsing without drawing too much attention.

His lips quirked, "You tried the priests clothing first didn't you?"

I smiled, "Nope. My figure would have so shown in that."

The edge of the kilt began to unravel, trailing wisps of smoke around my knees.

Cyst.

Gary grabbed the clothes, then pulled me to me feet and around a curtain, "You did that on purpose, Alucard."

Alucard's soft laughter proved he thought it was amusing. Gary ducked back around the curtain, leaving me alone. Stupid vampire.

I dressed in a pair of slacks first, then pulled on the dress shirt, mentally cursing at Alucard. You'd think he'd be one of those men who thought that if I was nude, more of the men would be pursuing me. Stupid cyst.

"Alex was recovered from Iscariot?"

Sir Integra's voice!

Happiness rose. I was going home.

I felt the tank vanish and my breasts unfortunately pressed against the shirt in a very unseemly way. I was so right. I would have given away that I wasn't a guy if I had worn the priest clothing.

Drat.

I stepped around the curtain, "I would have thought a short time meant more than a few minutes, Alucard," I scowled at him.


	43. Fever and Daylight

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Sorry for the long delay on this update. This chapter decided to need extra care to work and I needed to bang my head against its rocky surface to smooth it out.

Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the reviews: Rockmoss, FuryanDemoness19 and Hinataluv

I'm glad people are enjoying the story!

;-)

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Sir Integra smiled, when I set my gaze on her.

I was in black slacks and a pristine white button down shirt. She was in her normal pantsuit. We made a pair.

"The Vatican took your clothing?"

"Yes, sir. I reciprocated in kind."

She held her unlit cigar, smirking. I sure hoped she was as amused as she appeared to be.

"You can't tell my emotions can you, Alex?"

"It goes in and out. A very severe side-effect of the rapid healing drug Sister Kate used on me before I could counter her."

"Hmph," she scowled, "You let yourself be taken by Anderson?"

I reined in the sudden angry explosion in my heart from escaping into my tone nor voice, "I don't know if I would have successfully escaped Anderson before he took me to Ireland as Sister Kate darted me while I was fighting him and Hienkel, Sir Integra. I do apologize for the inconvenience."

She considered me, "Anderson and Hienkel. How did Sister Kate manage to take you down?"

"I wasn't sensing emotions very well while fighting my two opponents. A female with a British accent and manner of speaking shot Anderson in the head. I incorrectly assumed she was on my side."

"She convinced you through action that she was on your side to immediately turn around and dart you. Typical tactic."

I winced. Lovely. I fell for a common, maybe read oldest, trick in the book. I so needed a copy. Plus time to read it, and rest...I just needed rest. I felt totally exhausted.

I swayed, very suddenly all my energy depleted. Drat it. What now?

Gary took my elbow, "You have rings under your eyes big enough to hide flats in, Alex. How long have you been on your feet?"

I tried to add it up in my head, "Two days at most? Time didn't mean much. I went from threat to threat pretty much all the way home."

Gary sat me down on a cot, "Sir Integra, we need to get her somewhere secure. With her injuries and this level of limb regeneration, she must be pass her limit and used up all her reserves."

I felt bone aches all over, as if the pain was morphing into gnawing beasts inside my marrow. I better not mention that image to Alucard. He'd torture me with it.

"How soon will Anderson arrive after you?"

"Please excuse my impertinence, Sir Integra, but the bigger enemy is Jacob and his Vatican counterpart Brendan."

"Our vampire enemy is working with the Vatican?" she sounded offended.

"Brendan was going to hand me over to Jacob for some unfathomable reason. That is why I couldn't wait until I was healed to return. It also cut down on the information I got," my vision wavered, "I," my eyes rolled back and I felt myself go limp.

Gary's voice chased me down, "She's running a fever. Goddamn it."

I came to, shivering badly, a vicious headache pulsing behind the bridge of my nose.

Arms held me against a warm body which was maybe the only reason the shivering wasn't full on shudders.

My eyes opened to Integra barking into a phone, "I want to know the instant you have that information."

She hung up, looked at me, "Are you sensible, Alex?"

"Maybe. Was I not after I lost consciousness, Sir Integra?" my mouth felt like fine grated powder. Ick.

"Something about Brendan being a mortal demon and Anderson acting like a grandfather," she puffed out a large cloud of smoke, then her angry expression softening into humor, "And a request for your mother."

I felt my already heated cheeks burning hotter, "Lovely."

A grey blanket wrapped me tightly. I didn't want to try to see if I had any strength to pull free of it, nor to move. I had never felt this ill before. I sure hoped it passed quickly. Plus my neck felt like jello. I so didn't want to try to move and end up in a worse position.

"Can you continue your debriefing?"

"I can try," I swallowed, "Sister Kate had darted me and I woke later in a hospital room with religious decor. It was daylight going towards dusk. I was left alone for a long while."

"Guards?"

"None. A couple children ran by my room even. I think they assumed I'd be out for a long time. It was odd. I had enemies, so there should have been someone. I must have been low priority in their hospital along with the teens being unsupervised. They really need to stop the abstinence only program."

"Did they leave you for a day?" she was thinking.

"No. When it became dark, Anderson showed up."

"Did they interrogate you?"

"No, I started ranting at him. I kept on him why he nabbed me."

She looked interested, "What did you rant about?"

"He shouldn't care about me as I was a heathen. That I was safer where I am appreciated. That if more tests were administered I would cease to be," I giggled before I could control it, "...shuffle off this mortal coil."

"Gary did say you'd be out of it for a few hours," she sighed, picking up her phone, dialing,"Michael, please continue your next assignment with Seras. Alex will return to the manor with the remainder of our forces."

He must have said something at length, before she replied, "If Anderson does attempt it again, we'll see if he likes our new welcome," she considered me, "Continue Alex."

She sounded as if she would be revisiting this with me later.

"Anderson decided my arguments weren't worth countering so he fell asleep. I called him a bad word," I tried to find it but shrugged, "Another joined us. I thought he was one of the teens running around. He looked like a jock."

"Jock?"

"Athlete, girl magnet."

"Who was he?"

"A bishop. I thought all of them were old men...sicko old men."

"A young bishop? Bishop Randall?" she sat forward, her cigar forgotten.

"He prefers Ran. He looks like a young punk rocker wannabe. He's a telepath."

She froze as the arms around me squeezed. The pain throbbed through my chest, clearing some of my cobwebby thoughts, "Ow!"

"Bishop Randall is a telepath?" Integra asked, flicking a glare at who held me.

"I thought he was a sociopath or Jacob's puppet. I couldn't read him. Turns out he couldn't read me. Had the same thought on me. Apparently, Anderson thought this a good thing."

"How so?"

"Ran said whatever Anderson was thinking wouldn't work. Best guess Anderson was thinking Ran was a suitable husband," I felt my lip curl, "I'd think Ran would run for his life."

Integra smirked, "Highly doubtful a young boy standing up to you for long. So Anderson woke up in the middle of your introduction to Bishop Ran?"

"Yes. When Ran offered to send word to my family," I smiled, "Might have worked if Anderson hadn't been right there."

She sat back, "You have had a busy couple days."

"This was only the beginning of the journey, Sir Integra," I pulled the blanket closer, the shivers slowly easing, "Feels like a week's worth of troubles."

"What happened after that revelation?" she looked like she was already formulating plans.

"Ran pointed out I had other concerns than Anderson's matchmaking. The regeneration of my arm in particular, Sir Integra. Then we were joined by a third member of the Vatican."

Integra was frowning, but gave no reply.

"Father Brendan, the murderer who I connected with before the first vamp attack upon my family joined Anderson and Ran."

"What?" Integra refocused on me, surprised.

"I was equally...unsettled," a hand cupped my face.

A familiar gloved hand. My eyes rose to Alucard's. His eyes were slits, and he seemed...less than lively. Where was his usual bluster? I know mine was totally behind the full recovery I needed.

I looked beyond his shoulder to the window.

Bright sunlight flashed on other cars outside. We weren't moving.

"Traffic jam?" I asked before I censored myself.

Integra laughed, "The nun of the Annabel is becoming a very famous religious figure."

"Cyst! I so didn't intend this," I frowned as our car moved maybe three car lengths before stopping again, "Why are they so needy for religious symbols?"

"Because they are not as strong as we are. We do not seek symbols when our morale needs rousing. We don't need touchstones of the supernatural as we deal with it everyday," she exhaled slowly, "We become the symbols they look to. I do believe that we'll need to keep you out of nun clothing for a few months, to be on the safe side."

I was so hating Sister Kate now. Just cysting lovely. I had fulfilled her comment. Saint Alex. I scowled out the window, "I don't like the female outfit. No pockets and in severe black. I prefer more flexible options."

"Back to your point, the murderer from your past had returned. Why was he there?"

"He claimed he was sent by Marvin to see after me while Anderson was to report in. I tried to manipulate Anderson in to not leaving me with Brendan, but in the end he left."

"What did you use? Perhaps we need to improve your method as you seem to be often in enemy hands."

"That he was going for the glory and leaving me alone yet again to my enemies. I implied I meant Brendan but his thick skull obviously deflected it. I...yeah," I looked up at Alucard, "Are you the basis for Bram Stoker's Drac?"

Integra spoke sternly, "Alex, how did you get to that question?"

I focused in her, "I said Van Helsing had destroyed the monster better than him with old age slowing him. He gave me the books," I looked around, "Where are they? I wanted to read the Drac one."

Integra uncovered a pile beside her and held up one of them, "These?"

"Yeah," I reached out to take it but Alucard took my wrist and rewrapped me in my blanket, "Hey, I want the book."

"Why did Father Anderson give you Stoker's Dracula and what appears to be a blessed Irish bible?" Integra set the book down beside her and recovered it.

"He said one was to make me realize the danger I was in from a monster, the other to comfort me," I grinned, "I think the bible is going to be the monster story and the Drac will be fun...I never did read it back in class. Would be better than Dickinson. Red hat."

"Alex, Anderson gave you the books. What happened then?"

"The bastard left. Then Ran talked to Brendan and Brendan knocked him out. He was nasty. Evil."

"Alex, back on topic this instant."

I pressed back into the seat, alarmed by her tone. What was I doing wrong?

"Did Brendan attack you?"

"He struck me. The cheek. I was being cheeky with him," I winced at her glower, "He said he was going to make me a vamp. I...I think I said something about women being subjugated was the only way he could get it up."

"How was he going to turn you? He wasn't a vampire was he?"

"No, he's working with Jacob. Jacob was controlling the vamps at the airport. Jacob wasn't suppose to start eating until he had me in his sights. He tipped you off before I was off my plane."

She sat forward, "You were the intended target at the airport?"

"What's one missing American?" I blinked back tears, "I fell for their trap. They moved me like a pawn."

"The pieces fall," she looked pleased, "Make you move to England where your priest protector could not follow, leave devastation to distract us from your predicament. Clever. Then Jacob either failed controlling the vampires or he, as you Americans say, jumped the gun. We were on hand when you got to our country, spoiling their plans. You ended up in our hands instead. He had to get you out to continue."

"Why me? Brendan was guarding my family when I was young."

"What?" she looked shocked, "Father Brendan was guarding you in your early years?"

"Yeah, Anderson was saying he had only one chance to redeem himself for failing then. His...I...he faltered and that was why the vamps got us that first time."

"Alucard?"

"Seems very odd to let one who failed so badly near someone they think is precious."

"Why me?" my eyes slid shut, "What decisions lead to me being their Eve?"

"Alex, Eve of what?"

"Something...better than...Nazi copies?"

"Alucard, how could Alex be an Eve to a new vampiric threat? Her powers alone could not account for it."

"In this condition, she can't do anything. She is as skeletal as I was when you found me, my master. She'd make a poor draculina right now."


	44. Awakening into the Eye

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Sorry for the long delay on this update. This time work intervened. I am hoping I can finish this story before another few months go by.

Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the reviews: Rockmoss, BloodSinned, Onyx-Muffin, electro moonlight, Kiriari, and blueminx87

I'm glad people are enjoying the story!

;-)

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Beep. Beep.

I tried to reach out and turn off the alarm. No work today. It could wait for later.

My arm stopped barely after it started over. Fear made me sit up, only to flop back down weakly. Aches pulsed all over me now that I was awake.

I recognized the ceiling. Totally dungeon.

I raised my arm slightly to look at it. Lovely. I looked like one of those famine victims. No wonder I was so weak and sick. I looked up to an IV drip. Two bags, one looked to be a painkiller and the other was an intravenous nutrient feed.

The beeping was a heart monitor next to my head.

I tried sensing emotions but either I was too weak still or Kate's drug was still messing up my system.

My mouth was dry. I looked above to see if there was a glass I could reach. Nope. Nothing. Nothing between my feet on my desk. Just my computer. If it had been a liquid and reachable, I'd have chugged it. Brings a whole new meaning to liquid display.

"Hello?" I rasped, "May I get some water?"

I looked around but there was no one in sight. Drat. Wasn't it a constitutional right to have a nurse? Wait, England. Hmmm. Was there a right to medical assistant while I recovered? I'd research it later.

The door opened. William stepped in with a tray.

"My savior," I rasped with a smile, "Though where's the beard?"

"Miss Jones-Jordan," William chided, "You should still be sleeping."

"The beeping woke me. Thought it was an alarm clock."

"I will see if we can have it set to a silent mode for you," he set the tray down, "You certainly are giving me new ideas on food preparation."

"Oh? How did I manage that?"

"Gary is concerned that your...emancipated state will entitle a sensitive stomach."

"Oh," I blinked up at him, "Do I look as bad as I feel?"

"I do not know how you feel, but you look as weary as any normal soldier of Hellsing after a prolonged battle. You will need to rest until your body weight has returned to normal," he set a bed table over me, set the tray on it, "Do you feel well enough to eat?"

I slowly sat up, shivering. My unbound arm shook horribly as I lifted it toward the tray. Pain preceded my arm dropping to my stomach.

Embarrassment flushed my skin, "Cyst."

"It is alright, Miss Jones-Jordan," William uncovered the tray, "At least you are awake and can consume your meal," he sat on the edge of the bed, "If I may be so bold as to assist you."

"Please, even though I hate it."

He fed me as if I was a baby. I detested it. This was worse than the dratted stretcher. I wasn't going to complain about that one again. I wondered if I complained about this one, a worse weakness would be visiting me shortly. It would be highly ironic.

"I'll send Gary to set the machine to silent mode. Is there anything else, Miss Jones-Jordan?"

"Just a sign," I sighed.

"Oh?"

"No monsters, religious nuts nor political games. Come back in fifty years."

I yawned, too tired to lift my hand to my mouth.

"Get some rest. You have a long recovery ahead of you."

"A road stretches beneath my feet with no end in sight, meeting brigands and thieves best suited to night," I yawned again, my eyes staying closed, "Who shall we meet next?"

Dreams curved around me, taunting me with my father and mother hugging me, saying I'd be alright. My older brother wrestling around on the floor with a friend, laughing. Anderson sitting in a chair too small for his frame, looking over my homework with a soft smile as he bounced my baby brother.

For a moment I wished I was that young girl again. Ignorant of vamps and murderers. A simple life, filled with laughter and love. How could I move ahead when the happiest moments were behind me?

"Then you wouldn't be accepted for who you are," Alucard's voice woke me.

I stared at him, confused, "What?"

He was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking as a king would on a throne, than a simple bed with a ragged human child. That was so pathetic. I wasn't a sniveling human baby. I was old enough to drink, vote and die. Preferably, not at the same time.

"Our master has made you the weapon from flesh."

"You mean like V in V for Vendetta, that the idea is stronger than any flesh and blood person?"

"V for Vendetta?"

"Its a movie about Britain and how there's a police state where the leader is suppressing the people with fear. V is a masked hero if you will, trying to bring back the government where it was answerable to its people. He quotes Guy Fawkes and has some awesome lines. He gets shot by ten Uzis but remains standing. He says something along the lines 'Under this mask is not a man of flesh and blood. It is an idea and ideas are bullet-proof.' " I looked at Alucard, "In a way you are also like that."

"Oh?"

"No matter how many times you are shot, cut, burned you come back. You are a stronger version of V."

"So I'm an idea?" he leaned into my face.

"I said in a way. In the movie V's physical body died and another took up the action to start a new age. You don't die."

"But in a way I am this V. Untouchable?" he kissed me, "intangible?"

He vanished into shadows, leaving me with a racing heart.

"I hate when he does that," I scowled before raising my voice, "And that tie is still mine!"

Mel's voice cut in, "Tie?"

"Long story. You all okay?" I looked at him standing in the doorway.

"Tonight is hard. Karaoke night was Sonny's idea and the rest are not into it now."

I frowned, "Just because it was his idea doesn't mean it stays his."

Mel grinned, "My thought exactly. So, as you are bed ridden, how about a song?"

"You going to sing me to sleep?" I asked with a smile.

"Maybe," he sat in my chair, "You know, you have steel balls."

"I have no use for balls where I fight."

"You escaped the Vatican, attack vampires while you are practically a skeleton, and to top it all off you still manage to smile at the end. That takes balls, no matter the gender. It's a pity you have to have only a mediocre singing voice."

I grabbed the pillow and flung it at him. He playfully caught it as it nearly hit his knees. Drat it, that should have socked him in the face. I was so losing my edge.

"At least you don't whisper the song. Seras turns bright red and her voice is inaudible."

"Maybe if you guys didn't tease her so."

"Nah, no fun."

He was yanked out of his chair to face a really bruised Seras.

He blinked, "Ah, just kidding."

"The teams are rotating out," she set him on the floor, releasing him, "Alucard needs you."

"Take it easy, 'kay," Mel patted her shoulder, "You looked rough. Better pretty up those faces or Alucard is going to take you both to the Thames and dump you."

Seras didn't reply, merely sat down, leaned her head back and seemed to go to sleep.

"Go on Mel. I have my watch tigress," I joked, noting Seras' bruises looks like stripes running from her chin up to her forehead, "Good hunting and watch your backs."

"What, no watching our asses?" Mel grinned unrepentantly.

I pointed, "Hup to solider. Your commander awaits!"

He saluted, then sauntered out.

"I take it, Alucard was needed for the next big nasty?"

She gave no response, her body laying there, oddly. Seras had to be exhausted not to want a more comfortable position.

I sat back, considering her. The bruising was really odd. I couldn't recall ever seeing bruises on her nor Alucard. It looked like someone tried to cut her with multiple blades just missing her eyes, or that they tried to push her head through a wire panel.

"Seras, do you need to have dinner? I can call William," I offered.

"No, I just need sleep," she groused.

It didn't sound like her. Then again she had been stressed most likely. Working a lot because of Jacob and his allies.

Before I could offer a better location for her, the door opened.


	45. Tempest's Edge

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Trying to work around...well work. Unfortunately I need to work to get money to get stuff to live. Now all I need is a robot to deal with the house chores. ;)

Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the reviews: Onyx-Muffin, Gluedinthesaddle, and Tobi-013

I'm glad people are enjoying the story!

;-)

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William walked in carrying a bucket with Seras' meal.

He set the bucket with it's crimson cargo on the desk, "Sir Integra has ordered your blood intake tripled, Miss Victoria."

Seras nodded, took the first packet then bit in, her shoulders falling forward as if she'd protect it from another vamp.

She never had done that before. It was as if she had...

William made the thought dissolve away, "Sir Integra will need the report within the hour."

Seras nodded, still so subdued, "Alex, may I use your computer?"

"Sure, go ahead," I looked at William, raised an eyebrow in question.

"I will bring down the remaining half of your meal, Miss Victoria. I will also bring your meal as well, Miss Jones-Jordan."

He swept me a bow which made me smile, before he departed, silently shutting the door. How did he make it look so elegant? Did he practice that in Butler school? Was there a Butler school?

Seras took another bag from the bucket, bit into it before rising to stiffly move towards the desk.

The motion looked so painful that I could feel her aching joints.

"Seras, is everything alright? You seem out of sorts."

"I am fine," she said in an odd tone, like she didn't want to take about it.

She started typing, slowly at first then more rapidly, as if she felt more energy. Maybe she was acting off because she was starving. Which reminded me that I was very hungry myself. Dratted hospital food was throwing off my game, and preventing me from playing my game. Lovely. Too many enemies, not enough time to deal with them.

Brendan, working to make me a monster, a new monster. Jacob, back from the grave. I really needed to make his home permanently six feet under. Marvin the Martian trying to enslave or kill me. Unknown vamps who wanted to kill me for wearing Alucard's ring. Possible enemies within the British government as I hadn't exactly called Robert back. Numerous Vatican agents wanted to hunt me down for being a Hellsing or a heathen depending on the day. I didn't need the persecution.

The door opened and William came in, "Miss Jones-Jordan, in deference for your emancipated condition, I have brought a light stew, tea and mixed fruit."

I managed to push myself to sitting, eager for any food. What he offered was delicious looking when he set the tray over my lap.

"I'll bring down more shortly," he left us to our meals.

Seras finished her fourth bag when she stopped typing, looking like she was reading what she had wrote.

"Was the mission that bad?"

I figured that since she now had some food she'd be in a more talkative mood.

She looked at me, those odd lacerations on her face still raw and red, eyes searching mine as if wondering what to say.

"I rather not talk about it, Alexandra," she said before looking back at her report.

She never called me by my full first name. It must have been a terrible mission. No bouncing Seras. Maybe I could get her to watch a movie with me to get back her spirits. Police Academy? That should be good for some laughs.

She printed out her report, frowning over it, as if it offended her. Or lacked something vital.

Before I could ask what was wrong, William came back in with another bucket of blood, and another tray of food for me.

"Is that your report, Miss Victoria?"

She flinched, but held it out to him, "Yes, Walter."

I looked at her in serious concern.

William frowned, "I am not that traitor, Miss Victoria."

She flushed as if she was deeply embarrassed, "I'm sorry, William."

He seemed mollified by that before he took the empty trays away.

"Seras, do you need to have Gary take a look at you? You seem more..."

"This is the way things are! No one can change it, not God, the devil or you!" she snapped angrily, her eyes glowing crimson with bloodlust.

That cut deeply. She had seemed so human, yet now she was the monster. Had one mission stripped her of her remaining threads of humanity?

Wait, that sounded awfully like, "That's something Alucard said to you, wasn't it?"

She blinked taken aback, "How did you know?"

"Seras, I am getting the feeling there is more to that quote than what you said, and the context he said it in."

She slumped in the chair, leaned forward and laid her face on the desk, "I don't understand."

"That makes two of us, Seras."

She looked up, opened her mouth, and William came back in.

He took the empties, left yet another round for us girls before leaving.

Seras swallowed a mouthful of her blood, "We went down to South America. Our enemy knew it and sent in their human allies. Master...butchered the first squad. I...I said it wasn't right. That they were humans. He dismissed it as if they were nothing. I raised my voice as it wasn't right for us to kill humans just because we were what we are."

Boy, I could imagine how well Alucard took that, "He told you off?"

"He said 'I don't care what these things are. They came here to try and kill us. It no longer matters what they are. Now they must die. They'll be slaughtered, corpses, left to rot in their graves like filth. This is just the way it is. This is what has to be done. And no one has the power to change that. Not God, the Devil, or you.' I didn't want to believe it."

"Balance."

"What?"

I inhaled and slowly started as my thoughts tried to order themselves, "Being a vamp is not just about butchering every human you come across. Yet it is not being so passive that you don't defend yourself against those that blindly obey orders. I think in that way I would make a terrible vamp."

She looked so shocked she stuttered, "You'd make a better one than me."

I smiled sadly as the truth sank into my heart, "Seras, I value human life above my own. I would be too firmly on the passive side. I wouldn't balance with the urges that come with being a vamp. I wouldn't feed from a human. Their life is precious, more so for it's brevity. So quickly snuffed out with a harsh breath."

I would be terrible at being a vamp, more so than Seras. I'd get myself and most likely others killed. How so terribly lonely it was realizing I couldn't be with Alucard. Ever. For being me. Cyst it. Why did I have to be so...realistic? Maybe too many blows to my head and body? Note to self, avoid further physical confrontations. I didn't need more realism.

"But you aren't a monster!"

"Seras, I think that is Alucard's point from that speech to you. He doesn't want you to give in. To die. Only humans have that luxury. You are a vamp. You drink the blood of your enemies. You strike fear into the hearts of other vamps. You are not scum. You are better than that. You are a monster. Your humanity is holding you back from being who you are."

"That's not true. You can kill a human just as easily as me. You still respect life. You..."

"Seras," it jabbed me in the heart, "I am human. I may have more powers, but I am human. I will err. I will bleed. I will die. All I have is to leave behind a small memory of being a good person and doing the right thing in this lifetime I have, no matter how short my enemies cut it. You are a vamp. You will destroy your enemies long after their descendants have perished."

Tears ran down her face, "I really wanted you to become Master's new draculina."

The tone of it made me look at her. Defeat. With Integra they shouldn't feel defeat.

Then her eyes. I froze as her eyes filled with someone else. Someone who shouldn't be in control of her.

"You are hard to get at, pretty," her face grinned, the welts spilling new blood, right before blackness claimed me.


	46. Mortal Monsters

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Trying to work around...well work. Unfortunately I need to work to get money to get stuff to live. Now all I need is a robot to deal with the house chores. ;)

Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the reviews: Onyx-Muffin, CarmenD, and VampireSiren

I'm glad people are enjoying the story!

;-)

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There was this cartoon I use to watch. There's this hulking, dumb, blue superhero who's nigh invulnerable and super strong. His sidekick is a moth man who is smart and could fly but otherwise puny. I always laughed when the sidekick begged villains with, "Not in the face!"

I wasn't laughing now.

Pain radiated from my cheek up to my temple then to the back of my head, leaving me feeling nauseous and weak on top of ugly black waves flowing over my closed eyelids.

It was so funny when the moth sidekick was knocked down and pleading but right now I so wasn't amused. On top of that I didn't know if I'd get out of this alive.

Oh cyst. In a sick way I was the moth man and Alucard was the superhero. Minus the dumb and blue. To be honest I couldn't fly without being kicked by a vamp.

It wasn't a villain who had punched me either.

Seras. Seras had done this to me.

Betrayal sunk claws into my stomach, twisting viciously as I recalled the split second before the blow.

No, not Seras. It had been Jacob. Jacob the fucking asshole of mind rapers. If I managed to get up, I was hunting him down and personally putting him six feet under. No, that wasn't good enough. He tortured poor Janice. He had tortured and hurt me. Broke my heart once upon a time. He'd eaten countless humans since he'd become a vamp. He deserved a slow lingering death. Without the chance to escape, bemoan or monologue his end.

Painful death for each of those people he had silenced. For each person he had taken from the world. Each good deed those people would have brought to the whole human collective.

A breeze suddenly rushed over me and, with horror, I realized I was nude.

"She's not such a prize to look at right now," Brendan's voice instantly made me freeze.

"My pretty," the voice was identical to the ones in my dreams and memories from the institution.

Cold sweat covered my skin. Oh cysting fuck. What could I do? I was at their mercy. No powers, nude, weak, in pain.

My life was so over. They won. Game over, game over man. If there had been a benevolent god, I wouldn't be in this position. Of course I never would have met Alucard either.

"When can I bite her?" Jacob growled, "She should have been mine hours ago."

What? Drat. Why had they waited? Did I have a moment? What could I do in a moment? Spit at them?

I tried to move and only felt metal under my fingers. Not good enough.

Anger was bubbling under the fear and dread, heating my body. I couldn't, no I wouldn't go out like this. I was going to beat the shit out of Jacob and Brendan. It didn't matter I was naked and had nothing to fight with. I would not let them take my only life away.

"I did not foresee she would come into contact with Sister Kate. Her drugs have retarded the reproductive system while they sped Alex's recuperative powers. We can't turn Alex until her systems are operating normally. Based on Alex's arm and that it's nearly fully regenerated, I'd say we have another two hours before we can safely turn her into a vampire."

What the cyst were they talking about? Why did they need me to have a functional body for making babies? Two hours?

Two hours. I had two hours to escape that fate. What could I do in two hours? My body could barely move, my powers were still on the fritz and I had to get by a vamp and a priest.

Seras. If they kept her, she would also be in my way. If it came down to a showdown, would I be able to kill Seras to escape?

Destroy my friend?

"I hate this, and the bitch vampire I took control of is giving me headaches with her whining and struggles," Jacob's young voice turned cold, "Please let me kill her."

"Alucard's draculina will prove useful. We should keep her alive so that she can face her master. He'll kill her of course but that will prevent Hellsing from looking further for Alex. They will assume that Seras took Alex, turned her into a ghoul then destroyed the ghoul."

Did they really think that Sir Integra would be fooled by such a simple distraction? I was a virgin so Integra would rule out ghoul as what Seras planned. Seras had no will to cross Alucard, so she'd never do that under her own. Plus to fight Alucard? No cysting way. Seras did not have the power to truly face Alucard. She was still too young as a vamp to do it. She had only feed once and consumed a person. Alucard must have hundreds under his belt. No, Sir Integra would reason that Seras was set up as a scapegoat then come searching for me. The vamp me.

A fate worse than any other if they succeeded. I didn't want to be a vamp, especially one these two dratted asshats wanted me to be. Would I have the courage if I was turned to go to Integra to be dealt with? I couldn't risk that uncertainty. I had to avoid that end with all of my strength.

What could one skeletal heathen do in two hours or less to prevent such an undignified fate?

"I'll put the whinny bitch in here so she can watch Alex's last moments. That will torture her while I go finish that patrolman," Jacob's sneer followed a meaty slap of flesh on flesh, "You hear me, bitch? You get to watch Alex be turned into one of us then you'll die at the hands of your master! I love that he'll be all alone again without you two females to entertain him. He'll probably turn on Integra too. Such delightful vengeance."

His twittering laugh made my skin slither as if it wanted to flee from him. I so wanted to run, but I think if I tried I'd fall on my face.

"Jacob, you need to leave before you do something rash," Brendan's voice was low yet commanding, "We do not want another airport incident."

"That was not my fault. You said I had to keep Anderson away from her. I had to focus on the ones blocking him."

"Your mistress told me you had better multitasking skills than what you have demonstrated."

"Your fucking boss didn't fucking tell you Alex had telekinesis!" Jacob's voice edged into high pitched whine, "I should have known all there was to her. It is not my fault she slipped us five times."

If they fought over me, maybe Brendan would kill Jacob, freeing Seras to attack and kill Brendan. Or Brendan could turn and murder Seras after Jacob, leaving me alone with him. Drat it. Where was a knight on a shiny steed when you needed one? I'd take a blood-splattered black armored knight at this point.

"Go eat your human," Brendan stated coldly, "Do not think to come back in until I have called you. Alex must be perfect when we turn her. The perfect Eve to a new era. The Christian era."

Jacob's voice was ugly as he replied, "Eve to a new race of vampires, you mean."

Brendan's chuckle made every hair on my body go rigid as if they'd become rockets and would explode from my body if they could, "You will finally have your girl, and I will have both immortality and family."

A family of female vamps to service him no doubt. This is why celibacy causes mental disorders. Brendan must have gone crazy from the lack of attention to his unmentionables. Probably suffering from not being touched by human hands.

My eyes cracked open and I saw a sliver of light through a doorway.

A black robed figure crossed to the door, "Go Jacob. I'll test her blood again shortly to see exactly when we can turn her."

A slim body that seemed smaller than I remembered passed through the doorway, Jacob's voice tossed over the shoulder, "I will enjoy finally having my pretty. So long since I got to touch her heart and break it."

Brendan waited until Jacob vanished from sight before whispering, "A means to an end."

He turned to me, slowly walked until his groin was even with my face. Too close for my comfort.

"When you are turned, you'll be ordered to turn me. I'll have eternal life and the ability to have children."

He lowered, his face descending towards my chest. Oh cyst, he was going to grope me. Drat it. I couldn't fight my way out of a wet paper bag, much less fight off the pervert priest.

His lips brushed over my collarbone, "What sweet things you'll produce for the glory of god."

Sweet? Vamps were not sweet. They were bloody thirsty monsters that killed humans like boys stamped out ants. They were not part of a benevolent god. This monster in a man form corrupted the true message of his bible into something that more resembled the common vision of Satan. This is why I did not believe in either deity, God nor Satan. Humanity was cruel enough without help from any supernatural power, whether it was God, Satan or Coyote.

Brendan's lips kissed the side of my neck leaving a damp area behind.

He straightened, turned and left, following the path Jacob had taken.

I wanted to wipe the kisses away as they felt like brands. I was not an animal. I was a human being. They had no right to steal my humanity and replace it with vampism. They had no right to abuse me, rape me nor kill me.

Yet there were no police officers to help me here.

How like a god in thought, yet a kitten in action. I was so screwed. I bet if Alucard was here he'd be laughing his ass off at how weak I was.


	47. Donor to Madness

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Trying to work around...well work. Unfortunately I need to work to get money to get stuff to live. Now all I need is a robot to deal with the house chores. ;)

Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the reviews: TheLadyIntegra, Onyx-Muffin, CarmenD, and VampireSiren

I'm glad people are enjoying the story!

;-)

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I slowly turned my head, the lights overhead blinding me. I closed my eyes and continued inching my head so that it was facing the opposite way.

I opened my eyes.

To be face to crotch with someone in a miniskirt. Seras.

It seemed just my day to be at eye level to crotches whether I wanted to or not. Drat it, Alucard must have start this fad. Bad vamp.

I tilted my head to look up.

There was an ugly red mark on her cheek that was fading fast. Her eyes blazed with anger and blood as the welts on her face oozed crimson.

"Seras?"

Her eyes rolled down while her head faced forward.

Pain preceded rage of two people rushing in my head to mix with my own.

Seras' pattern was mixed with another's and it nearly made me sick feeling all that anger inside my weak body. No outlet to release it.

"Seras, your anger is hurting me."

Her eyes softened and the rage was muffled. It seemed she had Alucard's ability to hide her emotions. Good to know. I'd rather play find the vamp through emotions with her.

"Is there a way to get you free? They gave us a Bond moment to escape while they are elsewhere. Who knew villains actually feel for it," I chuckled softly.

Despair swirled through me.

"Well, they didn't leave me with a Bond watch to blast our way out. Is there some way you can get more strength to counter Jacob?"

I never saw a Bond movie where he was naked. I would love to know how he'd handle this situation? Would he be able to come up with something right this instant?

Her eyes slid side to side. No.

Then I had to move. I had to do something.

I used my elbow...elbows. I looked down. Drat, my arm was nearly full size. My fingers looked normal. Cyst. I had no time. Brendan could come back any moment.

Then my elbows gave way and I banged my head on the metal table with a ring. I froze, listening, even as I mentally swore from the pain at the back of my skull.

Had they heard it? Would they come back and destroy me? Oh cysting crap. Couldn't I get one break? Or had I used up all my chances?

Seras' emotions remained calm.

I looked up at her, "Did they hear or are they pretending?"

She looked at me then shook her eyes no.

"No to the first question?"

She looked up and then down, twice.

"Any chance you can move to me and get me standing?"

The rage returned with defeat while she did the eye shake.

I inhaled and tried to get to sitting again, my teeth gnawing my lip as my body quivered from the strain.

I tasted blood as my arms gave up and I was laying down, though this time with less noise and I had gotten up further towards my goal.

I panted for a moment before incomprehensible hungry clawed at my stomach, turning my vision red.

No. Not my hunger. Seras and the second signature in her.

I looked up and saw her eyes were swirling red and the welts were gushing blood now. Was she closer?

Something snapped over her head, glittering silver in the light. She took a full step forward, her eyes locked on my face.

What was bringing her to me? What was giving her the strength to snap the bonds that held her?

Her tongue glided over her lips, smearing the blood before the hunger racketed up in both of us.

Blood. My blood.

My lips had already stopped bleeding. She'd need a better wound to drink from.

There were no sharp edges nearby. What the cyst was I suppose to do to make a big enough wound she could drink from but not have to bite for? That was assuming she had enough will power to not make me a ghoul.

If she made me a ghoul, at least I couldn't be the Eve they wanted.

Another snap and she was now only one step from the metal table I lay on.

No time. I had to make the wound now, or she'd bite my lip.

I looked at my arm, the one I'd regenerated. Oh drat. It looked like I was going to mar that new expanse.

Lifting my wrist to my lips I looked at Seras, "Don't bite me."

Then I bit my own arm.

The flesh resisted for a long moment, then gave with horrendous pain. Copper filled my mouth before I let go of my wrist. I gagged, my stomach rebelling until iron gripped my arm and viscous suction sealed on the wound.

I barely twisted my head aside when the vomit exploded from my throat.

I don't want to be a ghoul. Please Seras, don't change me. I want to live this single life still. No matter the outcome of tonight, no matter I bounced between solid sanity and intense insanity, I wanted to live.

She jerked me up to sitting.

Wheee. I made my goal, though I didn't think I could maintain it on my own.

Ugly black dots danced over my vision before vanishing.

"Seras," I hissed, afraid to speak up louder, "That's enough."

Her tongue probed my wounds, increasing the pain. Oh cyst, was that her gnawing on me?

"Seras, please!"

I felt Brendan's emotions spike as Seras abruptly let go of me.

I collapsed half over the side of the table, staring at the floor and Seras' boots.

Then with a dizzying slid, I tumbled over the edge, thumping my shoulder first on the floor, following it with the rest of my body.

The floor was warmer than me. Either shock or the metal table was really cold.

My eyes were level with what had to be a huge dust bunny and her litter, hiding under the table.

Yeah. Big bad scary monsters out here. You don't want a part of that action. Cyst, I didn't want a part of any of this madness.

Bootsteps rapidly pounded towards the room. Drat it, if I was a ghoul, how come I had no strength to rise? Or was the ghoulification process a drawn out humiliation for the victim? To drain the last drop of humanity from the poor sucker, read me, before oblivion overcame intellect?

Worn brown boots filled the portion of the doorway I could see.

Get up, get up. I certainly didn't want to be a puddle of feminine distress when he got around the table.

My arms trembled as I leveraged myself to my hands and knees.

"Draculina, where is Alex?" Brendan snarled, as if he thought Seras had a voice.

I Saar back on my haunches, as his heavy steps moved around the table.

I looked up at him just as he moved into sight.

He pointed a gun at Seras, though his eyes slid down to me.

The sick delight in those putrid depths made me nauseous all over again.

"What a strong girl to waken so quickly from the animal tranquilizers."

"Animal!" my voice was shrill and buzzing with my fury, "You doped me up like a fucking sheep?"

He lowered the gun, smirking, "Oh so righteous now. Such a wonderful No Life Queen you'll make. One even the vampire who made this whore will have to steer clear of."

Seras hadn't moved at all. Had all my blood gone to nothing? Or had Jacob retaken control of her?

As I felt human still, I figured maybe I had avoided a ghoulish demise through Jacob's intervention. I had mixed feelings on that. Good I still lived, really bad as I'm sure he'd turn me in an instant.

"At least he knows how to show a girl a good time, pestilent priest," I gave Brendan a smirk, "Knows all the sweet caresses a woman desires."

Inside me came a feeling of challenge, of superiority to this child. If I could get him closer to my level, maybe I could steal his gun. There was a sense of justice to bringing him pain with his own dratted gun. To draw him in using the very body he coveted and the personality he detested. Though I think in the back of my head a voice was screaming to sit still, to not draw the attention of the wolf.

Brendan's face went livid with anger, his emotions battering at the snarling beast inside me, "He is nothing. He is devil spawn. His touch is as cold as space and as empty."

Laughter rose out of my throat, much preferred to bile at his words, "No priest. He is as hot as our star, as wicked as solar wind that touches our atmosphere, and as unfathomable as a black hole," my hand reached up, gripped the table.

I was surprised when I felt two grips. I looked at my hands, two of them before I used them. How easy it had been to adjust to having no arm, then to suddenly feel the world twist at having it back.

Somehow my skeletal arms had the strength to heave me to my unsteady feet, "You are the mere speck of ash to him. Even if you turned me, he would always be brilliant to your shade," my eyes dug into him, tearing at his insignificant sense of self.

The blow twisted me into the table, before my feet gave out and I hit floor once again, back first this time.

Maybe I should stay on the ground as it so often seemed to punish me for standing. Nah, I'd never give it the satisfaction of besting me. I had two arms again. Ha, ha, I had the upper hand now.

I looked up at the priest, the smile of triumph crossing my lips.

No matter what happened next, I won. I got him mad.

I was no passive Eve. I was a Lilith. A woman who defied those who believed in God.

Horror crossed Brendan's expression as his eyes locked on my arm.

Oh cyst. Had this illusionary moment of strength been but my inescapable descent into flesh eating zombie?

I was afraid to look, yet compelled to do so.

My eyes slid down to the floor, then up my fingers to my wrist.


	48. Two Descend into the Maw

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Whee. Extra long chapter everyone.

Reviews are very welcome!

No reviews this time, so I hope you were so into the chapter you spaced writing. ;)

I'm glad people are enjoying the story!

;-)

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At first I only saw a black bruise that was pierced with crimson flesh.

Seras had done a real number on me. I was going to turn into a ghoul after all.

What fucking lovely irony.

I died by a friend's hand...well mouth.

"You are too lucid to be one of the shuffling undead," Brendan's voice sounded tinny.

My eyes then put the red areas together into a pattern.

The black and blue bruising made it look like I had more teeth marks than there were.

Only my teeth had breached my skin.

I looked up at Seras, into unblemished skin and crimson glee.

She smirked, showing serrated shark teeth before she hauled back her arm and punched Brendan.

He flew into a wall, then through the shattered remains of it.

The dark swallowed him from my sight.

A nearly hysterical giggle slipped my lips, "He's a real Holy Priest."

Seras knelt, unbuttoning her uniform jacket, "What?"

I grinned at her, "He's gone through a hole. So he's a hole-y priest. Get it?"

She paused, looked up. She then vanished into the floor, rage pulsing sickly in my head again.

"Aww," I scowled at where she'd vanished, "Don't like that humor, huh?"

Then with a jolting realization, I knew the fiery ire in my head wasn't Seras. It was Jacob.

"Kill Jacob," I grabbed the table again, leveraged myself to my feet again, "where's my nifty Asian blade? I don't have the five finger palm of death to help me out here. I think though I could do better than Black Mamba."

Jacob rushed to the door, gaped at me, then his eyes went to the hole that was all Brendan had left him.

"Let me guess," he smiled as if he was talking to a child, "You tossed Seras into him, ridding yourself of two enemies."

"Ha, something that a pitiful twerp like you will never know for sure."

He was so...short. When had the hideous towering monster of my youth become a petulant looking child barely starting his teens?

Heck, I was taller than him now, even when I wasn't really standing, so much as waiting to collapse again.

"Since you have your telekinesis back, you can't be under the Sister bitch's drugs, my pretty," he grinned like a spoiled child given yet another toy by an overindulgent parent.

"You think you can handle a real woman, Jacob?" I made my voice sweet with a drawl, "Ya think ya can handle the sugar, sugar? A pretty boy like ya can't hold down his sparkly water, much less me, sugar."

His expression peeled away to show the baby vamp underneath. He wasn't Alucard's level of skill, power nor experience. I doubted any living vamp could match Alucard. The dead ones, well they couldn't be his equal obviously.

I had to provoke Jacob into an attack. To drop his guard so I could kill him. Or to maneuver him into dying. Somehow.

"Ya know sugar," I let my eyes go dreamy, "I don't need no boy, when I can have a man. No little boy like ya could ever handle this flame like he does."

"Stop talking like that nurse bitch."

"Why should I, sugar? Ya never did stop her. Even then ya couldn't handle a women. No wonder ya ain't adequate to do anything ol' thing right."

His lips lifted from his teeth so far that blackened gum showed.

"Shut up, my pretty."

"Ya know, Jakey," I sang the pet name the nurse used for him, "I think ya forgot I am a real woman. I'm not a blow up sex doll ya can fondle, abuse then go buy another, sugar."

He howled, a harrowing sound that made me jump.

His eyes turned red with bloodlust and he leapt at me over the table. The seconds seemed to slow down, like those hyper-dramatic scenes in a movie where screaming women sound like guys and the good guys have just enough time to turn, face the risen bad guy and take him down.

Not for me. Too fast, he was too cysting fast. I'd never get a wall up in time but I'd try like drat to do it. Never go down without a fight.

Never give up, never surrender. I remember that from some funny space movie.

I started to bring up a telekinetic wall, but a flash of green and white broke my concentration.

Jacob half turned, surprise crossing his face before he was jerked to a stop, his body contorting.

Seras stood, her arm stoping at the elbow before Jacob's flesh took over. The rest of her arm must have pierced his side, going through his ribcage and a lung on it's way to the heart.

"This bloody bitch," Seras crooned in victory, "Says you are nothing but shit."

Her arm flexed and Jacob screamed, "No!"

Then he dusted, showering both me and Seras with his remains.

We both looked like we had rolled in a dusty attic once it all settled.

It was over, it was all over. My enemies had been vanquished, so now all I needed was a rising sun to ride off into, like those old Westerns. Yippee!

Seras pulled off her jacket and draped it over my shoulders, "We need to get you to a bloody doctor."

"Only if he cleans up first."

She frowned at me as she secured the top button, "Whatever do you mean, Alex?"

"If he's covered in blood, he isn't sanitary."

She shook her head, "I don't know if you are going into shock, blood loss or something else with this humor," she smiled, "But we are alive and will make it back to Sir Integra."

"That sounds lovely," I smiled back at her, "We didn't need Alucard to beat the bad guys. We aren't just pretty faces."

"With the power of your blood, any dracul would be as effective."

"You mean my virgin blood? It gives you more power, like a super-duper energy drink?"

She straightened, opened her mouth to speak.

Boom.

I stared as Seras flew across the room to slam into a wall, then slide down, a trail of crimson wetly shimmering, pointing down to her like a macabre "Look here" arrow.

My ears were ringing but I heard the voice clearly.

"God is my Shepard. I will not allow you to bite our Eve, fallen one."

Brendan wasn't dead?

I turned, knowing that if this was a movie, I shouldn't have looked. The girl who looks gets killed by the monster, even human ones.

He stepped through the hole, eyes on Seras as she lay crumpled next to the door.

"It does not matter. It is easy to find another dracul to turn our Eve. I will have my immortality. My family."

He ignored me, enraged eyes on Seras.

Why did he think she'd be a problem. That shot must have killed her, as I felt no emotions.

After all that work, all my spilt blood, and he killed her anyway? How come she didn't...

I was such a doofus. A dead vamp dusted. Seras was alive.

He stood on the opposite side of the table from me, aiming at Seras' head, his grin wide.

"Now to break Dracula's line once more. You will never be a thorn in our sides again."

Seras looked up weakly, "Alex would never be a submissive draculina. She is too much for you to handle."

Brendan cocked the gun, the noise more frightening than if he had shot, "Any words you'd like to leave for your master?"

"The reign of Christ has ended in the blood of innocence," she coughed, crimson splattering from her lips, "How noble of you to besmirch the gift your savior gave you."

I felt Brendan's anger before he started to pull the trigger.

I reached out with my mind, seized the gun and jerked it up.

Dust, plaster fragments and chunks of ceiling rained down with the gunshot, while something metal slapped my hand.

I waved the airborne debris away, wondering if Brendan would leap at me through it.

Then I heard screaming, high pitched squeals, like a pained pig.

I searched through the cloud as it dissipated, coughing at the dust.

Seras appeared, still slumped, blinking, surprised, but with no more wounds.

"You heathen bitch!"

My head snapped to Brendan.

He was holding his hand, pressing on a gushing wound.

His index finger was missing, the flesh torn.

I looked down into my hand. His gun lay there with his missing finger.

I pulled the finger carefully from the trigger, then looked at Brendan.

His eyes widened in alarm.

Tossing aside the finger, I gripped the gun and pointed it at Brendan. The safety was off.

"How do you like this Lilith, Satan's priest?" my voice lowered with my anger, "How do you like this monster?"

His eyes darted to Seras, "She...she couldn't have turned you. You cannot be a draculina."

"Isn't that what you wanted? A new monster? To rip the flesh from the young? To raze olden cities? To destroy the very heart of humanity with bloodlust?"

"You would not be the monster. You would be the mother of a new race," the little panicked flashes in his eyes mirrored the ones jabbing my head.

"What do I become once bitten? I'll know if you lie," I could feel his intent to do just that, "What manner of beastie were you going to corrupt me into? A vampire able to cross blessed barriers?"

He looked stubborn.

I cocked the gun, and his face lost the stubborn look.

"Seras, would you be able to lick up his knowledge?"

"Yes, with some help in spilling it."

Brendan backed up into a shelf at waist level, nearly falling on it, "I am a man of God."

I cocked my head, "That's supposed to mean I should let you go? To let you rape other virgins? To fuck over the lives of the future?"

"You wouldn't kill a human, Alex. Humanity makes the evils of the world and you wouldn't want to be just another murderer."

That made me pause.

Everyone could be redeemed, given time. Hadn't I seen that with Anderson? He had been an oath-breaking cyst of a blood relation, but he was more complex than that. He could do good deeds that benefitted non-believers. He loved me in spite of his Iscariot mission.

If Brendan couldn't be saved, then he could...

I felt the triumph and resolution before Brendan picked up a knife laying on the shelf.

He started to turn towards Seras.

The trigger instantly reacted to my finger, blowing Brendan into the shelf, his weight crumpling it.

He stared down at his chest where my bullet had punctured his flesh, letting loose his mortal life.

"Eve. Another Adam will tame you. You will birth the new undead," he smirked at me, gloating viciousness sinking into my brain, "You will be only the vessel."

His eyes fogged over with his death as his breath rattled out.

I walked to him, each step shaking me.

I knelt, keeping the gun trained on him as I secured the knife.

What did I become? Why all this death and misery over me? Why?

"Alex? Alex, you need to look at me."

My head turned, feeling heavy on my neck, like a balancing boulder on a thin stick.

She gazed at me for a long moment before reaching above her head and sinking her fingers through the plaster. She pulled herself to standing in a painful looking pull.

"You are grey, Alex. I think we should get you somewhere warm."

"Oh?"

She slowly walked, almost a shamble, towards me, "Bloody hell, Alex. You shouldn't be alive."

"Alive and kicking, after a brutal licking," I sang before giggling.

She gripped my wounded arm, instantly sending pain up into my cobwebbed mind, a sharp blade that sliced away the cotton numbness.

She drew my arm over her shoulder, securing me to her with her free hand, "Brendan had a van. I can drive you to a hospital."

"Really? We'll visit the bloody doctor?" I swallowed another fit of hysterical giggles, "Cause I'm sick and tired of being someone's punching bag."

She paused, "I hear helicopters and trucks."

"The calvary?" I hoped so, because I so didn't want to clean up this mess.

Let someone else get that duty. I wanted a nice big bed with soft cushy pillows and warm blankets.

Seras hiked me up so most of my weight was on her hip, "I do not know. We will want to be on the ground floor when they arrive," she moved us into the area beyond the door.

A hallway.

At the far end, there was deep shadows hiding all but a banister that faded downwards.

"What, I don't rank the prime floor rooms?"

She slowly trudged with me towards the dark stairwell, "There is no way to hide lights on the lower floor."

"Oh? Cysting lovely," my eyes slid to the side, looked into a familiar looking hole.

Then it hit me where I'd seen it before.

Alucard's gun left holes like that.

"Alucard was here?"

"We were. It was my first mission where I...encountered Father Anderson."

I looked at her, "Wow. Was it a gunfight?"

"He decapitated Alucard and I fled."

The tone of shame irked me, "Seras, you are so not up for taking on my grandfather. You need a few more years before you can face him as an equal."

She stopped at the top of the landing, "I was so weak that a lesser dracul took control of me."

"And I was so weak, that I've been kidnapped three times. Three!" I scowled at the steps descending into a maw, "So on the weakling scale, I have you beat by a factor of three."

She sighed, "My weakness has caused you to have to give up blood you cannot afford to lose, Alex."

I frowned at her for a long moment, experiencing her shame, defeat, resignation. Then I slapped her.

She gaped at me.

"Like Sir Integra says," my voice mimicked her voice instantly, "Search and destroy. Leave no enemy standing."

She looked like for half a second she was going to whine or burst into tears. Then she inhaled a short breath, squared her shoulders, make me lose my footing on the ground for a moment.

"Let's see who is calling on us," she nodded her head.

She stepped down to the first step.

It creaked threateningly but did nothing else as our combined weight settled on it.

She took the next step, which didn't complain at our weight.

I heard the whirring sound of helicopter blades, and distant tires on gravel, "I so love your hearing, Seras."

She chuckled as she placed her foot on the next step, bringing me down with her.

The step gave out, pitching us both unto the nasty edges of the steps, tumbling us around.

Some days it doesn't pay to be me.


	49. To Be Victorious or Not

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the reviews: Ghost0Silvers, Onyx-Muffin and VampireSiren

One thing I learned from The Tick Series: dénouement. Its where the good guys beat the bad guy, or the bad guy defeats the good guy.

;-)

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When the world stopped twirling like a baton in a cheerleader's hand, I blinked at a pockmarked ceiling.

Pain struck here and there from my body, where the evil stairs had sucker punched me on the way down.

Spiky hair intruded on my appraisal of the holes and the throbs in my body.

I looked down and had to struggle with the need to laugh.

Sera's face was planted firmly between my breasts.

"You know, I think our visitors will love this scene if they are all male. So would you mind moving so we don't give them a free show?"

She groaned, pushed herself to the side and laid down, "I shouldn't have got out of the coffin this evening," she blinked, "That didn't sound very human."

"Sounds normal to me. I should be in my bed, too," I slowly rolled to my hands and knees, panting at the effort, "But here...we are...with unknown...guests...on their way."

She grabbed the wall, lifting herself to her feet, swaying, "We are all a mess. They'll run away from us. Or something worse."

I grabbed her hand, pulled myself up to her level, "Really? Two dusty women enough to frighten away the men? I doubt it but I may not be in the best frame of mind. They could find us laugh worthy, or an immediate call to the nearest hospital needed."

I drew in a deep breath and tasted musty yuck on my tongue, "Did I just swallow a cobweb?"

"A bug," she gave the eew face, before she wrapped her arm around me, steading us both, "The trucks are almost here. The helicopters are circling overhead."

She tilted her head up, and we dangerously leaned backward. I grabbed the wall to regain our stability.

"Eyes front and center, Seras. I don't want to be on the floor again."

I looked ahead to the brightest rectangle on the floor. The door out of this dank dungeon. That looked pretty cysting far for me to walk.

Seras got us into motion, slowly creeping forward, "I hope it's Sir Integra."

"That would be amazing, but unlikely knowing my luck. It's probably Brendan's mother superior or something. Or Jacob's vamp mom. She'll yell at me for being the end of him. Typical mother action."

"If the clues I left were accurately deciphered, it would be Sir Integra."

"Clues?" I looked at her, then smiled, "You outfoxed Jacob, didn't you?"

"I said Walter instead of William, to key William into the fact treachery was afoot from a trusted source. I then wrote my report for this location since Jacob," she spat the name in disgust, "showed me where he was meeting that priest."

I laughed, "And it was a place you already had a mission for so Jacob didn't know you had left Sir Integra a fucking map. Brilliant. Cysting, fucking genius, Seras."

She grinned, panting with each step, "Yes. He may have forced me to take you, but I wasn't going to let him have you for very long. I was hoping to find a loophole in his power to get you out of his range."

"Thanks. I don't think I want to be this new Eve of a new monster type anyway. Doesn't come with fringe benefits."

We stopped right beside the doorway leading to freedom, "What ones did you want?" she asked in a strained tone.

"If I'm going to have children, it will be with someone I like most of the time. Fringe benefit is sharing the care of such important bundles of future. Plus massages. If I'm going to suffer through a pregnancy I will, by the collective process of humanity, have massages."

She giggled, then froze.

Tires rolled to a stop out there, beyond the door. Then I heard booted feet on gravel, a very unfriendly reverberation.

"You want ranged or close combat if our guests are of the shoot first ask question later sort?" I whispered, trying not to slump to my knees.

"You are a better shot," she took the knife from me, "It was a pleasure working with you, Alex."

"Oh, you so aren't doing that. You just jinxed us."

She looked at me in surprise, "How so?"

I rolled my eyes, "Anytime a character in a movie says that, they either get shot, or get their partner shot. Since I'm here I'm the one most likely to get hurt. And I know I will never set a date for retirement. That a certain death sentence."

She looked at the door, "I say bollocks to that. There is no jinx."

We went silent as the clicks of what sounded like a hundred safeties switching to off reached us.

"Into the breach, my dear friend?" I asked.

She swallowed, "I rather die with you than go back alive while you are dead."

I felt the real reason in her emotions, "Let me guess, Alucard torturing you for a few decades is not preferable to dying here?"

"He terrifies me."

"Seras, he terrifies me as well. So shall we see who we face as either friend or foe of women?"

She gripped me about the waist and we stepped out.

Bright light blinded me, forcing tears out of my eyes.

I tried to see pass the whiteness to who we faced, even as my head pounded with pain.

Shadows crossed the spots where the light was brightest, soldiers readjusting their positions.

"Seras, who are we facing?" I whispered.

Then her support of me dropped away.

I turned to her, watched her hit the ground, blood coating her back. She didn't try to stand again.

"Seras?" I swayed, barely keeping my feet. Where the drat was my strength?

She didn't dust, but was this collapse possibly a precursor to her death?

My legs trembled as I wondered if I should kneel to check on her, or if in the middle of that act I'd fall on Seras and worsen her situation.

"...Alexandra Hannah Jones-Jordan," a voice commanded.

I looked toward the centermost light. Only one person used that tone with me.

Three silhouettes moved through the aura.

Was it...please let it be Sir Integra. Home. I wanted my own bed and days of quiet. Too many things had happened in too short a time.

I needed moments or better yet years to determine what this whole stupidity Jacob and Brendan had been trying to accomplish.

"Alex, report."

"Sir Integra," I swallowed my dry mouth, reducing the rasp, "Two targets silenced. Jacob, the puppeteer, and Brendan, traitor priest."

One of the figure's moved to my left, the light moving from hiding the face to showing Michael's grim set jaw.

"Alex," he said softly, "Give me the gun."

I blinked at him, watching his mouth, the cobwebs drifting in silken strands over my thoughts, the pain taking more of my attention.

What was he talking about?

The center figure nodded to Michael.

He moved to my side, eyes on mine, as he bent his knees.

His fingers were hot against mine, his callouses a bit shocking against my skin.

He took something from my grip, straightened.

He backed up, did something with the fuzzy object in his hands, stating, "Gun, safetied, Sir Integra."

"Was Seras part of this plot willingly?" Integra snapped.

"No. She fought Jacob's control. If she had been...if she had assisted them, I would not be standing here as a human, battered as is seems."

She stepped forward, her face becoming visible to my gaze.

Something about her outfit was trying to draw my attention, but I was locked on her cold militant stare.

"Were you bitten?"

The world swirled, sending Integra upside down.

I tried to say, "Only my teeth had broken my skin," but I thought that maybe I mumbled it.

Heat scorched my side, vibrations pulsing into me at Mel's voice, "They stripped her naked, sir. How in heaven did she get free?"

No heaven had aided me. Only a vamp who was my sister in arms. How many people could claim that in their lifetime?

I felt every muscle loosen and my legs collapsed.

I saw only darkness.


	50. Temptation to Desire

The only characters I own are Alex, Sonny, Mel, Michael, William, various vamps that die, minor characters. Yes, I do have to lay claim to Marvin "the Martian" Marcellini. All others are not mine though I wish they were ;)

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Reviews are very welcome!

Thanks for the reviews: Lucifella, Master of the Boot

;-)

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I woke to a familiar ceiling.

Hot drat, I'd won. I was home.

How long had I been out?

Mel's joyous emotions filled my mind, almost singing to me.

He must be fondling his guitar again. Upstairs somewhere, distant from me.

There was boredom much closer to me.

My eyes wouldn't open. I tried twice to open my lids, but they refused my efforts.

Cyst.

This was worse than before. I was weaker than a baby. A baby could crawl and see. I doubt I could even do the first.

Footsteps, heavy with foreboding approached my bed from the far side of the room.

I knew those boots quite well.

Alucard.

He stopped above me. I could sense him towering even without my eyes. Well lovely. You'd think he'd get tired of doing that to us short mortals.

I felt his gaze, a tangible weight across my face.

I rasped out between numb lips, "I think you win in looking good after a fight competition."

He laughed, the maniacal sound bouncing around the stone walls.

"You had more fun."

"Only because I'm not invincible," the statement was sour.

"That is something I forget about you."

"Not hard to forget from my end."

"You have survived things only a draculina could have. I feel as if you are already mine."

I turned my head towards his voice, curious, "I'm not. Not even in the ballpark."

"Closer than you know," he paused then purred in an irritating manner, "My master."

"Alucard, have you told her?" Integra's voice sounded as weary as her emotions.

"Not yet, my master."

I heard her steps then, then what might have been my chair being moved.

Cigar smoke tugged on my nose a few seconds latter.

"We secured Brendan's notes. It seems your brother was the reason they pursued you with such abandon."

"Kevin?" oh collective decisions, how had he caused all this?

"No, Jeremy, or J as he was known since he was turned. According to the notes he has shattered a rule that all vampires to date had been subjected to."

She went silent as I was trying to determine what she could mean. Her emotions swirled with disgust and insult.

"Sir Integra?"

She exhaled, the cigar smoke instantly making me want to sneeze, "Your brother was able to father children."

"Child...ren?" horror washed through me, making me dizzy even with closed eyes.

"Vampires no matter if they were dracul or draculina cannot birth children as humans do. At least until J," Integra stated, continuing on with each blow like a blacksmith molding a sword, "He has fathered half human half vampire children. According to the notes he has two female children and ten male ones."

Twelve. Twelve possible little monsters I would have to take out. When would I be free of slaying my own kinsmen? What could they possibly want me for when they had Jeremy?

My mouth opened to ask that last question of Integra when she spoke, "The females couldn't conceive but the male children could with human women. The result was children with more power than a human but not as much as the half vampires."

"Quarter vampires?" even more? Oh cyst. I wished for once I was ignorant again.

So much could go wrong with these new vampires. How many people have they killed? How many more would suffer? How many people had died at the hands of beings that shouldn't exist?

Integra's comment broke my thoughts into millions of pieces, "Yes, diluting the bloodlines until they become human again. Which is why they needed you. J was to be Anderson's successor when he was made a dracul. He had already passed the test that was mis-applied to you."

I knew then, "A regenerator who becomes a dracul or draculina are able to produce children. They needed a female regenerator to produce females able to bear children, children who are fully vampire. I'm the only female they'll get unless Anderson produces another child. They had to get me. I'm the only one who could make their viscous dream real."

Vampires not restricted to virgins. With new abilities, maybe new resistances.

"That is what Brendan's notes bear out. It caused them no little fear when you suddenly vanished from your hometown."

"Because they couldn't guarantee I was a virgin anymore."

"You hold the future of the vampires in your hands, Alex. With you vampires will not be doomed to limited numbers with the sexual freedom the current generations enjoy. You can follow Brendan's plan or you can fight it."

"They have opened Pandora's box," I murmured unhappily, "but this time no hope escapes."

"What is your decision, Alex?"

"In what, Sir Integra?" I was missing something.

"I know the question that Alucard has pestered you with since your arrival at Hellsing. With this information, you must decide your path."

If I'd been standing, I would have slumped like Atlas. I literally bore the weight of the world in my shoulders.

I could drop it, dooming countless people, or shield it from harm with my own body from the mortals posing as the four horsemen.

Integra left with the parting shot, "You'll be back in the field regardless of your decision once you are fully recovered, Alex."

How did one weigh their actions with knowledge and desires? I desired to be with Alucard, to fully understand what a draculina was.

Yet that insanity would lead to the creation of a new monster. A monster capable of destroying humanity, breaking its creative drive like waves upon a sand castle.

But if I stayed human, that presented so many problems to myself and others.

If I remained a virgin, some vamp could in the near future bite me and make me what Brendan and his allies wanted.

If I found someone mortal and settled down, he would constantly be in danger.

Any children we had could, no, would have the same potential as me. How could I make the next generation suffer for one man's delusion of godhood?

They'd be trapped the same as me.

I felt my fingers curl into fists.

My moralities and ideals had trapped me as effectively as chains.

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It took a week before Gary would let me outside my room. On one condition.

I sat near the gun range, wrapped in a blanket and light jacket.

In a wheelchair.

Inside, I was trying my best not to curse this because I was sure if I cursed about this I'd find myself in a worse situation.

My weight and strength was slowly returning under William's tender care, with a side of Gary's idea of modern torture.

Which might be why they let me outside tonight. I had threatened to kick one of them in the nuts and it wasn't the one who brought me food.

I hadn't slept since Sir Integra dropped the two bombs. Work and future.

Desires, needs, and what was right to do argued in my head.

To choose destruction of the world for what I wanted, or be alone forever, a spinster or crazy cat lady for the rest of my life.

In my heart I knew if I choose the path of the draculina, then I'd be a hypocrite. I'd be less than me. I would not be Alex the humanist.

Yet I felt a coward for choosing to ignore my desires, my wants, to deny myself. To subjugate a part of me.

I rubbed my eyes as a breeze played with my hair. Inside I was being torn apart and how those pieces rearranged would determine who I was in the future. The decision was bigger than what I could handle.

I could handle fighting childish vamps, corrupt Vatican agents and CIA equivalents. To fight oneself is the hardest thing to do.

From now on I had to discourage Alucard. To meet every innuendo with fire, to challenge his every query to join him with denial.

Then fight each and every vamp with the fury of the entire human race. To remove them so that my potential would never break upon this world.

It was the only solution. Unless I found some normal man. Then this would all start over again.

"...thinking too much again, Judas Girl."

I blinked, turned my head then tilted my head up to Alucard, "What?"

"You are merely delaying the inevitable. You are thinking too much again, Judas Girl," his voice slightly more lord-to-servant than before.

"Well excuse me for considering the whole impact of this one decision on humanity!" I snapped hurt by that dratted tone of his, "I'm not some...some trollop who will willy-nilly doom our planet. So if you want one, then go find a dunderhead to make as your draculina."

I put my hands on the dratted wheels and whirled my cysting chair around to go back inside.

His hands covered then pinned mine so I couldn't go anywhere.

Cyst.

"Alucard," I started, turning my head to snipe at him over my shoulder.

He took advantage of my open mouth, teasing me with a searing kiss.

I blinked at him when he pulled away.

"That is an unfair weapon," I glared at him even though much of my anger has dissipated.

He smirked, that smart-aleck grin making him look mischievous.

"If I ask you to become my draculina," he started.

"No," I said if firmly with no hesitation.

I had to be strong otherwise I'd kill this world.

He released one hand to pull off his glasses, leaned into my space, leading with his crimson eyes, "Why?"

I sighed, knowing he'd laugh at me later, "I'm not willing to compromise my morals and the safety of my species for what I desire. I've been backed into a corner with walls of the danger I hold, floors of my standards, and ceilings that are of my own binding. The choice to become your draculina is through those walls. I would give up being a person of shelter and protection to become one of destruction and death. I fear that I would open the door to great catastrophe and in doing so would destroy myself. Wreck what I had made to date so that no good shall come evermore."

"Loss of your people and oneself," he murmured.

"I am the Pandora's box of my age. My passion has been swept aside for the shield I must provide to my fellow men and women. If I were to give in to such frailties of flesh and heart, I would give no hope as a draculina," I swallowed hating I had to take back my own words, "I said once I thought I could become a draculina and remain the same. I doubt that now, with this new information."

"You think you are a coward for choosing this way," he pressed into my face, his crimson eyes and black hair blocking out even the stars, "for declining the path Seras and I walk."

He said it far more as a statement of a fact than a question.

"It is cowardly to retreat from my enemies when they have treed me into this decision," I growled, the sick twisting in my stomach sharpening my words.

"Then you should be a draculina."

"What the cyst?" I stared into his swirling crimson eyes in surprise, "Did you take extra strength crazy pills this evening?"

He snorted, straightened, "Do you really think I want a desire-crazed vampire? I would have to kill such a draculina. Those that resist indulgences last through the centuries."

I raised an eyebrow as I felt his emotions spike in amusement, "And you and your indulgences?"

"I indulge as long as the others are kept in line."

"I couldn't do that."

"Which is why you are Judas Girl. No, Alex Jones-Jordan," his grin threatened to split his face, "You would fight to save humanity even if I forced you to become a draculina."

He faded away to my snarl, "I won't let you change me."

I smelled smoke before a rosary was dropped into my lap.

My hands barely snatched it in time to avoid having it roll off my lap.

"So that is your decision, Alex?"

Integra stepped in front of my chair, inhaling deeply of her cigar.

"Yes, sir," I realized I was holding the rosary Sean had given me.

"And it is, Alex?"

"I will not become a draculina by choice. I will remain human as long as I am able, Sir Integra."

"Then keep Father Sean's rosary or Anderson's bible on you at all times. The addition of blessed objects will reduce any attacks," she ordered, "Will you be pursuing the married life?"

"That is not my intention, Sir Integra," who'd want to wed me when I got into trouble practically on a daily basis?

"What will you do once you have your strength back?"

"There will always be monsters, be they vamp or human. There will be victims in need of a shield. I will provide the cover for them to retain their blissful ignorance of these monsters."

She nodded, "During you downtime?"

I frowned at that question but answered, "Play my game, practice my abilities to provide additional tricks in my bag, consider all my decisions."

She gave a small smile, "We could gain many allies if we lure Sister Kate and that village from the Vatican."

I blinked a few times, a tickle growing in my throat.

Then I was laughing hard enough I was afraid I'd break into a coughing fit. I suspected it sounded nasty.

"That would be a great tactical advantage, Sir Integra," I wiped tears from my eyes, "but it will take time and careful maneuvers. Marvin and his peers will oppose such action."

She grinned, "Then we should begin to woo them once you are recovered enough to tempt Sister Kate to our shores."

I smiled back, then looked up to the stars, "We shall see if reason shall persuade them to our path."

"If not your effectiveness in combat without belief will do so," she turned and walked back to the mansion.

In this life all that matters are our decisions and what memories are left to become history.

Whatever the future held, even if it was endless storms, I had choose the path strewn with needles.

I pushed my chair into motion, sending myself back into battle. To protect humanity. Even those who believed so deeply they would kill us all.

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Author's Notes:

When I started this fanfic two years ago I had one goal. To write a story that was consistent the whole way through. At the time I thought the hardest thing to stay consistent with is someone else's universe and characters.

Along the way I think I have accomplished that goal. For those who are wondering what my source material was, it was the manga (before book 9) and the Hellsing Ultimate edition anime. If I had written this from the original anime this would have had a vastly different feel, especially in regards to Father Anderson.

In the course of reading other fanfics and forums I came to have other goals with this story. One is Seras. In many fanfics, she is portrayed as dumb, clumsy, naive or more bloodthirsty than Alucard. She was a police officer. She may have been slow on the uptake in the anime/manga in being a vampire, but as a person she is not dumb. She wouldn't have been a police officer in the first place if she lacked the brains to do it. In addition, I doubt Alucard would stand for a dumb draculina. Imagine spending years with someone who you had to explain everything to? That would be pretty boring. That is why in this story I showed Seras as a real strong person. She is smart. She just needs the right situation, one where she can shine.

Another goal was to write a solid mystery, one with twists and moments where readers feel for the characters and wonder where they are going. I loved seeing comments on scenes where people enjoyed the byplay, or connections between certain characters (several have mentioned the hug between Seras and Alex) or fear that Alex would die, or those who wanted her to rise as a draculina.

I will admit that I made this a Mary Sue. I thank those people who brought the term to my notice as I didn't know what it meant. In the course of researching this term I have been given better understanding of myself and hopefully a way to make characters that are not based on, well, myself. Though I have to admit, I think a lot of us really want our characters to be Mary Sues in our favorite worlds. ;)

When I got to chapter 34 I started thinking of how I would end this, especially in light of my character being a Mary Sue. There were a few options. One, Alex dies (as in permanently). She accomplished her goals and could peacefully go into nonexistence. I even entertained the notion of Alucard consuming her so she became a shade as a sub ending under this category. She would no longer exist but a part of her would go on, even if it was in a crazy homicidal vampire. The second type of ending was her becoming a draculina. This would have been an interesting end, but it would break what I felt was the core of Alex's character once she knew what she could do. Plus, she'd be with Alucard...hmmm that might be more torture because she'd have to learn fast and he isn't too patient with Seras right now. This would have opened a whole can of worms to end a story with, though would provide plenty of material for further stories which will not give me even one chance of earning a few extra bucks. Or to end it with her still human, still Alex, still being tempted by Alucard to become a vampire, still in the middle of a cold war between Hellsing, the Vatican and all other forces in the world.

The last of course allows other fanfic writers to take what I have started and write their own stories with endless possibilities.

I would like to also thank those who commented on their religious views. I hope that you enjoyed reading about Alex and maybe have some thoughts about how you'd see this situation or one in which you meet a non-believer. Please remember that not everyone is of the same faith and calm discourse where both sides listen and talk will go much further than yelling at others that they are wrong. And yes, I have been yelled at by those who identify themselves as Christians and Catholics. I know each person will respond differently even when they are in the same sub sect of a particular religion. I hope to make many more friends who are of a belief system but don't hold my lack of belief against me as a person.


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